Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 100, February 28, 1891

Chapter 1

Chapter 1216 wordsPublic domain

LIEUTENANT PORTHOS, Captain ATHOS, and Major ARAMIS were delighted with the progress discernible in every detail of the battalion to which it was their honour to belong. Not a man that did not appear on parade conscious of the fact that he had made himself proficient--the privates were contented, the non-commissioned officers happy. It was, indeed, a model Regiment. On the occasion of their inspection by Colonel D'ARTAGNAN, a man marched from the ranks, and demanded a hearing.

"And what do _you_ want?" asked the inspecting officer.

"We wish the unjust to be made just," returned the discontented one. "We ask for a reform."

PORTHOS, ATHOS, and ARAMIS would have protested, but Colonel D'ARTAGNAN motioned them to be silent. "I am here," he murmured, "to listen to complaints. I must listen to his."

"Sir," said the complainant, "we have admirable officers--the Lieutenant, the Captain, and the Major. They are always at work."

"Yes," returned Colonel D'ARTAGNAN; "and so are you."

"But we have merely to obey orders, and not to command. We feel that although we pay for everything connected with the battalion, we should do something more. We ought to subscribe a sum to pay our excellent officers for commanding us!"

And PORTHOS, ATHOS, and ARAMIS refused the suggestion, to the great disappointment of their subordinates.