Chapter 4

A father had three sons, in whose company he was walking when an old enemy of his came running out of an ambush, and inflicted a severe wound upon him before any of the bystanders could interfere. The eldest son pursued the assassin, the second bound up his father's wound, and the third swooned away. Which of the sons loved his father best?

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MRS. BILLINGTON.

At a rehearsal of _As You Like It_, Mrs. Billington, who sustained the principal female character, called out in a very peremptory manner, "Fellow, bring me my crook." Mr. Simmonds, the property-man, immediately replied, "Madam, your fellow is not here." She felt the rebuke, and made the request more successfully in more proper language; thus by hook or by crook obtaining it.

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Cato the Censor only repented of three things during his life--to have gone by sea when he could go by land, to have passed a day inactive, and to have told a secret to his wife.

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"GONE TO JERICHO."

Tradition says that there is more than one place in the county of Essex to which Henry VIII. used occasionally to retire with his mistresses. One of these was Blackmore, at some distance from Shenfield. The manor-house of Blackmore is called _Jericho;_ so when Harry chose to retire with his mistresses, the cant phrase among the courtiers was, "_He was gone to Jericho_." Hence this proverb or saying.

HALBERT H.

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HUMBLE, OR UMBLE PIE.

The shanks and feet of a buck being called _umbles_, were formerly made into a pie for the retainers or feudal servants. Hence arose the old saying of "You shall eat humble pie."

HALBERT H.

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Says Tom, "Your lass look'd like a winter's day, When last I saw her with the Misses Flirty." "Indeed, you're merry, but tell me pray?" "Why, then," quoth Tom, "she was both short and dirty."

W. G--y.

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