Category: Humour

The 'Mind the Paint' Girl: A Comedy in Four Acts

The HTML version of this e-text includes the third-act song ("If you would only, only love me") in three forms: raw lilypond (.ly extension, can be converted to other formats), .pdf (image), and MIDI file. Some sites will allow you to download these files individually; if so,...

Chapters

7. Chapter 7

[_Nodding._] H'm; that was my start in the world. Father kept a small shop in Kennington-- Gladwin Street, near the Oval. We sold groceries, and butter and eggs and cheese, and...

8. Chapter 8

[_After a further pause._] Ah, well--! [_With a deep sigh._] Ah, well! [_To FARNCOMBE, resignedly._] Farncombe, I-- I'm afraid I'm a shocking brute. I-- I got carried away. Forg...

6. Chapter 6

_A prettily designed "fitment" runs along the left-hand wall and the further wall, taking in the fireplace and doors as part of its scheme. On either side of the fireplace there...

1. Chapter 1

The HTML version of this e-text includes the third-act song ("If you would only, only love me") in three forms: raw lilypond (.ly extension, can be converted to other formats),...

3. Chapter 3

I've a very charming dwelling, (You know where without the telling) Decorated in a style that's rather quaint! Smart and quaint! When you pay my house a visit, You may scrutinis...

2. Chapter 2

The fact is, Lily and I had a slight tiff coming home last night. [_Sitting on the settee in front of the writing-table._] Ha! I suppose she kept it from me to pay me out. [_Sha...

5. Chapter 5

[_FARNCOMBE is bending over LILY while she is eating her ice and they are talking lightly but intently. GABRIELLE, finding that she is "out of it," rises with a pout and, carryi...

4. Chapter 4

Will yer! An extra thong! That'th all it need be-- an extra thong! Oh, it would be _thuch_ an improvement! [_VON RETTENMAYER enters at the double-door. The waiters now go to the...

9. Chapter 9

[_To JIMMIE._] P'sh! [_Impressively._] Ma-- Lily-- for years-- longer than it's agreeable to count-- I've been a patron of the drama-- particularly musical comedy, of which I've...