SCENE II.

_Venice.--A street._

_Enter at several doors_ ABIGAIL _and_ THAIS.

_Abi._ Thais, you're an early riser. I have that to show will make your hair stand an-end.[215]

_Tha._ Well, lady, and I have that to show you will bring your courage down. What would you say and I would name a party saw your husband court, kiss, nay, almost go through for the hole?

_Abi._ How, how? what would I say? nay, by this light! what would I not do? If ever Amazon fought better, or more at the face than I'll do, let me never be thought a new married wife. Come, unmask her; 'tis some admirable creature, whose beauty you need not paint; I warrant you, 'tis done to your hand. 12

_Tha._ Would any woman but I be abused to her face? Prithee read the contents. Know'st thou the character?

_Abi._ 'Tis my husband's hand, and a love-letter; but for the contents I find none in it. Has the lustful monster, all back and belly, starved me thus? What defect does he see in me? I'll be sworn, wench, I am of as pliant and yielding a body to him, e'en which way he will--he may turn me as he list himself. What? and dedicate to thee! Ay, marry, here's a stile so high as a man cannot help a dog o'er it. He was wont to write to me in the city-phrase, _My good Abigail._ Here's _astonishment of nature, unparallel'd excellency, and most unequal rarity of creation_!--three such words will turn any honest woman in the world[216] whore; for a woman is never won till she know not what to answer; and beshrew me if I understand any of these. You are the party, I perceive, and here's a white sheet, that your husband has promis'd me to do penance in: you must not think to dance the shaking of the sheets[217] alone; though there be not such rare phrases in 't, 'tis more to the matter: a legible hand, but for the dash or the (he) and (as):[218] short bawdy parentheses as ever you saw, to the purpose; he has not left out a prick, I warrant you, wherein he has promis'd to do me any good; but the law's in mine own hand. 36

_Tha._ I ever thought by his red beard he would prove a Judas;[219] here am I bought and sold; he makes much of me indeed. Well, wench, we were best wisely in time seek for prevention; I should be loath to take drink and die on 't, as I am afraid I shall, that he will lie with thee.

_Abi._ To be short, sweetheart, I'll be true to thee, though a liar to my husband. I have signed your husband's bill like a woodcock, as he is held; persuaded him (since naught but my love can assuage his violent passions) he should enjoy, like a private friend, the pleasures of my bed. I told him my husband was to go to Maurano to-day, to renew a farm he has; and in the meantime he might be tenant at will to use mine. This false fire has so took with him, that he's ravish'd afore he come. I have had stones on him all red. Dost know this?

_Tha._ Ay, too well; it blushes, for his master. 53

[_Points to the ring._

_Abi._ Now my husband will be hawking about thee anon, and thou canst meet him closely.

_Tha._ By my faith, I would be loth in the dark, and he knew me.

_Abi._ I mean thus: the same occasion will serve him too; they are birds of a feather, and will fly together, I warrant thee, wench; appoint him to come; say that thy husband's gone for Maurano, and tell me anon if thou madest not his heart-blood spring for joy in his face. 62

_Tha._ I conceive you not all this while.

_Abi._ Then th' art a barren woman, and no marvel if thy husband love thee not. The hour for both to come is six--a dark time fit for purblind lovers; and with cleanly conveyance by the nigglers our maids, they shall be translated into our bed-chambers. Your husband into mine, and mine into yours.

_Tha._ But you mean they shall come in at the backdoors? 71

_Abi._ Who? our husbands? nay, an' they come not in at the fore-doors there will be no pleasure in 't. But we two will climb over our garden-pales, and come in that way (the chastest that are in Venice will stray for a good turn), and thus wittily will we be stowed--you into my house to your husband, and I into your house to my husband; and I warrant thee before a month come to an end, they'll crack louder of this night's lodging than the bedsteads. 80

_Tha._ All is if our maids keep secret.

_Abi._ Mine is a maid I'll be sworn; she has kept her secrets hitherto.

_Tha._ Troth, and I never had any sea-captain boarded in my house.

_Abi._ Go to, then; and the better to avoid suspicion, thus we must insist: they must come up darkling, recreate themselves with their delight an hour or two, and after a million kisses or so-- 89

_Tha._ But is my husband content to come darkling?

_Abi._ What, not to save mine honour? He that will run through fire, as he has profess'd, will, by the heat of his love, grope in the dark! I warrant him he shall save mine honour.

_Tha._ I am afraid my voice will discover me.

_Abi._ Why, then, you're best say nothing, and take it thus quietly when your husband comes.

_Tha._ Ay, but you know a woman cannot choose but speak in these cases.

Abi. Bite in your nether-lip, and I warrant you; 100 Or make as if you were whiffing tobacco; Or puich[220] like me. Gods so! I hear thy husband!

[_Exit_ ABIGAIL.

_Tha._ Farewell, wise woman.

_Enter_ ROGERO.[221]

_Rog._[222] Now 'gins my vengeance mount high in my lust: 'Tis a rare creature, she'll do 't i'faith; And I am arm'd at all points. A rare whiblin,[223] To be revenged, and yet gain pleasure in 't, One height above revenge! Yet what a slave am I! Are there not younger brothers enough, but we must Branch one another? O but mine's revenge! 110 And who on that does dream Must be a tyrant ever in extreme.-- O my wife Thais, get my breakfast ready; I must into the country to my farm I have Some two miles off, and, as I think, Shall not come home to-night. Jaques, Jaques? Get my vessel ready to row me down the river. Prithee make haste, sweet girl.

[_Exit_ ROGERO.[224]

_Tha._ So, there's one fool shipp'd away. Are your cross-points discovered? Get your breakfast ready! 120 By this light I'll tie you to hard fare; I have been too sparing of that you prodigally offer voluntary to another: well, you will be a tame fool hereafter, The finest light is when we first defraud; Husband, to-night 'tis I must lie abroad.

[_Exit._

[215] "And each particular hair to stand _an-end_".--_Hamlet_, i. 4.

[216] Ed. 1631 "_a_ whore."

[217] "The shaking of the sheets" was the name of an old dance. It is often used with a quibble (as in the text).

[218] I follow the reading of the old copies.

[219] In tapestry Judas was commonly represented with a red beard.

[220] Puke, simper.

[221] Old eds. "MIZALDUS."

[222] Old eds. "_Miz._"

[223] This word is used in a variety of senses: see Nares' _Gloss._ Here the meaning seems to be "device, trick." We have had the word "quiblin" in this sense: see p. 60. [Transcriber's Note: Footnote [64]]

[224] Old eds. "MIZAL."