Part 3

"I'm getting up in years now, TOBY," said THE MARKISS, "and I've had pretty long experience in making up Ministries. But I assure you I've been staggered during last week, including in special degree the last hour. The more offices assigned, the narrower becomes the basis of operation, and the more desperate the rush of the attacking party. You'd be surprised if you saw the list of men who have asked me for something. As a rule they don't put it in that general way. They know precisely what they want, and are not bashful in giving it a name, though they usually end up by saying that if this particular post is disposed of, anything else will do. In fact, like the cabman and the coy fare, they leave it to me. I am, as you know, of placid temperament, inclined to take genial views of my fellow-man. But I declare, if the process of forming a Ministry under my direction were extended beyond a fortnight, I should become a confirmed cynic."

_Business done._--Parties change sides.

_Tuesday._--"_Quel jour pour le bon Joé!_" said my Friend, dropping with easy grace into the French of Alderney-atte-Sark.

House full, considering the nearness of Dissolution. Members anxious above all things to meet their constituents. Grudge every hour that holds them from their embrace. Still, it is well upon occasion to practise self-denial. Ten days or even a fortnight with constituents during progress of contest inevitable. Just as well not to anticipate. So House crowded to see PRINCE ARTHUR return. Slight flush on his cheek as with swinging stride he comes to take up sceptre PEEL once held, that DIZZY deftly wielded, that GLADSTONE of late laid down. After him, second only to him, JOSEPH--JOSEPH in his very best summer suit, appropriate to occasion when sun shines most brightly. Then JOKIM, who has descended to frivolity of white waistcoat, which casts ghastly pallor over festive scene. Last of all, type in these days of stern, unbending Toryism, MICHAEL HICKS-BEACH.

"BEACH," said SARK, coming back to the English tongue, "has never either manoeuvred or wobbled. He is of the very flower of English political squirearchy. He has principles and convictions, and he sticks to them. So, when a Conservative Ministry arrives, he walks in last, and, on the Treasury Bench, takes any seat others may not have appropriated. Consider these things, TOBY, my boy. If you're bringing up any pups to a political career, the study may be useful to you and them." PRIVATE HANBURY got his stripes. After pegging away for years at Treasury, PRINCE ARTHUR now put him on to repel attacks. Will do it well too. An admirable appointment. Sad thing about it is, that it breaks up a cherished companionship; parts friends by the height and width and back of Treasury Bench.

_Business done._--Ministers sworn in.

_Thursday._--Notable change come over BOLTONPARTY in the last few days. Unmistakable Retreat-from-Moscow look about him. When Liberal Government went out and JOSEPH handed THE MARKISS to the front, BOLTONPARTY beamed with large content. The Sun of Austerlitz shone once more.

"JOSEPH," he said, folding his arms in historic fashion, letting his massive chin rest on his manly chest, what time his noble brow shone with the radiance of mighty thoughts, "JOSEPH will never forget his early friend and ally. It's not as if at the last General Election I stood under his flag, won a seat, and laid it at his feet. I fought North St. Pancras as a Home-Ruler, captured it, and before new Parliament was many months old, went over to other side, making early rift in lute of GLADSTONE'S majority. Some men in such circumstances would have gone back to their constituency and said, 'Dear boys, there's a mistake somewhere. You elected me on a particular understanding. Since then I have taken another view of the situation and of my duty. So I come back, return the trust you placed in my hand, and give you opportunity of electing me again, or choosing another man.' That might have led to inconvenience. Wouldn't run any risk; so kept my seat, and voted steadily with JOSEPH. Suppose they won't put me in the Cabinet right off? But I shall have choice of first-class Under-Secretaryship. Shall it be War, Navy, or Home Department? Any one excellent; but obviously I must go to the War Office. Don't know whether there's any particular uniform for Financial Secretary. If not, could soon knock one up from old portrait of the Emperor."

Day after day BOLTONPARTY stayed at home, expecting every hour to be sent for. Nothing came till Wednesday morning's papers arrived, with, the news that son AUSTEN was Secretary to the Admiralty, JESSE COLLINGS was installed at the Home Office, and POWELL WILLIAMS--who never set a squadron in the field, and didn't in any respect resemble the Emperor NAPOLEON--was Financial Secretary to the War Office! "That's bad enough, TOBY," said BOLTONPARTY, filing away an iron tear that coursed down his steel-grey cheek. "But there's worse behind. What do you think JOSEPH did when he heard I wasn't all together pleased? He offered me a statue! Said he'd no doubt AKERS-DOUGLAS could pick up on reasonable terms an old statue of NAPOLEON; with a little touching up it would serve, and there was a place ready on the site proposed for CROMWELL'S. There was, he said, well-known picture of NAPOLEON Crossing the Alps. Why shouldn't there be a statue of BOLTONPARTY Crossing Marylebone Road, North Pancras? This is man's gratitude! I've been cruelly Elba'd on one side, and nothing remains for me now but St. Helena."

_Business done._--All.

_Saturday._--Prorogation to-day, with usual imposing ceremony. On Monday, Dissolution. Off to the country. Of course no one opposes me in Barks. But must do the civil thing by my constituents.