Chapter 4

_Spragge's Canyon_ (SMITH, ELDER), takes its title, as you might guess, from the canyon where the _Spragges_ lived. It was a delightful spot, a kind of earthly paradise (snakes included), and the _Spragge_ family had made it all themselves out of unclaimed land on the Californian coast. Wherefore the _Spragges_ loved it with a love only equalled perhaps by the same emotion in the breast of Mr. H. A. VACHELL, who has written a book about it. The _Spragges_ of the tale are _Mrs. Spragge_, widow of the pioneer, and her son _George_. With them on the ranch lived also a cousin, _Samantha_, a big-built capable young woman, destined by Providence and _Mrs. Spragge_ to be the helpmate of _George_. But _George_, though he was strong and handsome and a perfect marvel with rattlesnakes (which he collected as a subsidiary source of income), was also a bit of a fool; and when, on one of his rare townward excursions, he got talking to _Hazel Goodrich_ in a street car, her pale attractiveness and general lure proved too much for him. Accordingly _Hazel_ was asked down to the ranch on a visit (I am taking it on trust that Mr. VACHELL knows the Californian etiquette in these matters) and has the time of her life, flirting with the love-lorn _George_, impressing his mother, and generally scoring off poor _Samantha_. At least so she thought. Really, however, _Mrs. Spragge_ had taken _Hazel's_ measure in one, and was all the time quietly fighting her visitor for her son's future. This fight, and the character of the mother who makes it, are the best things in the book. I shall not tell you who wins. Personally I had expected a comedy climax, and was unprepared for creeps. But _George_, I may remind you, collected snakes. A good and virile tale.

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Sir MELVILLE MACNAGHTEN hopes, in his Introduction to _Days of my Years_ (Arnold), that his reminiscences "may be found of some interest to a patient reader"; and, when one considers that _Sir Melville_ spent twenty-four years at Scotland Yard, many of them as chief of the Criminal Investigation Department, he can hardly be accused of undue optimism. Speaking as one of his readers, I found no difficulty at all in being patient. I have always had a weakness for official detectives, and have resented the term "Scotland Yard bungler" almost as if it were a personal affront; and now I feel that my resentment is justified. Scotland Yard does not bungle; and the advice I shall give for the future to any eager-eyed, enthusiastic young murderer burning to embark on his professional career is, don't practise in London. I would not lightly steal a penny toy in the Metropolitan area. There are two hundred and seventy-nine pages in this story of crime, as seen by the man at the very centre of things, and nearly every one of them is packed with matter of absorbing interest. Consider the titles of the chapters: "Bombs and their Makers"; "Motiveless Murders"; "Half-a-day with the Blood-hounds." This, I submit, is the stuff; this, I contend, is the sort of thing you were looking for. There is something so human and simple in Sir MELVILLE'S method of narration that it is with an effort that one realises what an important person he really was, and what extraordinary ability he must have had to win and hold his high position. Even when he disparages blood-hounds I reluctantly submit to his superior knowledge and abandon one of my most cherished illusions. I hate to do it, but if he says that a blood-hound is no more use in tracking criminals than a Shetland pony would be, I must try to believe him.

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Illustration: THE COMPLETE SALESMAN.

_Lady_ (_rather difficult to please_). "I LIKE THIS ONE, BUT--I SEE IT'S PRINTED IN GERMANY."

_Salesman._ "WELL, IF YOU LIKE IT, MADAM, I WOULDN'T TAKE TOO MUCH NOTICE OF THAT STATEMENT. IT'S PROBABLY ONLY ANOTHER GERMAN LIE!"

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Revenge.

"After Herr Von Holman Bethwig's wild speech in the German Reichstag the Government might change their minds."

_Cork Constitution._

It isn't much one can do to the GERMAN CHANCELLOR just now, but these misprints of his name always annoy him, and every little helps.

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