SCENE I.--_A long Street.

JULIO _enters from a Garden Gate in flat, with precipitation; a_ SERVANT, _within, fastens the Gate_.

_Julio._ Yes, yes, bar the gate fast, Cerberus, lest some other curious traveller should stumble on your confines.--If ever I am so caught again--

GARCIA _enters_ L.; _going hastily across_, JULIO _seizes him_.

Don Garcia, never make love to a woman in a veil.

_Gar._ Why so, pr'ythee? Veils and secrecy are the chief ingredients in a Spanish amour; but in two years, Julio, thou art grown absolutely French.

_Julio._ That may be; but if ever I trust to a veil again, may no lovely, blooming beauty ever trust me. Why dost know, I have been an hour at the feet of a creature, whose first birth-day must have been kept the latter end of the last century, and whose trembling, weak voice, I mistook for the timid cadence of bashful fifteen!

_Gar._ Ha! ha! ha! What a happiness to have seen thee in thy raptures, petitioning for half a glance only, of the charms the envious veil concealed!

_Julio._ Yes; and when she unveiled her Gothic countenance, to render the thing completely ridiculous, she began moralizing; and positively would not let me out of the snare, till I had persuaded her she had worked a conversion, and that I'd never make love--but in an honest way, again.

_Gar._ Oh, that honest way of love-making is delightful, to be sure! I had a dose of it this morning; but, happily, the ladies have not yet learned to veil their tempers, though they have their faces.

_Enter_ DON VINCENTIO, R.

_Vin._ Julio! Garcia! congratulate me!--Such an escape! [_Crosses to_ C.

_Julio._ What have you escaped?

_Vin._ Matrimony.

_Gar._ Nay, then our congratulations may be mutual. I have had a matrimonial escape too, this very day. I was almost on the brink of the ceremony with the veriest Xantippe!

_Vin._ Oh, that was not my case--mine was a sweet creature, all elegance, all life.

_Julio._ Then where's the cause of congratulation?

_Vin._ Cause! why she's ignorant of music! prefers a jig to a canzonetta, and a Jew's-harp to a pentachord.

_Gar._ Had my nymph no other fault, I would pardon that, for she was lovely and rich.

_Vin._ Mine, too, was lovely and rich; and, I'll be sworn, as ignorant of scolding, as of the gamba!--but not to know music!

_Julio._ Gentle, lovely, and rich! and ignorant only of music?

_Gar._ A venial crime indeed! if the sweet creature will marry me, she shall carry a Jew's-harp always in her train, as a Scotch laird does his bagpipes. I wish you'd give me your interest.

_Vin._ Oh, most willingly, if thou hast so gross an inclination; I'll name thee as a dull-souled, largo fellow, to her father, Don Cæsar.

_Gar._ Cæsar! what Don Cæsar?

_Vin._ De Zuniga.

_Gar._ Impossible!

_Vin._ Oh, I'll answer for her mother. So much is Don Zuniga, her father, that he does not know a semibreve from a culverin!

_Gar._ The name of the lady?

_Vin._ Olivia.

_Gar._ Why you must be mad--that's my termagant!

_Vin._ Termagant!--ha! ha! ha! Thou hast certainly some vixen of a mistress, who infects thy ears towards the whole sex. Olivia is timid and elegant.

_Gar._ By Juno, there never existed such a scold!

_Vin._ By Orpheus, there never was a gayer tempered creature!--Spirit enough to be charming, that's all. If she loved harmony, I'd marry her to-morrow.

_Julio._ Ha! ha! what a ridiculous jangle! 'Tis evident you speak of two different women.

_Gar._ I speak of Donna Olivia, heiress to Don Cæsar de Zuniga.

_Vin._ I speak of the heiress of Don Cæsar de Zuniga, who is called Donna Olivia.

_Gar._ Sir, I perceive you mean to insult me.

_Vin._ Your perceptions are very rapid, sir, but if you choose to think so, I'll settle that point with you immediately: But for fear of consequences, I'll fly home, and add the last bar to my concerto, and then meet you where you please. [_Crosses_, L.

_Julio._ Pho! this is evidently misapprehension. [_Crosses_, C.] To clear the matter up, I'll visit the lady, if you'll introduce me, Vincentio;--but you shall both promise to be governed in this dispute, by my decision.

_Vin._ I'll introduce you with joy, if you'll try to persuade her of the necessity of music, and the charms of harmony.

_Gar._ Yes, she needs that----You'll find her all jar and discord.

_Julio._ Come, no more, Garcia; thou art but a sort of male vixen thyself. Melodious Vincentio, when shall I expect you?

_Vin._ This evening.

_Julio._ Not this evening; I have engaged to meet a goldfinch in a grove--then I shall have music, you rogue!

_Vin._ It won't sing at night.

_Julio._ Then I'll talk to it till the morning, and hear it pour out its matins to the rising sun. Call on me to-morrow; I'll then attend you to Donna Olivia, and declare faithfully the impression her character makes on me.--Come, Garcia, I must not leave you together, lest his crotchets and your minums should fall into a crash of discords. [_Exeunt_, VINCENTIO, L., JULIO _and_ GARCIA, R.