Chapter 20

ARG. How much this woman loves me; it is perfectly incredible.

MR. DIA. We shall now take our leave of you, Sir.

ARG. I beg of you, Sir, to tell me how I am.

MR. DIA. (_feeling_ ARGAN’S _pulse_). Now, Thomas, take the other arm of the gentleman, so that I may see whether you can form a right judgment on his pulse. _Quid dicis?_

T. DIA. _Dico_ that the pulse of this gentleman is the pulse of a man who is not well.

MR. DIA. Good.

T. DIA. That it is _duriusculus_, not to say _durus_.

MR. DIA. Very well.

T. DIA. Irregular.

MR. DIA. _Bene._

T. DIA. And even a little caprizant.

MR. DIA. _Optime._

T. DIA. Which speaks of an intemperance in the splenetic _parenchyma_; that is to say, the spleen.

MR. DIA. Quite right.

ARG. It cannot be, for Mr. Purgon says that it is my liver which is out of order.

MR. DIA. Certainly; he who says _parenchyma_ says both one and the other, because of the great sympathy which exists between them through the means of the _vas breve_, of the _pylorus_, and often of the _meatus choledici_. He no doubt orders you to eat plenty of roast-meat.

ARG. No; nothing but boiled meat.

MR. DIA. Yes, yes; roast or boiled, it is all the same; he orders very wisely, and you could not have fallen into better hands.

ARG. Sir, tell me how many grains of salt I ought to put to an egg?

MR. DIA. Six, eight, ten, by even numbers; just as in medicines by odd numbers.

ARG. Good-bye, Sir; I hope soon to have the pleasure of seeing you again.