Chapter 51

Kate. I dare assure you sir, 'tis almost two, And 'twill be supper time ere you come there

Pet. It shall be seuen ere I go to horse: Looke what I speake, or do, or thinke to doe, You are still crossing it, sirs let't alone, I will not goe to day, and ere I doe, It shall be what a clock I say it is

Hor. Why so this gallant will command the sunne. Enter Tranio, and the Pedant drest like Vincentio.

Tra. Sirs, this is the house, please it you that I call

Ped. I what else, and but I be deceiued, Signior Baptista may remember me Neere twentie yeares a goe in Genoa

Tra. Where we were lodgers, at the Pegasus, Tis well, and hold your owne in any case With such austeritie as longeth to a father. Enter Biondello.

Ped. I warrant you: but sir here comes your boy, 'Twere good he were school'd

Tra. Feare you not him: sirra Biondello, Now doe your dutie throughlie I aduise you: Imagine 'twere the right Vincentio

Bion. Tut, feare not me

Tra. But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista

Bion. I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look't for him this day in Padua, Tra. Th'art a tall fellow, hold thee that to drinke, Here comes Baptista: set your countenance sir. Enter Baptista and Lucentio: Pedant booted and bare headed.

Tra. Signior Baptista you are happilie met: Sir, this is the gentleman I told you of, I pray you stand good father to me now, Giue me Bianca for my patrimony

Ped. Soft son: sir by your leaue, hauing com to Padua To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio Made me acquainted with a waighty cause Of loue betweene your daughter and himselfe: And for the good report I heare of you, And for the loue he beareth to your daughter, And she to him: to stay him not too long, I am content in a good fathers care To haue him matcht, and if you please to like No worse then I, vpon some agreement Me shall you finde readie and willing With one consent to haue her so bestowed: For curious I cannot be with you Signior Baptista, of whom I heare so well

Bap. Sir, pardon me in what I haue to say, Your plainnesse and your shortnesse please me well: Right true it is your sonne Lucentio here Doth loue my daughter, and she loueth him, Or both dissemble deepely their affections: And therefore if you say no more then this, That like a Father you will deale with him, And passe my daughter a sufficient dower, The match is made, and all is done, Your sonne shall haue my daughter with consent

Tra. I thanke you sir, where then doe you know best We be affied and such assurance tane, As shall with either parts agreement stand

Bap. Not in my house Lucentio, for you know Pitchers haue eares, and I haue manie seruants, Besides old Gremio is harkning still, And happilie we might be interrupted

Tra. Then at my lodging, and it like you, There doth my father lie: and there this night Weele passe the businesse priuately and well: Send for your daughter by your seruant here, My Boy shall fetch the Scriuener presentlie, The worst is this that at so slender warning, You are like to haue a thin and slender pittance

Bap. It likes me well: Cambio hie you home, and bid Bianca make her readie straight: And if you will tell what hath hapned, Lucentios Father is arriued in Padua, And how she's like to be Lucentios wife

Biond. I praie the gods she may withall my heart. Enter.

Tran. Dallie not with the gods, but get thee gone. Enter Peter.

Signior Baptista, shall I leade the way, Welcome, one messe is like to be your cheere, Come sir, we will better it in Pisa

Bap. I follow you.

Exeunt.

Enter Lucentio and Biondello.

Bion. Cambio

Luc. What saist thou Biondello

Biond. You saw my Master winke and laugh vpon you? Luc. Biondello, what of that? Biond. Faith nothing: but has left mee here behinde to expound the meaning or morrall of his signes and tokens

Luc. I pray thee moralize them

Biond. Then thus: Baptista is safe talking with the deceiuing Father of a deceitfull sonne

Luc. And what of him? Biond. His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper

Luc. And then

Bio. The old Priest at Saint Lukes Church is at your command at all houres

Luc. And what of all this

Bion. I cannot tell, expect they are busied about a counterfeit assurance: take you assurance of her, Cum preuilegio ad Impremendum solem, to th' Church take the Priest, Clarke, and some sufficient honest witnesses: If this be not that you looke for, I haue no more to say, But bid Bianca farewell for euer and a day

Luc. Hear'st thou Biondello

Biond. I cannot tarry: I knew a wench maried in an afternoone as shee went to the Garden for Parseley to stuffe a Rabit, and so may you sir: and so adew sir, my Master hath appointed me to goe to Saint Lukes to bid the Priest be readie to come against you come with your appendix. Enter.

Luc. I may and will, if she be so contented: She will be pleas'd, then wherefore should I doubt: Hap what hap may, Ile roundly goe about her: It shall goe hard if Cambio goe without her. Enter.

Enter Petruchio, Kate, Hortentio

Petr. Come on a Gods name, once more toward our fathers: Good Lord how bright and goodly shines the Moone

Kate. The Moone, the Sunne: it is not Moonelight now

Pet. I say it is the Moone that shines so bright

Kate. I know it is the Sunne that shines so bright

Pet. Now by my mothers sonne, and that's my selfe, It shall be moone, or starre, or what I list, Or ere I iourney to your Fathers house: Goe on, and fetch our horses backe againe, Euermore crost and crost, nothing but crost

Hort. Say as he saies, or we shall neuer goe

Kate. Forward I pray, since we haue come so farre, And be it moone, or sunne, or what you please: And if you please to call it a rush Candle, Henceforth I vowe it shall be so for me

Petr. I say it is the Moone

Kate. I know it is the Moone

Petr. Nay then you lye: it is the blessed Sunne

Kate. Then God be blest, it is the blessed sun, But sunne it is not, when you say it is not, And the Moone changes euen as your minde: What you will haue it nam'd, euen that it is, And so it shall be so for Katherine

Hort. Petruchio, goe thy waies, the field is won

Petr. Well, forward, forward, thus the bowle should run, And not vnluckily against the Bias: But soft, Company is comming here. Enter Vincentio.

Good morrow gentle Mistris, where away: Tell me sweete Kate, and tell me truely too, Hast thou beheld a fresher Gentlewoman: Such warre of white and red within her cheekes: What stars do spangle heauen with such beautie, As those two eyes become that heauenly face? Faire louely Maide, once more good day to thee: Sweete Kate embrace her for her beauties sake

Hort. A will make the man mad to make the woman of him

Kate. Yong budding Virgin, faire, and fresh, & sweet, Whether away, or whether is thy aboade? Happy the Parents of so faire a childe; Happier the man whom fauourable stars A lots thee for his louely bedfellow

Petr. Why how now Kate, I hope thou art not mad, This is a man old, wrinckled, faded, withered, And not a Maiden, as thou saist he is

Kate. Pardon old father my mistaking eies, That haue bin so bedazled with the sunne, That euery thing I looke on seemeth greene: Now I perceiue thou art a reuerent Father: Pardon I pray thee for my mad mistaking

Petr. Do good old grandsire, & withall make known Which way thou trauellest, if along with vs, We shall be ioyfull of thy companie

Vin. Faire Sir, and you my merry Mistris, That with your strange encounter much amasde me: My name is call'd Vincentio, my dwelling Pisa, And bound I am to Padua, there to visite A sonne of mine, which long I haue not seene

Petr. What is his name? Vinc. Lucentio gentle sir

Petr. Happily met, the happier for thy sonne: And now by Law, as well as reuerent age, I may intitle thee my louing Father, The sister to my wife, this Gentlewoman, Thy Sonne by this hath married: wonder not, Nor be not grieued, she is of good esteeme, Her dowrie wealthie, and of worthie birth; Beside, so qualified, as may beseeme The Spouse of any noble Gentleman: Let me imbrace with old Vincentio, And wander we to see thy honest sonne, Who will of thy arriuall be full ioyous

Vinc. But is this true, or is it else your pleasure, Like pleasant trauailors to breake a Iest Vpon the companie you ouertake? Hort. I doe assure thee father so it is

Petr. Come goe along and see the truth hereof, For our first merriment hath made thee iealous.

Exeunt.

Hor. Well Petruchio, this has put me in heart; Haue to my Widdow, and if she froward, Then hast thou taught Hortentio to be vntoward. Enter.

Enter Biondello, Lucentio and Bianca, Gremio is out before.

Biond. Softly and swiftly sir, for the Priest is ready

Luc. I flie Biondello; but they may chance to neede thee at home, therefore leaue vs. Enter.

Biond. Nay faith, Ile see the Church a your backe, and then come backe to my mistris as soone as I can

Gre. I maruaile Cambio comes not all this while. Enter Petruchio, Kate, Vincentio, Grumio with Attendants.

Petr. Sir heres the doore, this is Lucentios house, My Fathers beares more toward the Market-place, Thither must I, and here I leaue you sir

Vin. You shall not choose but drinke before you go, I thinke I shall command your welcome here; And by all likelihood some cheere is toward.

Knock.

Grem. They're busie within, you were best knocke lowder.

Pedant lookes out of the window.

Ped. What's he that knockes as he would beat downe the gate? Vin. Is Signior Lucentio within sir? Ped. He's within sir, but not to be spoken withall

Vinc. What if a man bring him a hundred pound or two to make merrie withall

Ped. Keepe your hundred pounds to your selfe, hee shall neede none so long as I liue

Petr. Nay, I told you your sonne was well beloued in Padua: doe you heare sir, to leaue friuolous circumstances, I pray you tell signior Lucentio that his Father is come from Pisa, and is here at the doore to speake with him

Ped. Thou liest his Father is come from Padua, and here looking out at the window

Vin. Art thou his father? Ped. I sir, so his mother saies, if I may beleeue her

Petr. Why how now gentleman: why this is flat knauerie to take vpon you another mans name

Peda. Lay hands on the villaine, I beleeue a meanes to cosen some bodie in this Citie vnder my countenance. Enter Biondello.

Bio. I haue seene them in the Church together, God send 'em good shipping: but who is here? mine old Master Vincentio: now wee are vndone and brought to nothing

Vin. Come hither crackhempe

Bion. I hope I may choose Sir

Vin. Come hither you rogue, what haue you forgot mee? Biond. Forgot you, no sir: I could not forget you, for I neuer saw you before in all my life

Vinc. What, you notorious villaine, didst thou neuer see thy Mistris father, Vincentio? Bion. What my old worshipfull old master? yes marie sir see where he lookes out of the window

Vin. Ist so indeede.

He beates Biondello.

Bion. Helpe, helpe, helpe, here's a mad man will murder me

Pedan. Helpe, sonne, helpe signior Baptista

Petr. Preethe Kate let's stand aside and see the end of this controuersie. Enter Pedant with seruants, Baptista, Tranio.

Tra. Sir, what are you that offer to beate my seruant? Vinc. What am I sir: nay what are you sir: oh immortall Goddes: oh fine villaine, a silken doublet, a veluet hose, a scarlet cloake, and a copataine hat: oh I am vndone, I am vndone: while I plaie the good husband at home, my sonne and my seruant spend all at the vniuersitie

Tra. How now, what's the matter? Bapt. What is the man lunaticke? Tra. Sir, you seeme a sober ancient Gentleman by your habit: but your words shew you a mad man: why sir, what cernes it you, if I weare Pearle and gold: I thank my good Father, I am able to maintaine it

Vin. Thy father: oh villaine, he is a Saile-maker in Bergamo

Bap. You mistake sir, you mistake sir, praie what do you thinke is his name? Vin. His name, as if I knew not his name: I haue brought him vp euer since he was three yeeres old, and his name is Tronio

Ped. Awaie, awaie mad asse, his name is Lucentio, and he is mine onelie sonne and heire to the Lands of me signior Vincentio

Ven. Lucentio: oh he hath murdred his Master; laie hold on him I charge you in the Dukes name: oh my sonne, my sonne: tell me thou villaine, where is my son Lucentio? Tra. Call forth an officer: Carrie this mad knaue to the Iaile: father Baptista, I charge you see that hee be forth comming

Vinc. Carrie me to the Iaile? Gre. Staie officer, he shall not go to prison

Bap. Talke not signior Gremio: I saie he shall goe to prison

Gre. Take heede signior Baptista, least you be conicatcht in this businesse: I dare sweare this is the right Vincentio

Ped. Sweare if thou dar'st

Gre. Naie, I dare not sweare it

Tran. Then thou wert best saie that I am not Lucentio

Gre. Yes, I know thee to be signior Lucentio

Bap. Awaie with the dotard, to the Iaile with him. Enter Biondello, Lucentio and Bianeu.

Vin. Thus strangers may be haild and abusd: oh monstrous villaine

Bion. Oh we are spoil'd, and yonder he is, denie him, forsweare him, or else we are all vndone.

Exit Biondello, Tranio and Pedant as fast as may be.

Luc. Pardon sweete father.

Kneele.

Vin. Liues my sweete sonne? Bian. Pardon deere father

Bap. How hast thou offended, where is Lucentio? Luc. Here's Lucentio, right sonne to the right Vincentio, That haue by marriage made thy daughter mine, While counterfeit supposes bleer'd thine eine

Gre. Here's packing with a witnesse to deceiue vs all

Vin. Where is that damned villaine Tranio, That fac'd and braued me in this matter so? Bap. Why, tell me is not this my Cambio? Bian. Cambio is chang'd into Lucentio

Luc. Loue wrought these miracles. Biancas loue Made me exchange my state with Tranio, While he did beare my countenance in the towne, And happilie I haue arriued at the last Vnto the wished hauen of my blisse: What Tranio did, my selfe enforst him to; Then pardon him sweete Father for my sake

Vin. Ile slit the villaines nose that would haue sent me to the Iaile

Bap. But doe you heare sir, haue you married my daughter without asking my good will? Vin. Feare not Baptista, we will content you, goe to: but I will in to be reueng'd for this villanie. Enter.

Bap. And I to sound the depth of this knauerie. Enter.

Luc. Looke not pale Bianca, thy father will not frown.

Exeunt.

Gre. My cake is dough, but Ile in among the rest, Out of hope of all, but my share of the feast

Kate. Husband let's follow, to see the end of this adoe

Petr. First kisse me Kate, and we will

Kate. What in the midst of the streete? Petr. What art thou asham'd of me? Kate. No sir, God forbid, but asham'd to kisse

Petr. Why then let's home againe: Come Sirra let's awaie

Kate. Nay, I will giue thee a kisse, now praie thee Loue staie

Petr. Is not this well? come my sweete Kate. Better once then neuer, for neuer to late.

Exeunt.

Actus Quintus.

Enter Baptista, Vincentio, Gremio, the Pedant, Lucentio, and Bianca. Tranio, Biondello Grumio, and Widdow: The Seruingmen with Tranio bringing in a Banquet.

Luc. At last, though long, our iarring notes agree, And time it is when raging warre is come, To smile at scapes and perils ouerblowne: My faire Bianca bid my father welcome, While I with selfesame kindnesse welcome thine: Brother Petruchio, sister Katerina, And thou Hortentio with thy louing Widdow: Feast with the best, and welcome to my house, My Banket is to close our stomakes vp After our great good cheere: praie you sit downe, For now we sit to chat as well as eate

Petr. Nothing but sit and sit, and eate and eate

Bap. Padua affords this kindnesse, sonne Petruchio

Petr. Padua affords nothing but what is kinde

Hor. For both our sakes I would that word were true

Pet. Now for my life Hortentio feares his Widow

Wid. Then neuer trust me if I be affeard

Petr. You are verie sencible, and yet you misse my sence: I meane Hortentio is afeard of you

Wid. He that is giddie thinks the world turns round

Petr. Roundlie replied

Kat. Mistris, how meane you that? Wid. Thus I conceiue by him

Petr. Conceiues by me, how likes Hortentio that? Hor. My Widdow saies, thus she conceiues her tale

Petr. Verie well mended: kisse him for that good Widdow

Kat. He that is giddie thinkes the world turnes round, I praie you tell me what you meant by that

Wid. Your housband being troubled with a shrew, Measures my husbands sorrow by his woe: And now you know my meaning

Kate. A verie meane meaning

Wid. Right, I meane you

Kat. And I am meane indeede, respecting you

Petr. To her Kate

Hor. To her Widdow

Petr. A hundred marks, my Kate does put her down

Hor. That's my office Petr. Spoke like an Officer: ha to the lad.

Drinkes to Hortentio.

Bap. How likes Gremio these quicke witted folkes? Gre. Beleeue me sir, they But together well

Bian. Head, and but an hastie witted bodie, Would say your Head and But were head and horne

Vin. I Mistris Bride, hath that awakened you? Bian. I, but not frighted me, therefore Ile sleepe againe

Petr. Nay that you shall not since you haue begun: Haue at you for a better iest or too

Bian. Am I your Bird, I meane to shift my bush, And then pursue me as you draw your Bow. You are welcome all.

Exit Bianca.

Petr. She hath preuented me, here signior Tranio, This bird you aim'd at, though you hit her not, Therefore a health to all that shot and mist

Tri. Oh sir, Lucentio slipt me like his Gray-hound, Which runs himselfe, and catches for his Master

Petr. A good swift simile, but something currish

Tra. 'Tis well sir that you hunted for your selfe: 'Tis thought your Deere does hold you at a baie

Bap. Oh, oh Petruchio, Tranio hits you now

Luc. I thanke thee for that gird good Tranio

Hor. Confesse, confesse, hath he not hit you here? Petr. A has a little gald me I confesse: And as the Iest did glaunce awaie from me, 'Tis ten to one it maim'd you too out right

Bap. Now in good sadnesse sonne Petruchio, I thinke thou hast the veriest shrew of all

Petr. Well, I say no: and therefore sir assurance, Let's each one send vnto his wife, And he whose wife is most obedient, To come at first when he doth send for her, Shall win the wager which we will propose

Hort. Content, what's the wager? Luc. Twentie crownes

Petr. Twentie crownes, Ile venture so much of my Hawke or Hound, But twentie times so much vpon my Wife

Luc. A hundred then

Hor. Content

Petr. A match, 'tis done

Hor. Who shall begin? Luc. That will I. Goe Biondello, bid your Mistris come to me

Bio. I goe. Enter.

Bap. Sonne, Ile be your halfe, Bianca comes

Luc. Ile haue no halues: Ile beare it all my selfe. Enter Biondello.

How now, what newes? Bio. Sir, my Mistris sends you word That she is busie, and she cannot come

Petr. How? she's busie, and she cannot come: is that an answere? Gre. I, and a kinde one too: Praie God sir your wife send you not a worse

Petr. I hope better

Hor. Sirra Biondello, goe and intreate my wife to come to me forthwith.

Exit. Bion.

Pet. Oh ho, intreate her, nay then shee must needes come

Hor. I am affraid sir, doe what you can Enter Biondello.

Yours will not be entreated: Now, where's my wife? Bion. She saies you haue some goodly Iest in hand, She will not come: she bids you come to her

Petr. Worse and worse, she will not come: Oh vilde, intollerable, not to be indur'd: Sirra Grumio, goe to your Mistris, Say I command her come to me. Enter.

Hor. I know her answere

Pet. What? Hor. She will not

Petr. The fouler fortune mine, and there an end. Enter Katerina.

Bap. Now by my hollidam here comes Katerina

Kat. What is your will sir, that you send for me? Petr. Where is your sister, and Hortensios wife? Kate. They sit conferring by the Parler fire

Petr. Goe fetch them hither, if they denie to come, Swinge me them soundly forth vnto their husbands: Away I say, and bring them hither straight

Luc. Here is a wonder, if you talke of a wonder

Hor. And so it is: I wonder what it boads

Petr. Marrie peace it boads, and loue, and quiet life, An awfull rule, and right supremicie: And to be short, what not, that's sweete and happie

Bap. Now faire befall thee good Petruchio; The wager thou hast won, and I will adde Vnto their losses twentie thousand crownes, Another dowrie to another daughter, For she is chang'd as she had neuer bin

Petr. Nay, I will win my wager better yet, And show more signe of her obedience, Her new built vertue and obedience. Enter Kate, Bianca, and Widdow.

See where she comes, and brings your froward Wiues As prisoners to her womanlie perswasion: Katerine, that Cap of yours becomes you not, Off with that bable, throw it vnderfoote

Wid. Lord let me neuer haue a cause to sigh, Till I be brought to such a sillie passe

Bian. Fie what a foolish dutie call you this? Luc. I would your dutie were as foolish too: The wisdome of your dutie faire Bianca, Hath cost me fiue hundred crownes since supper time

Bian. The more foole you for laying on my dutie

Pet. Katherine I charge thee tell these head-strong women, what dutie they doe owe their Lords and husbands

Wid. Come, come, your mocking: we will haue no telling

Pet. Come on I say, and first begin with her

Wid. She shall not

Pet. I say she shall, and first begin with her

Kate. Fie, fie, vnknit that threatning vnkinde brow, And dart not scornefull glances from those eies, To wound thy Lord, thy King, thy Gouernour. It blots thy beautie, as frosts doe bite the Meads, Confounds thy fame, as whirlewinds shake faire budds, And in no sence is meete or amiable. A woman mou'd, is like a fountaine troubled, Muddie, ill seeming, thicke, bereft of beautie, And while it is so, none so dry or thirstie Will daigne to sip, or touch one drop of it. Thy husband is thy Lord, thy life, thy keeper, Thy head, thy soueraigne: One that cares for thee, And for thy maintenance. Commits his body To painfull labour, both by sea and land: To watch the night in stormes, the day in cold, Whil'st thou ly'st warme at home, secure and safe, And craues no other tribute at thy hands, But loue, faire lookes, and true obedience; Too little payment for so great a debt. Such dutie as the subiect owes the Prince, Euen such a woman oweth to her husband: And when she is froward, peeuish, sullen, sowre, And not obedient to his honest will, What is she but a foule contending Rebell, And gracelesse Traitor to her louing Lord? I am asham'd that women are so simple, To offer warre, where they should kneele for peace: Or seeke for rule, supremacie, and sway, When they are bound to serue, loue, and obay. Why are our bodies soft, and weake, and smooth, Vnapt to toyle and trouble in the world, But that our soft conditions, and our harts, Should well agree with our externall parts? Come, come, you froward and vnable wormes, My minde hath bin as bigge as one of yours, My heart as great, my reason haplie more, To bandie word for word, and frowne for frowne; But now I see our Launces are but strawes: Our strength as weake, our weakenesse past compare, That seeming to be most, which we indeed least are. Then vale your stomackes, for it is no boote, And place your hands below your husbands foote: In token of which dutie, if he please, My hand is readie, may it do him ease

Pet. Why there's a wench: Come on, and kisse mee Kate

Luc. Well go thy waies olde Lad for thou shalt ha't

Vin. Tis a good hearing, when children are toward

Luc. But a harsh hearing, when women are froward, Pet. Come Kate, wee'le to bed, We three are married, but you two are sped. 'Twas I wonne the wager, though you hit the white, And being a winner, God giue you good night.

Exit Petruchio

Horten. Now goe thy wayes, thou hast tam'd a curst Shrow

Luc. Tis a wonder, by your leaue, she wil be tam'd so.

FINIS. THE Taming of the Shrew.

All's Well, that Ends Well

Actus primus. Scoena Prima.

Enter yong Bertram Count of Rossillion, his Mother, and Helena, Lord Lafew, all in blacke.

Mother. In deliuering my sonne from me, I burie a second husband