Part 27

Ἔδωκάν ποτε τῶν τοιούτων σκωμμάτων Ῥωμαίοις Ταραντῖνοι δίκας, [D] ὅτι μεθύοντες ἐν τοῖς Διονυσίοις ὕβρισαν αὐτῶν τὴν πρεσβείαν. ὑμεῖς δέ ἐστε τῶν Ταραντίνων τὰ πάντα εὐδαιμονέστεροι, ἀντὶ μὲν ὀλίγων ἡμερῶν ὅλον εὐπαθοῦντες ἐνιαυτόν, ἀντὶ δὲ τῶν ξένων πρέσβεων εἰς αὐτοὺς ἐξυβρίζοντες τοὺς ἄρχοντας καὶ τούτων εἰς τὰς ἐπὶ τοῦ γενείου τρίχας καὶ τὰ ἐν τοῖς νομίσμασι χαράγματα. [356] εὖ γε, ὦ πολῖται σώφρονες, οἵ τε παίζοντες τὰ τοιαῦτα καὶ οἱ τῶν παιζόντων ἀποδεχόμενοι καὶ ἀπολαύοντες. δῆλον γάρ, ὅτι τοῖς μὲν ἡδονὴν παρέχει τὸ λέγειν, τοὺς δὲ τὸ ἀκροᾶσθαι τῶν τοιούτων σκωμμάτων εὐφραίνει. ταύτης ὑμῖν ἐγὼ τῆς ὁμονοίας συνήδομαι, καὶ εὖ γε ποιεῖτε μία δὴ πόλις ὄντες τὰ τοιαῦτα, ὡς ἐκεῖνό γε οὐδαμοῦ σπουδαῖον οὐδὲ ζηλωτὸν εἴργειν [B] καὶ κολάζειν τῶν νέων τὸ ἀκόλαστον. παραιρεῖσθαι γάρ ἐστι καὶ ἀποθραύειν τῆς ἐλευθερίας τὸ κεφάλαιον, εἴ τις ἀφέλοιτο τοῦ λέγειν καὶ πράττειν ὅ,τι βούλονται τοὺς ἀνθρώπους. ὀρθῶς οὖν ὑμεῖς τοῦτο εἰδότες, ὅτι δεῖ τὰ πάντα ἐλευθέρους εἶναι, πρῶτον ἐπετρέψατε ταῖς γυναιξὶν ἄρχειν αὑτῶν, ἵνα ὑμῖν ὦσι λίαν ἐλεύθεραι καὶ ἀκόλαστοι, εἶτα ἐκείναις ξυνεχωρήσατε ἀνάγειν τὰ παιδία, [C] μή ποτε ὑμῖν ἀρχῆς πειρώμενα τραχυτέρας ἔπειτα ἀποφανθῇ δοῦλα, καὶ γενόμενα μειράκια πρῶτον αἰδεῖσθαι διδαχθῇ τοὺς πρεσβυτέρους, ὑπὸ δὲ τῆς οὕτω κακῆς συνηθείας εὐλαβέστερα γένηται πρὸς τοὺς ἄρχοντασ, καὶ τέλος οὐκ εἰς ἄνδρας, ἀλλ᾽ εἰς ἀνδράποδα τελέσαντες καὶ γενόμενοι σώφρονες καὶ ἐπιεικεῖς καὶ κόσμιοι λάθωσι διαφθαρέντες παντάπασι. τί οὖν αἱ γυναῖκες; ἐπὶ τὰ σφέτερα σεβάσματα ἄγουσιν αὐτὰ δι᾽ ἡδονῆς, ὃ δη μακαριώτατον εἶναι [D] φαίνεται καὶ πολυτίμητον οὐκ ἀνθρώποις μόνον, ἀλλὰ καὶ θηρίοις. ἔνθεν οἶμαι συμβαίνει μάλα ὑμῖν εὐδαίμοσιν εἶναι πᾶσαν ἀρνουμένοις δουλείαν, ἀπὸ τῆς εἰς τοὺς θεοὺς ἀρξαμένοις(751) πρῶτον, εἶτα τοὺς νόμους καὶ τρίτον τοὺς νομοφύλακας ἡμᾶς. ἄτοποί τε ἂν εἴημεν ἡμεῖς, εἰ τῶν θεῶν περιορώντων οὕτως ἐλευθέραν τὴν πόλιν καὶ οὐκ ἐπεξιόντων ἀγανακτοίημεν καὶ χαλεπαίνοιμεν. [357] εὖ γὰρ ἴστε ὅτι ταύτης ἡμῖν ἐκοινώνησαν οἱ θεοὶ τῆς ἀτιμίας παρὰ τῇ πόλει.

(Once upon a time the citizens of Tarentum paid to the Romans the penalty for this sort of jesting, seeing that, when drunk at the festival of Dionysus, they insulted the Roman ambassadors.(752) But you are in all respects more fortunate than the citizens of Tarentum, for you give yourselves up to pleasure throughout the whole year, instead of for a few days; and instead of foreign ambassadors you insult your own Sovereign, yes even the very hairs on his chin and the devices engraved on his coins.(753) Well done, O wise citizens, both ye who make such jests and ye who welcome and find profit in the jesters! For it is evident that uttering them gives pleasure to the former, while the latter rejoice to hear jests of this sort. I share your pleasure in this unanimity, and you do well to be a city of one mind in such matters, since it is not at all dignified or an enviable task to restrain and chastise the licentiousness of the young. For if one were to rob human beings of the power to do and say what they please, that would be to take away and curtail the first principle of independence. Therefore, since you knew that men ought to be independent in all respects, you acted quite rightly, in the first place when you permitted the women to govern themselves, so that you might profit by their being independent and licentious to excess; secondly, when you entrusted to them the bringing up of the children, for fear that if they had to experience any harsher authority they might later turn out to be slaves; and as they grew up to be boys might be taught first of all to respect their elders, and then under the influence of this bad habit might show too much reverence for the magistrates, and finally might have to be classed not as men but as slaves; and becoming temperate and well‐behaved and orderly might be, before they knew it, altogether corrupted. Then what effect have the women on the children? They induce them to reverence the same things as they do by means of pleasure, which is, it seems, the most blessed thing and the most highly honoured, not only by men but by beasts also. It is for this reason, I think, that you are so very happy, because you refuse every form of slavery; first you begin by refusing slavery to the gods, secondly to the laws, and thirdly to me who am the guardian of the laws. And I should indeed be eccentric if, when the gods suffer the city to be so independent and do not chastise her, I should be resentful and angry. For be assured that the gods have shared with me in the disrespect that has been shown to me in your city.)

Τὸ Χῖ, φασίν, οὐδὲν ἠδίκησε τὴν πόλιν οὐδὲ τὸ Κάππα. τί μέν ἐστι τοῦτο τῆς ὑμετέρας σοφίας τὸ αἴνιγμα ξυνεῖναι χαλεπόν, τυχόντες δ᾽ ἡμεῖς ἐξηγητῶν ἀπὸ τῆς ὑμετέρας πόλεως ἐδιδάχθημεν ἀρχὰς ὀνομάτων εἶναι τὰ γράμματα, δηλοῦν δ᾽ ἐθέλειν τὸ μὲν Χριστόν, τὸ δὲ Κωνστάντιον. ἀνέχεσθε οὖν [B] μου λέγοντος μετὰ παρρησίας. ἓν μόνον ὑμᾶς ὁ Κωνστάντιος ἠδίκησεν, ὅτι με καίσαρα ποιήσας οὐκ ἀπέκτεινεν· ὡς τά γε ἄλλα ὑμῖν μόνοις ἐκ πάντων Ῥωμαίων πολλῶν δοῖεν οἱ θεοὶ Κωνσταντίων πειραθῆναι, μᾶλλον δὲ τῶν ἐκείνου φίλων τῆς πλεονεξίας. ἐμοὶ γὰρ ὁ ἀνὴρ καὶ ἀνεψιὸς ἐγένετο καὶ φίλος. ἐπεὶ δὲ πρὸ τῆς φιλίας εἵλετο τὴν ἔχθραν, εἶτα ἡμῖν οἱ θεοὶ τὸν πρὸς ἀλλήλους ἀγῶνα λίαν ἐβράβευσαν φιλανθρώπως, [C] ἐγενόμην αὐτῷ πιστότερος φίλος ἢ προσεδόκησεν ἕξειν με πρῖν ἐχθρὸν γενέσθαι. τί οὖν οἴεσθέ με τοῖς ἐκείνου λυπεῖν ἐγκωμίοις, ὃς ἄχθομαι τοῖς λοιδορουμένοις αὐτῷ; Χριστὸν δὲ ἀγαπῶντες ἔχετε πολιοῦχον ἀντὶ τοῦ Διὸς καὶ τοῦ Δαφναίου καὶ τῆς Καλλιίπης, ἣ τὸ σόφισμα ὑμῶν ἀπεγύμνωσεν. Ἐμισηνοὶ Χριστὸν ἐπόθουν οἱ πῦρ ἐμβαλόντες τοῖς τάφοις τῶν Γαλιλαίων; ἐλύπησα δ᾽ ἐγὼ τίνας Ἐμισηνῶν πώποτε; [D] ὑμῶν μέντοι πολλοὺς καὶ ὀλίγου δέω φάναι πάντας, τὴν βουλήν, τοὺς εὐπόρους, τὸν δῆμον. ὁ μὲν γὰρ δῆμος ἄχθεταί μοι τῷ πλείστῳ μέρει, μᾶλλον δ᾽ ἅπας ἀθεότητα προελόμενος, ὅτι τοῖς πατρίοις ὁρᾷ τῆς ἁγιστείας θεσμοῖς προσκείμενον, οἱ δὲ δυνατοὶ κωλυόμενοι πολλοῦ πάντα πωλεῖν ἀργυρίου, πάντες δὲ ὑπὲρ τῶν ὀρχηστῶν καὶ τῶν θεάτρων, οὐχ ὅτι τοὺς ἄλλους ἀποστερῶ τούτων, [358] ἀλλ᾽ ὅτι μέλει μοι τῶν τοιούτων ἧττον ἢ τῶν ἐν τοῖς τέλμασι βατράχων. εἶτα οὐκ εἰκότως ἐμαυτοῦ κατηγορῶ τοσαύτας ἀπεχθείας λαβὰς παρασχόντος;

(“The _Chi_,” say the citizens, “never harmed the city in any way, nor did the _Kappa_.” Now the meaning of this riddle which your wisdom has invented is hard to understand, but I obtained interpreters from your city and I was informed that these are the first letters of names, and that the former is intended to represent Christ, the latter Constantius. Bear with me then, if I speak frankly. In one thing Constantius did harm you, in that when he had appointed me as Caesar he did not put me to death. Now for the rest may the gods grant to you alone out of all the many citizens of Rome to have experience of the avarice of many a Constantius, or I should say rather, of the avarice of his friends. For the man was my cousin and dear to me; but after he had chosen enmity with me instead of friendship, and then the gods with the utmost benevolence arbitrated our contention with one another, I proved myself a more loyal friend to him than he had expected to find me before I became his enemy. Then why do you think that you are annoying me by your praises of him, when I am really angry with those who slander him? But as for Christ you love him, you say, and adopt him as the guardian of your city instead of Zeus and the god of Daphne and Calliope(754) who revealed your clever invention? Did those citizens of Emesa long for Christ who set fire to the tombs of the Galilaeans?(755) But what citizens of Emesa have I ever annoyed? I have however annoyed many of you, I may almost say all, the Senate, the wealthy citizens, the common people. The latter indeed, since they have chosen atheism, hate me for the most part, or rather all of them hate me because they see that I adhere to the ordinances of the sacred rites which our forefathers observed; the powerful citizens hate me because they are prevented from selling everything at a high price; but all of you hate me on account of the dancers and the theatres. Not because I deprive others of these pleasures, but because I care less for things of that sort than for frogs croaking in a pond.(756) Then is it not natural for me to accuse myself, when I have furnished so many handles for your hatred?)

Ἀλλ᾽ ὁ Ῥωμαῖος Κάτων, ὅπως μὲν ἔχων πώγωνος οὐκ οἶδα, παρ᾽ ὁντινοῦν δὲ τῶν ἐπὶ σωφροσύνῃ καὶ μεγαλοψυχίᾳ καὶ τὸ μέγιστον ἀνδρείᾳ μέγα φρονούντων ἄξιος ἐπαινεῖσθαι, προσιὼν τῇδε τῇ πολυανθρώπῳ καὶ τρυφερᾷ καὶ πλουσίᾳ πόλει [B] τοὺς ἐφήβους ἰδὼν ἐν τῷ προαστείῳ μετὰ τῶν ἀρχόντων ἐσταλμένους ὡς ἐπί τινα δορυφορίαν ἐνόμισεν αὑτοῦ χάριν ὑμῶν τοὺς προγόνους τὴν παρασκευὴν πᾶσαν πεποιῆσθαι· καὶ θᾶσσον ἀποβὰς τοῦ ἵππου προῆγεν ἅμα καὶ πρὸς τοὺς προλαβόντας τῶν φίλων δυσχεραίνων ὡς μηνυτὰς γενομένους αὐτοῖς, ὅτι Κάτων προσάγει, καὶ ἀναπείσαντας ἐκδραμεῖν. ὄντος δ᾽ ἐν τοιούτοις αὐτοῦ καὶ διαποροῦντος ἠρέμα καὶ ἐρυθριῶντος, ὁ γυμνασίαρχος προσδραμών, Ὦ ξένε, ἔφη, [C] ποῦ Δημήτριος; ἦν δ᾽ οὗτος ἀπελεύθερος Πομπηίου, κεκτημένος οὐσίαν πολλὴν πάνυ· μέτρον δ᾽ αὐτῆς εἰ ποθεῖτε μαθεῖν· οἶμαι γὰρ ὑμᾶς ἐκ πάντων τῶν λεγομένων πρὸς ταύτην μάλιστα ὡρμῆσθαι τὴν ἀκοήν· ἐγὼ τὸν εἰπόντα φράσω. Δαμοφίλῳ τῷ Βιθυνῷ πεποίηται συγγράμματα τοιαῦτα, ἐν οἷς δρεπόμενος ἐκ βίβλων πολλῶν(757) εἰργάσατο [D] λόγους ἡδίστους νέῳ φιληκόῳ καὶ πρεσβυτέρῳ· φιλεῖ γὰρ τὸ γῆρας ἐπανάγειν αὖθις εἰς τὴν τῶν νέων φιληκοΐαν τοὺς ἀφηλικεστέρους· ὅθεν οἶμαι συμβαίνει νέους καὶ πρεσβύτας ἐξ ἴσης εἶναι φιλομύθους· εἶεν. ὁ δὲ δὴ Κάτων ὅπως ἀπήντησε τῷ γυμνασιάρχῳ βούλεσθε φράσω; μή με λοιδορεῖν ὑπολάβητε τὴν πόλιν· οὐκ ἔστιν ὁ λόγος ἐμός. εἴ τις ἀφῖκται [359] περιφερομένη καὶ εἰς ὑμᾶς ἀκοὴ Χαιρωνέως ἀνδρὸς ἐκ τοῦ φαύλου γένους, ὁ δὴ λέγεται παρὰ τῶν ἀλαζόνων φιλόσοφον· οὗ δὴ καὶ αὐτὸς οὐκ ἐφικόμην μέν, ηὐξάμην δὲ ὑπὸ ἀμαθίας κοινωνῆσαι καὶ μετασχεῖν. ταῦτα οὖν ἐκεῖνος ἔφρασεν, ὡς ὁ Κάτων ἀπεκρίνατο μὲν οὐδέν, βοήσας δὲ μόνον οἷά τις ἔμπληκτος καὶ ἀνόητος ἄνθρωπος, Ὢ τῆς κακοδαίμονος πόλεως, ἀπιὼν ᾤχετο.

(Cato the Roman,(758) however,—how he wore his beard I do not know,(759) but he deserves to be praised in comparison with anyone of those who pride themselves on their temperance and nobility of soul and on their courage above all,—he, I say, once visited this populous and luxurious and wealthy city; and when he saw the youths in the suburb drawn up in full array, and with them the magistrates, as though for some military display, he thought your ancestors had made all those preparations in his honour. So he quickly dismounted from his horse and came forward, though at the same time he was vexed with those of his friends who had preceded him for having informed the citizens that Cato was approaching, and so induced them to hasten forth. And while he was in this position, and was slightly embarrassed and blushing, the master of the gymnasium ran to meet him and called out “Stranger, where is Demetrius?” Now this Demetrius was a freedman of Pompey, who had acquired a very large fortune; and if you want to know the amount of it,—for I suppose that in all that I am now telling you are most anxious to hear this,—I will tell you who has related the story. Damophilus of Bithynia has written compositions of this sort, and in them, by culling ancedotes from many books, he has produced tales that give the greatest delight to anyone who loves to listen to gossip, whether he be young or old. For old age usually revives in the elderly that love of gossip which is natural to the young; and this is, I think, the reason why both the old and the young are equally fond of stories. Well then, to return to Cato. Do you want me to tell you how he greeted the master of the gymnasium? Do not imagine that I am slandering your city; for the story is not my own.(760) If any rumour has come round, even to your ears, of the man of Chaeronea,(761) who belongs to that worthless class of men who are called by impostors philosophers,—I myself never attained to that class though in my ignorance I claimed to be a member of it and to have part in it,—well he, as I was saying, related that Cato answered not a word, but only cried aloud like a man stricken with madness and out of his senses, “Alas for this ill‐fated city!” and took himself off.)

Μὴ δὴ θαυμάσητε, τοῦτο εἰ καὶ ἐγὼ νυνὶ πάσχω πρὸς ὑμᾶς, [B] ἀνὴρ ἀγριώτερος ἐκείνου καὶ θρασύτερος τοσούτῳ καὶ αὐθαδέστερος, ὅσον οἱ Κελτοὶ Ῥωμαίων. ὁ μὲν γὰρ ἐκεῖσε τεχθεὶς ἐγγὺς ἦλθε γήρως ἅμα τοῖς πολίταις τρεφόμενος· ἐμοὶ δὲ Κελτοὶ καὶ Γερμανοὶ καὶ δρυμὸς Ἑρκύνιος ἔμελεν ἄρτι πρῶτον εἰς ἄνδρας τελοῦντι, καὶ διέτριψα πολὺν ἤδη χρόνον, ὥσπερ τις κυνηγέτης ἀγρίοις ὁμιλῶν καὶ συμπλεκόμενος θηρίοις, [C] ἤθεσιν ἐντυγχάνων οὔτε θοπεύειν οὔτε κολακεύειν εἰδόσιν, ἁπλῶς δὲ καὶ ἐλευθέρως ἐκ τοῦ ἴσου πᾶσι προσφέρεσθαι. γέγονεν οὖν μοι μετὰ τὴν ἐκ παίδον τροφὴν ἥ τε ἐν μειρακίοις ὁδὸς διὰ τῶν Πλάτωνος καὶ Ἀριστοτέλους λόγων οὐδαμῶς ἐπιτηδείων δήμοις ἐντυγχάνειν οἰομένοις ὑπὸ τρυφῆς εὐδαιμονεστάτοις(762) εἶναι, ἥ τε ἐν ἀνδράσιν αὐτουργία παρὰ τοῖς μαχιμωτάτοις καὶ θυνικωτάτοις τῶν ἐθνῶν, ὅπου τὴν γαμηλίαν Ἀφροδίτην καὶ τὸν μεθυδότην Διόνυσον γάμου τε ἕνεκα καὶ παιδοποιίας οἴνου τε ὁπόσης ἑκάστῳ δυνατὸν πόσεως ἴσασι μόνον. [D] ἀσέλγεια δ᾽ οὐκ ἔστιν ἐν τοῖς θεάτροις οὐδὲ ὕβρις, οὐδὲ ἕλκει τις εἴσω τῆς σκηνῆς τὸν κόρδακα.

(Therefore do not be surprised if I now feel towards you as I do, for I am more uncivilised than he, and more fierce and headstrong in proportion as the Celts are more so than the Romans. He was born in Rome and was nurtured among Roman citizens till he was on the threshold of old age. But as for me, I had to do with Celts and Germans and the Hercynian forest(763) from the moment that I was reckoned a grown man, and I have by now spent a long time there, like some huntsman who associates with and is entangled among wild beasts. There I met with temperaments that know not how to pay court or flatter, but only how to behave simply and frankly to all men alike. Then after my nurture in childhood, my path as a boy took me through the discourses of Plato and Aristotle, which are not at all suited for the reading of communities who think that on account of their luxury they are the happiest of men. Then I had to work hard myself among the most warlike and high‐spirited of all nations, where men have knowledge of Aphrodite, goddess of Wedlock, only for the purpose of marrying and having children, and know Dionysus the Drink‐Giver, only for the sake of just so much wine as each can drink at a draught. And in their theatres no licentiousness or insolence exists, nor does any man dance the cordax on their stage.)

Λέγεταί τοι μικρῷ πρόσθεν ὡς ἐνθένδε ἐκεῖσέ τις Καππαδόκης φυγάς, ἐν τῇ παρ᾽ ὑμῖν τραφεὶς πόλει παρὰ τῷ χρυσοχίῳ· γνωρίζετε δήπουθεν ὃν λέγω· μαθὼν ὅπου καὶ ἔμαθεν, ὡς οὐ δέον ὁμιλεῖν γυναιξί, μειρακίοις δ᾽ ἐπιχειρεῖν, οὐκ οἶδα ὁπόσα ἐνθάδε δράσας καὶ παθών, [360]ἐπειδὴ παρὰ τὸν ἐκεῖσε βασιλέα πρῴην ἀφίκετο, μνήμῃ τῶν τῇδε πολλοὺς μὲν ὀρχηστὰς αὐτοῖς ἐπαγαγεῖν, ἄλλα δὲ τὰ ἐντεῦθεν ἀγαθὰ τοιαῦτα, καὶ δή καὶ τέλος ὡς ἐνεδέησεν ἔτι κοτυλιστοῦ· τοῦτο δ᾽ ὑμεῖς ἴστε πρὸς τῷ ἔργῳ τὸ ὄνομα· καὶ τοῦτον ἐνθένδε ἐκάλει πόθῳ καὶ ἔρωτι τῆς σεμνῆς παρ᾽ ὑμῖν διαίτης. οἱ Κελτοὶ δὲ τὸν μὲν κοτυλιστὴν ἠγνόησαν, [B] ἐδέξατο γὰρ αὐτὸν αὐτίκα τὰ βασίλεια, τοὺς ὀρχηστὰς δὲ ἐπιτραπέντας ἐπιδείκνυσθαι(764) ἐν τῷ θεάτρῳ τὴν τέχνην εἴασαν οἰόμενοι τοῖς νυμφολήπτοις αὐτοὺς ἐοικέναι. καὶ ἦν αὐτοῖς ἐκεῖ παραπλησίως ἐμοὶ καταγελαστότατον τὸ θέατρον· ἀλλ᾽ οἱ μὲν ὀλίγοι πολλῶν κατεγέλων, ἐγὼ δὲ ξὺν ὀλίγοις ἐνθάδε γελοῖος ὑμῖν ἅπασι τὰ πάντα φαίνομαι.

(A story is told of them that not long ago a certain Cappadocian was exiled from here to that place, a man who had been brought up in your city in the house of the goldsmith—you know of course whom I mean,—and had learned, as he naturally did learn there, that one ought not to have intercourse with women but to pay attentions to youths. And when, after doing and suffering here I know not what, he went to the court of the king in that country, he took with him to remind him of your habits here a number of dancers and other such delights from this city; and then finally since he still needed a cotylist(765)—you know the word and the thing too—he invited him also from here, because of his longing and love for the austere mode of life that prevails with you. Now the Celts never made the acquaintance of the cotylist, since he was at once admitted into the palace; but when the dancers began to display their art in the theatre, the Celts left them alone because they thought that they were like men stricken with nympholepsy. And the theatre seemed to the men in that country highly ridiculous, just as it does to me; but whereas the Celts were a few ridiculing many, I here along with a few others seem absurd in every way to all of you.)

[C] Καὶ οὐκ ἀγανακτῶ τῷ πράγματι. καὶ γὰρ ἂν εἴην ἄδικος εἰ μὴ καὶ τοῖς παροῦσι στέργοιμι, διαφερόντως ἀσπασάμενος ἐκεῖνα. Κελτοὶ μὲν γὰρ οὕτω με δι᾽ ὁμοιότητα τρόπων ἠγάπησαν, ὥστε ἐτόλμησαν οὐχ ὅπλα μόνον ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ λαβεῖν, ἀλλὰ καὶ χρήματα ἔδωκαν πολλά, καὶ παραιτούμενον ὀλίγου καὶ ἐβιάσαντο λαβεῖν, καὶ πρὸς πάντα ἑτοίμως ὑπήκουσαν. ὃ δὲ δὴ μέγιστον, ἐκεῖθεν εἰς ὑμᾶς ἐφέρετο πολὺ τὸ ἐμὸν ὄνομα, καὶ ἐβόων πάντες ἀνδρεῖον, συνετόν, δίκαιον, οὐ πολέμῳ μόνον ὁμιλῆσαι δεινόν, [D] ἀλλὰ καὶ εἴρηνῃ χρήσασθαι δεξιόν, εὐπρόσιτον, πρᾷον· ὑμεῖς δὲ αὐτοῖς ἀντιδεδώκατε νῦν ἐνθένδε πρῶτον μέν, ὅτι παρ᾽ ἐμὲ τὰ τοῦ κόσμου πράγματα ἀνατέτραπται· σύνοιδα δὲ οὐδὲν ἀνατρέπων ἐμαυτῷ οὔτε ἑκὼν οὔτε ἄκων· εἶτα, ὡς ἐκ τοῦ πώγωνός μου χρὴ πλέκειν σχοινία, καὶ ὅτι πολεμῶ τῷ Χῖ, πόθος δὲ ὑμᾶς εἴσεισι τοῦ Κάππα. καὶ ὑμῖν γε αὐτὸ οἱ πολιοῦχοι τῆσδε τῆς πόλεως θεοὶ διπλοῦν δοῖεν, ὅτι πρὸς τούτῳ [361] καὶ τὰς ἀστυγείτονας ἐσυκοφαντήσατε πόλεις ἱερὰς καὶ ὁμοδούλους ἐμοί, ὡς δὴ παρ᾽ αὐτῶν εἴη τὰ εἰς ἐμὲ ξυντεθέντα, ὃν εὖ οἶδ᾽ ὅτι φιλοῦσιν ἐκεῖναι μᾶλλον ἢ τοὺς ἑαυτῶν υἱέας, οἳ τὰ μὲν τῶν θεῶν ἀνέστησαν αὐτίκα τεμένη, τοὺς τάφους δὲ τῶν ἀθέων ἀνέτρεψαν πάντας. ἀπὸ τοῦ συνθήματος, ὃ δὴ δέδοται παρ᾽ ἐμοῦ πρῴην, οὕτως ἐπαρθέντες τὸν νοῦν καὶ μετέωροι γενόμενοι τὴν διάνοιαν, ὡς καὶ πλέον ἐπεξελθεῖν τοῖς [B] εἰς τοὺς θεοὺς πλημμελοῦσιν ἢ βουλομένῳ μοι ἦν.

(This is a fact which I do not resent. And indeed it would be unjust of me not to make the best of the present state of things, after having so greatly enjoyed the life among the Celts. For they loved me so much, on account of the similarity of our dispositions, that not only did they venture to take up arms on my behalf, but they gave me large sums of money besides; and when I would have declined it, they almost forced me to take it, and in all things readily obeyed me. And what was most wonderful of all, a great report of me travelled thence to your city, and all men proclaimed loudly that I was brave, wise and just, not only terrible to encounter in war, but also skilful in turning peace to account, easy of access and mild‐tempered. But now you have sent them tidings from here in return, that in the first place the affairs of the whole world have been turned upside down by me—though indeed I am not conscious of turning anything upside down, either voluntarily or involuntarily; secondly, that I ought to twist ropes from my beard, and that I war against the _Chi_ and that you begin to regret the _Kappa_. Now may the guardian gods of this city grant you a double allowance of the _Kappa_!(766) For besides this you falsely accused the neighbouring cities, which are holy and the slaves of the gods, like myself, of having produced the satires which were composed against me; though I know well that those cities love me more than their own sons, for they at once restored the shrines of the gods and overturned all the tombs(767) of the godless, on the signal that was given by me the other day; and so excited were they in mind and so exalted in spirit that they even attacked those who were offending against the gods with more violence than I could have wished.)

Τὰ δ᾽ ὑμέτερα· πολλοὶ μὲν ἐγειρομένους ἄρτι τοὺς βωμοὺς ἀνέτρεψαν, οὓς ἡ πρᾳότης ἡμῶν ἐδίδαξε μόλις ἡσυχάζειν. ἐπεὶ δὲ ἀπεπεμψάμεθα τὸν νεκρὸν τῆς Δάφνης, οἱ μὲν ἀφοσιούμενοι τὰ πρὸς τοὺς θεοὺς ἐξ ὑμῶν ἀντέδωκαν τοῖς ὑπὲρ τῶν λειψάνων ἠγανακτηκόσι [C] τοῦ νεκροῦ τὸ τέμενος τοῦ Δαφναίου θεοῦ, οἱ δὲ εἴτε λαθόντες εἴτε μὴ τὸ πῦρ ἐνεῖσαν(768) ἐκεῖνο, τοῖς μὲν ἐπιδημοῦσι τῶν ξένων φρικῶδες, ὑμῶν δὲ τῷ δήμῳ μὲν ἡδονὴν παρασχόν, ὑπὸ δὲ τῆς βουλῆς ἀμεληθὲν καὶ εἰσέτι ἀμελούμενον. ἐμοὶ μὲν οὖν ἐδόκει καὶ πρὸ τοῦ πυρὸς ἀπολελοιπέναι τὸν νεὼν ὁ θεός, ἐπεσήμηνε γὰρ εἰσελθόντι μοι πρῶτον τὸ ἄγαλμα, καὶ τούτου μάρτυρα καλῶ τὸν μέγαν Ἥλιον πρὸς τοὺς ἀπιστοῦντας, ὑμᾶς δὲ ὑπομνῆσαι βούλομαι καὶ ἄλλης ἀπεχθείας εμῆς, [D] ἔπειτα, ὅπερ εἴωθα ποιεῖν ἐπιεικῶς, ὀνειδίσαι ἐμαυτῷ καὶ ὑπὲρ ταύτης καὶ κατηγορῆσαι καὶ μέμψασθαι.

(But now consider your own behaviour. Many of you overturned the altars of the gods which had only just been erected, and with difficulty did my indulgent treatment teach you to keep quiet. And when I sent away the body from Daphne,(769) some of you, in expiation of your conduct towards the gods, handed over the shrine of the god of Daphne to those who were aggrieved about the relics of the body, and the rest of you, whether by accident or on purpose, hurled against the shrine that fire which made the strangers who were visiting your city shudder, but gave pleasure to the mass of your citizens and was ignored and is still ignored by your Senate. Now, in my opinion, even before that fire the god had forsaken the temple, for when I first entered it his holy image gave me a sign thereof. I call mighty Helios to bear me witness of this before all unbelievers. And now I wish to remind you of yet another reason for your hatred of me, and then to abuse myself—a thing which I usually do fairly well—and both to accuse and blame myself with regard to that hatred.)

Δεκάτῳ γάρ που μηνὶ τῷ παρ᾽ ὑμῖν ἀριθμουμένῳ· Λῶον οἶμαι τοῦτον ὑμεῖς προσαγορεύετε· τοῦ θεοῦ τούτου πάτριός ἐστιν ἑορτή, καὶ ἔδει σπουδῇ πρὸς τὴν Δάφνην ἀπαντᾶν. ἐγὼ μὲν οὖν ἀπὸ τοῦ Κασίου Διὸς ἐπὶ τοῦτο ἔδραμον, οἰόπμενος ἐνταῦθα μάλιστα τοῦ πλούτου καὶ τῆς φιλοτιμίας ὑμῶν ἀπολαύσειν. εἶτα ἀνέπλαττον παρ᾽ ἐμαυτῷ πομπήν, [362] ὥσπερ ὀνείρατα ὁρῶν, ἱερεῖα καὶ σπονδὰς καὶ χοροὺς τῷ θεῷ καὶ θυμιάματα καὶ τοὺς ἐφήβους ἐκεῖ περὶ τὸ τέμενος θεοπρεπέστατα μὲν τὰς ψυχὰς κατεσκευασμένους, λευκῇ δ᾽ ἐσθῆτι καὶ μεγαλοπρεπεῖ κεκοσμημένους. ὡς δὲ εἴσω παρῆλθον τοῦ τεμένους, οὔτε θυμιάματα κατέλαβον οὔτε πόπανον οὔτε ἱερεῖον. αὐτίκα μὲν οὖν ἐθαύμασα καὶ ᾤμην ἔξω τοῦ τεμένους εἶναι, περιμένειν δ᾽ ὑμᾶς, [B] ἐμὲ δὴ τιμῶντας ὡς ἀρχιερέα, τὸ σύνθημα παρ᾽ ἐμοῦ. ἐπεὶ δὲ ἠρόμην, τί μέλλει θύειν ἡ πόλις ἐνιαύσιον ἑορτὴν ἄγουσα τῷ θεῷ, ὁ ἱερεὺς εἶπεν· ἐγὼ μὲν ἥκω φέρων οἴκοθεν τῷ θεῷ χῆνα ἱερεῖον, ἡ πόλις δὲ τὰ νῦν οὐδὲν ηὐτέεπισται.