SCENE III.—_MISS EVELYN’S drawing-room. KATY seated on sofa,

C., with the skirts of her dress spread out so as to make as great a display as possible. Enter ANN, BRIDGET, MARY and JAMES, R. All but MARY make low bows to her. She acknowledges the salutations by a slight inclination of her head._

J. This must be a very select party, when Miss Maguire didn’t invite more persons to be prisint.

B. Sure we don’t know how many invitations she has sint out. Fashionable people don’t come very airly. We’ll have more byme-by. (_Bell rings._) They’re beginnin’ to arrive now.

K. Misther Dunn ye’ll oblige me by goin’ to the door, if ye plaze.

(_JAMES goes out, and soon returns L., with CORNY REILLY, ELLEN SWEENY and JULIA GRIFFIN. He conducts them to KATY._)

J. Miss Maguire, this is Miss Sweeny, Miss Griffin, and Misther Reilly.

CORNY (_bowing with many flourishes_). My respects to yez, Miss Maguire. (_The other two visitors bow, and KATY returns the salutations of all._)

J. Miss Maguire, won’t ye favor us with a little illegant music?

M. It’s little enough of that kind ye’ll get.

K. If ye’ll esquort me to the pianner, I’ll play pervidin’ yez will all sing.

A. (_who has just entered_). Av coorse we will.

M. I aint a-goin’ to sing anyway.

K. (_sarcastically_). Yer vice won’t be missed, Miss Finnegan.

J. Allow me to lade yez to the pianner.

(_KATY takes his arm and goes to the piano, L. C., where she seats herself._)

K. (_turning around_). What can ye sing, ladies?

J. You choose the song for us.

K. Well, thin, it’s a midley I’ll play, an’ then ye can sing what ye plaze.

(_She commences drumming on the piano, and her companions, grouped around her, sing, each one a different piece, a short one. Enter PAT., R., who dances round the stage till the close of the singing._)

P. (_going to KATY and speaking in a low tone, but loud enough for all to hear_). Say, Katy, I’ve been down-town, an’ got some ice-crame. It’s downstairs now. We’re going to have a big trate byme-by.

K. (_smiling graciously_). Is that so, Pat.?

P. Yis, an’ the things on the table looked so timptin’ that I stopped an’ refreshed mesilf wid a little cake an’ wine. (_Begins to sing some Irish air._)

J. Look here, Pat.; what did ye meddle with that wine for? Ye spalpeen, I b’lave ye’re dhrunk.

P. (_slyly_). Sure, that’s where ye’re wrong, Misther Dunn. I jist took a wee dthrop to keep my sperits up. (_Begins to dance._)

J. It’s more like ye’ve put all the sperits down yer throat, yer thafe of the world!

P. Owin’ to my partic’lar good nature, I shan’t notice that little insinivation o’ yours. But say, now, let’s have a dance. If you aint goin’ ter play, Katy, jest be my partner, will yer?

J. Miss Maguire’s engaged ter me.

K. Yis, I’m engaged to Misther Dunn.

P. Whew! That’s the way the wind blows, thin. Well _dunn_, Jimmy! (_All laugh._)

J. (_pushing PAT._). Jist be a little more respectful to your betters, ye blackguard! (_Turning to KATY politely_) Will you allow me, Miss Maguire? (_Offers his arm, which KATY takes, and they take their places for the dance._)

P. Say now, who’s goin’ to fiddle for us? Or is we goin’ ter dance widout any music?

C. Miss Sweeny plays on the pianner at our house.

K. Then perhaps Miss Sweeny will do us the favor ter play for us.

(_In imitation of JAMES’ example, PAT. immediately rushes up to ELLEN, saying with many flourishes:_)

P. Allow me, Miss Sweeny. (_She takes his arm and goes to piano and seats herself._)

(_PAT. goes to MARY, and offers his arm for the dance, but she turns disdainfully from him, and goes out with a lofty air. PAT. then goes to JULIA, who accepts him as a partner. CORNEY, at the same time, takes BRIDGET and ANN (one on either arm), and all have taken their places. At the sound of the piano, they break into an Irish jig of the wildest sort. PAT. cuts up the maddest capers. A bell rings outside, but in the uproar it is unheard by the dancers. A moment later, MISS EVELYN appears at the door, L. She stands for a moment, dumfounded at the scene before her. At first she is not seen by any of the company, but ELLEN, happening to look up, beholds her and clasps her hands in alarm. The dancers, not hearing the sound of the piano, look toward it to discover the cause. They observe the dismay pictured in ELLEN’S face, and, following the direction of her eyes, they behold MISS EVELYN. They stand with startled faces._)

MISS EVELYN (_sternly_). What does all this mean?

M. (_triumphantly_). It’s all Katy’s doin’s, miss.

K. (_Darting a withering glance at the speaker, and then turning to MISS E._). We were only indulgin’ in a little innocent amusement, ma’am. I hope you’re not offended.

MISS E. But who gave you leave to deck yourself in this manner?

K. Sure I was only airin’ the dress, ma’am, as it had hung so long in the closet.

MISS E. Well, I don’t approve of any such airs. Leave the room, every one of you! The idea of my drawing-room being the scene of a servants’ party! You will all receive your discharge to-morrow morning.

(_The servants leave the room, R., looking crestfallen enough—all but KATY, who sweeps out of the room with a lofty air, determined to keep up her character to the last._)

P. (_aside to ANN, who goes out last_). An’ aint we goin’ to have our trate then?

A. (_aside_). Whist! Yis. Say nothin’. We’re goin’ to have it right away. Miss Evelyn never comes down below at this time o’ night.

(_Exeunt._)

MISS E. (_seating herself C. in disgust_). Was there ever any annoyance equal to that of keeping servants? Mine are a constant source of trouble. I have threatened to discharge them all to-morrow morning. But what shall I gain by it? I shall have another set who will perhaps try my patience even more than these have done. Servants understand their importance, and realize their power over their employers. It is becoming a species of tyranny. If I could only do without them I most assuredly would do so. (_A shout of laughter is heard in the distance. MISS E. stands up._) What! haven’t they done yet? Probably they are gormandizing, downstairs, at my expense. (_To the audience—a little sarcastically:_) I have heard some persons wish for wealth, so that they could afford to keep servants to wait on them. They do not realize the emptiness of their desires. A person who has few wants, and can minister to them himself, is more independent than the wealthiest person living. Those who keep a multitude of servants are dependent on _their whims_, and should not be surprised at frequent outbursts of High Life Below Stairs.

(_Curtain falls._)

BOARDING ON A FARM.

CHARACTERS.

MRS. MONTGOMERY, A Lady who is seeking Country Board. MR. MONTGOMERY, her Husband. FLORENCE MALVINA, ⎫ Their Children. GEORGE ALEXANDER, ⎭ MRS. JONES, A Farmer’s Wife. JONATHAN, ⎫ Servants. PATTY, ⎭