Chapter 23

Is I goin' to let myself be put up to things like that?...

MRS. FIELITZ

A whole lot o' thinkin' over you'd ha' done! You ain't done any thinkin' all the days o' your life. A great donkey like you ... an' thinkin'. Well! A fine mess would come of it if you took to thinkin'.

FIELITZ

Mother, I axes you to consider that ...

MRS. FIELITZ

Put you up? To what? What is I puttin' you up to?--This here old shed is goin' to burn down sometime. It's goin' to burn down one time or 'nother, if it don't first come topplin' down over our heads. It's squeezed in here between the other houses in a way to make a person feel ashamed, if he looks at it.

FIELITZ

Mother, I axes you to consider ...

MRS. FIELITZ

Aw, I wish you'd clear out o' the front door this minute! I'm goin' to pack up my things pretty soon too. An' you c'n go over to the justice for all I care. I been puttin' you up to things, you know!

FIELITZ

Mother, I axes you to consider that ... Look out that you don't go an' get a black eye! 'Cause I, if I ...

MRS. FIELITZ

[_With a gesture as though about to push him out._] Get out! Just get out! It'll be good riddance! The sooner the better! What are you dawdlin' for?

FIELITZ

[_Beside himself._] Mother, I'll hit you one across the ... You're goin' to put me out, eh? What? Outta my shop? Is this here your shop? I'll learn you! Just wait!

MRS. FIELITZ

Well, I'm waitin'. Why don't you start? You're that kind of a man, are you? Come right on! Come on now! You got the courage! I'll hold my breath or maybe I'd blow you right into Berlin.

FIELITZ

[_Hurls a boot against the wall in his impotent rage._] I'll break every stick in this here shop! To hell with the whole business: that's what I says! I must ha' been just ravin' mad! There I goes an' burdens myself with a devil of a woman like that, an' I might ha' lived as comfortable as can be! She killed off one husband an' now I'm dam' idjit enough, to take his place! But you're goin' to find out! It ain't goin' to be so easy this time! I'll first kick you out before I'll let you get the best o' me! Not me! No, sir! You c'n believe that!

MRS. FIELITZ

You needn't exert yourself that much, Fielitz ...

FIELITZ

Not me! Not me! You c'n depend on that! You ain't agoin' to down me! You c'n take my word for it.

[_He sits down, exhausted._

MRS. FIELITZ

Maybe you might like throwin' some more boots. There's plenty of 'em around here--I s'ppose you married me for love, eh?

FIELITZ

God knows why I did!

MRS. FIELITZ

If you'll go an' study it out, maybe you'll know why. Maybe it was out o' pity? Eh? Maybe not.--Or maybe it was the money I had loaned out?--Well, you see! I s'ppose that was it.--You c'n live a hundred years for my part! But it's always the same thing. 'Twasn't much different with Julius neither. If things had gone his way, I wouldn't have nothin' saved this day neither. The trouble is a person is too good to you fellers.

FIELITZ

An' outta goodness you want me to go an' take a match an' set fire to the roof over my head?

MRS. FIELITZ

You knew that you'd have to go an' build. I said that to myself right off, an' buildin' costs money. There ain't no gettin' away from that fact. An' the few pennies we has ain't more'n a beginnin'. If we had what you might call a real house here ... Schmarowski, he'd build us one that'd make all the others look like nothin' ... you could have a fine shop here. We might put a few hundred dollars into it an' sell factory shoes. If you'd want to take in repairing you could get a journeyman an' put him here. An' if you wanted to go an' make some new shoes yourself, you could take the time for all I care.

FIELITZ

I don't know! I s'ppose I ain't got sense enough for them things. I thought I'd get hold o' a bit o' money ... I thought I'd be able to lay out a bit o' money! Buildin' a little annex of a shop--that's good fun. I thought it all out to myself like--with nice shelves and things like that ... an' I planned to hang up a big clock an' such. An' now you sit on your money bag like an old watch dog.

MRS. FIELITZ

That money--it ain't to be thrown away so easy. 'Twas earned too bitter hard for that.

FIELITZ

... You forgets that I've been in trouble before. Is I to go an' get locked up again?

MRS. FIELITZ

Never mind, Fielitz, to-morrow is another day. A person mustn't go an' take things that serious! I was more'n half jokin' anyhow.--Go over to Grabow's an' drink a glass o' beer!... We must all be satisfied's best we can. An' even if you can't go an' open a shoe shop, an' even if you gotta worry along cobblin' an' can't buy no clock--well, a good conscience is worth somethin' too.

THE CURTAIN FALLS

THE SECOND ACT

_The smithy of LANGHEINRICH. The little house protrudes at an angle into the village street. The shed that projects over the smithy is supported by wooden posts. The empty space below the shed is used for the storage of tools and materials. Wheels are leaned against the wood, a plough, wheel-tyres, pieces of pig iron, etc. An anvil stands in the open, too, and several working stools. From behind the house, jutting out diagonally, a wooden wagon is visible. The left front wheel has been taken off and a windlass supports the axle._

_Through the door that leads to the shop one sees smithy fires and bellows._

_Opposite the smithy, on the left side of the village street which, taking a turn, is lost to view in the background, there is a board fence. A small locked gate opens upon the street._

_A cloudy, windy day._

_DR. BOXER, in a slouch hat and light overcoat, stands holding a heavy smith's hammer at arm's length. EDE has a horseshoe in his right hand, a smaller hammer in his left, and is looking on._

EDE

[_Counts._] ... twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four an' one makes twenty-five an' another makes twenty-six.--Great guns, you're ahead o' me now. An' twenty-seven, an' twenty-eight, an' twenty-nine an' thirty. My respects, Doctor. That's all right. Is that the effect o' the sea air?

DR. BOXER

It may be. You see I haven't quite forgotten the trick.

EDE

No, you haven't. That's pretty good. Now let's try it with weights, though. I c'n hold up a hundred an' fifty pounds, Doctor. How about yourself?

DR. BOXER

I don't know. It remains to be seen.

EDE

What? You think you c'n lift a hundred weight an' a half? You're a little bit of a giant, ain't you? You didn't learn that on board ship. I thought you travelled as a sawbones an' not as a strong man!--Look at that little man over there goin' into Mrs. Fielitz' house. That's her son-in-law.

DR. BOXER

He looks very much like a bishop.

EDE

Right enough! That's what he is--Bishop Schmarowski.--You c'n knock! The old woman's out and she took her cobbler with her. There won't be nothin' to get there to-day.--You see, Doctor, when that fellow goes there he wants money. If he weren't hard up he wouldn't come.

DR. BOXER

The Fielitzes went in to Berlin to-day; I met them this morning at the railway station. Tell me: _he_ isn't quite right in his mind, is he?

EDE

How so? That wasn't never noticed. He's a pretty keen fellow ... No, I couldn't say that _he's_ crazy.

DR. BOXER

He talked a mixture of idiotic nonsense and looked away from me while he was talking. The fellow looked like an evil conscience personified. But I don't suppose he has a conscience.

EDE

By the way: that time they came down on you an' made a search in your house--that fellow Fielitz had his hand in it. He helped get you into that pickle.

[_MRS. SCHULZE puts her head out at the attic window._

MRS. SCHULZE

Ede!

EDE

What?

MRS. SCHULZE

Ain't Mr. Langheinrich back yet?

EDE

Well, o' course he is, naturally. [_MRS. SCHULZE disappears and EDE withdraws under the shed._] Quick! Take this hammer, will you, Doctor, an' hammer away a bit. If you kept up your strength the way you have, you ain't forgot about that neither.

DR. BOXER

I went at locksmith's work like the deuce when there was nothing to do on board ship. That gave me a very good chance.

EDE

You're a doctor an' you're a smith an' ... I guess you're a sausage maker too!

DR. BOXER

I even made sausages once.

EDE

Nobody didn't want to eat them, I guess.

DR. BOXER

I wouldn't have advised any one to do so either. The sausages were mainly filled with arsenic. The rats scarcely left us space to turn around in.

EDE

[_About to set to work._] Ugh! That wouldn't be no kind o' sausage for me. Come now, Doctor, go at it! We wants the missis to think that two people is workin' here or she'll never stop axin' questions.

DR. BOXER

Where did Langheinrich go so early?

EDE

That's a secret all right--the kind o' secret that all the sparrows on the gutters is chirpin'.--Doctor, roll that wheel over here, will you? You got a chance now to deserve well, as they says, o' the Prussian state, 'cause this here waggon belongs to the government forester.--That sort o' thing can't do you no harm.

DR. BOXER

No. And anyhow I ought to stand in with people.

[_He rolls the wheel slowly along; it escapes him and glides backwards._

EDE

That ain't so easy. Them people has long memories. [_He catches the wheel._] Hold on there! No goin' backward! I'm for progress, I am, Doctor! I'm willin' to fight for that!

DR. BOXER

But you must be careful of your fingers. [_He puts on a leathern apron._] Is Langheinrich going to be gone long?

EDE

[_Whistles._] That depends on how hard it is!

DR. BOXER

Why do you whistle so significantly?

EDE

That's a gift o' my family. All my eleven brothers an' sisters is musicians. I'm the only one that's a smith. [_For a space both work at the wheel in silence. Then EDE continues._] 'Twouldn't be a bad stage play, I tell you. You wouldn't have to be scared o' riskin' somethin' on that. You'd make money! That's somethin' fine--specially for young people! You been away here a good long while, that's the reason you don't know what's what. I could tell you a few little things that happen around here in bright daylight.--D'you know that Leontine?

DR. BOXER

Very sorry indeed, but I don't.

EDE

No? An' then you pretend that this is your home an' don't know that girl. Somethin' wrong with you!

DR. BOXER

Oh, yes, yes, Leontine! Mrs. Wolff's daughter! I once got the deuce of a flogging on her account.

EDE

Well, I wish you'd ha' been here two hours ago. Well, first of all that same girl slouched by here ... No! First of all her mother an' father went away ...'twasn't more'n dawn yet! Then Leontine at about eight. She looked all around an' waited an' made lovin' eyes in this direction an' then walked by. You should ha' seen Langheinrich. "Sweetheart, where are you goin'?"--Then, after a while comes Constable Schulze and goes after her.--That was too much for Langheinrich. Off with his apron an' there he goes, quick 's a stag. That's the way it was. You could ha' observed that: the rest ain't to be observed.--There's Langheinrich hurryin' back now. [_He at once sets zealously to work and pretends to discover LANGHEINRICH, who is approaching hastily and vigorously at this moment._] Well, at last! Good thing you're here! No end o' askin' after you. Did you catch her?

LANGHEINRICH

[_Brusquely._] Catch what?

EDE

I meant the 'bus.

LANGHEINRICH

Hold your...! I had business to attend to.--Well now, I'll give a dollar if this here ain't Dr. Boxer! Why, how are you? How are things goin'? An' what are you doin' nowadays? Did your ship come in? You been away now--lemme see--that must be three years, eh? Sure. That's ... well, time passes.

DR. BOXER

I want to settle down here, Langheinrich. That is to say, I have that intention if it's possible. I should like to try my luck at home for a change.

LANGHEINRICH

Things is best at home, that's right. O' course, there's one here now, a doctor I mean, but he ain't good for much. They say somethin' queer happened to him onct--got his ears boxed too hard or somethin'. An' they say that made him kind o' melancholious. That ain't much good for his patients! No sick man can't get well through that. I'll send for you, Doctor, if I need help.

DR. BOXER

I'll extract my first dozen wisdom teeth free of charge. So you'll be glad if you don't need me soon.

LANGHEINRICH

Well, I ... fact is ... my wife is sick.

_MRS. SCHULZE comes hurriedly from the house._

MRS. SCHULZE

It's a mighty good thing that you're here. D'you hear? That whimperin' goes right on.

LANGHEINRICH

Doctor, I'm goin' to ax you somethin' now: d'you know any cure for jealousy? You see, it's this way: We had a baby, an' I'd be lyin' if I said I wasn't mighty well pleased. An' why shouldn't I be? But now my wife is sick. She can't get up an' she don't want me to budge from the side o' her bed. She screams an' she scolds an' she reproaches me. Sometimes I reely don't know what to do no more.

MRS. SCHULZE

You better go upstairs a bit first.

EDE

Do give him a chance to get his breath!

LANGHEINRICH

Oh, pshaw! Never you mind! I c'n attend to that right off.

[_After he has taken off his hat and coat and slipped on wooden shoes he hurries into the house._

EDE

Well, what d'you think o' that?

DR. BOXER

He's a cheerful soul--more so, if possible, than he used to be. It does one good to find a man that way.

EDE

Only that I axed after Leontine, that riled him more'n a little bit all right.

MRS. SCHULZE

[_To EDE, watchfully:_] Where was the boss so early this mornin'?

EDE

In Lichtenberg, attendin' a dance.

MRS. SCHULZE

The treatment that woman's gettin' is all wrong, Doctor. I don't mix in what don't concern me. But the way she's treated, that ain't no kind o' treatment, I c'n tell you. I told that Majunke man too that the missis was goin' to the dogs this way.

DR. BOXER

But Dr. Majunke is very capable. I know him to be an excellent physician.

MRS. SCHULZE

[_Interrupting._] Sure, sure, an' that's true. 'Course he's capable. That's right, an' so he is. But, you see, he just won't prescribe nothin' ...

DR. BOXER

What should he prescribe? Let the people save their money.

MRS. SCHULZE

But that's just what people don't want to do. It's like this: medicine's got to be. If there ain't none they says: how c'n the doctor help us?

DR. BOXER

Mrs. Langheinrich never was strong. Even years ago when she used to sew for us ...

MRS. SCHULZE

That's the way it is. She's a little bit humpbacked; that's right. That's the way women is, though, Doctor! A seamstress--that's what she was...! She sewed an' she sewed and saved up a little money...! An' what kind of a bargain is it she's got now. A handsome feller an' sickness an' worry an' no rest no more by day or night.

_LANGHEINRICH returns from the house._

LANGHEINRICH

[_Tapping MRS. SCHULZE'S shoulder somewhat roughly._] Hurry now! Go on up! It's all arranged an' settled. To-morrow I'm goin' to take her to the clinic.

MRS. SCHULZE

That ain't goin' to be no easy work!

LANGHEINRICH

[_Lifts a great can of water to his mouth._] I can't help that. Things is as they is. [_He takes an enormously long draught from the tin can. Putting it down:_] Ede, drive them ducks away!

EDE

[_Acting as though he were driving away ducks, flaps his leathern apron and rattles his wooden shoes._] Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Chuck! Chuck! Chuck!

_MRS. SCHULZE retires into the house, shaking her head._

LANGHEINRICH

Them ducks is your regular fire eaters. There don't need nothin' but for some sparks to fly off an', right straight off, they gobbles 'em down. Then we gets what you might call roast duck that never meant to be roasted. An' my old woman she ain't no friend o' that.

_RAUCHHAUPT looks over the fence to the left._

LANGHEINRICH

There's been a big fire again over there behind Landsberg. All the houses on a great estate is ashes.

RAUCHHAUPT

Did you maybe see Gustav anywhere?

LANGHEINRICH

Mornin', old boy! No, not me! Has he gone an' run off again?

RAUCHHAUPT

I ordered him to go over to the Fielitzes.

LANGHEINRICH

The Fielitzes have all gone in to town.

RAUCHHAUPT

I don't know, but there's a kind o' burned smell in the air ... Ouch! [_He distorts his face in pain and grasps his leg._] Ain't Leontine here?

LANGHEINRICH

Naw, she had to go to court to-day. Always the same trouble with the alimony. That confounded feller, he don't pay.

RAUCHHAUPT

[_Calls out._] Gustav! [_He listens and then turns leisurely back to the little gate. The wind worries and drives him._] Gustav!

LANGHEINRICH

Stiff wind coming up, all right! [_RAUCHHAUPT disappears._] Ede!

EDE

All right.

LANGHEINRICH

Let's get to work now! [_He spits into his hands and sets to work vigorously._] Well, Doctor, where've you been runnin' about? Did you get as far as the Chinese? You gotta tell us all about that some day when we got plenty o' time for it.

DR. BOXER

Surely, I've been all over.

LANGHEINRICH

Did you see the sea-serpent too?

Da. BOXER

Surely, Langheinrich, far down in the South Seas.

LANGHEINRICH

An' it's true that it feeds on dill pickles?

DR. BOXER

Several hundred dozen a day.

LANGHEINRICH

[_Laughing._] That's all right then. An' when, you see that serpent again, just give her my best regards.

DR. BOXER

I doubt whether I'll ever get so far again in life.

LANGHEINRICH

I guess you got all you wanted o' that? Now you see. Doctor, you just got to the point where I am exactly an' I didn't have to move from this spot.--Well, I guess your old mother, she'll be glad. She's gettin' along all right. Doin' reel well. I always looked in a bit now an' then, helpin' to see that things was all right.

DR. BOXER

And that was very good in you, Langheinrich.

LANGHEINRICH

Naw! Pshaw! I ain't sayin' it on that account. By the way, though, before I forget. I got a little account standin' with your good mother--for taffeta an' silk an' needles an' thread. Some cloth, too. My wife used 'em sewing. I'll straighten that up very soon.

DR. BOXER

[_Deprecatingly._] Never mind. That matter will be arranged.

LANGHEINRICH

Ede!

EDE

All right?

LANGHEINRICH

Hurry along now! [_He takes up a heavy hammer._] If I don't go right on workin' I'll end by bustin' out o' my skin.

_EDE approaches with a white hot piece of iron in the tongs and holds it on the anvil._

LANGHEINRICH

Now we're goin' to start, Doctor! Down on it! Hit it now! [_He and DR. BOXER beat the iron, keeping time with each other._] Well, you see! It's got to go evenly. Doctor! Then I tell you the work's smooth as butter.

[_They stop hammering; EDE takes up the iron again, takes it into the smithy and holds it into the flame._

LANGHEINRICH

[_Takes up the water can again and sets it to his lips._] There ain't much to this!

[_Drinks._

EDE

Things like that makes you thirsty.

_LANGHEINRICH puts the can down._

LANGHEINRICH

You c'n believe me, Doctor: it was fine anyhow.

DR. BOXER

What was it that was go very fine?

LANGHEINRICH

Lord! I don't know! I don't know nothin' much. But when I met Constable Schulze I had a devil of a good time--that's what!

EDE

An' now a glass o' beer from Grabow over there. That's what I could stand fine just now.

LANGHEINRICH

Hurry! Get three steins! Dr. Boxer will pay for 'em.

_EDE wipes his hands on his apron and goes._

LANGHEINRICH

An' so you want to settle down here now! That ain't no bad idea neither. Only this: you got to be up to all kinds o' tricks here. An' if you want my advice, Doctor, don't go to people for nothin'.

DR. BOXER

Do you think that I'll be unmolested in other respects?

LANGHEINRICH

Aw, them old stories! Them's all outlawed by now. An' then, nowadays they can't worry people so much no more as they used to do under the old laws.

DR. BOXER

Well, at all events I'll make the attempt ... My political ardour has cooled off. If these people annoy me in spite of that, I'll simply trudge off again. I'll go back to sea, or I'll let myself be engaged ...

LANGHEINRICH

Pretty easy drownin' on water!

DR. BOXER

[_Continuing._] ... Then I'll let myself be engaged to go to Brazil with the Russian Jews.

LANGHEINRICH

What would you get out o' that?

DR. BOXER

Yellow fever, perhaps.

LANGHEINRICH

Anything else. Doctor? That wouldn't be nothin' for me!

DR. BOXER

I believe that.

LANGHEINRICH

Me go an' wear myself out for other people? Not me! No, sir! I don't do nothin' like that. An' why should I? Nobody don't give me nothin'. I tell you people in this world is a pretty sly set. I've had time to find that out.

DR. BOXER

You're a regular heathen: you're not a Christian at all!

LANGHEINRICH

That kind o' talk don't do much good with me. I'm a Christian just like all the rest is! The people that sit in the new church here ... 'cause they built a new church here now!... if them is Christians, the Lord forgive 'em.

DR. BOXER

That's easily said, Langheinrich. But one ought not to be a Pharisee. Where is your Christian long-suffering?

LANGHEINRICH

No, I ain't goin' in for long-sufferin'. I'm a sinner myself; that's true all right. But now you take this Dalchow here for instance! It'd take the devil to be long-sufferin' where _he's_ concerned! What did he do with that son o' his. He kicked him out, that's what, by night, in winter. Then he tied him up and beat him till he couldn't gasp. An' then he apprenticed the little feller to a butcher so that he had to drive out the sheep! An' all the time jabbin' at him an' overworkin' him till in the end the poor little crittur went an' drowned hisself in the lake. Just shook his head an' kept still an' then dived down an' that was the end.

DR. BOXER

[_Ironically._] I don't see what you've got against Dalchow, Langheinrich? He's a man who seems to understand his business magnificently.

LANGHEINRICH

Yes, ruinin' girls an' that sort o' thing, that's what. An' then beatin' his hat around their heads an' sayin': Out with the low strumpet! That's what they is all of a sudden when it's he that made 'em--_what_ they is!--Oh, an' then he's a great friend o' Wehrhahn's an' grunts out like a swine in public meetin's: There ain't no more morality these days ... an' there ought to be laws against such doin's ... an' so on, an' so on ... an' if you'd like to go to church, there the old rotten sinner sits an' turns up his eyes. [_A distant ringing of church bells if heard._] Listen to that! The sparrow is singin'.--I always calls that the sparrow, Doctor. I always says: the sparrow sings. I mean when them bells is ringin'. An' ain't I right that it's the sparrow that sings? 'Cause since Wehrhahn got that bird in his buttonhole them bells has begun to ring. An' if the bells didn't go an' ring, why he wouldn't have no decoration neither.

_EDE comes in grinning and carrying three steins of beer._

EDE

Oho, listen there, the sparrow is singin'.

LANGHEINRICH

Well, you see, he don't call it nothin' else no more. [_Each of the three holds a stein. They knock them together._] Your health! An' welcome back to the old country! [_They drink._] That's a fine evenin' this mornin'. I'd like to see this night by day.

DR. BOXER

Now I'm goin' to blaspheme a bit. I'm not opposed to the building of churches at all.

LANGHEINRICH

An' I ain't neither. People gets work! I didn't get any this time, though. An' even if there's a little trouble now an' then, Pastor Friderici an' a bit o' nonsense with coloured windows an' altar cloths--that don't do no harm. People has to have a little.

DR. BOXER

Yes, those people are entitled to cultivate their own pleasures. And then, Langheinrich, a higher principle has to be represented somehow.

LANGHEINRICH

Sure, an' it brings people out here too, you c'n believe me. Buildin' lots has gone up considerable.

EDE