Chapter 1

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The Clock that Had no Hands

And Nineteen Other Essays About Advertising

By Herbert Kaufman

New York George H. Doran Company

COPYRIGHT, 1908 BY THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE

COPYRIGHT, 1912 GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY

THE·PLIMPTON·PRESS [W·D·O] NORWOOD·MASS·U·S·A

Contents

PAGE

The Clock that Had no Hands 1

The Cannon that Modernized Japan 7

The Tailor who Paid too Much 13

The Man who Retreats before His Defeat 19

The Dollar that Can't be Spent 25

The Pass of Thermopylae 31

The Perambulating Showcase 37

How Alexander Untied the Knot 43

If It Fits You, Wear this Cap 49

You Must Irrigate Your Neighborhood 55

Cato's Follow-up System 61

How to Write Retail Advertising Copy 67

The Difference between Amusing and Convincing 75

Some Don'ts when You Do Advertise 79

The Doctor whose Patients Hang On 85

The Horse that Drew the Load 91

The Cellar Hole and the Sewer Hole 97

The Neighborhood of Your Advertising 103

The Mistake of the Big Steak 109

The Omelette Soufflé 113

The Clock that Had no Hands

Newspaper advertising is to business, what hands are to a clock. It is a direct and _certain_ means of letting the public know _what you are doing_. In these days of intense and vigilant commercial contest, a dealer who does not advertise is like _a clock that has no hands_. He has no way of recording his movements. He can no more expect a twentieth century success with nineteenth century methods, than he can wear the same sized shoes as a _man_, which fitted him in his _boyhood_.

His father and mother were content with neighborhood shops and bobtail cars; nothing better could be had in their day. They were accustomed to _seek_ the merchant instead of being sought _by_ him. They dealt "around the corner" in one-story shops which depended upon the _immediate friends_ of the dealer for support. So long as the city was made up of such neighborhood units, each with a full outfit of butchers, bakers, clothiers, jewelers, furniture dealers and shoemakers, it was possible for the proprietors of these little establishments to exist and make a profit.

But as population increased, transit facilities spread, sections became specialized, block after block was entirely devoted to stores, and mile after mile became solely occupied by homes.

The purchaser and the storekeeper _grew farther and farther apart_. It was _necessary_ for the merchant to find a _substitute_ for his direct personality, which _no longer served_ to draw customers to his door. _He had to have a bond between the commercial center and the home center._ Rapid transit eliminated distance but advertising was necessary to inform people _where_ he was located and _what he had to sell_. It was a natural outgrowth of changed conditions--the beginning of _a new era_ in trade which no longer relied upon personal acquaintance for success.

Something more wonderful than the fabled philosopher's stone came into being, and the beginnings of _fortunes which would pass the hundred million mark and place tradesmen's daughters_ upon _Oriental thrones_ grew from this new force. Within fifty years it has become as vital to industry as _steam_ to _commerce_.

Advertising is _not_ a _luxury_ nor a _debatable policy_. _It has proven its case._ Its record is traced in the skylines of cities where a hundred towering buildings stand as a lesson of reproach to the men who had the _opportunity_ but _not_ the _foresight_, and furnish a constant inspiration to the _young merchant_ at the _threshold_ of his career.

The Cannon that Modernized Japan

Business is no longer a man to man contact, in which the seller and the buyer establish a _personal_ bond, any more than battle is a hand-to-hand grapple wherein bone and muscle and sinew decide the outcome. _Trade_ as well as _war_ has changed aspect--_both are now fought at long range_.

Just as a present day army of heroes would have no opportunity to display the _individual_ valor of its members, just so a merchant who counts upon his direct acquaintanceship for success, is a relic of the past--_a business dodo_.

Japan changed her policy of exclusion to foreigners, after a fleet of warships battered down the Satsuma fortifications. The Samurai, who had hitherto considered their blades and bows efficient, discovered that one cannon was mightier than all the swords in creation--_if they could not get near enough to use them_. Japan profited by the lesson. She did not wait until _further_ ramparts were pounded to pieces but was satisfied with her _one_ experience and proceeded to modernize her methods.

The merchant who doesn't advertise is pretty much in the same position as that in which Japan stood when her eyes were opened to the fact that _times had changed_. The long range publicity of a competitor will as surely destroy his business as the cannon of the foreigners crumbled the walls of Satsuma. Unless you take the lesson to heart, unless you _realize_ the importance of advertising, not only as a means of _extending_ your business but for _defending_ it as well, you must be prepared to face the consequences of a folly as great as that of a duelist who expects to survive in a contest in which his _adversary_ bears a _sword twice the length of his own_.

Don't think that it's _too late_ to begin because there are so many stores which have had the advantage of years of cumulative advertising. The city is growing. It will grow even more next year. It needs _increased trading facilities_ just as it's hungry for new neighborhoods.

_But it will never again support neighborhood stores._ Newspaper advertising has reduced the value of being _locally prominent_, and five cent street car fares have cut out the advantage of being "_around the corner_." A store five miles away, can reach out through the columns of the daily newspaper and draw your next door neighbor to its aisles, while you sit by and see the people on your own block enticed away, without your being able to retaliate or secure _new_ customers to take their place.

It is not a question of your ability to _stand the cost_ of advertising but of being able to _survive without it_. The thing you have to consider is not only an _extension_ of your business but of holding _what you already have_.

Advertising is an _investment_, the cost of which is in the same proportion to its _returns_ as _seeds_ are to the _harvest_. And it is just as preposterous for you to consider publicity as an expense, as it would be for a farmer to hesitate over purchasing a _fertilizer_, if he discovered that he could _profitably increase_ his crops by _employing_ it.

The Tailor who Paid too Much

I was buying a cigar last week when a man dropped into the shop and after making a purchase told the proprietor that he had started a clothes shop around the corner and quoted him prices, with the assurance of best garments and terms.

After he left the cigar man turned to me and said:

"Enterprising fellow, that, he'll get along."

"But he _won't_," I replied, "and, furthermore, I'll wager you that he hasn't the sort of clothes shop that will _enable_ him to."

"What made you think that?" queried the man behind the counter.

"His theories are wrong," I explained; "he's relying upon word of mouth publicity to build up his business and he can't _interview enough individuals_ to compete with a merchant, who has sense enough to say the _same_ things he told you, to a _hundred thousand_ men, while he is telling it to _one_. Besides, his method of advertising is _too expensive_. Suppose he sees a _hundred_ persons every day. First of all, he is robbing his business of its necessary direction and besides, he is spending too much to reach every man he solicits."

"I don't quite follow you."

"Well, as the proprietor of a clothes shop his own time is so valuable that I am very conservative in my estimate when I put the cost of his soliciting at five cents a head.

"Now, if he were _really_ able and clever he would discover that he can talk to hundreds of thousands of people at a tenth of a cent per individual. There is not a newspaper in town the advertising rate of which is $1.00 per thousand circulation, for a space big enough in which to _display what he said to you_."

"I never looked at it _that_ way," said the cigar man.

It's only "_the man who hasn't looked at it that way_," who hesitates for an instant over the advisability and profitableness of newspaper publicity.

Newspaper advertising is the cheapest channel of communication ever established by man. A thousand letters with one-cent stamps, will easily cost fifteen dollars and not one envelope in ten will be opened because _the very postage_ is an invitation to the wastebasket.

If there were anything _cheaper_ rest assured that the greatest merchants in America would not spend individual sums ranging up to _half a million dollars a year and over_, upon this form of attracting trade.

The Man who Retreats before His Defeat

Advertising _isn't_ magic. There is no element of the black art about it. In its best and highest form it is _plain_ talk, _sane_ talk--_selling_ talk. Its results are in proportion to the _merit_ of the subject advertised and the _ability_ with which the advertising is done.

There are two great obstacles to advertising profit, and both of them arise from ignorance of the _real_ functions and workings of publicity.

The first is to advertise _promises_ which will not be _fulfilled_,--because all that advertising can do when it _accomplishes most_, is to influence the reader to _investigate_ your claims.

_If you promise the earth and deliver the moon, advertising will not pay you._

If you bring men and women to your store on _pretense_ and fail to _make good_, advertising will have _harmed_ you, because it has only drawn attention to the fact that you are to be _avoided_.

It is as _unjust_ to charge advertising with _failure_ under these conditions, as it would be for your _neighbor_ to rob a bank and make you responsible for _his_ misdeed. In brief, _advertised_ dishonesty is _even more profitless_ than _unexploited_ deception.

The other great error in advertising is to expect more _out_ of advertising than there is _in_ it.

_Advertising is seed which a merchant plants in the confidence of the community._ He must allow time for it to _grow_. Every successful advertiser has to be _patient_. The time that it takes to arrive at results rests entirely with the ability and determination devoted to the work. But you cannot turn back when you have traveled half way and declare that the _path_ is wrong.

You can't advertise for a _week_, and because your store isn't crowded, say it hasn't _paid_ you. It takes a certain period to attract the attention of readers. Everybody doesn't see what you print the _first_ time it appears. More will notice your copy the _second day_, _a great many more_ at the end of a month.

You cannot expect to win the confidence of the community to the same degree that other men have obtained it, without taking pretty much the same length of time that _they_ did. But you _can_ cut short the period between your introduction to your reader and his introduction to your _counters_, by spending _more_ effort in preparing your _copy_ and displaying a greater amount of convincingness.

You mustn't act like the little girl who sowed a garden and came out the _next day_ expecting to find it in _full bloom_. Her father had to explain to her that plants require _roots_ and that, although she could not _see_ what was going on, _the seeds were doing their most important work just before the flowers showed above ground_.

So _advertising is_ doing its most _important_ work before the big results eventuate, and to abandon the money which has been invested just before results arrive, is not only foolish but childish. _It would be just as logical for a farmer to desert his fields because he cannot harvest his corn a week after he planted it._

Advertising does not require _faith_--merely _common sense_. If it is begun in doubt and relinquished before normal results can be _reasonably_ looked for, the fault does not lie with the newspaper nor with publicity--the blame is solely on the head of the coward who _retreated before he was defeated_.

The Dollar that Can't be Spent

Every dollar spent in advertising is not only a _seed_ dollar which _produces a profit_ for the merchant, but is actually _retained_ by him even _after he has paid it to the publisher_.

Advertising creates _a good will_ equal to the cost of the publicity.

Advertising _really costs nothing_. While it _uses_ funds it does not _use them up_. It helps the founder of a business to grow rich and then _keeps_ his business alive after his death.

_It eliminates the personal equation._ It perpetuates confidence _in the store_ and makes it possible for a merchant _to withdraw_ from _business_ without having the _profits_ of the business _withdrawn_ from _him_. It changes a _name_ to an _institution_--an institution which will _survive_ its builder.

It is really an _insurance policy_ which costs nothing--_pays_ a premium each year instead of _calling for_ one and renders it possible to change the entire personnel of a business without disturbing its prosperity.

Advertising renders the _business_ stronger than the _man_--independent of his presence. It permanentizes systems of merchandising, the track of which is left for others to follow.

A business which is _not_ advertised _must_ rely upon the _personality_ of its proprietor, and personality in business is a decreasing factor. The public _does not want to know the man_ who owns the store--it isn't interested in _him_ but in his goods. When an unadvertised business is sold it is only worth as much as its _stock of goods and its fixtures_. There is no good will to be paid for--_it does not exist_--it has _not_ been _created_. The name over the door _means nothing_ except to the limited stream of people from the immediate neighborhood, any of whom could tell you _more_ about some store ten miles away which has regularly delivered its shop news to their breakfast table.

It is as _shortsighted_ for a man to build a business which _dies with his death_ or ceases with his inaction, as it _is unfair_ for him not to provide for the _continuance of its income to his family_.

The Pass of Thermopylae

Xerxes once led a million soldiers out of Persia in an effort to capture Greece, but his invasion failed utterly, because a Spartan captain had entrenched a hundred men in a narrow mountain pass, which controlled the road into Lacedaemon. _The man who was first on the ground had the advantage._

Advertising is full of opportunities for men who are _first_ on the ground.

There are hundreds of advertising passes waiting for some one to occupy them. The first man who realizes that his line will be helped by publicity, has a _tremendous opportunity_. He can gain an advantage over his competitors that they can never possess. Those who _follow_ him must spend more money to _equal_ his returns. They must not only _invest as much_, _to get as much_, but they must as well, spend an extra sum to _counteract_ the influence that he has _already established_ in the community.

Whatever men sell, whether it is actual merchandise or brain vibrations, can be _more easily_ sold with the aid of advertising. Not one half of the businesses which _should_ be exploited are appearing in the newspapers. _Trade grows as reputation grows and advertising spreads reputation._

If you are engaged in a line which is waiting for an advertising pioneer, realize what a wonderful chance you have of being the first of your kind to appeal directly to the public. You stand a better chance of leadership than those who have handicapped their strength, by permitting you to _get on the ground_ before they could outstrip you. You gain a prestige that those who _follow_ you, must spend more money to _counteract_.

If your particular line is _similar_ to some other trade or business which has _already_ been introduced to the reading public, it's up to you to start in _right now_ and join your competitors in contesting for the attention of the community. The longer you _delay_ the more you _decrease_ your chances of _surviving_. Every man who outstrips you is another _opponent_, who must be met and grappled with, for _the right of way_.

The Perambulating Showcase

The newspaper is a _huge_ shop window, carried about the city and delivered daily into hundreds of thousands of homes, to be examined at the leisure of the reader. This shop window is unlike the actual plate glass showcase only in _one_ respect--it makes display of _descriptions_ instead of _articles_.

You have often been impressed by the difference between the decorations of two window-trimmers, each of whom employed the same materials for his work. The one drew your attention and held it by the grace and cleverness and art manifested in his display. The other realized so little of the possibilities in the materials placed at his disposal, that unless some one called your attention to his mediocrities you would have gone on unconscious of their existence.

An advertiser must know that he gets his results in accordance with the _skill_ exercised in preparing his verbal displays. He must make people _stop_ and pause. _His copy has to stand out._

He must not only make a show of things that are attractive to the eye but are attractive to the people's needs, as well.

The window-trimmer must not make the mistake of thinking that the showiest stocks are the most salable. The advertiser must not make the mistake of thinking that the showiest words are the most clinching.

Windows are too few in number to be used with indiscretion. The good merchant puts those goods back of his plate glass which nine people out of ten will want, once they have seen them.

The good advertiser tells about goods which nine readers out of ten will buy, if they can be convinced.

Newspaper space itself is only the window, just as the showcase is but a frame for merchandise pictures. A window on a crowded street, in the best neighborhood, where prosperous persons pass continually, is more desirable, than one in a cheap, sparsely settled neighborhood. An advertisement in a newspaper with the most readers and the most _prosperous_ ones, possesses a great advantage over the same copy, in a medium circulating among persons who possess less means. It would be foolish for a shop to build its windows in an alley-way--and just as much so to put its advertising into newspapers which are distributed among "alley-dwellers."

How Alexander Untied the Knot

Alexander the Great was being shown the Gordian Knot. "It can't be untied," they told him; "every man who tried to do so, failed."

But Alexander was not discouraged because the _rest_ had flunked. He simply realized that he would have to go at it in a _different_ way. And instead of wasting time with his _fingers_, he drew his sword and _slashed_ it apart.

Every day a great business general is shown some knot which has proven too much for his competitors, and he succeeds, because he finds a way to _cut_ it. The fumbler has no show so long as there is a brother merchant who doesn't waste time trying to accomplish the impossible--who takes lessons from the _failures_ about him and avoids the methods which were their downfall.

The knottiest problems in trade are:

1--The problem of location.

2--The problem of getting the crowds.

3--The problem of keeping the crowds.

4--The problem of minimizing fixed expenses.

5--The problem of creating a valuable good will.

None of these knots is going to be untied by fumbling fingers. They are too complicated. They're all inextricably involved--so twisted and entangled that they can't be solved singly--like the Gordian knot _they must be cut through at one stroke_. And you can't cut the knot with anything but advertising--because:

1--A store that is constantly before the people makes its own neighborhood.

2--Crowds can be brought from anywhere by daily advertising.

3--Customers can always be held by inducements.

4--Fixed expenses can only be reduced by increasing the volume of sales.

5--Good will can only be created through publicity.

Advertising is breeding new giants every year and making them more powerful every hour. Publicity is the sustaining food of a _powerful_ store and the only strengthening nourishment for a _weak_ one. The retailer who delays his entry into advertising must pay the penalty of his procrastination by facing more giant competitors as each month of opportunity slips by.

Personal ability as a close purchaser and as a clever seller, doesn't count for a hang, so long as other men are equally well posted and wear the sword of publicity to boot. They are able to tie your business into constantly closer knots, while you cannot retaliate, because there is no knot which their advertising cannot cut for them.

Yesterday you lost a customer--today they took one--tomorrow they'll get another. You cannot cope with their competition because you haven't the weapon with which to oppose it. You can't untie your Gordian knot because it can't be _untied_--you've got to _cut_ it.

You must become an advertiser or you must pay the penalty of incompetence.

You not only require the newspaper to fight for a more _hopeful tomorrow_, but to keep _today's_ situation from becoming _hopeless_.

If It Fits You, Wear this Cap

Advertising isn't a crucible with which lazy, bigoted and incapable merchants can turn incompetency into success--but one into which brains and tenacity and courage _can_ be poured and changed into dollars. It is only a short cut across the fields--_not_ a moving platform. You can't "get there" without "going some."

It's a game in which the _worker_--not the _shirker_--gets rich.

By its measurement every man stands for what he _is_ and for what he _does_, _not_ for what he _was_ and what he _did_.

Every day in the advertising world is _another_ day and has to be taken care of with the same energy as its _yesterday_.

The quitter _can't survive_ where the _plugger_ has the ghost of a chance.

Advertising doesn't take the place of business talent or business management. It simply tells what a business _is_ and _how_ it is managed. The snob whose father _created_ and who is content to live on what was _handed_ to him, can't stand up against the man who knows he _must build for himself_.

What makes _you_ think that _you_ are entitled to prosper as well as a competitor who _works twice as hard_ for his prosperity?

Why should as many people deal at _your_ store, as patronize a shop that makes an endeavor to _get_ their trade and shows them that it is _worth while_ to come to its doors?