Chapter 31

RE-ENTER _Euclio_ FROM HOUSE.

_Eucl._

Nunc defaecato demum animo egredior domo, postquam perspexi salva esse intus omnia. 80 redi nunciam intro atque intus serva.

(_aside_) At last I can feel easy about leaving the house, now I have made certain everything is all right inside. (_to Staphyla_) Go back in there this instant, you, and keep watch inside.

_Staph._

Quippini? ego intus servem? an ne quis aedes auferat? nam hic apud nos nihil est aliud quaesti furibus, ita inaniis sunt oppletae atque araneis.

(_tartly_) I suppose so! So I’m to keep watch inside, am I? You aren’t afraid anyone’ll walk away with the house, are you? I vow we’ve got nothing else there for thieves to take-- all full of emptiness as it is, and cobwebs.

_Eucl._

Mirum quin tua me causa faciat Iuppiter Philippum regem aut Dareum, trivenefica araneas mihi ego illas servari volo. pauper sum, fateor, patior, quod di dant fero.

It is surprising Providence wouldn’t make a King Philip or Darius of me for your benefit, you viper, you! (_threateningly_) I want those cobwebs watched! I’m poor, poor; I admit it, I put up with it; I take what the gods give me.

abi intro, occlude ianuam. iam ego hic ero cave quemquam alienum in aedis intro miseris 90 quod quispiam ignem quaerat, extingui volo, ne causae quid sit quod te quisquam quaeritet nam si ignis vivet, ut extinguere extempulo.

In with you, bolt the door. I shall be back soon. No outsider is to be let in, mind you. And in case anyone should be looking for a light, see you put the fire out so that no one will have any reason to come to you for it. Mark my words, if that fire stays alive, I’ll extinguish you instantly.

tum aquam aufugisse dicito, si quis petet. cultrum, securim, pistillum, mortarium, quae utenda vasa semper vicini rogant, fures venisse atque abstulisse dicito profecto in aedis meas me absente neminem volo intro mitti. atque etiam hoc praedico tibi si Bona Fortuna veniat, ne intro miseris 100

And then water--if anyone asks for water, tell him it’s all run out. As for a knife, or an axe, or a pestle, or a mortar,--things the neighbours are all the time wanting to borrow--tell ’em burglars got in and stole the whole lot. I won’t have a living soul let into my house while I’m agone--there! Yes, and what’s more, listen here, if Dame Fortune herself comes along, don’t you let her in.

_Staph._

Pol ea ipsa credo ne intro mittatur cavet, nam ad aedis nostras numquam adit, quamquam prope est.

Goodness me, she won’t get in: she’ll see to that herself, I fancy. Why, she never comes to our house at all, no matter how near she is.

_Eucl._

Tace atque abi intro.

Keep still and go inside. (_advances on her_)

_Staph._

Taceo atque abeo.

(_hurrying out of reach_) I’m still, sir, I’m going!

_Eucl._

Occlude sis fores ambobus pessulis. iam ego hic ero.

Mind you lock the door, both bolts. I’ll soon be back. [EXIT _Staphyla_ INTO HOUSE.

discrucior animi, quia ab domo abeundum est mihi. nimis hercle invitus abeo. sed quid agam scio. nam noster nostrae qui est magister curiae dividere argenti dixit nummos in viros, id si relinquo ac non peto, omnes ilico me suspicentur, credo habere aurum domi. 110 nam non est veri simile, hominem pauperem pauxillum parvi facere quin nummum petat.

It’s agony having to leave the house, downright agony. Oh my God, how I do hate to go! But I have my reasons. The director of our ward gave notice he was going to make us a present of two shillings a man; and the minute I let it pass without putting in my claim, they’d all be suspecting I had gold at home, I’m sure they would. No, it doesn’t look natural for a poor man to think so little of even a tiny bit of money as not to go ask for his two shillings.

nam nunc cum celo sedulo omnis, ne sciant, omnes videntur scire et me benignius omnes salutant quam salutabant prius; adeunt, consistunt, copulantur dexteras, rogitant me ut valeam, quid agam, quid rerum geram. nunc quo profectus sum ibo; postidea domum me rursum quantum potero tantum recipiam.

Why, even now, hard as I try to keep every one from finding out, it seems as if every one knew: it seems as if every one has a heartier way of saying good day than they used to. Up they come, and stop, and shake hands, and keep asking me how I’m feeling, and how I’m getting on, and what I’m doing. Well, I must get along to where I’m bound; and then I’ll come back home just as fast as I possibly can. [EXIT _Euclio_

ACTVS II