Chapter 3

_The_ SCENE _changes, and_ TRICE _is discovered playing at tables by himself, with spectacles on, a bottle, and parmezan by him; they return and see him, undiscovered by him_.

_Trice_. Cinque and quatre: My cinque I play here, sir; my quatre here, sir: Now for you, sir: But first I'll drink to you, sir; upon my faith I'll do you reason, sir: Mine was thus full, sir! Pray mind your play, sir:--Size ace I have thrown: I'll play 'em at length, sir.

--Will you, sir? Then you have made a blot sir; I'll try if I can enter: I have hit you, sir.

--I think you can cog a dye, sir.

--I cog a dye, sir? I play as fair as you, or any man.

--You lie, sir.

--How! lie, sir? I'll teach you what 'tis to give a gentleman the lie, sir.

[_Throws down the tables_.

[_They all laugh and discover themselves_.

_Isa_. Is this your serious business?

_Trice_. O you rogue, are you there? You are welcome, huswife; and so are you, Constance, _Fa tol de re tol de re la_. [_Claps their backs_.

_Isa_. Pr'ythee be not so rude, Trice.

_Trice_. Huswife Constance, I'll have you into my larder, and shew you my provision: I have cockles, dainty fat cockles, that came in the night; if they had seen the day, I would not have given a fart for 'em. I would the king had 'em.

_Const_. He has as good, I warrant you.

_Trice_. Nay, that's a lie. I could sit and cry for him sometimes; he does not know what 'tis to eat a good meal in a whole year. His cooks are asses: I have a delicate dish of ruffs to dinner, sirrah.

_Const_. To dinner!

_Trice_. To dinner! why by supper they had been past their prime. I'll tell thee the story of 'em: I have a friend--

_Enter Servant_.

_Serv_. Sir, dinner's upon the table.

_Trice_. Well, well; I have a friend, as I told you--

_Serv_. Dinner stays, sir: 'tis dinner that stays: Sure he will hear now.

_Trice_. I have a friend, as I told you--

_Isa_. I believe he's your friend, you are so loth to part with him.

_Trice_. Away, away;--I'll tell you the story between the courses. Go you to the cook immediately, sirrah; and bring me word what we have to supper, before we go to dinner: I love to have the satisfaction of the day before me. [_Exeunt_.