SCENE I.--_Library in Latterday Hall_, Sir LYON TAYMER'S _Country

House_. Sir LYON TAYMER _discovered fuming by the mantelpiece, while his_ Secretary _is glancing over some correspondence_.

_Sir Lyon_ (_irritably_). Here--I suppose you will have to answer this.

_Secretary._ What is that, Sir LYON?

_Sir Lyon._ You know how anxious I am that my New Year's party should be a success. A whole heap of celebrities are coming, and, notwithstanding the immense expense, I engaged a party of Ghosts to amuse them. Now I have just had a telepathic communication from these Shadows of Shades--(that's all they are--only Ghosts of departed heroes and heroines in fiction)--asking whether they're to be treated on an equality with the other guests, or as mere entertainers! Did you ever hear of such impertinence! The spokesman--I should say, perhaps, the Spooksman--is, of all people in the other world, the VICAR OF WAKEFIELD. A clergyman too! It's quite inconsistent; and so snobbish!

_Secretary._ Dear Sir LYON, excuse me, but it's perfectly natural that Ghosts should be a little sensitive on the social question. Remember, for years they were ignored, or looked upon as mountebanks. It is really only of late that there has been all this excitement about them, so it is not surprising they are anxious to be taken seriously.

_Sir Lyon._ Well, I suppose I am old-fashioned, but it seems to me quite ridiculous. These infernal Ghosts give themselves as many airs as though they were--the Blue Hungarians, at least.

_Secretary._ Ah, from a band we might expect airs. But I should advise you very strongly, Sir _Lyon_, to treat them as friends. You _must_ be up to date.

_Sir Lyon_ (_with disgust_). Allow them to dine--perhaps to _dance_--with my guests?

_Secretary_ (_with calmness_). Certainly they will have to dine; and, as to dancing, of course they _must_, if they're received on an equal _footing_.

[_Smiles to himself at his joke._

_Sir Lyon._ Oh--well--I suppose I must give in. Let them know at once, and for heaven's sake mind they're punctual.

[_Scene closes as the Secretary hastily seizes a slate, and automatically writes to the Ghosts a very cordial and courteously-worded invitation._