CHAPTER XIII

SIMILES, PROVERBS, AND SAYINGS

The North Riding is very prolific in similes and quaint sayings. I have by me a collection of some hundreds, varying in degree of point and humour, but all worthy of being preserved. Many of them take us back to the time of our grandfathers, speaking of things and pointing to customs of other days. Still, they hang on the lips of the older people now; but to those who know nothing of their past, their sayings seem pointless and out of place. Nevertheless, ‘Ez useless ez damp tunder’ (tinder) would be as forceful in their day as our saying, ‘As useless as a damp match.’ In the days when many a pulpit was supplied with an hourglass—like a huge egg-boiler—to let the preacher know when to wind up his ‘thirdly,’ the old saying applied to those who were somewhat importunate, ‘They hint ez plaan ez t’ hoorglass,’ and ‘Sha’s leyke t’ hoorglass—sha uses t’ same thing ower an’ up agaan,’ or ‘Sha’s ez careful ez a sandglass,’ which never wastes a grain, were in their day as pointed as any in use at the present time. A few remarks to elucidate the meaning of those in the following list which may be somewhat obscure to any lacking knowledge on certain points, will be found on page 243.

Those marked thus ([+]) are in daily use throughout the riding. Thus (*), explanatory remarks will be found at the end.

1. Ez wise ez t’ ullot.

[+] 2. Ez hungry ez a dog.

[+] 3. Ez patient ez a cat.

[+] 4. Ez whisht ez a cat.

[+] 5. Ez still ez a moose.

* 6. Ez friendly ez a bram’l bush.

*[+] 7. Ez walsh ez pump-watter.

8. Ez poor ez pauper soup.

*[+] 9. Ez thick ez inkle-weavers.

[+] 10. Ez reglar ez clockwark.

[+] 11. Ez sartin ez t’ cess getherer.

12. Ez scarce ez guineas.

13. Ez noisy ez a tinker.

* 14. Ez common ez a deear-snek. Any one handles it.

[+] 15. Ez strang ez a steeple.

[+] 16. Ez hoarse ez a raven.

[+] 17. Ez soft ez pap, i.e. child’s food.

[+] 18. Ez stiff ez buckram.

[+] 19. Ez deead ez a mauky ratten.

20. Ez sour ez a sloe.

[+] 21. Ez deead ez a hammer.

[+] 22. Ez deeaf ez a post.

[+] 23. Ez fit ez a fiddle.

24. Ez graspin’ ez a toll-bar.

25. Ez tall ez a mill chim’ly.

[+] 26. Ez brant ez a hoos end.

[+] 27. Ez red ez a cherry.

[+] 28. Ez tough ez leather.

29. Ez seeaf ez a pig ring.

* 30. Ez soft-hearted ez a rezzil.

* 31. Ez slape ez a greeasy powl.

[+] 32. Ez rotten ez touch-wood.

33. Ez cruel ez a spider.

[+] 34. Ez red ez rud.

[+] 35. Ez lish ez a squirrel. Lish = active.

[+] 36. Ez friendly ez yan’s shadder.

[+] 37. Ez hardy ez ling.

[+] 38. Ez impudent ez a cock sparrer.

[+] 39. Ez boddensome ez debt.

[+] 40. Ez bliew ez a whetstone.

[+] 41. Ez saut ez sea watter.

[+] 42. Ez strang ez an onion.

[+] 43. Ez common ez weeds.

[+] 44. Ez sweet ez t’ floors i’ May.

[+] 45. Ez sweet ez a posey.

[+] 46. Ez sour ez a crab-apple.

*[+] 47. Ez femmur ez a musweb.

[+] 48. Ez cracked ez a brokken pot.

[+] 49. Ez polite ez t’ divil.

[+] 50. Ez pricky ez a pricky-back otch’n.

51. Ez soft ez a geease-down pillow.

[+] 52. Ez common ez brack’ns.

53. Ez cheap ez promises.

[+] 54. Ez cau’d ez Kessamas.

[+] 55. Ez thrang ez bees iv a sugar cask.

[+] 56. Ez busy ez bees on t’ moor.

[+] 57. Ez straight ez a bulrush. Also ‘as tall as,’ &c.

[+] 58. Ez cheeap ez muck.

[+] 59. Ez soft ez muck. Also ‘Ez soft ez a wesh-leather.’

[+] 60. Ez common ez muck.

[+] 61. Ez laam ez a three-legg’d dog.

[+] 62. Ez fast ez a rivet.

[+] 63. Ez lazy ez a stee. A ladder generally leans against a wall.

[+] 64. Ez whisht ez yan’s shadder. As quiet as one’s shadow.

[+] 65. Ez true ez a die.

[+] 66. Ez mild ez a May morn.

[+]* 67. Ez tight ez a damp cleeas-line.

68. Ez slow ez a stutterer. Also ‘Ez slow ez a snahl.’

[+] 69. Ez wick ez a lop-flea.

[+]* 70. Ez fond ez a yat.

[+] 71. Ez kittle ez a moose-trap.

[+] 72. Ez wet ez a dishclout.

[+] 73. Ez tired ez a dog.

[+] 74. Ez savage ez a wasp.

[+] 75. Ez black ez midneet.

[+] 76. Ez black ez sin.

[+] 77. Ez hard ez a steean.

[+] 78. Ez soond ez a bell.

[+] 79. Ez creeak’d ez a dog’s hind leg.

[+] 80. Ez wet ez sump.

[+] 81. Ez wet ez thack.

[+] 82. Ez mucky ez a pig-sty.

[+] 83. Ez waak ez a kitten.

[+] 84. Ez oppen ez a skep.

[+] 85. Ez bold ez brass.

[+] 86. Ez lively ez a cricket.

[+] 87. Ez green ez grass.

[+] 88. Ez soft ez putty.

[+] 89. Ez deead ez a teead skin.

[+]* 90. Ez plaan ez a pike-staff.

[+]* 91. Ez plaan ez a yat-stoup.

[+] 92. Ez full ez an egg.

[+] 93. Ez dusty ez a flour pooak.

[+] 94. Ez white ez flour.

[+] 95. Ez mucky ez a duck pond.

[+] 96. Ez larl ez a flea-bite.

[+] 97. Ez still ez a finger-post.

[+] 98. Ez lonely ez a mile-steean.

[+] 99. Ez slape ez an eel.

[+]* 100. Ez good-natur’d ez a pump.

[+] 101. Ez pure ez spring-watter.

[+] 102. Ez reight ez a trivet.

[+] 103. Ez thin ez a bubble skin.

[+] 104. Ez sticky ez glue.

[+]* 105. Ez meean ez bo’d-lahm (birdlime).

[+] 106. Ez hard ez a nail.

[+] 107. Ez cau’d ez ice.

[+]* 108. Ez deep ez a well.

[+] 109. Ez strang ez a hoss.

[+] 110. Ez wet ez a mill-wheel.

[+] 111. Ez fond ez a goose nick’t i’ t’ heead.

[+] 112. Ez lang ez a parson’s coat.

* 113. Ez sartin ez t’ thorn-bush.

* 114. Ez waffly ez a mill-sail.

* 115. Ez soft ez butter.

116. Ez empty ez a blawn egg.

[+] 117. Ez rank ez nettles.

[+] 118. Ez blinnd ez a bat i’ daayleet.

[+] 119. Ez damp ez a cellar, or ‘t’ graav.’

[+] 120. Ez breet ez a new-made pin, or ‘ez sunleet.’

[+] 121. Ez fond ez a brush.

[+] 122. Ez greedy ez a rake.

[+] 123. Ez dhry ez a sarmon.

124. Ez tho’sty[68] ez a sponge.

[+] 125. Ez solemn ez a coo.

[+] 126. Ez breet ez a bald heead.

[+] 127. Ez bare ez a bald heead.

[+] 128. Ez roond ez a bullet.

[+] 129. Ez straight ez trewth (truth).

[+] 130. Ez mad ez a bull at a yat.

[+] 131. Ez phrood ez a banty cock.

[+] 132. Ez flat ez an iron.

[+] 133. Ez poor ez moorland.

[+] 134. Ez hard ez t’ to’npike.

[+] 135. Ez nak’t ez a graav-steean.

[+]* 136. Ez strang ez a teeagle chaan.

[+]* 137. Ez tough ez a swipple.

[+] 138. Ez strang ez an oak.

[+]* 139. Ez warm ez a sheep-net.

[+]* 140. Ez catching ez t’ scab.

[+]* 141. Ez bonny ez a sheep-cade. In ridicule.

[+] 142. Ez drunk ez a fiddler.

* 143. Ez thrang ez a cobbler’s Monday.

144. Ez meean ez a cuckoo. The cuckoo lays its eggs in other birds’ nests.

[+] 145. Ez welcome ez t’ floors i’ May.

146. Ez larl wanted ez rain i’ hay-tahm.

[+] 147. Ez hungry ez a dog.

148. Ez glib ez a leear’s tongue.

[+] 149. Ez wo’thless ez an au’d shoe.

150. Ez larl value ez an au’d hat.

[+] 151. Ez tough ez pin-wire.

* 152. Ez neyce ez an otter[69].

[+]* 153. Ez greedy ez an otter[69].

154. Ez fat ez a tailor’s goose. (The ‘goose’ is a tailor’s iron.)

[+]* 155. Ez sweet ez a kern.

[+]* 156. Ez greedy ez a fox iv a hen-roost.

[+]* 157. Ez meean ez a cat wiv a moose.

[+] 158. Ez leyke ez tweea peas.

[+] 159. Ez bitter ez gall.

[+] 160. Ez big ez bull beef.

[+] 161. Ez leet ez a midge.

[+] 162. Ez limp ez a dishclout.

[+]* 163. Ez scraped ez a bath-brick.

* 164. Ez badly used ez a peggy-tub boddum.

[+]* 165. Ez gam ez a cockroach.

[+] 166. Ez wet ez new pent (paint).

[+] 167. Ez sick ez a dog.

[+] 168. Ez flat ez a pancake.

* 169. Ez deead ez a red lobster.

[+] 170. Ez au’d ez my grandfather hat.

[+] 171. Ez merry ez a May-pole dance.

[+] 172. Ez white ez a sheet.

[+] 173. Ez catching ez t’ mezzles (measles).

[+] 174. Ez bad tempered ez a nettle.

[+] 175. Awlus t’ saam way leyke a bottle-jack (ironical, as a bottle-jack turns both ways).

[+] 176. Ez smooth ez a cat’s back.

[+] 177. Ez rosy ez an apple.

[+] 178. Ez rotten ez (a bad) to’nip (turnip).

[+] 179. Ez bent ez a sickle.

[+] 180. Ez red ez raw beef, or ‘ez a brick.’

[+] 181. Ez thrang ez a woman’s tongue.

[+] 182. Ez brazend ez a sunflower.

[+] 183. Ez fresh ez new pent.

[+] 184. Ez breet ez a seeing-glass.

[+] 185. Ez wick ez an eel.

[+] 186. Ez slim ez a barber’s powl.

No. 6. _As friendly as a bramble bush._ The way in which the bramble catches hold and clings to one is well known to all those who have had to force a passage where they grow.

7. _As walsh as pump-water_, or containing as little sustenance.

9. _As thick as inkle-weavers._ In the weaving of inkle, a kind of tape, the weavers had to sit quite close together.

14. _As common as a door-sneck._ This implies that a sneck is liable to be pressed or used by any one; the simile is one of an opprobrious nature.

30. _As soft-hearted as a weasel_, implies absolute cruelty, the weasel lacking the smallest spark of generosity in its nature.

31. _As slape as a greasy pole._ It is common at village feasts to erect a pole daubed thickly with grease, upon the top of which a ham, a leg of mutton, or a kettle is fixed; he who can climb to the top, which is a most difficult task, claims the prize.

47. _As femmur as a musweb._ ‘Femmur’ is slight, light, slender. ‘Musweb,’ a spider’s web.

49. _As polite as the devil._ His Satanic majesty is said to be willing to shake hands with any one.

67. _As tight as a damp clothes-line._ A clothes-line, when left out in wet weather, becomes very tightly stretched between its two hooks.

70. _As fond as a gate._ The folly of a gate is admitted on all hands; does it not without any reason bang itself against the gate-post?

90. _As plain as a pike-staff_; and 91, _As plain as a gate-post_, denote both plainness of appearance, and a thing not difficult to understand. A pike-staff was just a bare pole, and a gate-post is usually lacking of all ornamentation; and both are fairly conspicuous objects.

100. _As good-natured as a pump._ A pump never grumbles, no matter how often or by whom it is handled.

105. _As mean as birdlime._ It deceives those who rest upon it.

108. _As deep as a well._ ‘Deep’ is used in the sense of ‘to hide from,’ ‘to be difficult to get at the bottom of.’ In a modified sense, ‘cunning.’

113. _Ez sartin ez t’ thorn-bush._ It was the custom for the parson to collect the tithe by placing a branch of thorn in every tenth stook, he choosing the stooks, and sending his cart along for them.

114. _As waffly as a mill-sail._ ‘Waffly’ here implies ‘unstable’; the mill-sail is turned about by every wind which blows.

136. _As strong as a teagle chain._ These chains are used to drag very heavy timber.

137. _As tough as a swipple._ The swipple is the short bar of the flail, used to thresh corn with—by hand—and was always made of the toughest wood.

139. _As warm as a sheep-net._ Used derisively; there is no shelter or warmth in a sheep-net.

140. _As catching as the scab._ The scab is a very infectious disease which sheep are liable to.

141. _As bonny as a sheep-cade._ The cade is a disgusting looking sheep-louse; hence the simile is used ironically.

143. _As busy as a cobbler’s Monday._ It is generally supposed that a cobbler has to rest over Monday to work off his week’s-end debauch; hence the simile is one of ridicule.

152. _As nice as an otter._ ‘Nice,’ in this case, means dainty, particular, eating as it does only the very best part of the fish it kills, leaving the rest untouched on the bank.

153. See 152.

155. _As sweet as a churn._ A churn, of all things, must be sweet and clean; hence anything which may be truly said to be as sweet as a churn, must excel in cleanliness.

156. _As greedy as a fox in a hen-roost._ The fox, having gained an entrance, not only kills the bird he intends to carry away for food, but any he can lay hold of; then, picking out the best, leaves the rest.

157. _Ez meean ez a cat wiv a moose._ ‘Mean’ is used in the sense of cruel. The way a cat plays with its victim before killing it, is the very essence of cruelty.

163. A bath-brick must be scraped each time it is used. Hence a person who has slipped down an incline, and so become bruised, will use the simile.

164. _As badly used as a peggy-tub bottom._ Surely whilst in use nothing receives more thumps than the bottom of the peggy-tub.

165. _As game as a cockroach._ No insect perhaps is so pugnacious as the common roach or black clock. The encounters which take place on our hearths after we have retired to rest are many and deadly.

169. _As dead as a red lobster._ As the lobster must be boiled for some time before assuming the red colour, we may with some certainty conclude the crustacean has ceased to exist ere it dons its red jacket.

If many of the sayings which fall from the lips of our country folk were only dressed in classic language, they would rank amongst the wisest saws ever uttered.

Take a few illustrations picked from a considerable number which I have jotted down as they have been uttered—I may say the circumstances which called each forth were as varied as they well could be. Some, I have little doubt, were impromptu, but in the main they belong to another age. It will perhaps add interest if the illustrations are given as uttered, followed by a literal translation, adding explanatory remarks when needful.

_A raffle tung an’ a race-hoss gan t’ faster t’ leeter wight tha hug._ A foolish tongue and a race-horse go the faster the lighter weight they carry; there will be more foolish talk, the lighter the weight of brains carried.

_Them ’at grumm’ls sae mich aboot what tha ’evn’t gitten, are maistly oot o’ love wi’ t’ things ’at tha ’ev._ Those who grumble so much about what they do not possess, are mostly out of love with the things they have.

_Them ’at nivver diz nowt thersens, awlus ’magines ’at ther’s nowt i’ t’ wo’lld ’at’s hard ti deea._ Those who never do nothing (anything) themselves, always imagine that there is nothing in the world which is hard to do.

_Him ’at’s gitten his heead screwed on t’ reet road i’ larl matters, weean’t be leykly ti shut yah e’e when he’s owt gert on hand._ He who has his head screwed on the right way in little matters, will not be likely to close one eye when he has anything great on the way.

_Impatience is t’ hoss fau’k saddle and gallop on ti meet their troubles._ Impatience is the horse people saddle and gallop on to meet their troubles.

_It’s easier wark feighting sin ’an nursin’ ‘t._ It is easier work fighting sin than nursing it.

_Religion is offens mair laamed byv those whau attend tul ’t, ’an them ’at feight shy on ’t._ Religion is often more injured by those who profess, than by those who are careless. There is another: ‘No sinners are so intolerant as those just turned saints.’

_Yan awlus ’ez ti paay a seet mair foor repentance ’an yan c’u’d ‘ bowt a vast o’ common sense wi’._ One always has to pay a great deal more for repentance than one could have bought a great amount of common sense with.

_If wa wad lig i’ peace an’ rest, Wa mun see an’ hear an’ saay what’s t’ best._ If we would lie in peace and rest, We must see and hear and say what’s the best.

_‘T’ll save ya neea larl trouble, If when talking ya tak care Ov whaum ya speeak, ti whaum ya speeak, An’ hoo, an’ when, an’ wheer._

It will save you no small trouble, If when talking you take care Of whom you speak, to whom you speak, And how, and when, and where.

_Closed lips an’ oppen een save yan fra monny a fratch._ Closed lips and open eyes save one from many a quarrel (trouble).

_Advising yan ’at’s iv a passion’s dafter ’an scrattin’ a tup head._ Advising one that is in a passion is sillier than scratching a tup’s head, i.e. giving advice to one who is in a passion, is equal in folly to that of scratching a tup on the head, as there is no surer way of inducing it to attack you than by following such a course.

_Him ’at’s meead up his mahnd ’at he caan’t deea a thing, maistly maks up his mahnd afoorhand ’at he weean’t try._ He that has made up his mind that he cannot accomplish an undertaking, mostly makes up his mind beforehand that he will not try.

_Maist fau’k can see t’ wrang they’ve deean, bud nut t’ wrang they’re deeaing._ Most people can see the wrong they have done, but not the wrong they are doing.

_Varra off’ns when a chap sez ’at he’s deeaing nowt, he’s deeaing summat he s’u’dn’t; an’ when he aims ti mak ya think ’at he’s deeaing summat ’at he s’u’d, he’s off’ns deeaing nowt._ Very often when a person says that he is doing nothing, he is doing something that he should not; and when he tries to make you believe he is doing something that he should, he is often idling his time away.

_Daftness nivver builds owght wo’th leaving up._ Daftness never builds anything worth leaving up. ‘Leaving up’ means ‘allowing it to stand.’ The saying might be put this way: folly never accomplishes anything worthy of being handed on to posterity.

_Fame is a lump ov nowt putten insahd ov a bubble, which bo’sts, an’ it’s all owered wiv it._ Fame is a lump of nothing put inside a bubble, which bursts, and then it is all over with it. To ‘be overed with a thing,’ is for it to be absolutely annihilated.

_Good luck gi’es ti sum mair ’an what tha owt ti ’ev, bud nivver mair ’an what tha want._ Good luck gives to some more than what they ought to have, but never more than what they want.

_Cussing an’ low-lived talk ther’s nivver neea call for; ther’s nowt can hap it up, an’ ther’s nowt gitten byv it._ Cursing and low-lived talk there is never no need for; there is nothing can cover it up, and there is nothing got by it.

_Him ’at diz ez he owt ti deea when young, ’ll be yabble ti deea ez he wants ti deea when his working days is owered._ He who does as he ought to do when young, will be able to do as he wants to do when his working days are over, i.e. he who diligently works when young, will be enabled to take his ease when old age overtakes him.

_Them ’at weds wheer they deean’t love, maistly love wheer they deean’t wed._

_It’s a poor hedge ’at hezn’t a bit of shelter._

_Be friendly wi’ all, bud familiar wi’ few._

_It saves neea end o’ loss if ya sleck t’ fire wi’ yah bucket o’ watter. Luke t’ weeds afoor tha seed; an’ let t’ tap-reeat o’ folly gan ez deep ez it leykes._ It saves no end of harm if you put out the fire with one bucket of water. Pull up the weeds before they seed; and allow the tap-root of folly to go as deep as it may. A fire cannot have done much damage if it can be quenched with one bucket of water. ‘Luke’ is ‘to pull up.’ Many methods are adopted to prevent the tap-root from growing deep into the ground; should such precautions not be taken, the root descends to where the ground is cold, and no fruit is borne. Hence the reason for desiring the ‘tap-root of folly’ to be allowed to grow deep into the ground.

_Good behav’o’r nivver needs a drain-pipe_; also, _good behav’o’r nivver needs pruning_.

_He’s nobbut hauf rocked ’at believes ivverything, bud he’s cleean oot ov his heead ’at believes nowt._ He is only a silly fellow who gives credence to everything he hears, but he is a hopeless idiot who believes in nothing.

_Laziness ruins mair lasses ’an love, fancying thersens mair an’ laziness; an’ swallering ivverything ’at a chap sez tiv ’em, mair ’an baith putten tigither._ Laziness ruins more girls than love, vanity more than laziness; and believing all that men flatteringly say, more than both put together.

_Him ’at ’ez larl an’ could mannish wi’ less, is better off ’an him ’at ’ez mich an’ caan’t mak it fet._ He that has little and could manage with less, is better off—richer—than he who has much and cannot make it serve.

_Nivver judge a blade byv t’ heft._ Never judge a blade or knife by the handle; or, never judge a person’s character by his clothes.

_Ya’ll ’a’e t’ crack t’ shells afoor ya can coont t’ kon’ls._ You will have to crack the shells before you can count the kernels; or, you must do your work before you can count your wages.

_Sho’t ez yan’s tahm is, it’s lang eneeaf foor sum ti ruin ther characters, ther constitutions, an’ gan thruff all ’at tha ’ed at startin’._ Short as one’s life is, it is long enough for some to ruin their characters, their constitutions, and ’gan thruff,’ i.e. spend, all they had to commence with.

_T’ furrows o’ repentance are ploughed i’ youth, and sow’d wi’ t’ seeds o’ pleasure, bud t’ harvest ’ez ti be reaped wiv a blunt sickle when yan’s back is bent an’ yan’s gitten past wark._ The furrows of repentance are ploughed during youth, and sowed with the seeds of pleasure, but the harvest has to be cut with a blunt sickle and gathered in when old age has made it impossible to repair the errors of youth.

_Fooak ’at feight ower t’ reet road ti heaven, off’ns finnd oot ’at t’ far end ’at they’ve deean t’ maist o’ ther jo’ney i’ t’ hedge boddums._ People who quarrel over creeds and forms discover, when life is drawing to a close, that often they have foolishly left the narrow but sure path, to stumble and struggle amongst the thorns and briars which overhang the ditch by the wayside.

_T’ loodist shooters i’ t’ fair off’ns ’ez bud larl o’ ther stalls._ The loudest criers in the fair often have the least on their stalls; i.e. those who make the most noise in the world generally display the least common sense.

_Muschief is a fruit ’at nobbut needs a sho’t summer ti repen ’t_, i.e. Mischief speedily comes to a head.

_Ti stop lennin’, start borrerin’_, i.e. To prevent borrowers coming to you, try to borrow from them.

_It’s better ’at fau’k s’u’d laugh at ya foor knowing larl aboot owt, ’an ya s’u’d loss yer brass byv pretending ti knaw owermich._ It is better that people should laugh at your knowing little about anything, than you should lose your money by pretending to know too much.

_When hooap dees, fear’s born._ When hope dies, fear is born.

_Yan’s nivver afeeard o’ stepping oot o’ t’ waay ti deea a good to’n, if yan’s on t’ reet waay foor deeaing on ’t._ One is never afraid of stepping out of the way to do a kindness, if one is in the right way for doing it; i.e. we are never unwilling to step out of our way to do a kindness, if we are sufficiently Christian to do what is right.

Since quite a boy I have jotted down any apt saying which I have heard. Many such, however, are so common, that they daily pass the lips of our country folk. These characteristic Yorkshire sayings, as already shown, are worthy of greater consideration than they have hitherto obtained. Why, I once heard an old Basedale man give a temperance lecture in a few words; he put the whole thing into a nutshell. What he said was terse, brief, full of sound common sense, and decidedly smart. _We took it all away with us._ And just because it was what it was, we never forgot it—we never wished to forget it—whilst often we have no desire to remember the one-sided, long-winded, intemperate drivel we have to listen to nowadays. Said he, ‘Drink, if nobbut weel followed up, awlus diz yan o’ tweea things. If ya ’a’e gitten plenty o’ brass, it’ll kill ya; if nut, it’ll beggar ya’; i.e. drink, if only well followed up, always does one of two things. If you have plenty of money, it will kill you; if not, it will beggar you.

‘Some fau’k knaw better ’an ti swing on ther awn yat,’ was said of one, who was an inveterate borrower of certain articles, which it was supposed he well could afford to buy for himself.

‘Sha nivver will larn ’at yan s’u’dn’t hug tweea eggs i’ yah han’,’ was said of one who generally spoilt what she was doing by having too many irons in the fire at one time.

‘Neeabody tries if a trap’s kittle wi’ ther finger.’ The application is obvious.

To one who was in the habit of returning at a late hour from the weekly market, and sometimes not quite sober, it was remarked, ‘Late yam fra t’ market off’n spoils a good bargain,’ implying that that which had been gained by the day’s bargaining had been foolishly spent in the public-house.

‘He’s yan o’ them ’at nivver hauf diz owt, bud then Ah’ve notished ’at them ’at leeavs t’ hoos deear oppen, maistly foorgit ti steck t’ yat.’

‘Mair kindness, less lip, Mair corn, less whip,’

might well be hung up in every stable to-day, for certainly if our poor dumb servants were treated a little more kindly, they would need less shouting and bawling at, and when properly fed, the whip becomes but an ornament.

‘Onny shufflin’ taal diz ti shak off a needy relation, bud it dizn’t mak ’t reet foor ’em ti squander brass ti greease thersens wi’,’ said an old body who had asked assistance from a well-to-do sister, but who had been sent empty away with a most frivolous excuse. It seems her sister had shortly afterwards given a handsome donation at the laying of a foundation-stone upon which her name had been carved. ‘Shufflin’ taal’ is equal to ’half a lie,’ or, to put it in a milder form, ‘a poor excuse.’ ‘To shak off’ is ’to refuse’; and ’to grease yersen’ is ’to please oneself,’ ‘to satisfy one’s vanity.’ The saying might be put this way: ‘By the rich, any poor excuse is considered good enough to refuse help to a needy relation, but it is never just, whilst such are in want, to spend money in tickling their own vanity.’

‘T’ week ’ez tweea Mundaays foor t’ hoss ’at ligs ower Sundaay,’ implies that a Sunday’s rest gives greater energy.

‘Nivver tackle what ya caan’t deea, bud allus deea what ya tackle,’ is certainly an aphorism we should all do well to mark; the caution and advice which it contains, if acted upon, spells success in golden characters. ‘Do not undertake anything beyond either your capabilities or resources, but whatever you once set your hand to, carry it through.’

At a funeral feast where one individual was rather too ready in handing the cake and wine round, one old body was overheard to say, ‘He mebbe wadn’t ‘ been seea riddy wi’ t’ plate an’ bottle ’ed he been iv his awn hoos, bud it maistly happens ’at them ’at’s seea free wiv uther fau’k’s hay, are varra skinny wi’ ther awn corn.’ That many people are exceedingly generous in dispensing the charity of others, and very careful in parting with anything of their own, is a fact too patent to dispute.

‘T’ chap ’at fishes for his breccus off’ns ’ez ti wait foor his dinner,’ and ‘A blinnd chap owt nivver ti lake wiv a crab whahl it’s boil’d,’ point their own moral.

At Great Ayton two neighbours were discussing one who had not long been a resident. ‘Sha’s gitten a pianer noo, an’ it’s nobbut t’ other daay ’at sha bowt hersen new shades’ (blinds) ‘foor ivvery windther i’ t’ hoos. Wheer sha gits t’ brass ti pay foor all t’ new-fengl’d things ’at cum up, Ah deean’t knaw, bud sha queerly cam, an’ sha’ll queerly gan; an’ Ah’ll tell tha what, a hoos gitten tigither by habs an’ nabs, an’ yan’s sticks paid foor afoor they’re fetched in, is comfortabler ’an yan filled wi’ flee-by-neet stuff;’ i.e. furniture, &c., got together at odd times and in odd ways, and paid for at the time, affords more comfort than possessing a houseful of things which possibly will have to be removed during the night to escape the landlord.

‘T’ yard’s weel swept wiv a lent bizzum;’ or, one does not fail to get the most out of any article which another has lent us. The following doggerel gives a phase of human nature common to all mankind:—

Yan nivver thinks ’at t’ egg’s new laid Yan’s nahbor kindly lent yan, An’ t’ cream fra borr’ed milk is thin— Deean’t len’, if you’d content yan.

‘Sha allus drives ivverything whahl t’ last bat. Ya caan’t insense it intiv her ’at them ’at git ther traps tigither iv a hugger-mugger, allus foorgits t’ main thing ’at tha’ll want.’ This is a truism the world over. If we leave our packing to the last moment, we shall probably discover the very thing we mostly need has been left behind. Equally apt was the saying of one discussing a doubtful proceeding of some comrade: ‘He’ll deea ’t whahl they catch him. It’s a mistak at onny tahm ti sneeaf t’ cann’l ti cleease ti t’ wick.’ It is a mistake to snuff the candle too close to the wick, for in so doing you may extinguish the light; i.e. it is unwise to tempt Providence.

‘They’ve baith pulled yah road; he’s raxed an’ wrought, an’ sha’s scratted an’ tew’d; what yan thowt t’ other did, whahl i’ t’ end tha want foor nowt. Bud a breet shool an’ a well-worn thimm’l allus mak a menseful hoos,’ ‘Raxed’ and ‘wrought’ are synonymous of working hard, and to ‘scrat and tew’ is to be careful and ever toiling. ‘What one thought the other did’ only strengthens the opening statement that ‘they both pulled one way.’ To ‘want for nothing’ is to possess all one needs; and ‘a bright shovel and a well-worn thimble’ clearly show that neither are allowed a lengthy rest.

‘It taks mair ti keep a pack o’ hounds ’an t’ damage t’ fox diz,’ can be, and is, applied so variously that explanation is needless.

Deean’t be ti pawky. Think on, thoo mun knaw If thoo starts wiv a chirp Thoo mud end wiv a craw, Bud if thoo’s seea feealish Ez ti be pawky an’ pert, Maist leyke thoo’ll start wiv a craw An’ end up wiv a chirp.

The Yorkshireman is not one who believes in luck. Hard work, toil from early morn till night, is the daily lot of thousands. ‘Luck!’ said one; ‘ther is neea sike thing ez luck; what cums ti yan, ’ez ti be fetched. Good luck’s t’ best gitten at wiv a wet sark,’ i.e. with a shirt wet with perspiration through working hard. But hard work, if not applied in a proper and sensible manner, will result in failure: brute force is not everything. ‘T’ thickness gans for nowt if t’ roape isn’t lang eneeaf;’ i.e. the strength of a rope goes for nothing if it is too short.

Can better advice be given than is couched in the old saying of ‘Deean’t saay nowt on t’ deearstan at’ll rax ya ti preeave ower t’ thresho’d’? It is only one stride from the doorstep over the threshold, therefore it will be wise at all times to say nothing which will cause you infinite trouble to prove immediately afterwards.

The old saying, ‘Buckles borrow, brussen tag-holes beg,’ clearly points that our fore-elders had a pretty correct notion of human nature in their day. The short saying embodies much. If the status of those who needed assistance was such that they could afford to wear nice buckles on their shoes, such obtained help under the head of borrowing; but of those whose lace-holes were burst, and buckles altogether wanting, it was said they begged. Appearance goes a long way towards giving a name to our actions.

Again, ‘Pull t’ bobbin wi’ joy, bud knock wi’ sorrow,’ and ‘Ill news is shooted ti t’ reeaks, bud good news is whispered ti snahls[70],’ both tell the same story. In olden days a bobbin, attached by a string to the sneck within, hung outside every door. The saying urges us to haste with all speed to pull the bobbin and enter if we have good news, but with sorrow we are to be careful as to how we make it known. Again, an evil report, it would seem, has ever been urged on its hurtful career. The rook is a bird which is not only noisy, but flies far afield, whilst, as every one knows, the snail is silent and slow; but the truth of the old saying that ‘Evil news is shouted to the rooks, whilst good tidings is only whispered to the snails,’ is, we fear, as true to-day as when first uttered ages ago.

I will close this chapter with a few truisms, which fail to be hidden in the doggerel:—

IF.

‘Twar a varra neyce wo’lld ’at wa live in, An’ bonny it still mud be maad, If prahd an’ au’d Harry wad give in, An’ pafty fooak putten i’ t’ shaad. If t’ pawky war nobbut all maastthered, An’ swaimish fooak nut ower green, Sum neeams wadn’t then be seea plaastered, An’ things wad be mair what tha seeam. If scann’l war shun’d leyke a hag-wo’m, An’ fooak awlus thowt, ‘foor tha spak, Wa s’u’d aim ti deea all a good to’n, Whahl ill-will wad tak off iv a crack. If ti illify, spite an’ sike uthers C’u’d be deng’d cleean off t’ feeace o’ t’ yeth, Wa sud live mair leyke sisters an’ bruthers, An’ ‘ev mair ov innocent mirth.