Chapter 1

_Daniel Mérital_. My father is a wonderful man. Leader of the Social Party in the Chamber of Deputies, noted among his colleagues for his absolute integrity, supported by the millionaire newspaper proprietor, Frépeau, whose motives, between ourselves, are not altogether above-- Oh, are you there, Father? I didn't see you. I'm just off to play tennis. [_Exit_.

_Enter_ Renée de Rould.

_Renée_. Mr. Mérital, may I speak to you a moment?

_Georges Alexandre Mérital (with, characteristic suavity_). Certainly.

_Renée_, I love you. Will you marry me?

_Mérital (surprised_). Well, really--this is--I--you--we--er, he, she, they--Frankly, you embarrass me. (_Apologetically_) This is my embarrassed face.

_Renée_. But I thought you loved me. Don't you?

_Mérital_. No. That is to say, yes. Or rather--

_Renée (tearfully_). I w-wish you could make it plainer whether you d-do love me and are pretending you don't, or you d-don't love me and are pretending you do. It's v-very unsettling for a young girl not to know.

_Sir GEORGES ALEXANDRE (surprised and a little hurt_). Can't you tell from my face?

_Miss MARTHA HEDMAN_. This is my first appearance in England, Sir GEORGES.

_Sir GEORGES_. True. I was forgetting. Well, when you have been with us a little longer, you will know that this is my face when I adore anyone very much, but, owing to an unfortunate episode in my past life, am forced to hide my love.

_Renée (alarmed_). Your past _wife_ isn't alive somewhere?

_Mérital_. Oh no, not that sort of thing at all. (_Embracing her carefully_.) I will marry you, Renée, but run along now because my friend Frépeau is coming, and he probably wants to talk business. [_Exit_ Renée.

_Enter_ Frépeau.

_Frépeau (excitedly_). Mérital, you are in danger. A scandalous libel is being circulated about you.

_Mérital (calmly_). Pooh! Faugh!

_Frépeau_. It is said that thirty years ago (Alexandre's _nose twitches_), when you were in a solicitor's office (Alexandre's _jaw drops_), you stole ninepence from the stamp drawer (Alexandre's _eyeballs roll_). Of course it is a lie?

_Mérital (with a great effort obtaining command of his features again_). Of course.

CURTAIN.