Category: Humour

Samantha on Children's Rights

My son, Thomas Jefferson, and his wife, Maggie, have got a little daughter, it wuz very pleasin’ to Josiah and me, and weighed over nine pounds. It is now most ten months old, and is, with the exception of my other grandchildren, the most beautiful child that wuz ever seen in...

Chapters

1. CHAPTER II

My son, Thomas Jefferson, and his wife, Maggie, have got a little daughter, it wuz very pleasin’ to Josiah and me, and weighed over nine pounds. It is now most ten months old, a...

2. CHAPTER III

If there ever wuz a girl in the world that I loved, no kin to me, it wuz Marion Martin. She lived nigh enough so I knew her hull history from A to Z, specially Z. It wuzn’t the...

3. CHAPTER IV.

What Maggie said about her makin’ a change kinder staid with me. Great is the power of suggestion. She suggested it to me, and I passed on the influence to my pardner.

4. CHAPTER V

Josiah wuz in a hurry to git home, but I persuaded him to stop for a day at Dr. Phillip Rhode’s, who married she that wuz Dora Peak, daughter of my cousin on my own side.

5. CHAPTER VI

Young Dr. Phillip Rhodes wuz a prime favorite of mine, and had always been. He had as much goodness and common sense and smartness about him as any young man I ever set eyes on....

6. CHAPTER VII

For about two years there has been great doin’s in Hamen Smith’s family, owin’ to Tamer Ann’s wantin’ to make Anna marry a young old chap who come down from New York village to...

7. CHAPTER VIII

Well, to resoom backwards for a spell. Josiah and I wuzn’t goin’ to stay only two days and one night, but, good land! they wouldn’t hear a word to our goin’ so soon, so we staye...

8. CHAPTER IX

Well, after breakfast Tamer and I wuz in the settin’ room both on us sewin’, for I had took a fine shirt of Josiah’s to finish, and she wuz embroiderin’ some lace ruffles to tri...

9. CHAPTER X

She stayed here three days and four nights, while her Pa and Ma went to North Scriba to his folkses on a visit. Diphtheria wuz ragin’ there among the little children, and we non...

10. CHAPTER XI.

Well, the next mornin’ Josiah come upstairs where I wuz makin’ up the spare bed, I had had it open airin’ it, and sez he, comin’ into the room excited and agitated:

11. CHAPTER XII.

Accordin’ to promise Tamer Ann brung Jack to stay a few days with me while she went on to her Aunt Nancy John’s. Her Aunt Nancy don’t like children, bein’ nervous and highsteric...

12. CHAPTER XIII.

It wuzn’t long after this that Josiah had to go over to South Scriba to sell some spruce lumber, he wanted to dicker for some salted white fish, they ketch sights of white fish...

13. CHAPTER XIV.

I always did kinder like to have onexpected company, it seems as though I always have a better visit with ’em, and I felt as pleasant as the day, which wuz a beautiful one, when...

14. CHAPTER XV.

Tamer and Jack stayed all night, and the next day but one we wuz all to meet at Thomas Jefferson’s, and then she wuz goin’ home and leave Jack with me for a week or so. The pros...

15. CHAPTER XVI.

The next mornin’ wuz fair and pleasant, and we got a good, early start. We went with the democrat, and Jack wuz goin’ to set between us after we left Delight; we put in her litt...

16. CHAPTER XVII.

Josiah had to go to Jonesville that afternoon after necessaries, and I sot all alone in my cheerful kitchen almost lost in a train of pleasant thoughts, and some sort o’ pensive...

17. CHAPTER XVIII.

Well, Tamer and I had it all planned to go to Uncle Submit’s whilst Celestine wuz there with her little girl, but at the last minute a letter come from Tamer askin’ me if I woul...

18. CHAPTER XIX.

We had hard work to git through the gorgeous lookin’ crowd, every country and every nation wuz represented. Queens, flashin’ with jewels; flower girls, carryin’ baskets of flowe...

19. CHAPTER XX.

The time drawed near for me to go to Tamer’s and visit with Celestine, and I cooked up good vittles and sights of ’em, knowin’ that in my absence no paneky would soothe like tha...

20. CHAPTER XXI.

Though it is shootin’ ahead of the story and resoomin’ forward, yet I d’no but I may as well tell of Cicero’s adventures, and casualties now as any time, they have got to be tol...

21. CHAPTER XXII.

Well, Tom Willis kep’ doin’ better and better and wuz gittin’ a good salary, good enough, with what property he had, for him to marry on, and Anna kep’ on lovin’ him and refusin...

22. CHAPTER XXIII.

Things went on in their usual roteen in our home in Jonesville, Josiah good, over-good at times, anon puggicky and hard to git along with, softened into amiability agin by his o...

23. CHAPTER XXIV.

But to resoom backwards agin. Anna said her Ma had not only acted dretful cool and distant to her Pa ever since, but kep’ up a cool, icy demeanor towards everybody who pitied he...