SCENE V.

_Enter +Captain Quartfield+ beating +Roseclap+; +Salewit+ and +Millicent+ labouring to part them._

+Quart.+ Sirrah, I'll beat you into air.

+Rose.+ Good captain!

+Quart.+ I will, by Hector.

+Rose.+ Murder, murder, help!

+Quart.+ You needy, shifting, cosening, breaking slave.

+Mil.+ Nay, Master Salewit, help to part 'em.

+Sale.+ Captain!

+Quart.+ Ask me for money? dog!

+Rose.+ O, I am kill'd!

+Mil.+ Help, help!

+Sale.+ Nay, captain.

+Quart.+ Men of my coat pay!

+Mil.+ I'll call in neighbours. Murder, murder!

+Quart.+ Rascal, I'll make you trust, and offer me petitions To go o' th' score.

+Rose.+ Good: 'tis very good.

+Mil.+ How does thy head, sweetheart?

+Rose.+ Away, be quiet, Millicent.

+Sale.+ Roseclap, you'll never leave this: I did tell you, Last time the captain beat you, what a lion He is, being ask'd for reckonings.

+Mil.+ So you did, Indeed, good Master Salewit; yet you must Ever be foolish, husband.

+Sale.+ What if we Do owe you money, sir; is't fit for you To ask it?

+Rose.+ Well, Sir, There Is Law. I Say No more, but there is law.

+Quart.+ What law, you cur? The law of nature, custom, arms, and nations, Frees men of war from payments.

+Rose.+ Yes, your arms, captain; none else.

+Quart.+ No soldiers ought to pay.

+Sale.+ Nor poets: All void of money are privileged.

+Mil.+ What would you have? Captains and poets, Master Salewit says, Must never pay.

+Sale.+ No, nor be ask'd for money.

+Rose.+ Still, I say, there is law.

+Quart.+ Say that again, And, by Bellona, I will cut thy throat.

+Mil.+ You long to see your brains out.

+Quart.+ Why, you mongrel, You John-of-all-trades, have we been your guests Since you first kept a tavern; when you had The face and impudence to hang a bush Out to three pints of claret, two of sack, In all the world?

+Sale.+ After that, when you broke, Did we here find you out, custom'd your house, And help'd away your victuals, which had else Lain mouldy on your hands?

+Rose.+ You did indeed, And never paid for't. I do not deny, But you have been my customers these two years; My jack went not, nor chimney smok'd without you. I will go farther; your two mouths have been Two as good eating mouths as need to come Within my doors; as curious to be pleased, As if you still had eaten with ready money; Had still the meats in season; still drank more Than your ordinary came to.

+Sale.+ And your conscience now Would have this paid for?

+Rose.+ Surely, so I take it.

+Sale.+ Was ever the like heard?

+Quart.+ 'Tis most unreasonable; He has a harden'd conscience. Sirrah cheater, You would be question'd for your reckonings, rogue.

+Rose.+ Do you inform?

+Quart.+ I hear one o' th' sheriffs Paid for the boiling of a carp a mark.

+Sale.+ Most unheard-of exactions!

+Rose.+ Yet surely, captain, No man had cheaper reckonings than yourself And Master Salewit here.

+Quart.+ How cheap?

+Rose.+ I say No more, good captain; not to pay is cheap, A man would think.

+Quart.+ Sir, don't you reckon air, And make it dear to breathe in your house, and put The nose to charges?

+Rose.+ Right; perfum'd air, captain.

+Quart.+ Is not the standing of the salt an item, And placing of the bread?

+Rose.+ A new way, captain.

+Quart.+ Is not the folding of your napkins brought Into the bill?

+Rose.+ Pinch'd napkins, captain, and laid Like fishes, fowls, or faces.

+Sale.+ Then remember How you rate salads, Roseclap; one may buy Gardens as cheap.

+Rose.+ Yes, Master Salewit, salads Taken from Euclid, made in diagrams, And to be eaten in figures.

+Quart.+ And we must pay for your inventions, sir?

+Rose.+ Or you are damn'd: Good captain, you have sworn to pay this twelvemonth.

+Quart.+ Peace! you loud, bawling cur; do you disgrace me Before these gallants? See if I don't kill you.