Part 3
Cook’s brother, a poor hard-working man, happened to have about forty pounds in his possession, a sum devoted to pay for some timber, to carry on his business as a bedstead-maker; and who, under the agonizing affliction of a brother in such a predicament, in order to facilitate his enlargement, deposited the amount of the debt, and ten pounds costs, in the Sheriff’s office, until the return of the writ, when it was intended to justify bail, and try the cause. I will now account for Cook’s being defeated in a remedy provided even by an Act of Parliament.
Being at liberty, and without a shilling to help himself, he had recourse to several wretches who, in the burning frenzy of their love fits, and to gratify the appetites of their languishing enamoratas, ordered suppers, and run into other expences for which they were not provided with the means of prompt payment, and which they never thought fit to discharge during his two year’s confinement: he, therefore, called upon some few of his _equivocal gender customers_, to remind them that the dues arising out of their gallantries had not been discharged. This led him, in company with his wife, to the house of a Mr. Stewart, to enquire after his friend and neighbour Mr. —, a ci-divant Reverend, who, it seems, had been _unfrocked_ during his probation in Newgate. Upon Cook’s name being announced, the old hen began clucking, and caused a momentary cessation of amorous billing with the salacious brood within. Cook, not being able to get any satisfaction, walked away; but was followed by a champion for the sacred rights of Sodom, who, at the distance of two streets, came up to them, seized the woman by the arm, and, after twisting her round, knocked her down!—My reader will be apt to think that this was beginning at the wrong end of a manly contest; but it must be remembered that the woman was the most offensive object of the two; for Cook, having breeches on, possessed the _possibility_ of a reconciliation; but with a petticoat, no terms of accommodation could take place: and in this case the antipathy was widened; for Mrs. Cook is really a good-looking, nay, a pretty woman. However J. Shenston, whether John or Jane I know not, received from Cook a knock-down blow in (his) turn; with the token of which clinging to his nose and month he ran back to Moggy Stewart’s; and, after a fainting fit or two had been recovered, Shenston assumed his male character, and posted away to Marlborough-street; where, upon the usual terms, he obtained a warrant against both Cook and his wife, for a pretended assault committed upon him.
Reader! as the business becomes a little more serious, I must crave a little unprejudiced attention. The warrant being executed in the evening, I undertook to produce the parties next morning, before the magistrates; they, of course, willingly appeared; when the hardy villain related the particulars of the assault committed upon him, as if he had never heard of the crime of perjury, or the punishment annexed to it: however the two defendants were of course ordered to find bail, which they did. And now begins a scene of oppression sufficient to make a man believe that the actors were impatient for their share of pillories and gibbets. When these two ill-fated people were before the magistrates, Mr. Baker asked Shenstone what he was?—he replied, a gentleman’s servant out of place. “How do you get your living?” was the next question. ‘I am supported by my friends at Birmingham:’ Cook, not chusing to let this _Birmingham-story_, pass, gave his _town-made_ description in the following workman-like manner; “_You are maintained by a set of Sodomites_! _these are your friends that support you_!”—Now, mark how this business was reported in the public papers:
“Cook, the cidevant keeper of the Swan, in Vere-street, was brought before the magistrates, for assaulting a respectable tradesman, with an intent to extort money from him.” The account then stated the names and places of residence of his bail; and that Cook had been taken to Queen-square, a few days before, for a similar attempt on a gentleman. With regard to what passed at Marlborough-street, I have faithfully stated it; and what passed at Queen-square was simply this, for I was present. Cook met a gentleman of some consequence over Westminster-bridge, and used some unpleasing language to him, which raised a mob: he thereupon threatened to take Cook before a magistrate, who replied that he would meet him at Queen-square; where they met, and, upon Cook’s promising not to molest him again, he was discharged. The reporter, not satisfied with the most shameful perversion of truth, added a malignant, diabolical note, that _extorting money is a capital offence_.
I must now bestow a few observations upon the transactions at Marlborough-street: and, first, with respect to the extortion and respectability of the prosecutor, who, by his own account, is a gentleman’s servant out of place—no very promising subject for extortion; a fellow whom Cook states to be one of the lowest attendants at Vere-street, for the most depraved purposes;—a fellow that was obliged to borrow a great coat to appear before the magistrates!!! EXTORTION! from a wretch living in a back garret, and literally in rags, and whose breeches, from the superfluous apertures, gave manifestation of rapturous attacks upon his virtue! and whose finances were so far from satisfying the demands of _extortion_, that the Constable was obliged to go to one of his Birmingham friends, for money to defray the trifling expences at the office.
I have only to observe, on the conduct of the reporter, that there can be no act of diabolism equal to the mischief originating in the ignorance, falshood, or that species of low bribed calumny, that is to be procured from the necessities of a fellow, who would libel the fairest character in the nation, for a beef-steak and pot of porter: and it is astonishing, that magistrates will suffer such vermin to infest the office:—at best, these hireling reporters are not to be depended upon; and the experience of half a century enables me to aver that I do not remember half a score correct reports, even of what passed in the courts at Westminster. Nor does the mischief close here: for the supplementary part of the atrocity is equally dreadful; which consists in the conductors of the Papers almost constantly refusing to correct their own errors, or censuring the conduct of such pernicious scribblers.
The consequence attending the statement of which I am complaining has been incalculable—for Cook’s poor brother, who is a man of unblemished character, is totally ruined—no one will employ him. Degraded in the estimation of his neighbours, his few creditors came upon him; his landlord gave him warning to quit his house. Such have been the effects of a poison, disseminated in a manner that has admitted of no antidote. A similar fate, also, attended the other bail:—Mrs. Cook turned out of her lodging at an hour’s notice, and her necessaries stopped until she had paid rent for a certain time she could not inhabit.
I think I shall be pardoned if I pause for a moment, and ask the candid and liberal reader whether the Reporter of such unprincipled and profligate falshoods is not entitled to some, and what reward? Slitting his nose! cutting off his ears—or, exalting him to a situation, where he may receive the kindred filth of his own pestiferous principles. I am a friend to the liberty of the press in its fullest extent; and have given many convincing proofs of it: but I am not so incorrigible an offender against the law of libels, as to deny my title to a gibbet, had I been the author of so vile, so miscreantic, and so reptilized a calumny!
The reader will recollect that Cook had deposited the money he was detained for, under what I call a stupid, useless Act of Parliament, calculated for no possible convenience for a defendant; who could, without the aid of this idiotic act, always deposit the debt and costs with a Sheriff’s-officer until he gave a bail-bond: but, under this Act, the debt is directed to be paid into Court, with ten pounds costs; and when the defendant has justified bail, he must be at the expence of a motion, to get the money restored: but here, this miserable defendant was denied the benefit of that Act, or, indeed, any existing law whatever. But it is some consolation to say, that he is the only man in the kingdom that is to be told, that neither law, justice, or humanity dare approach him:—for he has been denied the right of submitting his case to a Jury, whether he owed the money or not. The ten pounds costs having been deposited with the debt, the plaintiff’s attorney has laid his hands upon the whole, and the cause ended by a legalized robbery: for the infamous statement in the newspaper, before mentioned, has shut out the possibility of bailing the action and trying it.
Nor can the reptilized attorney, Wooley, who robbed them under pretext of defending them, as stated in the beginning of this treatise hope for a protraction of his iniquities longer than the ensuing term, when I shall apply to the Court of King’s Bench, to appoint Cook an Attorney; and I beg the candid reader will believe, when I assert that I have used great economy in the expenditure of the vast sum of Wooley’s iniquity, which the premier fiend of hell would tremble to count over: but perhaps the hour is at no great distance, when I shall be more profuse in the description of these person’s sufferings, and oppression; when I undertake the task of identifying the men with the crimes, and the crimes with the men.
In fine, the poor beggared brother has lost the money, without a possibility of a remedy: and, as a proof that Cook, wretched as his situation is at this day, was not, and is not, without the good opinion of many respectable men, an eminent tradesman, as any in the city of Westminster, offered to indemnify bail to any amount for him, or bail him, if he could do it without becoming subject to Newspaper calumny.
Immediately after bailing the assault, Cook was arrested the second time, and taken to a lock-up house (for the same malignant fate pursued him, to the exclusion of all possibility of bailing him) where he remained until a habeas could be sued out; upon which he was taken to the Fleet-prison, destitute of the means of procuring a supper or a bed, and subject to the ruffianly insults of the unfeeling and uniformed part of the prisoners.—About three days after he was committed to the Fleet, the Sessions, for Middlesex commenced, when he and his wife were both indicted for the pretended assault.
Cook being in the Fleet, I procured bail for the wife only; O say _procured_—for, during forty years’ practice I never before, in any one instance, hired bail: and, upon her being liberated, the magistrate, of course, granted a supersedeas to the warrant. Yet, astonishing as it may appear, at least to every professional man, this ill-fated woman was seized on the Saturday-night following, as she was going into the Fleet to her husband, by a ruffianly fellow named Creswell, a city constable; and a companion, disdaining to be behind-hand with his master in brutality; who took her to the Poultry Compter, where she was kept until Monday in the most shocking of all situations, among felons and prostitutes of the most abandoned description.
That those who were _paid_ for this outrage should not regard the supersedeas does not astonish me; but that the keeper of the compter should set a legal instrument at defiance, that strictly forbade him to molest or imprison the defendant, I do confess, staggers every conjecture I have been able to make upon the subject:—I hope his conduct proceeded from sheer ignorance, and I have some reason to think it did. However, determined not to desert these unhappy people in any extremity, I attended the Alderman at Guildhall, who very judiciously told this Mr. Constable Creswell he could not take notice of any thing but the supersedeas; and, of course, the woman was discharged. Notwithstanding this determination of the Alderman, this same Creswell took her into the County of Middlesex and delivered her to a constable belonging to Marlborough-street-office; and, after being wearied and tortured for two or three hours more, she was again discharged. It seems that at Marlborough-street (to use a trite phrase) the cat jumped out of the bag! for there arose a violent contention between Shenstone, the _nominal prosecutor_, and these _upright_, _assiduous_, _ministers of justice_, respecting, first, the amount of their wages, and, secondly, who was so pay them?—which, I am informed, ended in that species of mutual satisfaction that thieves generally experience, in _dividing the plunder of an empty purse_!
Another act of outrage was committed by this Creswell against Cook and his wife, about a fortnight previous to the execution of the warrant in question; when he apprehended, and took them to the Compter, _without any warrant at all_! where they were kept for the whole night. In the morning they went before Sir Matthew Bloxam, with all the marks and bruises they had received from Creswell over-night: but as the worthy Alderman will, in all probability, be called upon in a court of Justice, as a material witness, I shall add no more at present, than that he acted like himself upon the occasion; and, thinking that Cook had as much right _to his own watch_ as Creswell, with a severe reprimand compelled him to return it; {62} at the same time we shall see if Creswell’s indemnity for all these outrages will shelter him from the wholesome scourge of criminal justice.
I hope and trust that there is not a lover of genuine liberty, but will contribute a little to enable these oppressed people to obtain impartial justice; not only against Constable Creswell, but against _his employers_, whose abominations can have no reliance upon impunity, but from the _destruction of Cook_. And here I must repeat Lord Ellenborough’s assertion, that _although the parties may not be entitled to respect_, _yet the laws must be respected_! therefore, the same laws that punish crimes, must protect innocence; and I hope brutal constable Creswell, and _rapacious lawyer Woolley_, {63} will receive a lesson, that will inspire them with some small portion of reverence for his Lordship’s opinion.
The sufferings of Cook and his wife are marked with great aggravation: for they are sacrificed, not as an atonement for their own crimes, but that _the crimes of others shall not be atoned for_! and for myself, I should not be surprised at any act of desperation their wrongs may drive them to;—for, when injustice is thought no crime, revenge becomes a virtue.
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FINIS.
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ADDENDA.
I THINK it necessary to give some account of the debt of £60 for which Cook is now confined in the Fleet, at the suit of Mr. Henry Meux.
Cook had dealt with the house of Starkey and Jennings for many years; who, soon after his conviction, seized upon all his property, both at the Swan in Vere-street, and at the White Horse, Long Acre; the latter being kept by his wife separately, out of which she was forcibly turned; but, by what authority, remains involved in mystery to this day. His dealings with them appear to have been exemplary correct and just, and such as by no means could warrant the step they had taken;—there was no money due for any beer, for that in the cellar was over-paid:—the mortgage on the lease was reduced from £1175 to £116; and there was no debt of any kind at the time of the levy; for he did not owe ten shillings in the world.
Among the property seized under this levy in Vere-street, were six butts of porter, sent in by Mr. Henry Meux, the present plaintiff against Cook. Some days after the levy, Mrs. Cook learnt from the men in possession that all the effects were to be sold:—she thereupon sent to Meux, to take his beer back;—and to the Distiller, Mr. Temple: the latter of whom succeeded in getting away his property. But Meux’s claim was resisted; and in a manner that would have induced me (had Mr. Meux been my client) to have advised him to bring his action, against Starkey and not Cook; for it must be observed, this beer constituted the only debt due to Meux; whose cooper and servants will prove the struggle Cook made to have the beer returned: and I have no doubt but a jury will remunerate him sufficiently, not only to discharge Mr. Meux’s demand, but to recompense him for his imprisonment and other wrongs he has suffered from the transactions of Starkey’s house:—however, let my suspicions on the subject be what they may, this is not a time to promulgate them; as I shall reserve them for the contents of a council’s brief.—I have taken a vast deal of pains to sift the conduct of this _brewing_ community; and the end of my research is, that no fault attaches to the _Draymen_, or _horses_! Knavery, as well as Folly, _distinctly_ may accomplish much mischief; but a _combination_ of both, generally destroys the effect of each other;—which may, perhaps, be illustrated in the present case.
The levy was made on the 18th July, 1810, the property all taken, and Mrs. Cook turned into the street; and on the 26th of September following, being a space of two months that Cook had received no account of his property; but the evening of the day previous to his standing in the pillory, he was visited by Mr. Batt, the fac-totum of Starkey’s Brewhouse, and some other persons, to finally settle the accounts with the house. It must be confessed it was an hour illy calculated to settle accounts—more especially _such accounts_. Cook, in the moment of distraction, expecting to meet a violent death in a few hours, had neither time or spirits to expostulate; he made no objection to any settlement; a cabbage-leaf would have been as satisfactory to him _then_ as the following receipt.
£381 13_s._ 2_d._
26th Sept. 1810,
Received of Mr. Cook the sum of three hundred and eighty-one pounds 13s. 2d. being the balance of his account, and in full of all demands up to this day, due to Mrs. Starkey.
WILLIAM BATT.
However Mr. Batt thought the account very satisfactorily settled; and if Cook had been murdered the next day, it might have remained undisturbed; but, in my opinion, this receipt will prove the fruitful mother of a monstrous progeny! It was a cunning trick for a Brewer! It is a pity he was so scanty of a _few grains_ (I mean of common humanity and candor) _but he is a_ BREWER!—As to myself it is conduct inexplicable! but time may mature this mis-shapen fœtus of a _mash-tub_; and it may live to prove that the mutilated worm that is trod in the earth to day, may rise a scorpion to-morrow, and sting its oppressor to the heart.
After all, it is to be wished, for the sake of public, justice and common humanity, that Mr. Meux would, for the present, discharge a man from prison, of whose integrity and anxiety to do him justice he has had such convincing proofs; and I am not without a hope that he will do it, as I see by the writ his Attorney is one of those few men who disdain making a bill of costs out of the bowels of wretchedness. If Mr. Meux thinks the man possessed means of paying for a dinner when he was taken to a sponging house, he has been criminally imposed upon: for, from the moment he arrested him, to the present time, he has not had the means of procuring a two-penny loaf, but from the most mortifying mendicity. I do not wish to make any observations upon the unprovoked conduct of arresting him, for I firmly believe Mr. Meux is wholly ignorant of his wretched situation.
After Cook’s trial for the pretended assault, the public will be favored with the names and residences of the parties who are the principal objects of this publication; a great number of whom will be compelled to attend in Court, to give evidence on particular points connected with the trial.
I have only to add, in conclusion, that, as I begun with an apology for writing these pages at all, I now feel an equal inclination to apologize for having written them so ill, and so unworthy the pen of any man laying the least claim to literary abilities;—it has been an odious task; but my end is answered if it procures the injured man and his wife that justice I think them entitled to; and I hope the sale of it will afford them some relief.
HOLLOWAY.
6, _Richmond Buildings_, _Soho_.
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N.B. Cook intreats me to say, that during the twelve years he was in business he dealt with the following persons, exclusive of Starkey and Meux; whose justice he now challenges, to say if his conduct has not been uniformly marked with integrity.
Rickets and Hill Distillers Sharp and Lucas Ale Brewers Blackbird and Burleigh Porter ditto Stephens and Paget Distillers Felix Calvert Porter Brewer Brown and Parry Ditto Parry and Brown Distillers Temple Ditto Warren Brandy Merchant Wells Distillers.
Does this man deserve the treatment of a cheat, a swindler, or a thief?
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HOLLOWAY, PRINTER, ARTILLERY LANE, TOOLEY STREET.
FOOTNOTES.
{62} It is very remarkable that Creswell, the author of the outrage just stated, should be selected for the execution of the warrant for the assault; and it is equally unfortunate for the poor woman, that this _Parochial Pole-cat_ lives in the neighbourhood of the Fleet-prison, and is continually insulting her.
{63} The Fifth Number of Strictures on the Practice of Attorneys will soon be published; when the wide-spreading branches of this fellow’s iniquity will appear in full bloom;—the pestiferous fumes of which will give the law-sick fiends in Tartarus a vomit.