SCENE II.--WOODALL _and_ TRICKSY _discovered in the Garden-house.

_Enter_ GERVASE _to them._

_Gerv._ Make haste, and save yourself, sir; the enemy's at hand: I have discovered him from the corner, where you set me sentry.

_Wood._ Who is it?

_Gerv._ Who should it be, but Limberham? armed with a two-hand fox. O Lord, O Lord!

_Trick._ Enter quickly into the still-house, both of you, and leave me to him: There is a spring-lock within, to open it when we are gone.

_Wood._ Well, I have won the party and revenge, however: A minute longer, and I had won the tout. [_They go in: She locks the Door._

_Enter_ LIMBERHAM, _with a great Sword._

_Limb._ Disloyal Pug!

_Trick._ What humour is this? you are drunk, it seems: Go sleep.

_Limb._ Thou hast robbed me of my repose for ever: I am like Macbeth, after the death of good king Duncan; methinks a voice says to me,--Sleep no more; Tricksy has murdered sleep.

_Trick._ Now I find it: You are willing to save your settlement, and are sent by some of your wise counsellors, to pick a quarrel with me.

_Limb._ I have been your cully above these seven years; but, at last, my eyes are opened to your witchcraft; and indulgent heaven has taken care of my preservation. In short, madam, I have found you out; and, to cut off preambles, produce your adulterer.

_Trick._ If I have any, you know him best: You are the only ruin of my reputation. But if I have dishonoured my family, for the love of you, methinks you should be the last man to upbraid me with it.

_Limb._ I am sure you are of the family of your abominable great grandam Eve; but produce the man, or, by my father's soul--

_Trick._ Still I am in the dark.

_Limb._ Yes, you have been in the dark; I know it: But I shall bring you to light immediately.

_Trick._ You are not jealous?

_Limb._ No; I am too certain to be jealous: But you have a man here, that shall be nameless; let me see him.

_Trick._ Oh, if that be your business, you had best search: And when you have wearied yourself, and spent your idle humour, you may find me above, in my chamber, and come to ask my pardon. [_Going._

_Limb._ You may go, madam; but I shall beseech your ladyship to leave the key of the still-house door behind you: I have a mind to some of the sweet-meats you have locked up there; you understand me. Now, for the old dog-trick! you have lost the key, I know already, but I am prepared for that; you shall know you have no fool to deal with.

_Trick._ No; here is the key: Take it, and satisfy your foolish curiosity.

_Limb._ [_Aside._] This confidence amazes me! If those two gipsies have abused me, and I should not find him there now, this would make an immortal quarrel.

_Trick._ [_Aside._] I have put him to a stand.

_Limb._ Hang it, it is no matter; I will be satisfied: If it comes to a rupture, I know the way to buy my peace. Pug, produce the key.

_Trick._ [_Takes him about the neck._] My dear, I have it for you: come, and kiss me. Why would you be so unkind to suspect my faith now! when I have forsaken all the world for you.--[_Kiss again._] But I am not in the mood of quarrelling to-night; I take this jealousy the best way, as the effect of your passion. Come up, and we will go to bed together, and be friends. [_Kiss again._

_Limb._ [_Aside._] Pug is in a pure humour to-night, and it would vex a man to lose it; but yet I must be satisfied:--and therefore, upon mature consideration, give me the key.

_Trick._ You are resolved, then?

_Limb._ Yes, I am resolved; for I have sworn to myself by Styx; and that is an irrevocable oath.

_Trick._ Now, see your folly: There's the key. [_Gives it him._

_Limb._ Why, that is a loving Pug; I will prove thee innocent immediately: And that will put an end to all controversies betwixt us.

_Trick._ Yes, it shall put an end to all our quarrels: Farewell for the last time, sir. Look well upon my face, that you may remember it; for, from this time forward, I have sworn it irrevocably too, that you shall never see it more.

_Limb._ Nay, but hold a little, Pug. What's the meaning of this new commotion?

_Trick._ No more; but satisfy your foolish fancy, for you are master: and, besides, I am willing to be justified.

_Limb._ Then you shall be justified. [_Puts the Key in the Door._

_Trick._ I know I shall: Farewell.

_Limb._ But, are you sure you shall?

_Trick._ No, no, he is there: You'll find him up in the chimney, or behind the door; or, it may be, crowded into some little galley-pot.

_Limb._ But you will not leave me, if I should look?

_Trick._ You are not worthy my answer: I am gone. [_Going out._

_Limb._ Hold, hold, divine Pug, and let me recollect a little.--This is no time for meditation neither: while I deliberate, she may be gone. She must be innocent, or she could never be so confident and careless.--Sweet Pug, forgive me. [_Kneels._

_Trick._ I am provoked too far.

_Limb._ It is the property of a goddess to forgive. Accept of this oblation; with this humble kiss, I here present it to thy fair hand: I conclude thee innocent without looking, and depend wholly upon thy mercy. [_Offers the Key._

_Trick._ No, keep it, keep it: the lodgings are your own.

_Limb._ If I should keep it, I were unworthy of forgiveness: I will no longer hold this fatal instrument of our separation.

_Trick._ [_Taking it._] Rise, sir: I will endeavour to overcome my nature, and forgive you; for I am so scrupulously nice in love, that it grates my very soul to be suspected: Yet, take my counsel, and satisfy yourself.

_Limb._ I would not be satisfied, to be possessor of Potosi, as my brother Brainsick says. Come to bed, dear Pug.--Now would not I change my condition, to be an eastern monarch! [_Exeunt._

_Enter_ WOODALL _and_ GERVASE.

_Gerv._ O lord, sir, are we alive!

_Wood._ Alive! why, we were never in any danger: Well, she is a rare manager of a fool!

_Gerv._ Are you disposed yet to receive good counsel? Has affliction wrought upon you?

_Wood._ Yes, I must ask thy advice in a most important business. I have promised a charity to Mrs Saintly, and she expects it with a beating heart a-bed: Now, I have at present no running cash to throw away; my ready money is all paid to Mrs Tricksy, and the bill is drawn upon me for to-night.

_Gerv._ Take advice of your pillow.

_Wood._ No, sirrah; since you have not the grace to offer yours, I will for once make use of my authority and command you to perform the foresaid drudgery in my place.

_Gerv._ Zookers, I cannot answer it to my conscience.

_Wood._ Nay, an your conscience can suffer you to swear, it shall suffer you to lie too: I mean in this sense. Come, no denial, you must do it; she is rich, and there is a provision for your life.

_Gerv._ I beseech you, sir, have pity on my soul.

_Wood._ Have you pity of your body: There is all the wages you must expect.

_Gerv._ Well, sir, you have persuaded me: I will arm my conscience with a resolution of making her an honourable amends by marriage; for to-morrow morning a parson shall authorise my labours, and turn fornication into duty. And, moreover, I will enjoin myself, by way of penance, not to touch her for seven nights after.

_Wood._ Thou wert predestinated for a husband, I see, by that natural instinct: As we walk, I will instruct thee how to behave thyself, with secrecy and silence.

_Gerv._ I have a key of the garden, to let us out the back-way into the street, and so privately to our lodging.

_Wood._ 'Tis well: I will plot the rest of my affairs a-bed; for it is resolved that Limberham shall not wear horns alone: and I am impatient till I add to my trophy the spoils of Brainsick. [_Exeunt._