Humor

The Tinted Venus: A Farcical Romance

Produced by David Clarke, Annie McGuire and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive/Canadian Libraries)

Chapters

1. Chapter 1

Produced by David Clarke, Annie McGuire and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images generously made available by The...

2. Chapter 2

"If I don't take care what I say, I _may_ be!" he thought, and answered guardedly, "On the contrary, I'm glad, for it gives me the opportunity of telling you something I--I thin...

3. Chapter 3

"Why, where's the harm, Mr. Tweddle, now it's all settled?" exclaimed Ada. "Bella, it was only this: he went and put a ring (now do wait till I've done, Mr. Tweddle!) on a certa...

4. Chapter 4

At last hunger drove him back to the passage in Southampton Row, the more quickly as it began to occur to him that the statue might possibly have revived, and be creating a dist...

5. Chapter 5

The foreigner had scarcely left when an old gentleman, a regular customer, looked in, on his way from the City, and at once noticed the innovation. He was an old gentleman who h...

6. Chapter 6

"If you've nothing more to say than that, we had better part," she remarked; and he caught at the suggestion with obvious relief. He had been in an agony of terror, lest, even i...

7. Chapter 7

"No," she said, vehemently; "I will seek no further. This is a city of darkness and mire. I am in a land, an age, which know me not: this much have I learnt already. The world w...

8. Chapter 8

"Count, I _can't_ answer for myself," said the man addressed as Braddle. "I shall send a bullet into him if you don't let me work it off with fists; I know I shall!"

9. Chapter 9

"I will leave you to meditate upon the charms so faintly shadowed in this image, remembering that whatever of loveliness you find herein will be multiplied ten thousand-fold in...

10. Chapter 10

Bella's expression changed to something blacker still. "No," she said, fixing her eyes on the still unconscious Leander; "I made sure that Mr. Tweddle was courting _a_ young lad...

11. Chapter 11

"Go away at once, hypocrite!" enjoined her mother, addressing the distracted hairdresser, as he stood, dumb and impotent, before her. "Do you want to kill my poor child? Take yo...

12. Chapter 12

Haggard and distraught was Leander as he went about his business that morning, so mechanically that one customer, who had requested to have his luxuriant locks "trimmed," found...

13. Chapter 13

A moment before, and, deserted as he believed himself to be by love and fortune alike, he had been almost resigned to the strange and shadowy future which lay before him; but no...

14. Chapter 14

Goddesses may be credited with some knowledge of the precious metals, and Aphrodite had no doubt of the result of the chemist's investigations. So it was with an air of serene a...