ACT III

[SCENE I.][3943]

_Enter_ ALONZO _and_ DE FLORES. (_In the act-time_[3944] DE FLORES _hides a naked rapier_) [_behind a door_.]

_De Flores._ Yes, here are all the keys; I was afraid, my lord, I ’d wanted for the postern, this is it. I ’ve all, I ’ve all, my lord: this for the sconce.[3945]

_Alon._ ’Tis a most spacious and impregnable fort.

_De F._ You ’ll tell me more, my lord. This descent 5 Is somewhat narrow, we shall never pass Well with our weapons, they ’ll but trouble us.

_Alon._ Thou sayest true.

_De F._ Pray, let me help your lordship.

_Alon._ ’T is done: thanks, kind De Flores.

_De F._ Here are hooks, my lord, To hang such things on purpose. 10 [_Hanging up his own sword and that of_ ALONZO.]

_Alon._ Lead, I ’ll follow thee. _Exeunt._[3946]

[SCENE II][3947]

[_Enter_ ALONZO _and_ DE FLORES.]

_De F._ All this is nothing; you shall see anon A place you little dream on.

_Alon._ I am glad I have this leisure; all your master’s house Imagine I ha’ taken a gondola.

_De F._ All but myself, sir,—[_aside_] which makes up my safety. 5 My lord, I ’ll place you at a casement here Will show you the full strength of all the castle. Look, spend your eye awhile upon that object.

_Alon._ Here’s rich variety, De Flores.

_De F._ Yes, sir.

_Alon._ Goodly munition.

_De F._ Ay, there’s ordnance, sir, 10 No bastard metal, will ring you a peal like bells At great men’s funerals. Keep your eye straight, my lord: Take special notice of that sconce[3945] before you, There you may dwell awhile. [_Takes the rapier which he had hid behind the door._]

_Alon._ I am upon ’t.

_De F._ And so am I. [_Stabs him._]

_Alon._ De Flores! O De Flores! 15 Whose malice hast thou put on?

_De F._ Do you question A work of secrecy? I must silence you. [_Stabs him._]

_Alon._ O, O, O!

_De F._ I must silence you. [_Stabs him._] So here ’s an undertaking well accomplish’d. This vault serves to good use now: ha, what ’s that 20 Threw sparkles in my eye? O, ’t is a diamond He wears upon his finger: ’t was well found; This will approve the work.[3948] What, so fast on? Not part in death? I ’ll take a speedy course then, Finger and all shall off. [_Cuts off the finger._] So, now I ’ll clear 25 The passages from all suspect or fear. _Exit with body._

[SCENE III.][3949]

_Enter_ ISABELLA _and_ LOLLIO.

_Isa._ Why, sirrah, whence have you commission To fetter the doors against me? If you keep me in a cage, pray, whistle to me, Let me be doing something.

_Lol._ You shall be doing, if it please you; (5) I ’ll whistle to you, if you ’ll pipe after.

_Isa._ Is it your master’s pleasure, or your own, To keep me in this pinfold?

_Lol._ ’T is for my master’s pleasure, lest being taken in another man’s corn, you might be (10) pounded in another place.

_Isa._ ’T is very well, and he ’ll prove very wise.

_Lol._ He says you have company enough in the house, if you please to be sociable, of all sorts of people. 15

_Isa._ Of all sorts? Why, here ’s none but fools and madmen.

_Lol._ Very well: and where will you find any other, if you should go abroad? There ’s my master and I to boot too. 20

_Isa._ Of either sort one, a madman and a fool.

_Lol._ I would ev’n participate of both then if I were as you; I know you’re half mad already, be half foolish too. 25

_Isa._ You’re a brave saucy rascal! Come on, sir, Afford me then the pleasure of your bedlam. You were commending once to-day to me Your last-come lunatic; what a proper[3950] Body there was without brains to guide it, 30 And what a pitiful delight appear’d In that defect, as if your wisdom had found A mirth in madness; pray, sir, let me partake, If there be such a pleasure.

_Lol._ If I do not show you the handsomest, (35) discreetest madman, one that I may call the understanding madman, then say I am a fool.

_Isa._ Well, a match, I will say so.

_Lol._ When you have had a taste of the madman, you shall, if you please, see Fool’s College, (40) o’ th’ [other] side. I seldom lock there; ’t is but shooting a bolt or two, and you are amongst ’em. _Exit. Enter presently._—Come on, sir; let me see how handsomely you ’ll behave yourself now. 45

_Enter_ FRANCISCUS.

_Fran._ How sweetly she looks! O, but there’s a wrinkle in her brow as deep as philosophy. Anacreon, drink to my mistress’ health, I’ll pledge it. Stay, stay, there ’s a spider in the cup! No, ’t is but a grape-stone; swallow it, (50) fear nothing, poet; so, so, lift higher.

_Isa._ Alack, alack, it is too full of pity To be laught at! How fell he mad? Canst thou tell?

_Lol._ For love, mistress. He was a pretty poet, too, and that set him forwards first; (55) the muses then forsook him; he ran mad for a chambermaid, yet she was but a dwarf neither.

_Fran._ Hail, bright Titania! Why stand’st thou idle on these flow’ry banks? Oberon is dancing with his Dryades; 60 I ’ll gather daisies, primrose, violets, And bind them in a verse of poesy.

_Lol._ [_holding up a whip._] Not too near! You see your danger.

_Fran._ O, hold thy hand, great Diomede! 65 Thou feed’st thy horses well, they shall obey thee: Get up, Bucephalus kneels. [_Kneels._]

_Lol._ You see how I awe my flock; a shepherd has not his dog at more obedience.

_Isa._ His conscience is unquiet; sure that was 70 The cause of this: a proper gentleman!

_Fran._ Come hither, Aesculapius; hide the poison.

_Lol._ Well, ’t is hid. [_Hides the whip._]

_Fran._ Didst thou ne’er hear of one Tiresias, A famous poet?

_Lol._ Yes, that kept tame wild geese. 75

_Fran._ That ’s he; I am the man.

_Lol._ No?

_Fran._ Yes; but make no words on ’t. I was a man Seven years ago.

_Lol._ A stripling, I think, you might.

_Fran._ Now I’m a woman, all feminine. 80

_Lol._ I would I might see that!

_Fran._ Juno struck me blind.

_Lol._ I’ll ne’er believe that; for a woman, they say, has an eye more than a man.

_Fran._ I say she struck me blind. 85

_Lol._ And Luna made you mad: you have two trades to beg with.

_Fran._ Luna is now big-bellied, and there ’s room For both of us to ride with Hecate; I’ll drag thee up into her silver sphere, 90 And there we’ll kick the dog—and beat the bush— That barks against the witches of the night; The swift lycanthropi[3951] that walks the round, We ’ll tear their wolvish skins, and save the sheep. [_Attempts to seize_ LOLLIO.]

_Lol._ Is ’t come to this? Nay, then, my (95) poison comes forth again. [_Showing the whip._] Mad slave, indeed, abuse your keeper!

_Isa._ I prithee, hence with him, now he grows dangerous.

_Fran._ [_sings._] Sweet love, pity me, Give me leave to lie with thee. 100

_Lol._ No, I’ll see you wiser first. To your own kennel!

_Fran._ No noise, she sleeps; draw all the curtains round, Let no soft sound molest the pretty soul But love, and love creeps in at a mouse-hole.

_Lol._ I would you would get into your hole! (_Exit_ FRANCISCUS.)—Now, mistress, I will (106) bring you another sort; you shall be fool’d another while. [_Exit, and brings in_ ANTONIO.]—Tony, come hither, Tony: look who ’s yonder, Tony. 110

_Ant._ Cousin, is it not my aunt?[3952]

_Lol._ Yes, ’t is one of ’em, Tony.

_Ant._ He, he! how do you, uncle?

_Lol._ Fear him not, mistress, ’tis a gentle nigget;[3953] you may play with him, as safely with him as with his bauble. 116

_Isa._ How long hast thou been a fool?

_Ant._ Ever since I came hither, cousin.

_Isa._ Cousin? I’m none of thy cousins, fool.

_Lol._ O, mistress, fools have always so much wit as to claim their kindred. 121

_Madman._ [_within._] Bounce, bounce! he falls, he falls!

_Isa._ Hark you, your scholars in the upper room Are out of order. 125

_Lol._ Must I come amongst you there?—Keep you the fool, mistress; I’ll go up and play left-handed Orlando amongst the madmen. _Exit._

_Isa._ Well, sir. 130

_Ant._ ’T is opportuneful now, sweet lady! nay, Cast no amazing eye upon this change.

_Isa._ Ha!

_Ant._ This shape of folly shrouds your dearest love, The truest servant to your powerful beauties, Whose magic had this force thus to transform me. 136

_Isa._ You ’re a fine fool indeed!

_Ant._ O, ’t is not strange! Love has an intellect that runs through all The scrutinous[3954] sciences; and, like a cunning poet, Catches a quantity of every knowledge, 140 Yet brings all home into one mystery, Into one secret that he proceeds in.

_Isa._ You ’re a parlous fool.

_Ant._ No danger in me; I bring nought but love And his soft-wounding shafts to strike you with. 145 Try but one arrow; if it hurt you, I Will stand you twenty back in recompense. [_Kisses her._]

_Isa._ A forward fool too!

_Ant._ This was love’s teaching: A thousand ways he fashion’d out my way, And this I found the safest and the nearest, 150 To tread the galaxia to my star.

_Isa._ Profound withal! certain you dream’d of this, Love never taught it waking.

_Ant._ Take no acquaintance Of these outward follies, there ’s within A gentleman that loves you.

_Isa._ When I see him, 155 I ’ll speak with him; so, in the meantime, keep Your habit, it becomes you well enough. As you ’re a gentleman, I ’ll not discover you; That ’s all the favour that you must expect. 159 When you are weary, you may leave the school, For all this while you have but play’d the fool.

_Re-enter_ LOLLIO.

_Ant._ And must again.—He, he! I thank you, cousin; I ’ll be your valentine to-morrow morning.

_Lol._ How do you like the fool, mistress?

_Isa._ Passing well, sir. 165

_Lol._ Is he not witty, pretty well, for a fool?

_Isa._ If he holds on as he begins, he ’s like To come to something.

_Lol._ Ay, thank a good tutor. You may put him to ’t; he begins to answer pretty hard (170) questions.—Tony, how many is five times six?

_Ant._ Five times six is six times five.

_Lol._ What arithmetician could have answer’d better? How many is one hundred and seven?

_Ant._ One hundred and seven is seven hundred and one, cousin. 176

_Lol._ This is no wit to speak on!—Will you be rid of the fool now?

_Isa._ By no means; let him stay a little.

_Madman._ [_within._] Catch there, catch the last couple in hell![3955] 181

_Lol._ Again! must I come amongst you? Would my master were come home! I am not able to govern both these wards together. _Exit._

_Ant._ Why should a minute of love ’s hour be lost? 185

_Isa._ Fie, out again! I had rather you kept Your other posture; you become not your tongue When you speak from[3956] your clothes.

_Ant._ How can he freeze 189 Lives near so sweet a warmth? Shall I alone Walk through the orchard of th’ Hesperides, And, cowardly, not dare to pull an apple?

_Enter_ LOLLIO _above_.

This with the red cheeks I must venture for. [_Attempts to kiss her._]

_Isa._ Take heed, there ’s giants keep ’em.

_Lol._ [_Aside._] How now, fool, are you good at that? Have you read Lipsius?[3957] He ’s past (196) _Ars Amandi_; I believe I must put harder questions to him, I perceive that.

_Isa._ You ’re bold without fear too.

_Ant._ What should I fear, Having all joys about me? Do you smile, And love shall play the wanton on your lip, 201 Meet and retire, retire and meet again; Look you but cheerfully, and in your eyes I shall behold mine own deformity, And dress myself up fairer. I know this shape Becomes me not, but in those bright mirrors 206 I shall array me handsomely.

[_Cries of madmen are heard within_,] _some as birds others as beasts_.

_Lol._ Cuckoo, cuckoo! _Exit_ [_above_].

_Ant._ What are these?

_Isa._ Of fear enough to part us; Yet are they but our schools of lunatics, That act their fantasies in any shapes, 210 Suiting their present thoughts: if sad, they cry; If mirth be their conceit, they laugh again: Sometimes they imitate the beasts and birds, Singing or howling, braying, barking; all As their wild fancies prompt ’em.

_Enter_ LOLLIO.

_Ant._ These are no fears. 215

_Isa._ But here ’s a large one, my man.

_Ant._ Ha, he! that ’s fine sport, indeed, cousin.

_Lol._ I would my master were come home! ’T is too much for one shepherd to govern two of these flocks; nor can I believe that one (221) churchman can instruct two benefices at once; there will be some incurable mad of the one side, and very fools on the other.—Come, Tony. 225

_Ant._ Prithee, cousin, let me stay here still.

_Lol._ No, you must to your book now; you have play’d sufficiently.

_Isa._ Your fool has grown wondrous witty.

_Lol._ Well, I ’ll say nothing: but I do not think but he will put you down one of these days. 231 _Exit with_ ANTONIO.

_Isa._ Here the restrained current might make breach, Spite of the watchful bankers. Would a woman stray, She need not gad abroad to seek her sin, It would be brought home one ways or [an]other: 235 The needle’s point will to the fixed north; Such drawing arctics womens’ beauties are.

_Re-enter_ LOLLIO.

_Lol._ How dost thou, sweet rogue?

_Isa._ How now?

_Lol._ Come, there are degrees; one fool may be better than another. 241

_Isa._ What’s the matter?

_Lol._ Nay, if thou giv’st thy mind to fool’s flesh, have at thee!

_Isa._ You bold slave, you! 245

_Lol._ I could follow now as t’ other fool did: “What should I fear, Having all joys about me? Do you but smile, And love shall play the wanton on your lip, 250 Meet and retire, retire and meet again; Look you but cheerfully, and in your eyes I shall behold my own deformity, And dress myself up fairer. I know this shape Becomes me not—” 255 And so as it follows: but is not this the most foolish way? Come, sweet rogue; kiss me, my little Lacedaemonian; let me feel how thy pulses beat. Thou hast a thing about thee would do a man pleasure, I’ll lay my hand on ’t. 261

_Isa._ Sirrah, no more! I see you have discovered This love’s knight errant, who hath made adventure For purchase of[3958] my love: be silent, mute, Mute as a statue, or his injunction 265 For me enjoying, shall be to cut thy throat; I ’ll do it, though for no other purpose; and Be sure he ’ll not refuse it.

_Lol._ My share, that ’s all; I ’ll have my fool’s part with you.

_Isa._ No more! Your master.

_Enter_ ALIBIUS.

_Alib._ Sweet, how dost thou?

_Isa._ Your bounden servant, sir. 270

_Alib._ Fie, fie, sweetheart, no more of that.

_Isa._ You were best lock me up.

_Alib._ In my arms and bosom, my sweet Isabella, I ’ll lock thee up most nearly.—Lollio, We have employment, we have task in hand. At noble Vermandero’s, our castle’s captain, 276 There is a nuptial to be solemnis’d— Beatrice-Joanna, his fair daughter, bride,— For which the gentleman hath bespoke our pains, A mixture of our madmen and our fools, 280 To finish, as it were, and make the fag[3959] Of all the revels, the third night from the first; Only an unexpected passage over, To make a frightful pleasure, that is all, But not the all I aim at. Could we so act it, To teach it in a wild distracted measure, 286 Though out of form and figure, breaking time’s head, It were no matter, ’t would be heal’d again In one age or other, if not in this: This, this, Lollio, there ’s a good reward begun, And will beget a bounty, be it known. 291

_Lol._ This is easy, sir, I ’ll warrant you: you have about you fools and madmen that can dance very well; and ’t is no wonder, your best dancers are not the wisest men; the reason is, with often jumping they jolt their brains 296 down into their feet, that their wits lie more in their heels than in their heads.

_Alib._ Honest Lollio, thou giv’st me a good reason, And a comfort in it.

_Isa._ You ’ve a fine trade on ’t. Madmen and fools are a staple commodity. 301

_Alib._ O wife, we must eat, wear clothes, and live. Just at the lawyer’s haven we arrive, By madmen and by fools we both do thrive. _Exeunt._

[SCENE IV.][3960]

_Enter_ VERMANDERO, BEATRICE, ALSEMERO, _and_ JASPERINO.

_Ver._ Valencia speaks so nobly of you, sir, I wish I had a daughter now for you.

_Als._ The fellow of this creature were a partner For a king’s love.

_Ver._ I had her fellow once, sir, But Heaven has married her to joys eternal; 5 ’T were sin to wish her in this vale again. Come, sir, your friend and you shall see the pleasures Which my health chiefly joys in.

_Als._ I hear The beauty of this seat largely [commended].[3961]

_Ver._ It falls much short of that. _Exit with_ ALSEMERO _and_ JASPERINO.

_Beat._ So, here ’s one step 10 Into my father’s favour; time will fix him; I ’ve got him now the liberty of the house. So wisdom, by degrees, works out her freedom; And if that eye be dark’ned that offends me,— I wait but that eclipse,—this gentleman 15 Shall soon shine glorious in my father’s liking, Through the refulgent virtue of my love.

_Enter_ DE FLORES.

_De F._ [_Aside._] My thoughts are at a banquet; for the deed, I feel no weight in’t; ’t is but light and cheap For the sweet recompense that I set down for’t.

_Beat._ De Flores?

_De F._ Lady?

_Beat._ Thy looks promise cheerfully. 21

_De F._ All things are answerable, time, circumstance, Your wishes, and my service.

_Beat._ Is it done, then?

_De F._ Piracquo is no more.

_Beat._ My joys start at mine eyes; our sweet’st delights 25 Are evermore born weeping.

_De F._ I’ve a token for you.

_Beat._ For me?

_De F._ But it was sent somewhat unwillingly; I could not get the ring without the finger. [_Producing the finger and ring_.]

_Beat._ Bless me, what hast thou done?

_De F._ Why, is that more 30 Than killing the whole man? I cut his heart-strings; A greedy hand thrust in a dish at court, In a mistake hath had as much as this.

_Beat._ ’T is the first token my father made me send him.

_De F._ And I [have] made him send it back again 35 For his last token. I was loth to leave it, And I’m sure dead men have no use of jewels; He was as loth to part with ’t, for it stuck As if the flesh and it were both one substance.

_Beat._ At the stag’s fall, the keeper has his fees; 40 ’T is soon appli’d, all dead men’s fees are yours, sir. I pray, bury the finger, but the stone You may make use on shortly; the true value, Take ’t of my truth, is near three hundred ducats.

_De F._ ’T will hardly buy a capcase[3962] for one’s conscience though, 45 To keep it from the worm, as fine as ’t is. Well, being my fees, I’ll take it; Great men have taught me that, or else my merit Would scorn the way on ’t.

_Beat._ It might justly, sir. Why, thou mistak’st, De Flores; ’t is not given In state[3963] of recompense.

_De F._ No, I hope so, lady; 51 You should soon witness my contempt to’t then.

_Beat._ Prithee,—thou look’st as if thou wert offended.

_De F._ That were strange, lady; ’t is not possible My service should draw such a cause from you. 55 Offended! Could you think so? That were much For one of my performance, and so warm Yet in my service.

_Beat._ ’T were misery in me to give you cause, sir.

_De F._ I know so much, it were so; misery 60 In her most sharp condition.

_Beat._ ’T is resolv’d then; Look you, sir, here’s three thousand golden florins; I have not meanly thought upon thy merit.

_De F._ What! Salary? Now you move me.

_Beat._ How, De Flores?

_De F._ Do you place me in the rank of verminous fellows, 65 To destroy things for wages? Offer gold For the life-blood of man? Is anything Valued too precious for my recompense?

_Beat._ I understand thee not.

_De F._ I could ha’ hir’d A journeyman in murder at this rate, 70 And mine own conscience might have [slept at ease],[3964] And have had the work brought home.

_Beat._ [_Aside._] I’m in a labyrinth; What will content him? I’d fain be rid of him. I’ll double the sum, sir.

_De F._ You take a course To double my vexation, that’s the good you do.

_Beat._ [_Aside._] Bless me, I’m now in worse plight than I was; 76 I know not what will please him.—For my fear’s sake, I prithee, make away with all speed possible; And if thou be’st so modest not to name The sum that will content thee, paper blushes not, 80 Send thy demand in writing, it shall follow thee; But, prithee, take thy flight.

_De F._ You must fly too, then.

_Beat._ I?

_De F._ I’ll not stir a foot else.

_Beat._ What’s your meaning?

_De F._ Why, are not you as guilty? In, I’m sure, As deep as I; and we should stick together. 85 Come, your fears counsel you but ill; my absence Would draw suspect upon you instantly; There were no rescue for you.

_Beat._ [_Aside._] He speaks home!

_De F._ Nor is it fit we two, engag’d so jointly, Should part and live asunder.

_Beat._ How now, sir? 90 This shows not well.

_De F._ What makes your lip so strange? This must not be ’twixt[3965] us.

_Beat._ The man talks wildly!

_De F._ Come, kiss me with a zeal now.

_Beat._ [_Aside._] Heaven, I doubt him!

_De F._ I will not stand so long to beg ’em shortly. 95

_Beat._ Take heed, De Flores, of forgetfulness, ’T will soon betray us.

_De F._ Take you heed first; Faith, you’re grown much forgetful, you’re to blame in’t.

_Beat._ [_Aside._] He’s bold, and I am blam’d for’t.

_De F._ I have eas’d you Of your trouble, think on it; I am[3966] in pain, 100 And must be eas’d of[3967] you; ’t is a charity, Justice invites your blood to understand me.

_Beat._ I dare not.

_De F._ Quickly!

_Beat._ O, I never shall! Speak it yet further off, that I may lose What has been spoken, and no sound remain on ’t; I would not hear so much offence again 106 For such another deed.

_De F._ Soft, lady, soft! The last is not yet paid for. O, this act Has put me into spirit; I was as greedy on ’t As the parcht earth of moisture, when the clouds weep. 110 Did you not mark, I wrought myself into ’t, Nay, su’d and kneel’d for ’t? Why was all that pains took? You see I ’ve thrown contempt upon your gold; Not that I want it [not],[3968] for I do piteously, 114 In order I ’ll come unto ’t, and make use on ’t, But ’t was not held so precious to begin with, For I place wealth after the heels of pleasure; And were not I resolv’d in my belief That thy virginity were perfect in thee, I should but take my recompense with grudging, 120 As if I had but half my hopes I agreed for.

_Beat._ Why, ’t is impossible thou canst be so wicked, Or shelter such a cunning cruelty. To make his death the murderer of my honour! Thy language is so bold and vicious, 125 I cannot see which way I can forgive it With any modesty.

_De F._ Pish! you forget yourself; A woman dipt in blood, and talk of modesty!

_Beat._ O misery of sin! would I ’d been bound Perpetually unto my living hate 130 In that Piracquo, than to hear these words! Think but upon the distance that creation Set ’twixt thy blood and mine, and keep thee there.

_De F._ Look but into your conscience, read me there; ’T is a true book, you ’ll find me there your equal. 135 Pish! fly not to your birth, but settle you In what the act has made you; you ’re no more now. You must forget your parentage to me; You ’re the deed’s creature; by that name You lost your first condition, and I challenge you, 140 As peace and innocency has turn’d you out, And made you one with me.

_Beat._ With thee, foul villain!

_De F._ Yes, my fair murd’ress. Do you urge me, Though thou writ’st maid, thou whore in thy affection? ’T was chang’d from thy first love, and that ’s a kind 145 Of whoredom in thy heart; and he ’s chang’d now To bring thy second on, thy Alsemero, Whom, by all sweets that ever darkness tasted, If I enjoy thee not, thou ne’er enjoy’st! I ’ll blast the hopes and joys of marriage, 150 I ’ll confess all; my life I rate at nothing.

_Beat._ De Flores!

_De F._ I shall rest from all love’s[3969] plagues then; I live in pain now; that shooting eye Will burn my heart to cinders.

_Beat._ O sir, hear me!

_De F._ She that in life and love refuses me, 155 In death and shame my partner she shall be.

_Beat._ [_kneeling._] Stay, hear me once for all; I make thee master Of all the wealth I have in gold and jewels; Let me go poor unto my bed with honour, And I am rich in all things!

_De F._ Let this silence thee: The wealth of all Valencia shall not buy 161 My pleasure from me; Can you weep Fate from its determin’d purpose? So soon may you weep me.

_Beat._ Vengeance begins; Murder, I see, is followed by more sins. 165 Was my creation in the womb so curst, It must engender with a viper first?

_De F._ [_raising her._] Come, rise and shroud your blushes in my bosom; Silence is one of pleasure’s best receipts: 169 Thy peace is wrought for ever in this yielding. ’Las! how the turtle pants! Thou ’lt love anon What thou so fear’st and faint’st to venture on. _Exeunt._