SCENE II.[1227

E. KNOWELL, MASTER STEPHEN, WELLBRED, BOBADILL, MASTER MATHEW.

[_Enter_] BRAINWORM, [_disguised as before_.]

_E. Know._ A miracle, cousin; look here, look here!

_Step._ Oh—God’s lid. By your leave, do you know me, sir?

_Brai._ Ay, sir, I know you by sight. 5

_Step._ You sold me a rapier, did you not?

_Brai._ Yes, marry, did I, sir.

_Step._ You said it was a Toledo, ha?

_Brai._ True, I did so.

_Step._ But it is none. 10

_Brai._ No, sir, I confess it; it is none.

_Step._ Do you confess it? Gentlemen, bear witness, he has confest it:—By God’s will, an you had not confest it——

_E. Know._ Oh, cousin, forbear, forbear! 15

_Step._ Nay, I have done, cousin.

_Wel._ Why, you have done like a gentleman; he has confest it, what would you more?

_Step._ Yet, by his leave, he is a rascal, under his favour, do you see. 20

_E. Know._ Ay, by his leave, he is, and under favour: a pretty piece of civility! Sirrah, how dost thou like him?

_Wel._ Oh, it’s a most precious fool, make much on him. I can compare him to nothing (25) more happily than a drum; for every one may play upon him.

_E. Know._ No, no, a child’s whistle were far the fitter.

_Brai._ Shall I entreat a word with you? 30

_E. Know._ With me, sir? You have not another Toledo to sell, ha’ you?

_Brai._ You are conceited,[1228] sir. Your name is Master Knowell, as I take it?

_E. Know._ You are i’ the right; you mean (35) not to proceed in the catechism, do you?

_Brai._ No, sir; I am none of that coat.

_E. Know._ Of as bare a coat, though. Well, say, sir. 39

_Brai._ [_taking_ E. KNOW. _aside_.] Faith, sir, I am but servant to the drum[1229] extraordinary, and indeed, this smoky varnish being washt off, and three or four patches remov’d, I appear your worship’s in reversion, after the decease of your good father,—Brainworm. 45

_E. Know._ Brainworm! ’Slight, what breath of a conjurer hath blown thee hither in this shape?

_Brai._ The breath o’ your letter, sir, this morning; the same that blew you to the Windmill, and your father after you. 51

_E. Know._ My father!

_Brai._ Nay, never start, ’tis true; he has follow’d you over the fields by the foot, as you would do a hare i’ the snow. 55

_E. Know._ Sirrah Wellbred, what shall we do, sirrah? My father is come over after me.

_Wel._ Thy father! Where is he?

_Brai._ At justice Clement’s house, in Coleman-street, where he but stays my return; and then—— 61

_Wel._ Who’s this? Brainworm!

_Brai._ The same, sir.

_Wel._ Why how, in the name of wit, com’st thou transmuted thus? 65

_Brai._ Faith, a device, a device; nay, for the love of reason, gentlemen, and avoiding the danger, stand not here; withdraw, and I’ll tell you all. 69

_Wel._ But art thou sure he will stay thy return?

_Brai._ Do I live, sir? What a question is that!

_Wel._ We’ll prorogue his expectation, then, a little: Brainworm, thou shalt go with us.—Come on, gentlemen.—Nay, I pray thee, 75 sweet Ned, droop not; ’heart, an our wits be so wretchedly dull, that one old plodding brain can outstrip us all, would we were e’en prest[1230] to make porters of, and serve out the remnant of our days in Thames-street, or at Customhouse (80) quay, in a civil war against the carmen!

_Brai._ Amen, amen, amen, say I. [_Exeunt._]