Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 100, May 23, 1891

Chapter 1

Chapter 1664 wordsPublic domain

_At WERLE's house. In front a richly-upholstered study. (R.) a green-baize door leading to WERLE's office. At back, open folding doors, revealing an elegant dining-room, in which a brilliant Norwegian dinner-party is going on. Hired Waiters in profusion. A glass is tapped with a knife. Shouts of "Bravo!" Old Mr. WERLE is heard making a long speech, proposing--according to the custom of Norwegian society on such occasions--the health of his Housekeeper, Mrs. SÖRBY. Presently several short-sighted, flabby, and thin-haired Chamberlains, enter from the dining-room, with HIALMAR EKDAL, who writhes shyly under their remarks._

_A Chamberlain_. As we are the sole surviving specimens of Norwegian nobility, suppose we sustain our reputation as aristocratic sparklers by enlarging upon the enormous amount we have eaten, and chaffing HIALMAR EKDAL, the friend of our host's son, for being a professional Photographer?

_The other Chamberlains_. Bravo! We will.

[_They do; delight of HIALMAR. Old WERLE comes in, leaning on his Housekeeper's arm, followed by his son, GREGERS WERLE._

_Old Werle_ (_dejectedly_). Thirteen at table! (_To_ GREGERS, _with a meaning glance at_ HIALMAR.) This is the result of inviting an old College friend who has turned Photographer! Wasting vintage wines on _him_, indeed!

[_He passes on gloomily._

_Hialmar_ (_to Gregers_). I am almost sorry I came. Your old min is _not_ friendly. Yet he set me up as a Photographer fifteen years ago. _Now_ he takes me down! But for him, I should never have married GINA, who, you may remember, was a servant in your family once.

_Gregers_. What? my old College friend married fifteen years ago--and to our GINA, of all people! If I had not been up at the works all these years, I suppose I should have heard something of such an event. But my father never mentioned it. Odd!

[_He ponders; Old EKDAL comes out through the green-baize door, bowing, and begging pardon, carrying copying work. Old WERLE says "Ugh" and "Puh" involuntarily. HIALMAR shrinks back, and looks another way. A Chamberlain asks him pleasantly if he knows that old man._

_Hialmar_. I--oh no. Not in the least. No relation!

_Gregers_ (_shocked_). What, HIALMAR, you, with your great soul, deny your own father!

_Hialmar_ (_vehemently_). Of course--what else _can_ a Photographer do with a disreputable old parent, who has been in a Penitentiary for making a fraudulent map? I shall leave this splendid banquet. The Chamberlains are not kind to me, and I feel the crushing hand of fate on my head! [_Goes out hastily, feeling it._

_Mrs. Sörby_ (_archly_). Any Nobleman here say "Cold Punch"?

[_Every Nobleman says "Cold Punch," and follows her out in search of it with enthusiasm. GREGERS approaches his father, who wishes he would go._

_Gregers_. Father, a word with you in private. I loathe you. I am nothing if not candid. Old EKDAL was your partner once, and it's my firm belief you deserved a prison quite as much as he did. However, you surely need not have married our GINA to my old friend HIALMAR. You know very well she was no better than she should have been!

_Old Werle_. True--but then no more is Mrs. SÖRBY. And _I_ am going to marry _her_--if you have no objection, that is.

_Gregers_. None in the world! How can I object to a stepmother who is playing Blind Man's Buff at the present moment with the Norwegian nobility? I am not so overstrained as all that. But really I can_not_ allow my old friend HIALMAR, with his great, confiding, childlike mind, to remain in contented ignorance of GINA's past. No, I see my mission in life at last! I shall take my hat, and inform him that his home is built upon a lie. He will be _so_ much obliged to me! [_Takes his hat, and goes out._

_Old Werle_. Ha!--I am a wealthy merchant, of dubious morals, and I am about to marry my housekeeper, who is on intimate terms with the Norwegian aristocracy. I have a son who loathes me, and who is either an Ibsenian satire on the Master's own ideals, or else an utterly impossible prig--I don't know or care which. Altogether, I flatter myself my household affords an accurate and realistic picture of Scandinavian Society!