Part 15

_Adul._ Tell us what to do.

_Avar._ I will--they come--we are caught.

_Adul._ Whither shall I run?

_Avar._ Now sing a song, Honesty!

_Adul._ I am past singing now.

_Avar._ Yes, one song, Honesty! Hay! hay! hay! hay! I will be merry while I may.

ACTUS QUINTI, SCENA NONA.

VERITY. JUSTICE. AVARICE. RESPUBLICA. ADULATION. MISERICORDIA. PEACE. PEOPLE. INSOLENCE. OPPRESSION.

_Ver._ Here they be, all four! this is a happy chance.

_Avar._ Take each man a lady, sirs! and let us go dance!

_Resp._ I left People here for a train, to hold them talk: Alas, that I could tell which way best hence to walk!

_Avar._ What be these fair ladies? and whither will they, trow?

_Just._ We arrest you, sirs! all four, as ye stand in a row; Not so hardy in your hearts, our arrest to gainsay.

_Avar._ Nay! we are content, if ye let us go our way.

_Just._ No, not a foot! we must first your reckoning take.

_Avar._ I ne'er bought nor sold with you, reckoning to make; Nor I know not who you be.

_Just._ Justice is my name.

_Avar._ Where is your dwelling?

_Just._ In heaven; and, thence I came.

_Avar._ Dwell ye in heaven and so mad to come hither? All our hucking here is how we may get thither!

_Just._ I bring heaven with me, and make it where I am.

_Avar._ Then I pray you let me be your prentice, Madame! I will be at your beck.

_Just._ Ye shall, ere ye depart.

_Avar._ I would learn how to make heaven, with all my heart. Well, as for Lady Misericordia, I remember I saw you with Respublica.

_Adul._ You, if you so please, may do much good in this land; Many, at this hour, do need your good helping hand.

_Avar._ And ye came down from heaven too, I judge?

_Miser._ Yea, sure!

_Avar._ Why, what folk are ye that cannot heaven endure? And what may I call you, lady?

_Pax._ My name is Peace.

_Avar._ Ye have long dwelt with us; we have been long in peace.

_Peace._ Call ye it peace, sirrah! when brother and brother Cannot be content to live one by another? When one for his house, for his land, yea, for his groat, Is ready to strive and pluck out another's throat? I will in all such things make perfect union.

_Avar._ Then, good-night! the lawyers gain, by Saint Tronnion! Westminster Hall might go play, if that came to pass. Faith! we must serve you with a supersedeas.

_Ver._ Well! leave vain prattling, and now come answer to me.

_Avar._ I must hear first what ye say, and who ye be.

_Ver._ I am dame Verity.

_Avar._ What? the daughter of Time?

_Ver._ Yea!

_Avar._ I know my master, your father, well afine. Welcome, fair lady! sweet lady, little lady, Plain lady, smooth lady, sometime spital lady; Lady Long-tongue, lady Tell-all, lady Make-bate: And, I beseech you, from whence are ye come of late?

_Ver._ I am sprung out of the earth.

_Avar._ What, ye do but jest!

_Ver._ The book sayeth: _Veritas de terra orta est_.

_Avar._ Happy is he which hath that garden plat, I trow! Out of which such fair blossoms do spring and grow; Yet this one thing, I say.

_Ver._ What?

_Avar._ Ye are friend to few, Pressed to open all things, and men's manner to show.

_Ver._ If ye be true and just, that is your benefit.

_Avar._ True or untrue, just or unjust, it is your spite; And glad ye are to take other folks in a trip. [Yes! ye do it no]w and then, your ownself, on the whip. Well, ye might be honest of your tongue, if you would.

_Ver._ If your acts were honest, ye did but as ye should.

_Avar._ Who chargeth me with the crime of any vice?

_Ver._ Thou callst thyself Policy, and art Avarice.

_Avar._ Nay, I defy your malice, I am Policy-- Ask of my fellows here! am not I Policy?

_Ver._ Ladies! will ye all see him openly tried?

_Just._ If he be an ill one, let him be descried.

_Ver._ What hast thou in thy bosom?

_Avar._ Nothing, I, truly!

_Ver._ Nothing truly got, say! show it forth openly.

_Avar._ What should I show forth?

_Ver._ That bag in thy bosom hid.

_Avar._ It lieth well, I thank you; as much as though I did.

_Ver._ Nay, come on! out with it!

_Avar._ Lo! here 'tis, for your fancy.

_Ver._ Give it me!

_Avar._ Yea, nay; I defy that Policy!

_Ver._ Open it!

_Avar._ Yea, that each body might be catching: Some's teeth, I think, water e'en since to be snatching.

_Ver._ We must needs see what it is.

_Avar._ 'Tis a bag of rye!

_Ver._ Rye, what rye?

_Avar._ A bag of rye [...]

_Ver._ ... such as men do eat?

_Avar._ A bag of rye flour, a great deal better than wheat.

_Ver._ Let us see what rye it is! pour it out in haste!

_Avar._ Yea, shall? I trow not! indeed, so might we make waste.

_Ver._ There is no remedy; pour it out in my lap!

_Avar._ Nay! if there be no choice, I will use mine own cap.

_Ver._ So! a bag of rye, quod thou?

_Avar._ Yea, so God me speed!

_Ver._ Thou sayest even truth; 'tis a bag of rye indeed: Usury, perjury, pitchery, patchery; Pilfery, bribery, snatchery, catchery; Flattery, robbery, cloutery, botchery; Trumpery, harlotry, misery, treachery!

_Avar._ There is too, an please you, a little sorcery, Witchery, baudery, and such other grossery.

_Ver._ And how gottst thou all this in thy possession?

_Avar._ Pardon me! and I will make my confession: The world is hard, and the bag is but very small; I got it where I could, to go on beg[ging] withal-- A plain true dealing man that loveth not to steal; And I durst not be bold to crave of commonweal.

_Ver._ Now, do off thy gown, and turn the inside outward!

_Aver._ Let me alone, and an angel for a reward!

_Ver._ Come, off at once! when? come off! no more gaudies [n]or japes.

_Avar._ Must I needs whip over the chain like Jack-a-napes?

_Resp._ Out! in the virtue of God! what do ye here see?

_Avar._ All this had been lost, Respublica, but for me!

_Resp._ O Lord! where hast thou dragged up all these purses?

_Ver._ Where he hath had for them many thousand curses.

_Resp._ Where hast thou gotten them? tell truth, and do not lie!

_Avar._ Where no honest man could have gotten them but I. In blind corners, where some would have hoarded them, Had not I take them with the manner and burdened them.

_Resp._ And whither was it thine intent to convey them now?

_Avar._ I hid them that I might bring them safely to you. I durst not bear them openly, to God I vow! I wis ye have heard me blame pickpurses or now-- And this is all yours.

_Ver._ It is hers, in very deed!

_Avar._ With sufferance I could get mo to help her need.

_Ver._ How say ye, Respublica! now to Policy?

_Resp._ I ne'er suspect him nor had him in jealousy.

_Ver._ In such like counterfeits shall all the rest appear. Sirs! do off your utmost robes, each one even here. Now, what these are, ye see plain demonstration.

_Resp._ Insolence, Oppression, Adulation! O Lord! how have I be used these five years past!

_People._ Nay, Is ne'er thought better of om, ich, by God's vast. Vey! madame, my lady! such strussioners as these Have oft made you believe the moon was a green cheese.

_Ver._ Now ye see what they are; the punishment of this Must be referred to the goddess Nemesis: She is the most high goddess of correction; Clear of conscience, and void of affection; She hath power from above, and is newly sent down To redress all outrages, in city and in town; She hath power from God all practice to repeal Which might bring annoyance to lady Commonweal; To her office belongeth the proud to overthrow, And such to restore as injury hath brought low; 'Tis her power to forbid and punish in all estates All presumptuous immoderate attemptates. Her cognisance, therefore, is a wheel and wings to fly, In token her rule extendeth far and nigh; A rudder, eke, she beareth in her other hand, As directri[c]e of all things in every land; Then pranketh she her elbows out, under her side, To keep back the heady, and to temper their pride. To her, therefore, dear sisters! we must now resort, That she may give sentence upon this naughty sort; She knoweth what is fittest for their correction; Nemesis must, therefore, herein give direction.

_Just._ Then, People! while we lady Nemesis do fet All these offenders in this custody we set; Them to apprehend and keep till we come again.

_People._ An ye give me tority, chill keep om, that is plain.

_Insol., Oppr._ Shall People keep us, of whom we have been lords?

_People._ Stand still, or by Jis! [chill] bind you vast with cords. Nay, sirs! ich ha' you now in my custodity.

_Avar._ Mass, I will be gone for my mine own commodity.

_People._ Zoft! whither wilt thou? wilt thou not be roiled? Stand still, skitbrained thief, or thy bones shall be coiled! Yond be they coming now, che war't that will tame ye. A, zee! art thou gone too? come back, and evil a thee!

ACTUS QUINTI, SCENA DE[CIMA].

NEMESIS. RESPUBLICA. MISERICORDIA. VERITAS. JUSTICE. PAX. PEOPLE. INSOLENCE. OPPRESSION. ADULATION. AVARICE.

_Nem._ Come forth, Respublica, our darling most dear!

_Resp._ At your word, most gracious lady! I am here.

_Nem._ Are these your trusty men that had you in government?

_People._ The skitb[r]ains nold not be roiled ne'er, since ye went.

_Nem._ People! why art thou bashful and standest so far? Be of good cheer now; and, I warrant thee, come near!

_People._ I will come no near: cha not be haled up with states, But I scannot be fichant enough amongst my [mates].

_Nem._ Come near, when I bid thee

_People._ Marry! but I ninnat; I namnot worthy to perk with you, no, I nam not.

_Nem._ Well, Respublica! are these your late governors, Whom ye took for faithful and trusty counsellors?

_Resp._ Yea, forsooth, Madame!

_Avar._ These three be, but I am none; For I was discharged nigh half-an-hour agone.

_Nem._ Come! first stand forth here, thou Adulation!

_Adul._ Speak a good word for me, lady Compassion!

_People._ Nay! she shall not need, I chill speak for thee myself-- Madame, take good heed! for this is a naughty elf.

_Adul._ Nay, Madame! the cause of all this was Avarice; He forged us new names, and did us all entice.

_Oppr._ We neither did nor could work, but by his advice.

_Adul._ Because I got no more, he chid me once or twice.

_Insol._ Madame! only Avarice made us all to fall.

_Avar._ Yea? Fall to preaching? Nay! then will I tell all. Madame! ere I had taught these merchants any while, They were cunninger than I, all men to beguile. And Verity saw mine were small purses and bags, Tottering loose about me, like wind-shaken rags. But he that should have bagged that Insolence did win, Must have made a poke to put five or six shires in; He must have made wide sacks for castles, towns, and woods: The canvas to make them of, were worth ten times my goods. Then Oppression here, to feather well his nest, Cared not, of their livelood whom he dispossest. Bishops, deans, provosts, the poor folk from the spital, Lands with church and chapel, all was for him too little. Poor I did not so; I scraped but little crumbs; And, here and there, with odd ends, patched up my sums. Flattery got his thrift by counterfeit honesty; Yet, by these ten bones! I bid him use modesty. Therefore, spare not him; he will ne'er come to good pass; But I may well be mended, by the Mary Mass!

_Miser._ Lady Nemesis! now have ye occasion And matter to show your commiseration. [It is much] more glory, and standeth with more skill, Lost sheep to recover, then the scabby to spill.

_Just._ But how shall this redress be well persecuted, If justice with mercy shall be executed? Straight Justice must such great enormities redress; Severity must put men in fear to transgress; Justice must give each man that he doth deserve.

_Miser._ If offenders were not, wherefore might mercy serve?

_Avar._ Stick hard to it, good, sweet lady Compassion! We are all else undone, by Cock's bitter passion!

_Miser._ Verity! how say you? have I not spoken well?

_Ver._ Mercy in one place with Justice sometime may dwell, And right well agree together--how say you, Peace?

_Pax._ Where all thing is well amended, I do increase.

_Nem._ Ladies, we have heard all your discreet advises; And each one shall have some part of your devises. Neither all nor none shall taste of severity But as they are now known through lady Verity; So shall they receive our mercy or our ire, As the wealth of Respublica shall best require. Now, Adulation! what sayeth you in this case?

_Adul._ Nought in mine excuse, but submit me to your grace. Only this: I promise, if I may Mercy find, Utterly for ever to change my wicked mind; I ne'er sought afore mine own private gain so much, But I will further Commonweal's ten times so much.

_Nem._ Well, thou mayest become a worthy subject, it is plain.

_Adul._ Else ye know at all times how to reach me again.

_Nem._ Thou mightest swerve of frailty, thou might'st do to please; Thou might'st do for fear, thou might'st do to live in ease; Well, upon thy promise, for once we pardon thee. Go, and see that from henceforth thou be perfect Honesty!

_Adul._ So long as shall please God to give me life and heale, I shall most duly serve God and the Commonweal. Now to thee, Avarice; have at thy petticoat!

_Nem._ Now the plague of commonweals, as all men do note: Come forth, Avarice! to spare thee will be no boot; Thou must be plucked up, e'en by the very root, Because thou scraped'st up whatever thou might'st get.

_Avar._ Indeed, I thank God there is no man in my debt!

_Nem._ And, because thou caught'st it by wrong contribution, Thou shalt first and foremost make restitution.

_Avar._ Let me then, with pardon, go hence about it lightly.

_Nem._ No! ye shall have help to see it done uprightly. People, take this fellow--

_Avar._ God save me from this plunge!

_Nem._ --that he may be pressed as men do press a sponge; That he may drop aught, t' every man his lot, To the utmost farthing that he hath falsely got.

_People._ An ye bid me, chill squeeze him as dry as a kyx.

_Avar._ Nay, the pash of God! I shall then die of the flix.

_Nem._ Nay! thou shalt deliver him to the head officer Which hath authority, justice to minister.

_People._ Chil 'liver him to the constable, and come again.

_Nem._ Now, Justice, for these two that do here remain: Because the fault of Insolence is heinous and great-- Lucifer's own fault t' aspire to the highest seat-- And because Oppression hath wronged men so sore That he spoiled innocents of all they had and more, People shall deliver them unto safe custody, Where they may no farther annoy anybody. When the time may serve t' examine and try their cause, Call them both before you, and judge them by the laws.

_People._ And shalche carry away these same two men also?

_Nem._ Yea; go deliver them to an officer, go! Now, darling Respublica! ye are in th' old good estate; And they taken away that spoiled you of late. Now cleave to these ladies, from heaven to you direct; They from all corruption will you safe protect. Well, I must go hence to another count[r]y now, That hath of redress the like case that was in you. I leave you for this time, immortal thanks to give To God, and your Sovereign, which do you thus relieve.

_Resp._ Thanks be to Thee, O Lord! which hast this world wrought, And hast me to this state from utter ruin brought.

_Pax._ Now let us all together, both with heart and voice, In God and in Queen Mary most joyfully rejoice.

_Ver._ Praying that her reign, most graciously begun, [May] long years endure, as hitherto it hath done.

_Just._ Pray we for her Council, to have long life and health, Their sovereign to serve.

_Pax._ And to maintain Commonwealth.

_Omnes._ Amen!

[_Cantant et exeant_.

FINIS.

AN INTERLUDE OF

WEALTH AND HEALTH

VERY MERRY AND FULL OF PASTIME, NEWLY AT THIS TIME IMPRINTED

#The Names of the Players:#

WEALTH HEALTH LIBERTY ILL-WILL SHREWD WIT HANCE REMEDY

Four may easily play this Play

* * * * *

EXTRACT FROM THE STAT. REG. 1557 [ARBER I. 75]

To master John wally these bokes Called _Welth and_ _helthe / the treatise of the ffrere and the boye / stans puer_ _ad mensam_ another of _youghte charyte and humylyte_ an _a b c for cheldren_ in englesshe _with syllabes_ also a boke called _an hundreth mery tayles_.... ij^s

[WEALTH AND HEALTH.]

_A2,r. Here entereth_ WEALTH _and_ HEALTH _singing together a ballat of two parts, and after speaketh_ WEALTH.

_Wealth._ Why is there no courtesy now I am come? I trow that all the people be dumb; Or else, so God help me and halidom! They were almost asleep. No words I heard, nor yet no talking; No instrument went, nor ballats singing; What ails you all, thus to sit dreaming? Of whom take ye care? Of my coming ye may be glad; Therefore, I pray you be not sad, For all your desire shall be had: I can amend your cheer. By God! I think ye have forgotten me. I am Wealth of this realm; look upon me! For I am to every man loving and friendly: For Wealth hath no peer.

_Health._ Brother Wealth! have ye not yet done? Ye praise yourself above the moon. Every man may perceive thereby, soon, That you lack discretion.

_Wealth._ Wherefore? by God! I cannot say too much. I am so wealthy of substance and rich; In all the world where is one such As I am of comparison?

_Health._ Wealth is good, I cannot denay; Yet praise yourself too much ye may; For wealth, oftentimes, doth decay: And wealth is nothing sure.

_Wealth._ Wealth hath been ever in this country; A2,_v._ And here I purpose still for to be; For this is the land most meet for me, And here I will endure.

_Health._ Therein ye speak full lovingly; For, in this realm, wealth should be; Yet, no displeasure, I pray you heartily! But in the way of communication, And for pastime, I would speak some ways, Of no comparison, nor to you no dispraise-- I do not intend that manner always-- But for a recreation.

_Wealth._ Brother! whatsoever ye say to me I will hear you patiently. I am content, and I thank you heartily; Begin, and say your pleasure.

_Health._ I thank you heartily; then will I Somewhat unto my purpose apply: Though Wealth be praised marvellously, Yet to mine understanding Wealth is mutable, and that in shame; And Wealth is haughty and proud of name; Wealth is cruel and in great blame; For Wealth is ever wavering.

_Wealth._ To whom have I done any harm--can ye say? Ye slander me now; yet I trust I may Answer for myself in every manner way; Ye will not deny that?

_Health._ God forbid but ye should do so! And ye may do it whether I will or no. In like wise I must answer you, also, When ye say not true. Though I be but to you a poor man, A3,_r._ Yet Health I hight; the same I am: That is desired universally than-- Some calls me as good as you!

_Wealth._ As I? marry! there, indeed, ye do compare; Such words might bring you soon in care. Lewd person! thou art not ware Of what substance I am.

_Health._ Yes! I can tell what you are; be not displeased. Wealth is of great substance; that cannot be denied. Yet, show your commodities, and ye shall be answered: I promise you wealth is fugitive.

_Wealth._ What sayst thou? am I a tagetive? I was never so taken up in my life, Nor called unsure--well! I will make no strife. Yet, whereas thou dost say That I should show my commodities always, The best for myself, whereof I ask praise, If I should stand here all my life days Yet I could not say. Nor half the benefits that cometh of me, It cannot be told nor recited shortly. Wealth is the flower of all thing earthly-- That you cannot deny. First, God save our sovereign lady, the Queen; With all the Council, and all that with them been. Am not I, Wealth, with them ever at ene? Who should be there but I? Men of the law, and jolly rich merchants There be, wealthy both; of goods and lands, Without comparison, is in their hands: I, Wealth, have all treasure.

_Health._ O good sir! of whom cometh all this? A3,_v._ Of God only: to you no thank, I wis. And yet man's wealth stands not all in riches: I dare say that boldly. When a man hath a competent living, With the grace of God that passeth all thing, Love of his neighbour, and good reporting: Then is he wealthy. Wealth of goods is but a fame; He is wealthy that hath a good name; Every wise man will covet the same: For other wealth I not rech. If a man have never so much good name Every wise man will covet the same; If his dispositions be nought and wood, Then he is but a wretch.

_Wealth._ Nay! thou art a wretch, and a fool unwise, Wealth of riches thus to despise; Dost thou not see all the world arise By goods and substance? He that hath plenty of silver and gold May have all thing, whatsoever he would. When can Wealth lack, seeing all thing is sold, And Wealth is of assurance?

_Health._ I deny that; your saying is nought: Grace, heaven, nor cunning cannot be bought Without great pain, and good deeds wrought; Else man cannot them have.

_Wealth._ Stop thereat, and hold thy peace! May not men buy heaven with richesse, As to build churches and make by-ways? Such deeds man's soul doth save.

_Health._ Yea! but yet ye must mark one thing, A4,_r._ If these goods came with wrong-doing Shall ye have heaven for so spending, Or yet any meed? Nay, nay! except that man himself do meek, And make resistance the right honour to seek, Else all such good deeds is not worth a leek. Wealth! hereof take heed!

_Wealth._ Why thinkest thou that all men which hath wealth Getteth their goods with bribery and stealth? Thy report is nought; therefore, Health, I counsel thee to say the best.

_Health._ So I will; but yet, I must say true. And now a little more I will say to you: Much sorrow and care wealth doth brew; He is seldom in rest. When a man is a little hite and wealthy, And hath in his chest treasures plenty, Then will he wrangle, and do shrewdly By his power and might. With his neighbours he will go to law; And a-wreak his malice for value of straw: Wealth is fickle and out of awe, Wilful in wrong or right.