Part 4

One of his flights of oratory, not in the best taste, is related on Hume's authority. "After a solemn pause, Mr. Whitfield thus addresses his audience:--'The attendant angel is just about to leave the threshold, and ascend to heaven; and shall he ascend and not bear with him the news of one sinner, among all the multitude, reclaimed from the error of his ways!' To give the greater effect to this exclamation, he stamped with his foot, lifted up his hands and eyes to heaven, and cried aloud, 'Stop, Gabriel! stop, Gabriel! stop, ere you enter the sacred portals, and yet carry with you the news of one sinner converted to God!'" Hume said this address was accompanied with such animated, yet natural action, that it surpassed any thing he ever saw or heard in any other preacher.--_Southey_.

* * * * *

SIR RICHARD JEBB.

Was very rough and harsh in manner. He said to a patient, to whom he had been very rude, "_Sir, it is my way_."--"Then," replied the patient, pointing to the door, "I beg you will make _that your way_." Sir Richard was not very nice in his mode of expression, and would frequently astonish a patient with a volley of oaths. Nothing used to make him swear more than the eternal question, "What may I eat? Pray, Sir Richard, may I eat a muffin?"--"Yes, Madam, the _best thing_ you can take."--"O dear! I am glad of that. But, Sir Richard, you told me the other day that it was the _worst_ thing I could eat!"--"What would be proper for me to eat to-day?" says another lady.--"Boiled turnips."--"Boiled turnips! you forget, Sir Richard, I told you I could not bear boiled turnips."--"Then, Madam, you must have a--vitiated appetite."

Sir Richard, being called to see a patient who fancied himself very ill, told him ingenuously what he thought, and declined prescribing, thinking it unnecessary. "Now you are here," said the patient, "I shall be obliged to you, Sir Richard, if you will tell me how I must live, what I may eat, and what not."--"My directions as to that point," replied Sir Richard, "will be few and simple. You must not eat the poker, shovel, or tongs, for they are hard of digestion; nor the bellows, because they are windy; but any thing else you please!"

He was first cousin to Dr. John Jebb, who had been a dissenting minister, well known for his political opinions and writings. His Majesty George III. used sometimes to talk to Sir Richard concerning his cousin; and once, more particularly, spoke of his restless, reforming spirit in the church, in the university, physic, &c. "And please your Majesty," replied Sir Richard, "if my cousin were in heaven he would be a reformer!"--_Wadd's Memoirs._

* * * * *

THE GATHERER.

"A snapper-up of unconsidered trifles." SHAKESPEARE.

* * * * *

GOOD BYE.

When from the friend we dearly love Fate tells us we must part, By speech we can but feebly prove The anguish of the heart.

And no soft words, howe'er sincere, Can half so much imply, As that suppress'd, though trembling tear, Which drowns the word--Good bye.

_Warwick._ W.S.

* * * * *

A keen shopkeeper, having in his service a couple of shopmen, who in point of intellect, were the very reverse of their master, a wag who frequented the shop, for some time puzzled the neighbourhood by designating it a "_music-shop_," although the proprietor dealt as much in _music_ as in _millstones_. However, being pressed for an explanation, he said that the _scale_ was conducted by a _sharp_, a _flat_ and a _natural_; and if these did not constitute "music," he did not know what did.

ISSACCAR.

* * * * *

IMMORTALITY.

Napoleon being in the gallery of the Louvre one day, attended by Baron Denon, turned round suddenly from a fine picture, which he had viewed for some time in silence, and said to him, "That is a noble picture, Denon."--"Immortal," was Denon's reply. "How long," inquired Napoleon, "will this picture last?" Denon answered, that, "with care and in a proper situation, it might last, perhaps, five hundred years."--"And how long," said Napoleon, "will a statue last?"--"Perhaps," replied Denon, "five thousand years."--"And this," returned Napoleon, sharply, "this you call immortality!"

* * * * *

LINES TO A LADY, ON HER REFUSING HER CARD.

Let heroes, anxious for their future fame, Obtain of Fortune what they want--a name; The _future_ theirs, the present hour be mine-- The only name I ask of fate--is thine; Yet happier still had fate decreed to me The favour'd lot, to give my name to thee.

T.B.

* * * * *

A dull barrister, once obtained the nickname _Necessity_--because _Necessity has no law_.

* * * * *

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