William Wycherley [Four Plays]

SCENE III.--_The old Pall Mall.

Chapter 13579 wordsPublic domain

_Enter_ RANGER _and_ DAPPERWIT.

_Ran._ Now the Lucys have renounced us, hey for the Christinas! She cannot use me worse than your honourable mistress did you.

_Dap._ A pox! some young heir or another has promised her marriage. There are so many fools in the world, 'tis impossible for a man of wit to keep his wench from being a lady, let me perish!

_Ran._ But have you no other acquaintance that sticks to her vocation, in spite of temptations of honour or filthy lucre? I declare, I make honourable love merely out of necessity, as your rooks play on the square rather than not play at all.

_Enter_ LEONORE _masked, with a letter in her hand._

_Dap._ Come, the devil will not lose a gamester: here's ready money for you, push freely.

_Ran._ Thou art as well met as if by assignation. [_To_ LEONORE.

_Leo._ And you are as well met as if you were the man I looked for.

_Ran._ Kind rogue!

_Leo._ Sweet sir!

_Ran._ Come, I am thy prisoner, (without more words,) show but thy warrant. [_Goes to pull off her mask._

_Leo._ You mistake, sir; here is my pass. [_Gives him the letter._

_Ran._ A letter! and directed to me!

[_Reads._] "I cannot put up the injuries and affronts you did me last night;"--a challenge, upon my life! and by such a messenger!--"therefore conjure you by your honour, at eight o'clock precisely, this evening, to send your man to St. James's gate, to wait for me with a chair, to conduct me to what place you shall think most fit, for the giving of satisfaction to the injured--Christina."

Christina! I am amazed! What is it o'clock, Dapperwit?

_Dap._ It wants not half an hour of eight.

_Ran._ [_To_ LEONORE.] Go then back, my pretty herald, and tell my fair enemy the service she designs my man is only fit for my friend here; whose faith and honour she may be secure of. He shall immediately go wait for her at St James's gate, whilst I go to prepare a place for our rencounter, and myself to die at her feet. [_Exit_ LEONORE.] Dapperwit, dear Dapperwit.

_Dap._ What lucky surprisal's this?

_Ran._ Prithee ask no questions, till I have more leisure and less astonishment. I know you will not deny to be an instrument in my happiness.

_Dap._ No, let me perish! I take as much pleasure to bring lovers together as an old woman; or as a bankrupt gamester loves to look on, though he has no advantage by the play; or as a bully that fights not himself, yet takes pleasure to set people together by the ears, or as--

_Ran._ 'Sdeath! is this a time for similitudes?

_Dap._ You have made me miscarry of a good thought now, let me perish!

_Ran._ Go presently to St. James's gate, where you are to expect the coming of a lady ('tis Christina), accompanied by that woman you saw e'en now. She will permit you to put her into a chair, and then conduct her to my lodging; while I go before to remove some spies, and prepare it for her reception.

_Dap._ Your lodging? had you not better carry her to Vincent's? 'tis hard by; and there a vizard mask has as free egress and regress as at the playhouse.

_Ran._ Faith, though it be not very prudent, yet she shall come thither in my vindication; for he would not believe I had seen her last night.

_Dap._ To have a fine woman, and not tell on't as you say, Mr. Ranger--

_Ran._ Go, and bring her to Vincent's lodging; there I'll expect you. [_Exeunt severally._