CHAPTER IX.

----Think ye see The very persons of our noble story As they were living; think ye see them great, And follow'd with the general throng.

PROLOGUE TO K. HENRY VIII.

The celebration of the birth-day of the Lady Adelaide passed over as we have described in the preceding chapter, and our lovely heroine was now quite recovered from whatever cause it might have been which had so disturbed and agitated her upon that eventful and recorded night. The Duke and Duchess, according to their previous determination, towards the close of November set off with their suite on their route for Dublin Castle; for the time was now fast approaching when in great pomp and state the Viceroy-Duke was to open the sessions of the Irish parliament.

Their Graces travelled by short stages on account of the abridgment of the days, and arrived in about four days in perfect health and safety at the vice-royal palace; no incident, occurrence, or even pleasantry, happening, that could possibly amuse the story-loving reader, or important enough to be handed down to posterity in savoury remembrance.

At this epoch of the Irish history the parliament met only once in two years; and a member of the lower house, the House of Commons, then held his seat for life, or at least certainly during the period of the life of the reigning sovereign, upon whose demise alone a new parliament was to be called. What then had a member thus chosen under these circumstances to apprehend or fear from the resentment of his constituents? Nothing!--certainly nothing! The member was virtually placed beyond their control, beyond their remonstrance, and above their resentment; while his hopes and expectations of reward from a minister for services done, or to be performed, were reasonably great, and held forth attractive bait to corruption. The representative would, or might, oppose the measures of a good minister, in order that his services might be brought into action, and duly paid for upon the performance thereof; and it would be equally his interest, upon the same corrupt _data_, to sell himself to a bad and profligate minister for prompt payment! But both these alternatives were fraught with evils to the constituents; and against these evils they had, they could have, no control! The minister too could indeed well afford to bid high and imposing terms, when the purchase was for life. Thus, although a small portion of virtue might resist a small portion of temptation, nevertheless that resistance would become weaker as time advanced, in an increased ratio; and, moreover, as a long duration and manifold opportunities were given for the temptation and the tempter, which could not, by possibility, be the case if parliaments, instead of being for the life of the sovereign,[24] and meeting only once in every two years, were to have met annually, and the conduct of the representative were placed under the eye and the control of their constituents. And assuredly it must strike the good sense of the reader that the prolongation of the term of parliament weakens the security of the people, for whose benefit parliaments were constituted; and that nothing can make it safe to repose so great a trust in any body of men, as the constitutive body delegates to its representative, but the shortness of the term for which such delegation is made.

[24] It was not, however, until the year 1768, during the administration of Lord Townsend, that the royal assent was given to an act for limiting the duration of parliament to eight years.

It appears, from consulting the page of history, that England was one of the first countries in which the representatives of boroughs were admitted into the great council of the nation; for until the year A. D. 1265, it was a privilege unknown and unclaimed.

The cause of calling the burgesses to the great council, or parliament of the nation, (according to Dr. Robertson, in his "View of the State of Europe,") was "in order to add greater popularity to the party of the barons that had armed against Henry the Third, and to strengthen the barrier against the encroachments of regal power."

But, alas! how fatally has the converse of the intention of our wise progenitors been established! From lapse of time, ministerial influence, the pecuniary embarrassments of the nobles and proprietors of boroughs, and the all powerful lever of corruption, the boroughs have changed masters. Those boroughs that were erected as mounds and ramparts against the powerful influence of the crown, have many of them been purchased by the crown, and now powerfully preponderating to the opposite scale, have increased, in a formidable degree, the royal influence and prerogative which they were created to check; and have but too effectually magnified the evils which they were formed to repress!

The day for the assembling of parliament had now arrived, and the Viceroy-Duke proceeded in great pomp and state to the House of Lords to open the session. The cap of maintenance was borne by Lord Mount-Leinster, and the sword of state by the Lord Glandarah. His Grace was seated in the superb antique state-coach, which was lined with crimson velvet, and trimmed with gold lace; the exterior was richly and magnificently adorned; the pannels had been painted by a celebrated Venetian artist, and the subjects were chosen from the heathen mythology. The state-carriage was drawn by eight beautiful black horses, with long flowing tails, and right nobly caparisoned; they were a present from His gracious Majesty James the Second. The harness and all the _accessoirès_ were in unison in their magnificence. Six state-carriages and four preceded that which bore the Duke of Tyrconnel; and the state-carriage was surrounded by the battle-axe guards. The streets were lined with soldiery, and no demonstration of respect was wanting as the noble Duke proceeded to the House of Peers. We need not tell that his Grace wore the robes of the order of the garter, nor dwell upon the brilliancy of the diamond star which glittered upon his breast, nor upon his fine appearance; for the Duke was justly accounted by far the handsomest man of the age in which he flourished. With great and unaffected dignity he entered the House of Peers, the trumpets, &c. all pealing forth the _now_ national anthem of "God save the King," which no former monarch or viceroy had ever received, as it was composed expressly for James II. Meanwhile the long and continued peal of cannon told to all that the noble viceroy was seated upon the throne.[25] We mean not to harass our kind reader to actual death by giving him, in _totidem verbis_, the speech of his Grace, but we will however venture to record, for historical remembrance, the mode _entrè_:--The Duke of Tyrconnel enters the House of Peers, the Earl of Mount-Leinster bearing the cap of maintenance; the Lord Glandarah carrying the sword of state; the train being supported by Sir Richard Talbot. His Grace made his _congès_ to the cloth of state; then taketh his seat on the throne under the canopy, the Secretary of State standing at his right hand. The Lord Chancellor then proceeds to his stall on the Lord Lieutenant's right hand, and acquaints the Lords that it is the Lord Lieutenant's pleasure that their Lordships should be covered. Next, the Lord Chancellor, kneeling, receiveth a direction from the Lord Lieutenant; and thereupon standing up again wills the Gentleman-Usher of the black-rod to acquaint the House of Commons that it is the Lord Lieutenant's pleasure that they should attend his Grace. When the speech contained the following items:--'Thanks to the House of Peers for their loyal devotion so often manifested for the honour of the crown, and so forth; their unshaken loyalty, &c. to the king's person and government. Thanks followed to the House of Commons for the necessary provisions for the services of the ensuing year so cheerfully made, &c. Then followed a general appeal to both houses, entreating them that when they returned to their respective counties to use their utmost endeavours to inculcate and bring to bear the same loyalty and affection by them so often and efficiently demonstrated.' The Duke concluded his speech in these emphatic terms:--"And I cannot conclude, my lords and gentlemen, without the hope that you will permit no apprehensions of grievances or causeless jealousies to interrupt that tranquillity and social order, and obedience to the laws, which constitute the fountain of all political happiness--the source and the support of industry, agriculture, commerce, and all national amelioration, which has been ever the unvaried pursuit of the best of kings. And I shall not fail to represent to my royal master your dutiful devotion; and the only reward which I look to, is your free and unbiassed approbation!"

[25] At this point of time the Irish House of Lords met at the hour of three o'clock in the afternoon; but when the house was engaged in the hearing of appeals they regularly assembled at the hour of nine o'clock in the morning.

His Grace upon quitting the throne was dutifully received by the house uncovering, and rising from their seats. An address was then moved as an echo of the speech, by the Earl of Clanrickarde, and was seconded by the Viscount Kilmallock; which passed the noble house, _nemine contradicente_. In the lower house the address was moved by Mr. Murtagh Magennis of Balligorionbeg, and seconded by Mr. James Lally of Tallendaly, and passed the house unanimously.

Leave was granted for an act to be brought into the house, entitled, "The Tithe Agistment Bill," which was read next day the first time, and after a few days a second time; and a day was appointed for the third reading. When that day had arrived Lord Glandarah, who was in the robing-room, observed a strong muster of bishops; and upon entering the house he whispered a friend--"I clearly perceive, Gad save my soul! that we shall have a very angry political debate to-day, for I left my lords the bishops duly caparisoning them-selves in their celestial armour!"

Some altercation took place in the robing-chamber between Lord Mount-Leinster and Bishop Rocket, between whom there existed a private pique.

"I see, my Lord Bishop, that charity covers a multitude of----Hem! I mean, my Lord, that I verily saw your Lordship giving alms to the amount of----one shilling just now as I arrived in the house!"

"Yes, my Lord Mount-Leinster, I deny it not: and I perceived that your Lordship followed on the instant so excellent an example; for, from the cogency of the case, you too were forced to pay twice the sum! Ha, ha, ha!--_two_ shillings into the poor's box."

All which being _translated_, (no offence to Bishop Rocket,) signifies that the Bishop and the Earl were both late in their arrival in the House of Peers, and they had accordingly to pay the penalty for arriving in the house "beyond a quarter of an hour after prayers had been read"--_secundum regulam_.[26]

[26] "Every Lord that comes not within a quarter of an hour after prayers, if he be a Bishop or Baron, he, is to pay one shilling, and if he be any degree above, two shillings to the poor man's box."--_Standing Orders of the Irish House of Lords_, p. 13. Printed by Sleater, Dublin, 1778. The title of the work was, "Rules and Orders to be observed in the Upper House of Parliament of Ireland."--The Clerk of the House was treasurer of the poor's box.--p. 39.

The clerk read aloud at the table, "_Hodie, tertia vice lecta est billa._" This act was "the Tithe Agistment Bill," entitled, "An act to quiet and bar all claims of tithe agistment for dry and barren cattle."

When an angry debate ensued, Bishop Rocket arose with much warmth, and contended "that it was an act tending most forcibly to wrest the rights and privileges of the Church, to the great detriment of the hierarchy, and the all unalienable properties and immunities of their lawful successors; and forcibly militating against the welfare, property, and prosperity, of the Church and State, as then by the laws of the land established and in force."

Lord Mount-Leinster arose: "My Lords, this is a bill which I would call as one of the most pacificatory nature, and tending to repress the grievous mode in which tithes are generally collected from the population of this country, who have, if they are of the Catholic persuasion, to pay two pastors; and I will moreover, my Lords, be bold to say, that no school-boy, studying his _as in presenti_, could be so stupidly credulous as to give credence to the monstrous assertion of the Right Reverend Lord, or for a moment believe that posthumous piety to his successors can or could be the predominating cause of the vote given this night by the Right Reverend Prelate."--[_Hear, hear, hear._]

With the most violent indignation Bishop Rocket arose: "Lord Mount-Leinster, but for these black rags," shaking indignantly his sacerdotal robes; "look ye, but for these black rags, I would fight you!"--[Here numerous cries were heard of "_Order, order, order_"--"_Chair, chair, chair!_"]

Sir Patricius Placebo and Mr. Berenger were stationed at the bar of the house, and the risible muscles of the Baronet were incontinently put into play, which had been _certes_ audible, but for the noise and uproar in the house. Laughingly, he whispered Mr. Berenger, "Room, room, my Lords and Nobles all; I cry make room for the incensed worthies!

DOSS MOI, TANE STIGMEN!"

He then laughed immoderately, and took snuff at a surprising rate from his King Carolus' snuff-box. "Yes, yes, Mr. Berenger," he added, "ha, ha,

'Fools will talk, and fools will prate, Nor silence keep at any gait.'

For, Sir, you know,

'Πάντες οἱ μωροὶ μαίνονται.'[27]

[27] "All fools are mad."

That is at least according to the doctrine of the stoics."

The gallant, gay Mr. Berenger so politely smiled ever and anon, that it nearly amounted to a laugh. But this had been interdicted at the court where he too often had

----"listened, When the last Charles's beauties glistened In splendid robes of gaudy vice, And could with syren songs entice."

However the question, upon being put, was resolved in the negative, by the motion that the bill should be read that day six months! The Chancellor could make no peace between the enraged combatants, who adjourned to the robing-room, when this scene of altercation took place:--

Lord Mount-Leinster, addressing Bishop Rocket, emphatically said: "My Lord Bishop, you are now unharnessing yourself from that celestial panoply or armour in which you flourished in the House of Peers, and which, I must observe, you somewhat unseemingly, if not indecorously, called your "black rags,"

"Tutius est igitur fictis contendere verbis, Quam pugnare manu."

I have ever been, my Lord--mark me--a gallant swordsman; nor would I brook an affront from a king. Let not then your sacerdotal robes, or, as you were pleased in mirth to call them, your "black rags," let them not, I say, prove your peace-makers in this gross breach of decorum. I must observe, that, according to the spirit and strict laws of the _Duello_, or single combat, the ceremonies thereunto affixed and appertaining, connected and deducible from chivalry, are duly and implicitly laid down by the celebrated Caranza,[28] the oracle of duelling, and the no less sage and famous Master Selden, in his very learned and unimpeachable treatise upon the laws of the _Duello_; and in good sooth my very grave and reverend Lord Coke has it as a _punctum_ in his Institutes, 'that in these matters, where the person possessing a right, or sustaining a grievance, could not act, on account of professional or personal disability, or perform the service required in person, he was then to name a sufficient person for his deputy!' Now, my Lord Bishop, I must needs observe, that I think that this was truly a marvellous right praiseworthy custom, that when any grave and reverend personage, willing to give satisfaction, as you profess, finds himself impeded by his reverend skirts tripping up the laws of the _Duello_, from being, for sad ensample, a son or dignitary of the Church, and so forth, that upon such occasions their _next_ and _nearest of kin_ should take up the gauntlet: and such a proxy, my Lord Bishop, I now claim from you to enter the lists with me, as becomes your true knight and representative!"

[28] The celebrated Caranza was, in sooth, the oracle and manual of duelling in his day. He was by birth a Spaniard; his name Geronimo Caranza. His famous work was entitled, "_Verdera Destreza de las Armas_"--"The true Dexterity or Skill in Arms." His talents are thus eulogized in the comedy of "_Los Locos de Valencia_," of Lope de Vega:--

----"El gran Caranza, A quien las armas en Espana deben Quanta mayor destreza el arte alcanza."

BISHOP ROCKET.--"Know then, Lord Mount-Leinster, that I shall send my sedan chairmen to fight you!!"

"A precious boon, and peerless proxies, I needs must say, my Lord Bishop, thou hast chosen!!! In sooth I oft have heard of knights of the lance and eke of the bucket,[29] but never until now heard of knights of the pole! But although, from your Lordship's reply, it appears that your _next_ and _nearest_ of kin happen to be your sedan-chairmen!! my own dignity prevents me having any further parley with you, much less contact with _your kindred_!" And then Lord Mount-Leinster, wheeling around, made his exit from the robing-room, flinging a rapid and most contemptuous look at the discomfitted bishop.

[29] This slily alludes to the _Secchia Rapita_, ("The Rape of the Bucket,") a burlesque poem, by Tassoni.

All peers and prelates, much diverted at the result, now withdrew. _Solventur risu curiæ._ The enemies of Bishop Rocket (who had certainly sprung from a low origin) insisted that his two sedan chairmen were his own proper kinsmen, and, moreover, bore his name. His friends did not deny the charge; but said, in extenuation, that "after all this was no wondrous thing, as the Maréschal de Richelieu, when at Vienna, had purchased baronies for his two _portéurs de chaise_; and when some ladies of fashion boasted that they had in their kitchen several French Marquises, 'I believe it,' replied the Maréschal, 'for my sedan chair is supported by a brace of German barons!'"

The eulogists of Lord Mount-Leinster loudly lauded him for the chivalrous spirit which he had manifested in this _rencontre_ with the Church, which they considered and maintained as in no wise inferior to the adventure of the redoubted knight _de la Mancha_, when he encountered the windmill, and whose valour it was confessed was only to be paralleled with his discretion!