Part 5

“See that your lord has a clean shirt and hose, a short coat,[141] a doublet, and a long coat, if he wear such, his hose well brushed, his socks at hand, his shoes or slippers as brown as a water-leech.[140]

“In the morning, against your lord shall rise, take care that his linen be clean, and warm it at a clear fire, not smoky, if [the weather] be cold or freezing.

“When he rises make ready the foot-sheet, and forget not to place a chair or some other seat with a cushion on it before the fire, with another cushion for the feet. Over the cushion and chair spread this sheet so as to cover them; and see that you have a kerchief and a comb to comb your lord’s head before he is fully dressed.

“Then pray your lord in humble words to come to a good fire and array him thereby, and there to sit or stand pleasantly; and wait with due manners to assist him. First hold out to him his tunic, then his doublet while he puts in his arms, and have his stomacher well aired to keep off harm, as also his vamps[142] and socks, and so shall he go warm all day.

“Then draw on his socks and his hose by the fire, and lace or buckle his shoes, draw his hosen on well and truss them up to the height that suits him, lace his doublet in every hole, and put round his neck and on his shoulders a kerchief; and then gently comb his head with an ivory comb, and give him water wherewith to wash his hands and face.

“Then kneel down on your knee and say thus: ‘Sir, what robe or gown doth it please you to wear to-day?’ Then get him such as he asks for, and hold it out for him to put on, and do on his girdle, if he wear one, tight or loose, arrange his robe in the proper fashion, give him a hood or hat for his head, a cloak or _cappe-de-huse_,[143] according as it be fair or foul, or all misty with rain; and so shall ye please him. Before he goes out, brush busily about him, and whether he wear satin, sendal,[144] velvet, scarlet[145] or grain,[146] see that all be clean and nice.

“If he be prince or prelate or other potentate, before he go to church see that all things for the pew be made ready, and forget not cushion, carpet, curtain, beads or book.

“Then return in haste to your lord’s chamber, strip the clothes off the bed and cast them aside, and beat the feather-bed, but not so as to waste any feathers, and see that the blankets and sheets be clean. When you have made the bed mannerly, cover it with a coverlet, spread out the bench-covers,[147] and cushions, set up the head-sheet[148] and pillow, and remove the basin. See that carpets[149] be laid round the bed and dress the windows, and the cupboard with carpets[149] and cushions. See there be a good fire conveyed into the chamber, with plenty of wood and fuel to make it up....

“_The Wardrobe_

“You must attend busily to your lord’s wardrobe, to keep the clothes well, and to brush them cleanly. Use a soft brush, and remember that overmuch brushing easily wears out cloth.

“Never let woollen clothes or furs go a sevennight without being brushed or shaken, for moths be always ready to alight in them and engender; so always keep an eye on drapery and skinnery.

“If your lord take a nap after his meal to digest his stomach, have ready kerchief and comb, pillow and head-sheet; yet be not far from him—take heed what I say—for much sleep is not good in the middle of the day, and have ready water and towel so that he may wash after his sleep.

“When he has supped and goes to his chamber, spread forth your foot-sheet, as I have already shown you, take off his gown or whatever garment by the license of his estate he wears,[150] and lay it up in such place as ye best know. Put a mantle on his back to keep his body from cold, set him on the foot-sheet, made ready as I have directed, and pull off his shoes, socks and hosen, and throw these last over your shoulder, or hold them on your arm. Comb his hair, but first kneel down, and put on his kerchief and nightcap wound[150] in seemly fashion. Have the bed, head-sheet and pillow ready; and when he is in bed, there to sleep safe and sound, draw the curtains round about the bed, set there his night-light with wax or Paris-candle,[150] and see that there is enough to last the night, drive out the dog and the cat, giving them a clout, take no leave of your lord, but bow low to him and retire, and thus shall ye have thanks and reward whensoever it fall.”

“_A Bath or Stew so-called_

“If your lord wishes to bathe and wash his body clean, hang sheets round the roof, every one full of flowers and sweet green herbs, and have five or six sponges to sit or lean upon, and see that you have one big sponge to sit upon, and a sheet over so that he may bathe there for a while, and have a sponge also for under his feet, if there be any to spare, and always be careful that the door is shut. Have a basin full of hot fresh herbs and wash his body with a soft sponge, rinse him with fair warm rose-water, and throw it over him; then let him go to bed; but see that the bed be sweet and nice; and first put on his socks and slippers that he may go near the fire and stand on his foot-sheet, wipe him dry with a clean cloth, and take him to bed to cure his troubles.”

“_The Making of a Medicinable Bath_

“Boil together hollyhock,[151] mallow, wall pellitory and brown fennel, danewort, St. John’s wort, centaury, ribwort and camomile, heyhove, heyriff, herb-benet, bresewort, smallage, water speedwell, scabious, bugloss (?), and wild flax which is good for aches—boil withy leaves and green oats together with them, and throw them hot into a vessel and put your lord over it and let him endure for a while as hot as he can, being covered over and closed on every side; and whatever disease, grievance or pain ye be vexed with, this medicine shall surely make you whole, as men say.”

“_The Office of Usher and Marshal_

“An usher or marshal, without fail, must know all the estates of the Church, and the excellent estate of a king with his honourable blood. This is a notable nurture, cunning, curious and commendable.

“The estate of the Pope has no peer, an emperor is next him everywhere and a King is correspondent, a high cardinal next in dignity, then a King’s son (ye call him prince), an archbishop his equal; a duke of the blood royal; a bishop, marquis and earl coequal; a viscount, legate, baron, suffragan and mitred abbot; a baron of the exchequer, the three chief justices and the Mayor of London; a cathedral prior, unmitred abbot and knight bachelor; a prior, dean, archdeacon, knight and body esquire; the Master of the Rolls (as I reckon aright), and puisne judge; clerk of the crown and the exchequer, and you may pleasantly prefer the Mayor of Calais.[152]

“A provincial,[153] doctor of divinity and prothonotary[154] may dine together; and you may place the pope’s legate or collector with a doctor of both laws. An ex-mayor of London ranks with a serjeant-at-law, next a Mastery of Chancery, and then a worshipful preacher of pardons,[155] masters of arts, and religious orders, parsons and vicars, and parish priests with a cure, the bailiffs of a city, a yeoman of the crown, and serjeant-of-arms with his mace, with him a herald, the King’s herald in the first place, worshipful merchants and rich artificers, gentlemen well-nurtured and of good manners, together with gentlewomen and lords’ foster-mothers[156]—all these may eat with squires.

“Lo, son, I have now told you, after my simple wit, the rank of every estate according to his degree, and now I will show you how they should be grouped at table in respect of their dignity, and how they should be served.

“The pope, an emperor, king, cardinal, prince with a golden royal rod,[157] archbishop in his pall—all these for their dignity ought not to dine in the hall.

“A bishop, viscount, marquis, goodly earl may sit at two messes if they be agreeable thereunto.

“The Mayor of London, a baron, a mitred abbot, the three chief justices, the Speaker of Parliament—all these estates are great and honourable, and they may sit together in chamber or hall, two or three at a mess, if it so please them; but in your office you must try to please every man.

“The other estates, three or four to a mess, equal to a knight’s, are: unmitred abbot or prior, dean, archdeacon, Master of the Rolls, all the under judges and barons of the king’s exchequer, a provincial, a doctor of divinity or of both laws, a prothonotary, or the pope’s collector, if he be there, and the Mayor of the Staple.

“Other ranks you may set four to a mess, of persons equal to a squire in dignity, serjeants-at-law and ex-mayors of London, the masters of Chancery, all preachers, residencers, and parsons, apprentices of the law, merchants and franklins—these may sit properly at a squire’s table.

“Each estate shall sit at meat by itself, not seeing the others, at meal-time or in the field or in the town; and each must sit alone in the chamber or in the pavilion.

“The Bishop of Canterbury shall be served apart from the Archbishop of York, and the Metropolitan shall be served alone. The Bishop of York must not be served in the presence of the Primate of England.[158]

“Now, son, from divers causes, as equally from ignorance, a marshal is often puzzled how to rank lords of royal blood who are poor, and others not of royal blood who are rich, also ladies of royal blood wedded to knights, and poor ladies marrying those of royal blood. The lady of royal blood shall keep her rank, the lady of low blood and degree shall take her husband’s rank. The substance of livelihood[159] is not so digne[160] as royal blood, wherefore this prevails in chamber and hall, for some day blood royal might attain to the kingship.

“If the parents of a pope or cardinal be still alive, they must in no wise presume to be equal to their son, either sitting or standing. The estate of their son will not allow them either to sit or stand by him—nor should they desire it; wherefore they should have a separate chamber assigned to them.

“A marshal must look to the birth of each estate, and arrange officers such as chancellor, steward, chamberlain, treasurer, according to their degree.

“He must honour foreign visitors, and strangers to this land, even when they are resident here. A well-trained marshal should think beforehand how to place strangers at the table, for if they show gentle cheer and good manners, he thereby doth honour his lord and bring praise to himself.

“If the king send any messenger to your lord, if he be a knight, squire, yeoman of the crown, groom, page or child, receive him honourably as a baron, knight, squire, yeoman or groom,[161] and so forth, from the highest degree to the lowest, for a king’s groom may dine with a knight or a marshal.

“A commendable marshal must also understand the rank of all the worshipful officers of the commonalty of this land, of shires, cities and boroughs—such must be placed in due order, according to their rank.

“The estate of a knight of [good] blood and wealth is not the same as that of a simple and poor knight. Also, the Mayor of Queenborough[162] is not of like dignity with the Mayor of London—nothing like of degree; and they must on no account sit at the same table.

“The Abbot of Westminster is the highest in the land, and the Abbot of Tintern the poorest; both are abbots, yet Tintern shall neither sit nor stand with Westminster.[162] Also, the Prior of Dudley may in no wise sit with the Prior of Canterbury.[162] And remember, as a general rule, that a prior who is a prelate of a cathedral church, shall sit above any abbot or prior of his own diocese, in church, chapel, chamber or hall.

“Reverend doctors of twelve years’ standing shall sit above those of nine years’, although the latter may spend more largely of fine red gold. Likewise, the younger aldermen shall sit or stand below their elders, and so in every craft, the master first, and then the ex-warden.

“All these points, with many more, belong to the duty of a marshal; and so before every feast think what estates shall sit in the hall, and reason with yourself before your lord shall call upon you. If you are in any doubt, go either to your lord or to the chief officer, and then shall you do no wrong or prejudice to any state; but set all according to their birth, riches or dignity.

“Now, good son, I have shown you the courtesy of the court, and how to manage in pantry, buttery, cellar or in carving, as a sewer or as a marshal. I suppose ye be sure in these sciences, which in my day I learned with a royal prince, to whom I was usher and also marshal.

“All the officers I have mentioned have to obey me, ever to fulfil my commandment when I call, for our office is the chief in spicery and cellar, whether the cook be lief or loth.[163]

“All these divers offices may be filled by a single person, but the dignity of a prince requireth each office to have its officer and a servant waiting on him. Moreover, all must know their duties perfectly, for doubt and fear are a hindrance in serving a lord and pleasing his guests.

“Fear not to serve a prince—God be his speed! Take good heed to your duties, and be ever on the watch, and thus doing as ye should, there will be no need to doubt.

“Tasting is done only for those of royal blood, as pope, emperor, empress, cardinal, king, queen, prince, archbishop, duke or earl—none other that I call to remembrance. It is done for fear of poison, so let each man in office keep his room secure and close his safe,[164] chest and storehouse for fear of conspiracy.

“The steward and chamberlain of a prince of the blood must know about homages, services and fewte;[165] and as they have the oversight of all other offices and of the tasting, they must tell the marshal, sewer or carver, how to do it; and he must be in no fear when he tasteth.

“As the evening draws in, and I cannot tarry, I do not propose to contrive more of this matter. This treatise that I have entitled, if ye would prove it, I myself assayed in youth, when I was young and lusty; and I enjoyed these aforesaid matters, and took good heed to learn. But crooked age hath now compelled me to leave the court, so assay for yourself, my son, and God speed you!”

“Now, fair befall you, father, and blessings be on you for thus teaching me! I shall dare to do diligent service to divers dignitaries, where before I was afraid for the scantiness of my knowledge; I perceive the whole matter so perfectly that I am ready to try my part, and some good I may learn from practice and exercise. I am bound always to pray God reward you for your gentle teaching of me!”

“Now, good son, thyself and others that shall succeed thee to note, learn and read over this book of nurture, pray for the soul of John Russell, servant to Humphrey, Duke of Gloucester. Pray for that peerless prince, and for the souls of my wife and my father and mother, unto Mary, Mother and Maid, that she defend us from our foes, and bring us all to bliss when we go hence. Amen.”

[The _envoi_ may have been added later[166]]

“Go forth, little book, and lowly thou me commend, Unto all young gentlemen that list to learn or entend,[167] And specially to them that have experience, praying them to amend, And correct what is amiss, whereas I fail or offend. And if so that any be found as through my negligence, Cast the cause on my copy, rude and bare of eloquence, Which to draw out [I] have done my busy diligence, Readily to reform it by reason and better sentence.

As for rhyme or reason, the fore-writer was not to blame, For as he found it before him, so wrote he the same, And though he or I in our matter digress or degrade, Blame neither of us, for we never it made; Simple, as I had insight, somewhat the rhyme I correct. Blame I could no man, I have no person suspect. Now, good God, grant us grace our souls never to infect, Then we may reign in thy region eternally with thine elect.”

THE BOOK OF COURTESY

_Here beginneth the First Book of Courtesy_

WHOSO will of courtesy hear, In this book it is made clear. If thou be gentleman, yeoman or knave, Thee needeth nurture for to have. When thou comest to a lord’s gate, The porter thou shalt find thereat; Take[168] him thou shalt thy weapon to, And ask him leave in to go, To speak with lord, lady, squire or groom, Thereof thou must bethink thee soon; For if he be of low degree, Then him falls to come to thee. If he be gentleman of kin The porter thee will lead to him. When thou comest the hall door to, Take off thy hood, thy gloves off do. If the hall at the first meat be, Forget not this lesson concerns thee: The steward, controller and treasurer there, Sitting at the daïs, hail thou fair. Within the hall set on either side, Sit other gentlemen, as falls that tide. Incline thee fair to them also, First to the right hand thou shalt go, Sithen[169] to the left hand thine eye thou cast, To them thou bowest full fast. Take heed to yeomen on thy right hand, And sithen before the screen thou stand, Amid the hall upon the floor, While marshal or usher come fro the door, And bid thee sit or to board thee lead. Be stable of cheer for manners, take heed. If ye be set at a gentleman’s board, Look thou be hend[170] and little of word. Pare thy bread and carve in two The overcrust from the nether through. In four thou cut the overdole,[171] Set them together as it were whole, After, cut the nether crust in three, And turn it down—learn this of me. And set thy trencher thee before, And sit upright for any sore. Spare bread or wine, drink or ale, Till thy mess from the kitchen be set in hall, Lest men say thou art hunger-beaten, Or all men know thee for a glutton. Look thy nails be clean, in truth, Lest thy fellow loathe them, forsooth. Bite not thy bread and lay it down, That is no courtesy to use in town. As much as thou wilt eat, that break, The remnant left the poor shall take. In peace thou eat and ever eschew To quarrel at board—that may thee rue. If thou make mows in any wise A villainy thou catchest or ever thou rise, Let never thy cheek be great with meat, Or morsel of bread that thou shalt eat. An ape’s mow men say he makes That bread and flesh in his cheek bakes.[172] If any man speak that time to thee, And thou shalt answer, it will not be But wallowing,[172] and thou must abide; That is a shame for all beside. On both sides of thy mouth if thou eat, Many a scorning shalt thou get. Thou shalt not laugh nor speak nothing, While thy mouth be full of meat or drink. Nor sup thou not with great sounding, Neither pottage, nor other thing. Let not thy spoon stand in thy dish, Whether thou be served with flesh or fish, Nor lay it not on thy dish side, But cleanse it honestly without pride. Look that no dirt on thy finger be, To defoul the cloth before thee. In thy dish if thou wet thy bread, Look thereof that nought be led To drip again thy dish into; Thou art ill-bred if thou so do. Dry thy mouth ay well and fine, Whether thou shalt drink ale or wine, Nor call thou not a dish again That is taken from the board in plain.[173] If thou spit over the board or else on’t, Thou shalt be holden courtesy to want. If thine own dog thou scrape or claw For a vice that is held as men know. If thy nose thou cleanse, as may befall, Look thy hand thou cleanse withal; Privily with skirt do it away, Or else thro’ thy tippet that is so gay. At meat cleanse not thy teeth nor pick With knife or straw or wand or stick. While thou holdest meat in mouth, beware To drink, that is an unhonest chare;[174] And also physic forbids it quite, And says thou may be choked at that bite, If it go wrong thy throat into And stop thy wind, thou art fordo.[175] Nor tell thou never at board no tale To harm or shame thy fellow in hall; For if he then withhold his wrath, Eftsoons he will forecast thy death. Wheresoever thou sit at meat by the board, Avoid[176] the cat, at a bare word; For if thou stroke or cat or dog, Thou art like an ape tied with a clog. Also eschew, without strife, To foul the board-cloth[177] with thy knife. Nor blow not on thy drink or meat, Neither for cold, neither for heat. Nor bear with meat thy knife to mouth, Whether thou be set by strong or couth.[178] Nor with no board-cloth thy teeth thou clean Nor eyen that run red, as may be seen. If thou sit by a right good man This lesson look thou think upon: Under his thigh put not thy knee Thou art full lewd if thou let this be. Nor backward sitting give thou thy cup Neither to drink, neither to sup. Bid thy friend take cup and drink, That is holden an honest thing. Lean not on elbow at thy meat, Neither for cold nor for heat. Dip not thy thumb thy drink into; Thou art uncourteous if thou it do. In salt-cellar if thou put Or fish or flesh that men see it, That is a vice, as men me tells; And great wonder it would be else. After meat when thou shalt wash, Spit not in basin nor water dash, Nor spit not loosely for any meed Before a man of God for dread. Whosoever despises this lesson right At board to sit he has no might. Here endeth now our first talking. Christ grant us all his dear blessing!

_Here endeth the First Book of Courtesy_

THE SECOND BOOK