Chapter 149

2. This life is not only imputed to him that is wrought on by the Spirit of Grace—that is, not only counted his, but also there is put into the soul an understanding, enlightened on purpose to know the things of God, which is Christ and His imputed righteousness (1 John 5:20) which it never thought of nor understood before (1 Cor 2:9-11). Which understanding being enlightened and made to see such things that the soul cannot be contented without it lay hold of and apply Christ unto itself so effectually; I say, that the soul shall be exceedingly revived in a very heavenly measure with the application of this imputed righteousness; for thereby it knoweth it shall find God speaking peace to itself, with a fatherly affection, saying, “Be of good cheer, thy sins are forgiven thee”; the righteousness of My Son I bestow upon thee; “For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through thee,” thy “flesh,” “I have sent forth My only Son, and have condemned” thy sins in His flesh (Rom 8:3). And though thou hast gone astray like a lost sheep, yet on Him I have laid thine iniquities; and though thou thereby didst undo and break thyself for ever, yet by His stripes I have healed thee. Thus, I say, the Lord causeth the soul by faith to apply that which He doth by grace impute unto it, for thus every soul more or less is dealt withal; the soul being thus enlightened, thus quickened, thus made alive from that dead state it was in before, or at least having the beginnings of this life, it hath these several virtuous advantages, which they have not that are dead in their sins and trespasses, and under the law—

[Advantages possessed by the quickened].

First. It seeth what a sad condition all men by nature are in, they being in that state which itself was in but a while since; but now by grace it is a beginning to scrabble 19 out of it; now it seeth “the whole world lieth in wickedness,” and so liable to eternal vengeance, because of their wickedness (1 John 5:19). Ah, friends, let me tell you, though you may be ignorant of your state and condition, yet the poor, groaning, hungering saints of God do see what a sad, woeful, miserable state you are in, which sometimes makes them tremble to think of your most lamentable latter end, your dying so, and also to fly the faster to their Lord Jesus, for very fear that they also should be partakers of that most doleful doom. [Like as the children of Israel, who fled for fear when the ground opened its mouth to swallow up Korah and his company]. And this it hath by virtue of its own experience, knowing itself was but awhile ago in the same condition, under the same condemnation. O! there is now a hearth blessing of God that ever He should show to it its sad condition, and that He should incline its heart to seek after a better condition. O blessed be the Lord! saith the soul, that ever He should awaken me, stir up me, and bring me out of that sad condition that I once with them was in (Psa 103:1-3). It makes also the soul to wonder to see how foolishly and vainly the rest of its neighbours do spend their precious time, that they should be so void of understanding, so forgetful of their latter end, so senseless of the damning nature of their sins. O that their eyes were but enlightened to see whereabouts they are! surely they would be of another mind than they are now in. Now, the soul wonders to see what slender pins those poor creatures do hang the stress of the eternal salvation of their souls upon. O! methinks, saith the soul, it makes me mourn to see that some should think that they were born Christians; and others, that their baptism makes them so; 20 others depend barely upon a traditional, historical faith, which will leave their souls in the midst of perplexity. That they should trust to such fables, fancies, and wicked sleights of the devil, as their good doings, their good thinkings, their civil walking and living with the world. O miserable profession, and the end thereof will be a miserable end!

But now, when the soul is thus wrought upon, it must be sure to look for the very gates of Hell to be set open against it with all their force and might to destroy it. Now Hell rageth, the devil roareth, and all the world resolveth to do the best they can to bring the soul again into bondage and ruin. Also, the soul shall not want enemies, even in its own heart’s lust, [But this is but for the exercise of his faith.] as covetousness, adultery, blasphemy, unbelief, hardness of heart, coldness, half-heartedness, ignorance, with an innumerable company of attendants, hanging, like so many blocks, at its heels, ready to sink it into the fire of Hell every moment, together with strange apprehensions of God and Christ, as if now they were absolutely turned to be its enemies, which maketh it doubt of the certainty of its salvation; for you must understand, that though a soul may in reality have the righteousness of the Son of God imputed to it, and also some faith in a very strong manner to lay hold upon it, yet at another time, through temptation, they may fear and doubt again, insomuch that the soul may be put into a very great fear lest it should return again into the condition it once was in (Jer 32:40). O, saith the soul, when I think of my former state, how miserable it was, it makes me tremble; and when I think that I may fall into that condition again, how sad are the thoughts of it to me! I would not be in that condition again for all the world. And this fear riseth still higher and higher, as the soul is sensible of Satan’s temptations, or of the working of its own corruptions. Ah! these filthy lusts, these filthy corruptions. O that I were rid of them, that they were consumed in a moment, that I could be quite rid of them, they do so disturb my soul, dishonour my God, so defile my conscience, and sometimes so weaken my hands in the way of God, and my comforts in the Lord; O how glad should I be if I might be stripped of them (Rom 7:24). Which fear puts the soul upon flying to the Lord by prayer for the covering of His imputed righteousness, and for strength against the devil’s temptations and its own corruptions; that God would give down His Holy Spirit to strengthen it against the things that do so annoy its soul, and so discourage it in its way, with a resolution, through grace, never to be contented while [until] it doth find in itself a triumphing over it, by faith in the blood of a crucified Jesus.

Second. The soul that hath been thus killed by the Law to the things it formerly delighted in, now, O now, it cannot be contented with that slender, groundless faith and hope that once it contented itself withal. No, no; but now it must be brought into the right saving knowledge of Jesus Christ, now it must have Him discovered to the soul by the Spirit, now it cannot be satisfied because such and such do tell it is so. No; but now it will cry out, Lord, show me continually, in the light of Thy Spirit, through Thy Word, that Jesus that was born in the days of Caesar Augustus, when Mary, a daughter of Judah, went with Joseph to be taxed at Bethlehem, that He is the very Christ. Lord, let me see it in the light of Thy Spirit, and in the operation thereof; and let me not be contented without such a faith that is so wrought even by the discovery of His birth, crucifying, death, blood, resurrection, ascension, intercession, and second—which is His personal—coming again, that the very faith of it may fill my soul with comfort and holiness. And O, how afraid the soul is lest it should fall short of this faith, and of the hope that is begotten by such discoveries as these are! For the soul knoweth that if it hath not this, it will not be able to stand either in death or judgment; and therefore, saith the soul, Lord, whatever other poor souls content themselves withal, let me have that which will stand me in stead, and carry me through a dangerous world; that may help me to resist a cunning devil; that may help me to suck true soul-satisfying consolation from Jesus Christ through Thy promises, by the might and power of Thy Spirit. And now, when the poor soul at any time hath any discovery of the love of God through a bleeding, dying, risen, interceding Jesus, because it is not willing to be deceived, O, how wary [But this may be its temptation, taking place through the timorousness of the soul.] is it of closing with it, for fear it should not be right, for fear it should not come from God! Saith the soul, Cannot the devil give one such comfort I trow? Cannot he transform himself thus into an angel of light? So that the soul, because that it would be upon a sure ground, cries out, Lord, show me Thy salvation, and that not once or twice, but, Lord, let me have Thy presence continually upon my heart, today, and tomorrow, and every day. For the soul, when it is rightly brought from under the Covenant of Works, and planted into the Covenant of Grace, then it cannot be, unless it be under some desperate temptation, contented without the presence of God, teaching, comforting, establishing, and helping of the soul to grow in the things of the Lord Jesus Christ; because it knoweth that if God hath but withdrawn His presence in any way from it, as He doth do sometimes for a while, that then the devil will be sure to be near at hand, working with his temptations, trying all ways to get the soul into slavery and sin again; also the corrupt principle, that will be joining and combining with the Wicked One, and will be willing to be a co-partner with him to bring the soul into mischief; which puts a soul upon an earnest, continual panting after more of the strengthening, preserving, comforting, and teaching presence of God, and for strong supplies of faith, that it may effectually lay hold on him.

Third. The soul is quickened so that it is not satisfied now without it do in deed and in truth partake of the peace of God’s elect; now it is upon the examination of the reality of its joy and peace. Time was indeed that anything would serve its turn, any false conceits of its state to be good; but now all kind of peace will not serve its turn, all kind of joy will not be accepted with it; now it must joy in God through Jesus Christ; now its peace must come through the virtues of the blood of Christ speaking peace to the conscience by taking away both the guilt and filth of sin by that blood; also by showing the soul its free acceptance with God through Christ, He hath completely fulfilled all the conditions of the first covenant, and freely placed it into the safety of what He hath done, and so presents the soul complete and spotless in the sight of God through His obedience. Now, I say, he hath “peace through the blood of His Cross,” and sees himself reconciled to God by the death of His Son, or else his comfort will be questioned by him (Col 1:20,21). It is not every promise as cometh now upon his heart that will serve his turn, no, but he must see whether the babe Jesus be presented to the soul in and through that promise. Now if the babe leap in his womb, as I may so say, it is because the Lord’s promise sounds aloud in his heart, coming to him big with the love and pardoning grace of God in Jesus Christ; I say, this is the first and principal joy that the soul hath that is quickened and brought into the Covenant of Grace.

Fourth. Now the man finds heavenly sanctification wrought in his soul through the most precious blood of the Man whose name is Jesus Christ—“Jesus, that He might sanctify the people with His own blood, suffered without the gate.” Now the soul finds a change in the understanding, in the will, in the mind, in the affections, in the judgment, and also in the conscience; through the inward man a change, and through the outward man a change, from head to foot, as we use to say, “for he that is in Christ,” and so in this Covenant of Grace, “is a new creature,” or hath been twice made—made, and made again (2 Cor 5:17). O, now the soul is resolved for Heaven and Glory; now it crieth out, Lord, if there be a right eye that is offensive to Thee, pluck it out; or a right foot, cut it off; or a right hand, take it from me. Now the soul doth begin to study how it may honour God, and bring praise to Him. Now the soul is for a preparation for the second coming of Christ, endeavouring to lay aside everything that may hinder; and for the closing in with those things that may make it in a beloved posture against that day.

Fifth. And all this is from a Gospel spirit, and not from a legal, natural principle, for the soul hath these things as the fruits and effects of its being separated unto the Covenant of Grace, and so now possessed with that Spirit that doth attend, yea, and dwell in them that are brought into the Covenant of Grace from under the old covenant; I say, these things do spring forth in the soul from another root and stock than any of the actings of other men do; for the soul that is thus wrought upon is as well dead to the law and the righteousness thereof—as the first covenant—as well as to its sins.

Sixth. Now the soul begins to have some blessed experience of the things of God, even of the glorious mysteries of the Gospel.

1. Now it knoweth the meaning of those words, “My flesh is meat indeed, and My blood is drink, indeed,” and that by experience; for the soul hath received peace of conscience through that blood, by the effectual application of it to the soul (John 6:55). First, by feeling the guilt of sin die off from the conscience by the operation thereof. Secondly, By feeling the power thereof to take away the curse of the law. Thirdly, By finding the very strength of Hell to fail when once the blood of that Man Jesus Christ is received in reality upon the soul.

2. Now the soul also knoweth by experience the meaning of that Scripture that saith, “Our old man is crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be destroyed” (Rom 6:6). Now it sees that when the Man Jesus did hang on the tree on Mount Calvary, that then the body of its sins was there hanged up, dead and buried with Him, though it was then unborn, so as never to be laid to its charge, either here or hereafter; and also, so as never to carry it captive into perpetual bondage, being itself overcome by Him, even Christ, the Head of that poor creature. And indeed this is the way for a soul both to live comfortably as touching the guilt of sin, and also as touching the power of the filth of sin; for the soul that doth or hath received this in deed and in truth, finds strength against them both by and through that Man that did for him and the rest of his fellow-sinners so gloriously overcome it, and hath given the victory unto them, so that now they are said to be overcomers, nay, “more than conquerors through Him,” the one Man Jesus Christ (Rom 7:33-37).

3. Now the soul hath received a faith indeed, and a lively hope indeed, such an one as now it can fetch strength from the fullness of Christ, and from the merits of Christ.

4. Yea, now the soul can look on itself with one eye, and look upon Christ with another, and say, Indeed, it is true; I am an empty soul, but Christ is a full Christ; I am a poor sinner, but Christ is a rich Christ; I am a foolish sinner, but Christ is a wise Christ; I am an unholy, ungodly, unsanctified creature in myself, but Christ is made of God “unto me, wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption” (1 Cor 1:30).

5. Now also that fiery law, that it could not once endure, nor could not once delight in, I say, now it can delight in it after the inward man; now this law is its delight, it would always be walking in it, and always be delighting in it, being offended with any sin or any corruption that would be anyways an hinderance to it (Rom 7:24,25). And yet it will not abide, it will not endure that that, even that that law should offer to take the work of its salvation out of Christ’s hand; no, if it once comes to do that, then out of doors it shall go, if it were as good again. For that soul that hath the right work of God indeed upon it, cries, Not my prayers, not my tears, not my works, not my things, do they come from the work of the Spirit of Christ itself within me, yet these shall not have the glory of my salvation; no, it is none but the blood of Christ, the death of Christ, of the Man Christ Jesus of Nazareth, the carpenter’s son, as they called Him, that must have the crown and glory of my salvation. None but Christ, none but Christ. And thus the soul labours to give Christ the preeminence (Col 1:18).

A word of experience.

Now, before I go any further, I must needs speak a word from my own experience of the things of Christ; and the rather, because we have a company of silly ones in this day of ignorance that do either comfort themselves with a notion without the power, or else do both reject the notion and the power of this most glorious Gospel; therefore, for the further conviction of the reader, I shall tell him, with David, something of what the Lord hath done for my soul; and indeed a little of the experience of the things of Christ is far more worth than all the world. It would be too tedious for me to tell thee here all from the first to the last; but something I shall tell thee, that thou mayest not think these things are fables. [This conviction seized on my soul one Sabbath day, when I was at play, being one of the first that I had, which when it came, though it scared me with its terror, yet through the temptation of the devil, immediately striking in therewith, I did rub it off again, and became as vile for some time as I was before, like a wretch that I was]. 21

Reader, when it pleased the Lord to begin to instruct my soul, He found me one of the black sinners of the world; He found me making a sport of oaths, and also of lies; and many a soul-poisoning meal did I make out of divers lusts, as drinking, dancing, playing, pleasure with the wicked ones of the world. The Lord finding of me in this condition, did open the glass of His Law unto me, wherein He showed me so clearly my sins, both the greatness of them, and also how abominable they were in His sight, that I thought the very clouds were charged with the wrath of God, and ready to let fall the very fire of His jealousy upon me; yet for all this I was so wedded to my sin, that, thought I with myself, I will have them though I lose my soul, (O wicked wretch that I was!) but God, the great, the rich, the infinite merciful God, did not take this advantage of my soul to cast me away, and say, Then take him, Devil, seeing he cares for Me no more; no, but He followed me still, and won upon my heart, by giving me some understanding, not only into my miserable state, which I was very sensible of, but also that there might be hopes of mercy; also taking away that love to lust, and placing in the room thereof a love to religion; and thus the Lord won over my heart to some desire after the means, to hear the Word, and to grow a stranger to my old companions, and to accompany the people of God, together with giving of me many sweet encouragements from several promises in the Scriptures. But after this, the Lord did wonderfully set my sins upon my conscience, those sins especially that I had committed since the first convictions; temptations also followed me very hard, and especially such temptations as did tend to the making me question of the very way of salvation—viz., whether Jesus Christ was the Saviour or no; and whether I had best to venture my soul upon His blood for salvation, or take some other course. But being through grace kept close with God, in some measure, in prayer and the rest of the ordinances, but went about a year and upwards without any sound evidence as from God to my soul touching the salvation that comes by Jesus Christ. But, at the last, as I may say, when the set time was come, the Lord, just before the men called Quakers came into the country, did set me down so blessedly in the truth of the doctrine of Jesus Christ, that it made me marvel to see, first, how Jesus Christ was born of a virgin, walked in the world awhile with His disciples, afterwards hanged on the Cross, spilt His blood, was buried, rose again, ascended above the clouds and heavens, there lives to make intercession, and that He also will come again at the last day to judge the world, and take His saints unto Himself.

These things, I say, I did see so evidently, even as if I had stood when He was in the world, and also when He was caught up. I having such a change as this upon my soul, it made me wonder; and musing with myself at the great alteration that was in my spirit—for the Lord did also very gloriously give me in His precious Word to back the discovery of the Son of God unto me, so that I can say, through grace, it was according to the Scriptures (1 Cor 15:1-4). And as I was musing with myself what these things should mean, methought I heard such a word in my heart as this—I have set thee down on purpose, for I have something more than ordinary for thee to do; which made me the more marvel, saying, What, my Lord, such a poor wretch as I? Yet still this continued, I have set thee down on purpose, and so forth, with more fresh incomes of the Lord Jesus, and the power of the blood of His Cross upon my soul, even so evidently that I saw, through grace, that it was the blood shed on Mount Calvary that did save and redeem sinners, as clearly and as really with the eyes of my soul as ever, me thought, I had seen a penny loaf bought with a penny; which things then discovered had such operation upon my soul, that I do hope they did sweetly season every faculty thereof. Reader, I speak in the presence of God, and He knows I lie not; much of this, and such like dealings of His, could I tell thee of; but my business at this time is not so to do, but only to tell what operation the blood of Christ hath had over and upon my conscience, and that at several times, and also when I have been in several frames of spirit.

As, first, sometimes, I have been so loaden with my sins, that I could not tell where to rest, nor what to do; yea, at such times I thought it would have taken away my senses; yet at that time God through grace hath all of a sudden so effectually applied the blood that was spilt at Mount Calvary out of the side of Jesus, unto my poor, wounded, guilty conscience, that presently I have found such a sweet, solid, sober, heart-comforting peace, that it hath made me as if it [my terror] had not been, and withal the same, I may say, and I ought to say, the power of it, hath had such a powerful operation upon my soul, that I have for a time been in a strait and trouble to think that I should love and honour Him no more, the virtue of His blood hath so constrained me.

Again; sometimes methinks my sins have appeared so big to me that I thought one of my sins have been as big as all the sins of all the men in the nation; ay, and of other nations too, reader; these things be not fancies, for I have smarted for this experience, but yet the least stream of the heart blood of this Man 22 Jesus hath vanished all away, and hath made it to fly, to the astonishment of such a poor sinner; and as I said before, hath delivered me up into sweet and heavenly peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

Again; sometimes when my heart hath been hard, dead, slothful, blind, and senseless, which indeed are sad frames for a poor Christian to be in, yet at such a time, when I have been is such a case, then hath the blood of Christ, the precious blood of Christ, the admirable blood of the God of Heaven, that run out of His body when it did hang on the Cross, so softened, livened, quickened, and enlightened my soul, that truly, reader, I can say, O it makes me wonder!