The Happy Hypocrite: A Fairy Tale for Tired Men
Part 3
[Footnote 4: I would refer my little readers once more to the pages of _Contemporary Bucks_, where Captain Tarleton speculates upon the sudden disappearance of Lord George Hell and describes its effect on the town. "Not even the shrewdest," says he, "even gave a guess that would throw a ray of revealing light on the _disparition_ of this profligate man. It was supposed that he carried off with him a little dancer from Garble's, at which _haunt of pleasantry_ he was certainly on the night he vanished, and whither the young lady never returned again. Garble declared he had been compensated for her perfidy, but that he was sure she had not succumbed to his Lordship, having in fact rejected him soundly. Did his Lordship, say the cronies, take his life--and hers? _Il n'y a pas d'epreuve._ The _most astonishing_ matter is that the runaway should have written out a complete will, restoring all money he had won at cards, etc. etc. This certainly corroborates the opinion that he was seized with a sudden repentance and fled over the seas to a foreign monastery, where he died at last in _religious silence_. That's as it may, but many a spendthrift found his pocket clinking with guineas, a not unpleasant sound, I declare. The Regent himself was benefited by the odd will, and old Sir Follard Follard found himself once more in the ancestral home he had forfeited. As for Lord George's mansion in St. James's Square, that was sold with all its appurtenances, and the money fetched by the sale, no bagatelle, was given to various good objects, according to my Lord's stated wishes. Well, many of us blessed his name--we had cursed it often enough. Peace to his ashes, in whatever urn they may be resting, on the billows of whatever ocean they float!"]
Yes! Few and faint became the blemishes of his honeymoon. At first he had felt that his waxen mask, though it had been the means of his happiness, was rather a barrier 'twixt him and his bride. Though it was sweet to kiss her through it, to look at her through it with loving eyes, yet there were times when it incommoded him with its mockery. Could he put it from him! Yet that, of course, could not be. He must wear it all his life. And so, as days went by, he grew reconciled to his mask. No longer did he feel it jarring on his face. It seemed to become a very part of him, and, for all its rigid material, it did forsooth express the one emotion that filled him, true love. The face for whose sake Jenny gave him her heart could not but be dear to this George Heaven, also.
Every day chastened him with its joy. They lived a very simple life, he and Jenny. They rose betimes, like the birds, for whose goodness they both had so sincere a love. Bread and honey and little strawberries were their morning fare, and in the evening they had seed-cake and dewberry wine. Jenny herself made the wine, and her husband drank it, in strict moderation, never more than two glasses. He thought it tasted far better than the Regent's cherry brandy, or the Tokay at Brooks's. Of these treasured topes he had indeed, nearly forgotten the taste. The wine made from wild berries by his little bride was august enough for his palate. Sometimes, after they had dined thus, he would play the flute to her upon the moonlit lawn, or tell her of the great daisy-chain he was going to make for her on the morrow, or sit silently by her side, listening to the nightingale, till bedtime. So admirably simple were their days.
V
One morning, as he was helping Jenny to water the flowers, he said to her suddenly, "Sweetheart, we had forgotten!"
"What was there we should forget?" asked Jenny, looking up from her task.
"'Tis the mensiversary of our wedding," her husband answered gravely. "We must not let it pass without some celebration."
"No indeed," she said, "we must not. What shall we do?"
Between them they decided upon an unusual feast. They would go into the village and buy a bag of beautiful buns and eat them in the afternoon. So soon, then, as all the flowers were watered, they set forth to Herbert's shop, bought the buns and returned home in very high spirits, George bearing a paper bag that held no less than twelve of the wholesome delicacies. Under the plane-tree on the lawn Jenny sat her down, and George stretched himself at her feet. They were loth to enjoy their feast too soon. They dallied in childish anticipation. On the little rustic table Jenny built up the buns, one above another, till they looked like a tall pagoda. When, very gingerly, she had crowned the structure with the twelfth bun, her husband looking on with admiration, she clapped her hands and danced about it. She laughed so loudly (for, though she was only sixteen years old, she had a great sense of humour) that the table shook, and alas! the pagoda tottered and fell to the lawn. Swift as a kitten, Jenny chased the buns, as they rolled, hither and thither, over the grass, catching them deftly with her hand. Then she came back, flushed and merry under her tumbled hair, with her arm full of buns. She began to put them back in the paper bag.
"Dear husband," she said, looking down to him, "Why do not you too smile at my folly? Your grave face rebukes me. Smile, or I shall think I vex you. Please smile a little."
But the mask could not smile, of course. It was made for a mirror of true love, and it was grave and immobile. "I am very much amused, dear," he said, "at the fall of the buns, but my lips will not curve to a smile. Love of you has bound them in spell."
"But I can laugh, though I love you. I do not understand." And she wondered. He took her hand in his and stroked it gently, wishing it were possible to smile. Some day, perhaps, she would tire of this monotonous gravity, this rigid sweetness. It was not strange that she should long for a little facial expression. They sat silently.
"Jenny, what is it?" he whispered suddenly. For Jenny, with wide-open eyes, was gazing over his head, across the lawn. "Why do you look frightened?"
"There is a strange woman smiling at me across the palings," she said. "I do not know her."
Her husband's heart sank. Somehow, he dared not turn his head to the intruder.
"She is nodding to me," said Jenny. "I think she is foreign, for she has an evil face."
"Do not notice her," he whispered. "Does she look evil?"
"Very evil and very dark. She has a pink parasol. Her teeth are like ivory."
"Do not notice her. Think! It is the mensiversary of our wedding, dear!"
"I wish she would not smile at me. Her eyes are like bright blots of ink."
"Let us eat our beautiful buns!"
"Oh, she is coming in!" George heard the latch of the gate jar. "Forbid her to come in!" whispered Jenny, "I am afraid!" He heard the jar of heels on the gravel path. Yet he dared not turn. Only he clasped Jenny's hand more tightly, as he waited for the voice. It was La Gambogi's.
"Pray, pray, pardon me! I could not mistake the back of so old a friend."
With the courage of despair, George turned and faced the woman.
"Even," she smiled, "though his face has changed marvellously."
"Madam," he said, rising to his full height and stepping between her and his bride, "begone, I command you, from this garden. I do not see what good is to be served by the renewal of our acquaintance."
"Acquaintance!" murmured La Gambogi, with an arch of her beetle-brows. "Surely we were friends, rather, nor is my esteem for you so dead that I would crave estrangement."
"Madam," rejoined Lord George, with a tremor in his voice, "you see me happy, living very peacefully with my bride----"
"To whom, I beseech you, old friend, present me."
"I would not," he said hotly, "desecrate her sweet name by speaking it with so infamous a name as yours."
"Your choler hurts me, old friend," said La Gambogi, sinking composedly upon the garden-seat and smoothing the silk of her skirts.
"Jenny," said George, "then do you retire, pending this lady's departure, to the cottage." But Jenny clung to his arm. "I were less frightened at your side," she whispered. "Do not send me away!"
"Suffer her pretty presence," said La Gambogi. "Indeed I am come this long way from the heart of the town, that I may see her, no less than you, George. My wish is only to befriend her. Why should she not set you a mannerly example, giving me welcome? Come and sit by me, little bride, for I have things to tell you. Though you reject my friendship, give me, at least, the slight courtesy of audience. I will not detain you overlong, will be gone very soon. Are you expecting guests, George? _On dirait une masque champetre!_" She eyed the couple critically. "Your wife's mask," she said, "is even better than yours."
"What does she mean?" whispered Jenny. "Oh, send her away!"
"Serpent," was all George could say, "crawl from our Eden, ere you poison with your venom its fairest denizen."
La Gambogi rose. "Even _my_ pride," she cried passionately, "knows certain bounds. I have been forbearing, but even in _my_ zeal for friendship I will not be called 'serpent.' I will indeed be gone from this rude place. Yet, ere I go, there is a boon I will deign to beg. Show me, oh, show me but once again, the dear face I have so often caressed, the lips that were dear to me!"
George started back.
"What does she mean?" whispered Jenny.
"In memory of our old friendship," continued La Gambogi, "grant me this piteous favour. Show me your own face but for one instant, and I vow that I will never again remind you that I live. Intercede for me, little bride. Bid him unmask for me. You have more authority over him than I. Doff his mask with your own uxorious fingers."
"What does she mean?" was the refrain of poor Jenny.
"If," said George, gazing sternly at his traitress, "you do not go now, of your own will, I must drive you, man though I am, violently from the garden."
"Doff your mask and I am gone."
George made a step of menace towards her.
"False saint!" she shrieked, "then _I_ will unmask you."
Like a panther she sprang upon him and clawed at his waxen cheeks. Jenny fell back, mute with terror. Vainly did George try to free himself from his assailant, who writhed round and round him, clawing, clawing at what Jenny fancied to be his face. With a wild cry, Jenny fell upon the furious creature and tried, with all her childish strength, to release her dear one. The combatives swayed to and fro, a revulsive trinity. There was a loud pop, as though some great cork had been withdrawn, and La Gambogi recoiled. She had torn away the mask. It lay before her upon the lawn, upturned to the sky.
George stood motionless. La Gambogi stared up into his face, and her dark flush died swiftly away. For there, staring back at her, was the man she had unmasked, but lo! his face was even as his mask had been. Line for line, feature for feature, it was the same. 'Twas a saint's face.
"Madam," he said, in the calm voice of despair, "your cheek may well blanch, when you regard the ruin you have brought upon me. Nevertheless do I pardon you. The gods have avenged, through you, the imposture I wrought upon one who was dear to me. For that unpardonable sin I am punished. As for my poor bride, whose love I stole by the means of that waxen semblance, of her I cannot ask pardon. Ah, Jenny, Jenny, do not look at me. Turn your eyes from the foul reality that I dissembled." He shuddered and hid his face in his hands. "Do not look at me. I will go from the garden. Nor will I ever curse you with the odious spectacle of my face. Forget me, forget me."
But, as he turned to go, Jenny laid her hands upon his wrists and besought him that he would look at her. "For indeed," she said, "I am bewildered by your strange words. Why did you woo me under a mask? And why do you imagine I could love you less dearly, seeing your own face?"
He looked into her eyes. On their violet surface he saw the tiny reflection of his own face. He was filled with joy and wonder.
"Surely," said Jenny, "your face is even dearer to me, even fairer, than the semblance that hid it and deceived me. I am not angry. 'Twas well that you veiled from me the full glory of your face, for indeed I was not worthy to behold it too soon. But I am your wife now. Let me look always at your own face. Let the time of my probation be over. Kiss me with your own lips."
So he took her in his arms, as though she had been a little child, and kissed her with his own lips. She put her arms round his neck, and he was happier than he had ever been. They were alone in the garden now. Nor lay the mask any longer upon the lawn, for the sun had melted it.
_BY THE SAME AUTHOR_
A BEAUTIFUL EDITION OF
THE HAPPY HYPOCRITE
Illustrated in Colour by GEORGE SHERINGHAM
_Daily Graphic._--"A superb edition of a modern classic."
_Scotsman._--"Gracefully illustrated in colour, 'The Happy Hypocrite' makes an exquisite gift book.... For old or young the book is full of a fanciful beauty."
_Country Life._--"Mr Sheringham's delightful drawings printed in colour make this volume as fascinating a 'colour book' as has been seen for some time."
_Times._--"Illustrated by Mr George Sheringham, this edition is one which any parent who duly respects himself will steal from the schoolroom shelves and keep upon his own.... The variety of Mr Sheringham's illustrations is wide.... Delicious ornament, subtle appreciation of the author's spirit, gracious fantasy, a fruitful joy in the coxcombry and style of the period--these help to produce a work which gives in an unusual degree the impression that the artist liked doing it."
* * * * *
THE WORKS OF MAX BEERBOHM WITH A BIBLIOGRAPHY BY JOHN LANE
MORE
YET AGAIN
A CHRISTMAS GARLAND
ZULEIKA DOBSON
CARICATURES OF TWENTY-FIVE GENTLEMEN
THE POET'S CORNER
A BOOK OF CARICATURES
FIFTY CARICATURES
_Daily Telegraph._--"It is very seldom that a writer can treat with such wit and humour, blended with the most delicate fancy, such unpromising subjects as are included in this collection. In the ordinary events of the moment, in the most prosaic institutions, he finds something wonderful or something bizarre: from the dreariest of subjects he draws matter for quiet laughter."
_Pall Mall._--"A pretty wit.... Mr Beerbohm has clear vision, discrimination, and like the best of paradox makers, always a fund of good sense."
_Illustrated London News._--"He is altogether delightful in his whimsical moods.... 'More' is a book to buy and to turn to at odd moments."
_Scotsman._--"Readers who have grappled with 'The Works of Max Beerbohm' will stagger beneath the announcement that 'More' has come from the same hand.... It is not so much what he is talking about that matters in the case of this author, as what he says. He writes oddly, but is always amusing: a pleasant and readable exposition of the London way of looking at life."
_Referee._--"Not long ago 'The Works of Max Beerbohm' were published in one slim volume. Polite literature has now been enriched by the same author's 'More.' ... _Maximum Superbus_."
_Daily Telegraph._--"When some three years ago the public were informed that they could buy 'The Works of Max Beerbohm' for a small sum, those who had not followed contemporary letters very closely imagined that the long-forgotten volumes of some bygone author were offered for sale in the lump, and scented a bargain with which to fill the gaps in their bookshelves. In the small book which comprised 'the works' they got their bargain. They have now a chance of acquiring 'More.'"
_Academy._--"Mr Beerbohm can think and observe and write. He has the uncommon gift of seeing clearly the other side of things. He can stand aside impartially and watch contemporary life with the eye of the historian: his fastidiousness, when disciplined, is exquisite; his appreciation of the best is sound."
* * * * *
_BOOKS BY RICHARD KING_
OVER THE FIRESIDE (WITH SILENT FRIENDS)
With an Introduction by Sir ARTHUR PEARSON.
WITH SILENT FRIENDS
Essay in Everyday Philosophy. Seventeenth Edition.
SECOND BOOK OF SILENT FRIENDS
Third Edition.
PASSION AND POT-POURRI
Third Edition.
BELOW THE SURFACE
Footnotes to the Everyday.
SOME CONFESSIONS OF AN AVERAGE MAN
_The Times._--"Mr King is one of the Masters of the causerie, as those who have read his books well know."
_Evening Standard._--"You will enjoy many pleasant hours with one of our most intimate essayists."
_Daily Express._--"Mr King's easy, intimate, sympathetic style has made for him thousands of friends."
C. K. SHORTER in _The Sphere_.--"Richard King is a man of genius."