CHAPTER XXI.

GUARDING AGAINST SECRET VICE.

The Mother’s Preparation as Guide and Protector of Her Children.—Safeguards for Tiny Babyhood.—Cleanliness, Regularity, Chafing, Pin Worms, Servants, Nurse Girls, etc., etc.—How to Teach and Guard Them During Childhood.—Safeguarding the Children with Knowledge.—Inborn Curiosity Concerning Physical Mysteries.—How to Meet these Questions.—Sleeping Alone.—How to Correct Vice where it Exists.—The Duty of Physicians to the Public.—Symptoms which call for Parental Watchfulness.—Results of Secret Vice.—Rewards of Parental Vigilance.

How shall the mother prepare herself that she may be the guide and protector of her children past this dangerous shoal, is a question that exercises every true woman’s heart. In view of the myriads of temptations, we are led to exclaim here, as in the contemplation of many other difficulties in child training, “Who is sufficient for these things?”

The carefulness in guarding against the entrance of this evil should begin back in tiny babyhood. Perfect cleanliness, the proper adjustment of the napkin, and great care in the baths, lest by roughness in washing an irritation be set up; all these things must be thought about and watched carefully. The food, regularity of habits, daily evacuation of the bowels, all have their share in keeping the child in a healthy condition that precludes the unnatural state which invites the habit.

A chafed condition of the skin, which causes itching and consequent rubbing of the parts, may be the beginning of the habit before the child is old enough to be reasoned with, or able to understand the wrong and danger involved.

In little girls pin worms, which work forward into the vagina, and cause an irritation, also a leucorrhœal discharge, even in babyhood, may so irritate that the habit is formed before the mother is aware of it. There have been instances of servant girls, who are left in the care of the little ones, or unscrupulous nurse girls, teaching the little ones the habit to keep them quiet, so that they need not be troubled with their care.

Mothers need to be Argus-eyed, to guard their babies from all the evils that beset them; and having carried them past babyhood into inquiring childhood, nothing else is so potent in shielding them from the evil, as wholesome truth taught in a sweet motherly way. While yet very young, they can be taught that the organs are to be used by them only for throwing off the waste water of the system, but that they are so closely related to other parts of the body that handling them at all will hurt them and make them sick. Tell them that little children, sometimes when they do not know this, form the habit of handling themselves and as a result they become listless and sick, and many times idiotic and insane, or develop epileptic fits. This will so impress them that they will not fall easily into the bad way; for it is, more often than otherwise, an ignorant curiosity that leads them into the danger.

When mothers understand what a safeguard intelligent teaching of truth is to their children, they will prepare themselves for it, and will so keep their boys and girls in their confidence that they will have no secret from them. When they feel and know that they can come to mother with all their enquiries, and get honest recognition and teaching, they will not care to go elsewhere when curiosity is aroused and they desire knowledge on any point. This sweet confidence between mother and child cannot be too carefully nurtured.

There is an inborn curiosity concerning the physical being and its mysteries, and the child has a right to be met fairly in its questionings, and to be properly taught at the outset. Do not begin, dear young mothers by turning your children away, no matter how pertinent the question; neither begin with a semi-falsehood, or what is little worse or misleading, an entire one. Your children will learn, and if you do not teach them, some one else less fitted will. As soon as they are old enough to take in at least a part of the great truth, tell them what those organs are for, and how sacredly they should guard them, if they expect to become fathers and mothers, that will be a blessing to the world.

Children very early begin to question and as early they should receive intelligent, honest answers to their enquiries. Oh! that the element of gross impurity were removed from the knowledge of the sexual nature; and it will be when mothers have rightly learned the truth themselves, and so teach it to their children.

You can all the way along, teach your children sufficient to gratify their legitimate curiosity and serve as a safeguard against their tampering with their bodies in a way to do them harm. When you have taught them all you think they should know, if you have dealt with them in a frank way, and they have no reason to doubt your word, you will find them very easily satisfied with the remark, “This is all you can understand now, my dear, but as you get older and can understand better, come to mamma with all you want to know, and she will tell you.”

Fortify them also with this: “Never ask any of the boys and girls about these things, because there is a great deal said that is not true, and they will not tell you right, but come to mamma always, and this shall be our secret, that we will not tell any one else.” It is remarkable to see how this confidence generates pride in being able to have a secret with mamma and keeping it inviolate.

If there is the slightest tendency in your children to secret vice, do not allow them to sleep together in the same bed, as curiosity may lead them into danger. Keep them apart from other children, except as you are present with them, until you are sure they are old enough to be masters of themselves.

Should you discover in your children what might seem a tendency toward this evil you can do much to eradicate it by attending strictly to hygienic rules. Keep from their food all that is stimulating, as coffee, pepper, spices, pickles, or condiments of any kind. Give them plain food at regular hours; and before retiring, to make sure of a refreshing night’s sleep, give them a quick sponge bath of salt and water, rubbing well after with a coarse towel. The water should be only tepid, and the subsequent rubbing vigorous. In the morning a shower bath of cool water will insure good circulation, and if followed by a brisk rubbing, will add strength and tone.

Children who incline to this weakness are listless and disinclined to exercise. They must be encouraged to take all the outdoor exercise that they need, and everything should be done to encourage them in it. Above all, do not treat your child, even if the habit is formed before you discover it, as if he were a criminal. He is unfortunate, and ignorant of the wrong or the danger he is in. Lead him kindly away from the temptation and into strength by patient, kindly love and watchfulness, added to your truthful teaching.

Children, until they are old enough to be trusted, should not be out from under their mother’s watchful eye, or the care of a wise and trusted nurse, and never away with companions who are not known to be thoroughly trustworthy. When other children come to play with them they should not be left alone, but even their play should be directed, lest they get on dangerous ground.

Says Doctor Eldridge, in his book on _Self Enervation_, “An evil like this should receive far greater consideration at the hands of fathers and mothers, and even the medical man, than it hitherto has done. It is the solemn and imperative duty of every physician to warn parents of this danger to their offspring, and if possible to erect barriers against the tide of its destruction.”

Should you discover your child listless, and preferring solitude rather than companionship, averse to exercise, averted look, nervous, hypochondriacal, restless in sleep, constipated, pain in the back and lower extremities in the morning, appetite vacillating, hands cold and clammy; if you have not already been suspicious, watch carefully now, even though not half these symptoms are present. Another diagnostic symptom is this: The body emits a peculiar, disagreeable smell, and there is emaciation.

Some of the terrible results are epilepsy, idiocy, catalepsy and insanity. It has been discovered that out of eight hundred and sixteen cases of insanity in the New York State Insane Asylum, there were one hundred and seven addicted to this practice.

From their babyhood, be watchful of your children’s companions; allow no sensational books to be read; be sure of your helpers in their care; know where they are at all hours of the day and night; be patient and prayerful in their training; teach them truth, and keep their confidence, and you will be rewarded with strong, pure boys and girls, who can look into your eyes candidly and say, “Mamma, I am free from this habit which leads to so much misery.”