Part 13

“When Chagla was through talking, the other old men said, ‘_hetchetu_,’ meaning it was so; and then Chagla held the stem of the pipe towards me.

“As I told you before, we boys had made a vow to dance and we had dedicated a pipe to Wakon Tonka. We were back home safe now with many horses and much honor. But I was afraid. This thing I had to do was _wakon_ and a fearful thing. I wished I had not made the vow, so that I could refuse the pipe. The four old men and my step-father and mother were all looking hard at me, but for a while I could not reach out and take the pipe. Then when Chagla began to draw it back towards him, all at once my heart leaped within me and I grasped the pipe and held it to my mouth; and the four old men said, ‘_hi-yay_.’ Then they went away.

“Now I had to dance, for I had made a vow and I had taken the pipe. I was not afraid any more. When the enemies are many and you are few, and it seems there is nothing to do but to die right there, you raise a death-song, and then you are not afraid of anything, because you are dead already, and what can hurt you? It was something like that with me.

“My step-father and mother were very proud of me when I came back with those Crow horses, and now they were still prouder because I was going to dance. So they made a feast and asked many to come. Many came to eat and they told my mother and step-father what a brave young man their son was, and maybe I would grow up to be a great chief.

“The dancing place was prepared, and the next thing was to find the _chun wakon_ [the sacred tree] which would stand in the center of the circle. It must be a tall slender cottonwood and everything had to be done just right. When I was young I heard the old men say why this was so. A long while ago--beyond so many snows and grasses that the oldest man’s grandfather and his grandfather before him, and his and his could not remember--there was a beautiful girl who was big with child. The child was a boy and would grow up to be a great _wichasha wakon_. And while he was still inside his mother, at the time when cherry seeds harden and the sun is strongest, he had a great vision about the sun dance, and everything was shown to him just as it should be. So when he became a young man he remembered his vision and taught the people. He was the first _owankara_, the first to prepare a sun dance. This is what the old men told when I was young.

“Four were chosen to go forth and find the _chun wakon_--two men and two women. Both men were great warriors and _wichasha yatapika_, and no bad thing could be said of them. They belonged to the Chante Tinza society [Strong Hearts]. The two women were mothers, neither young nor old, and they were always helping the sick and the needy, and no one among all the people could say anything but good of them. So these four went forth with axes to find the sacred cottonwood, and after them went young warriors wearing their war bonnets and painted as for war. Maybe the tree was a long way off; maybe it was near. But when it was found, standing tall and straight with a fork near the top, the young warriors charged upon it, crying, ‘_hoka-hey_,’ as in a battle, and couping the tree with their coup-sticks. When this was done, the two chosen men took their axes and struck the tree; and between strokes they told of brave deeds they had done. Then when the tree was cut more than halfway through, the two chosen women approached with their axes and chopped carefully, so that the tree did not fall all at once, but slowly; and as it fell it cried out as with great pain. When it was lying on the ground, four poles were placed under it and eight men lifted it so, placing the butt towards the quarter whence comes the sun, bringing light and wisdom and the peace that wisdom gives. Then the two women began chopping off all the branches, and only the two forks were left at the top. The young warriors now were riding fast back and forth between the sacred tree and the happy people, who were feasting; and to these they brought the news of the tree, telling all that the four chosen ones were doing. ‘They have found the _chun wakon_--they are chopping it--the tree has fallen--the women are cutting the limbs away,’ Every little thing the young warriors told the people, riding fast back and forth; and the people heard, crying, ‘_hi-yay_,’ and singing as for a victory.

“No one could touch the tree with hands, for it was _wakon_. When it was all ready to be brought home, eight men lifted it on the four poles, four men on each side. And four would change with another four, so that many brought it home. These walked slowly in a sacred manner; and as they walked, the young warriors rode fast back and forth between the holy tree and the happy people yonder, telling where it was now, and where now, and now. And the people heard, cheering and singing as for a great victory. When at last the _chun wakon_ had come in sight of home, one of the carriers, who was a great warrior and had counted many coups, raised a long howl the way a dog does when the moon is big, and the other carriers joined with him. Then all the people swarmed forth to meet the tree, singing together as they crowded about it, but not too close. You remember how the warriors at the wagon boxes were like a blooming mountain valley walking; but those were singing the death-song. Now the happy people were singing to the Ever-Living One, and they were all blooming--the girls and women with flowers braided into their hair, and the men with their war bonnets.

“So the _chun wakon_ came home. The carriers placed the tree in the center of the dancing ring with its butt pointing to where the sun comes up; and there a hole had been dug for the planting. But before it was planted, Blue Spotted Horse, the old holy man--the same who prepared me for my vision quest--came to paint the tree. First he prayed to the Six Powers, as he had taught me, and then he took red paint that he had made by mixing red clay with bison tallow, and painted from the top down to the butt, so that the whole tree was bright with the sacred color. And as he painted the _chun wakon_, all the people sat round about in a great circle and watched, and there was no sound; and the sun watched too.

“Next Chagla came with a bundle of chokecherry branches which must be tied in the crotch of the tree. No chokecherries were growing in the country where we were, so a band of young warriors had been sent all the way to Mini Shoshay [the Missouri] to fetch the branches. Below these the bundle of offerings must be tied. It was a pouch made of buffalo skin, and inside were all kinds of little things the people had brought--locks of hair, little pieces of their own flesh, sinew for sewing and bone needles, rings, beads, and many other little things that the people might think of giving so that the sacred power might not forget them; and last of all a flint, an arrow, and a gun were placed in the bundle. Before he tied these bundles in their places with thongs of bison hide, Chagla prayed; holding his pipe towards the sun, stem forward. And when he had prayed, he told the people about a vision that had come to him. It was the vision that had commanded him to prepare the dance for the good of the people, that they might be a nation and live to see their children flourish, and their children’s children. Last of all, before the tree was planted, Chagla took a piece of buffalo tallow and dropped it in the hole. It was the gift to Maka [earth], the mother of all living things, the only mother, she who has shown mercy to her children.

“Next, long thongs of buffalo hide were tied to the top of the tree, and when the carriers had raised the tree on forked poles and set the butt upon the hole, young warriors pulled upon the thongs and the tree arose until it dropped into the hole. Then all the people cried out together with one voice, rejoicing.

“So the sacred tree was planted. And the sun went down.

“All the while these things were being done, we who were going to dance had to wait in a big lodge that had been made for us, and when the tree had come home, our attendants told us everything that was being done out there, and we could hear Blue Spotted Horse and Chagla praying. When the people cried out with one voice, we knew the tree was planted. We had all gone through the sweat bath, as I did before my vision quest; and afterwards we were rubbed with the sacred sage and painted red all over with the sacred paint. We could hear the happy people outside and what the young warriors cried to them about the preparing and coming of the tree. High Horse, Kicking Bear, and Charging Cat were in there too, because the four of us had dedicated the pipe and made the vow together the way I told you. But we could not go outside and be seen until it was time to dance. What I have told you is what I have seen many times when I did not dance.

“It was night now. Before we slept they gave us some food and water, and that was the last that we could have until our vows were fulfilled. It was not long before there was snoring all around me, but it was hard for me to go to sleep. Maybe I was a little afraid. Sometimes I would hold my breath because something might happen all at once. When the snoring stopped, now and then, the big night outside held its breath too, waiting for something. Maybe a voice would roar all at once, as when I stole my grandfather’s pipe and the thunder beings scolded. Kicking Bear was lying on one side of me and High Horse on the other. Next to High Horse was Charging Cat. I could hear Kicking Bear and Charging Cat breathing deep, as though nothing was going to happen, and I wondered if maybe I was a coward after all. Then I remembered how my heart sang when we were driving the Crow herd away from the village that night. I was not a coward then. Afterwhile I knew that High Horse was not sleeping either. He would turn over and then turn back; and when he was still for a while I could feel he was awake yet. That made me feel better, because I knew he was brave. After we had lain there awake for a long while, he put his mouth close to my ear and whispered: ‘Brother, are you awake?’ And I answered, whispering: ‘Yes, brother, I cannot go to sleep.’ He was still for a while, and then he whispered: ‘She _was_ funny, wasn’t she--the fat old woman--the way she bounced?’ Then we put our arms around each other and lay close together, snickering like little boys.

“Suddenly someone was shaking me by the shoulder, saying: ‘Get up! It is time!’ Then I knew that the attendants were waking the dancers, and I had been sleeping deep.

“It was still dark. They told us to put on our skirts of bison fur, and that is all we wore--not even moccasins. Then they led us outside into the still, starry night. Some people were moving like shadows among the tepees and some were coming towards the dancing ring.”

The old man ceased speaking and fell into a reverie, blowing softly the while on his eagle-bone whistle, highly polished by years of thumbing.

“I had this in my hand,” he said at length. “Chagla gave it to me. I also carried a pipe. The stem was wrapped with colored porcupine quills up to the mouthpiece, and that was covered with the green skin of a mallard. They led us through the opening of the dancing ring, and I was first because I had taken the scalp. Next came High Horse, Kicking Bear, and Charging Cat, because of all those Crow horses and the victory. There were about thirty other dancers.

“As I entered, they gave me a buffalo skull to carry because I was the principal dancer. We went around the ring from left to right, which is walking in a sacred manner, and stopped facing the place where the sun comes up. I put the skull down in front of me with the nose to the coming day. Low down at the rim of earth yonder was a faint streak of light. The morning star was big and bright and still. As I gazed at it, I wanted to cry, but I could feel something like wings lifting me too. It was the same way the star looked down at me that time after I dreamed beneath my father’s scaffold and heard him tell me always to be kind to old people and never to be afraid of anything. Then the drummers began singing to the coming sun, and their drumsticks, with bison tails fastened on the ends, made a slapping sound.”

The old man ceased. Getting to his feet with some difficulty, he danced feebly, keeping time with drums long silent and blowing on his whistle pointed towards no earthly dawn. “So!” he said at length with a little cackling laugh and panting like a runner. “_Washtay!_ It was good. But I cannot dance very well any more. There is no strength in what I eat these days.”

Seated again, he waited until normal breathing was restored, and then:

“We danced to the drums and the singing, and I stared at the place where the sky was getting white. Sometimes I could not feel the ground at all, for something seemed to lift me and it was like floating on drumbeats and singing. Then suddenly the great round sun leaped yellow and glaring over the edge of the world, and all the people cried out together with one voice.

“The singing and drumming stopped now, and they led us dancers back to the sacred tree, placing us in a circle around it. I had the bison skull in front of me. Chagla told me I must put it in a certain place that was prepared near the tree. There was a heap of white clay, and into this I thrust the skull three times. The fourth time I pushed it deep and left it there. So Maka’s sacred gift of the bison to the people was given back to the giver with thanks. Also at that place there were two forked sticks in the ground with another stick lying across. Against this I must set my pipe with the stem pointed up. This was a gift to Wakon Tonka and the life-giving sun.

“The drums and the singing began again, and we danced with our faces to the blazing sun, holding our whistles in our mouths and blowing upon them in time with the dancing. Somebody was talking close to my ear, and it was Chagla. ‘Do not look directly at the sun,’ he said; ‘look just a little below.’ I tried to do that, but it did not help much at first, it was like white-hot knives in my eyes. After a while I did not feel anything, and it was dark. The drumbeats and the singing seemed far away in empty night, and they lifted me, floating alone. I was lost in the blindness of my eyes, and I kept praying in my mind in time with the whistle and the far-off drums, ‘Let me see, let me see!’

“I did not see anything. Then all at once, I could see everything, and far away was near. There was a wide green land; wide, wide, green, green, with hills and valleys and streams glittering bright. And the sky over it was deeper and wider and bluer than I can say. It was the same land I saw when I dreamed under the scaffold and my father came to me on his spirit horse. The drumbeats and singing were dim and far away--more like remembering than hearing. I was looking hard at a hilltop for a horseback to come out of the sky. Then someone shook me by the shoulder, and I knew it was Chagla.

“The drums and singing were still. This world came back slowly out of the dark. I was looking down at my shadow. It was right under me like a puddle. Then I was very thirsty, but I made myself remember the green land and the glittering streams, and when I could do that, I forgot I was thirsty.

“All the people were around us in a crowd, watching us while they feasted; but when I thought about eating, it was water that I wanted. Also while the people were watching and eating, the relatives of the dancers were giving away many things--horses and fine clothing, beaded work, and maybe tepees; for giving is a sacred deed and is pleasing to the Mysterious One who gives everything.

“Chagla took my pipe from where I had placed it, and told me I should give it to one of the singers and drummers. So I went to a man, and when he held out his hands I spread his fingers and pretended to give him the pipe. Three times he tried to grasp it, but I pulled it away. The fourth time, I let him seize it. Others were doing the same with other drummers and singers.

“The high sun was burning hot. The attendants came now and rubbed us all over with sacred sage until the red paint was gone and our skins were dry. Then they painted us again. They made my body yellow for the power to grow. Then they took some blue paint made from clay we used to get at Rawhide Buttes. With this my arms were painted from the elbows down, and my legs below the knees. The blue was for the power of the quarter where the sun goes down, the power to make live and to destroy, the power of the Thunder Beings and the rain. With these powers to help me, I would grow to be a great warrior; also a helper of the people, for the hoop of the people and the shielding tree belong to the yellow quarter. When they had done this, they painted something on my back, and it was a half-moon. They did not paint a new moon, because that would have meant going down to the spiritland beyond where the days of man end; and I was to grow in this world and be a great warrior.

“While they were painting us the drummers sang about it like this.” The old man lifted a cracked, quavering voice, drumming on one hand with the other:

“‘Father, paint the earth on me. A nation I will make over. A two-legged nation I will make holy. Father, paint the earth on me.’

“Last of all, they fastened strips of bison-hide around my wrists and ankles, that the strength of the bison might be mine.

“I was then told to get my pipe back and place it again where I had placed it in the morning. The man held it in front of him with both hands, and when I reached for it he pulled it away. Three times he did this. Then I placed both of my hands on the top of his head and brought them slowly down along his neck and shoulders and arms. That was the fourth time I reached for the pipe, and he let me take it, saying, ‘_palamo yelo_ [thanks].’ Then I placed it against the cross-stick again, with the stem pointing upward. While I was doing this, other dancers were doing the same thing, and so the singers shared in the gift to the Ever-Living One. The power fell on them too, and drew us all closer together.

“Blue Spotted Horse came and pierced the flesh on the breasts of two of the dancers, and through the cut on each he tied the end of one of the rawhide thongs that were fastened to the top of the sacred tree. When he did this, the two dancers only stared at the sun. They did not move; they did not make a sound. I had vowed secretly to do this on the fourth day, and I wondered if I could be as brave as they were.

“Now the drumming and singing began again. I saw the two dancers, with pierced breasts, lean back against the thongs with blood running down their bellies. Then we all began dancing with our eyes to the blazing sun. I did not see them after that, for the hot light stabbed my eyes and the blindness came back quickly. I heard later that one of them fainted when the sun was getting low, and there he hung from the tree until his father had him cut down. But he danced again next day, after the holy men had fixed his wound and he had slept. The other one leaned so hard upon the thong that he soon pulled it through the flesh. After the holy men had washed the wound and put medicine in it, he danced until night.

“I saw nothing. In the darkness of my eyes I floated alone on the drumbeats and the singing, and as I floated I prayed, ‘Let me see! Let me see!’ I wanted to get back to the wide green land and the sparkling streams; but I saw nothing. Someone came and put a piece of slippery bark into my mouth. I think it was Chagla. I chewed on this, and it made my mouth feel better. I went on dancing and praying in the darkness, ‘Let me see again! Let me see!’ All at once I did see, and I was not thirsty any more. It was the same wide green land under the wide blue sky. It was beautiful, but it was empty. I looked and looked, but there were no people, and no horseback came out of the sky. When the far-off drums and singing stopped, and this world came back, the sun was down, and the night was coming.

“I dropped down where I was, and I must have gone to sleep right away. Then someone was shaking me by the shoulder, and I thought I heard my father saying, ‘Hold fast! There is more!’ But when I was awake, it was one of the attendants who were waking the dancers. It was still dark, but there were stars. The sky was fading a little over where the sun comes up. People were moving about in the starlight yonder. When I stood up and looked at the morning star, a power went through me and I felt good. I was not heavy at all. I felt very strong. Blue Spotted Horse was praying. There was no sound but his voice raised high. He prayed that the nation might live. To the Six Powers he prayed and to the coming sun, and the morning star looked and listened. Then the drumming began and the singing. It was the sun singing while it came up out of the night yonder:

“‘With visible face I am appearing. In a sacred manner I appear. For the greening earth a pleasantness I make. The center of the nation’s hoop I have made pleasant. With visible face behold me! The four-leggeds and two-leggeds, I have made them to walk. The wings of the air, I have made them to fly. The finned of the streams, I have made them to swim. The rooted ones, I have made them to rise. With visible face, behold, I appear! My day, I have made it holy.’

“The morning star went out and the sun blazed over the edge of the earth. The blindness came. I prayed hard, ‘Let me see!’ I danced hard, like a homesick runner going home. The blindness did not go away. The darkness was burning hot. It pressed down upon me with great power. I did not float on the drumbeats and the singing. I worked hard to keep on dancing. My tongue was a stranger in my mouth. It was hard to blow upon my eagle-bone whistle. I kept on trying to pray and to remember, ‘Hold fast, there is more.’ I held fast, but I could not see. Someone put the slippery bark into my mouth. It was not easy to chew, but it helped a little. That day, it was like dancing always, but I held fast; and the drums stopped and the singing. I slept there on the ground, and had bad dreams about rivers too far off to reach, or they were not there when I came to where I saw them.

“The third day was harder, and it was very hot. I could not see, and my tongue filled my mouth. Afterwards I heard that five of the dancers fell down that day and could not get up. They had to be carried out. Charging Cat was one of them; but High Horse and Kicking Bear went through. I prayed to see, but it was only words. I kept on dancing because I remembered, ‘Hold fast, there is more!’

“That night I dreamed of crawling around in the dark trying to find water. Afterwhile I heard a voice, and I knew it was my father. I could not see him, but his voice was like a wind out in the night, everywhere, nowhere: ‘Let your heart be strong--it is nearly finished--you will see--you will see!’

“Then the attendant was shaking me awake.

“It was going to be the last day. When I got up from the ground, my body felt dead and it was hard to lift. But when I looked at the morning star above the pale streak yonder, my father’s words seemed to fill the hollow world that listened, and a power ran through me stronger than ever before. While a holy man was praying, the power in me grew; and when the drums began and the singers sang, my heart sang too.

“‘See where the sacred sun is walking! In the blue robe of morning he is walking, With his power greenward walking, _Hey-o-ha, hey-o-ha_ _Hey-o-ha, hey-o-ha_.’