Chapter 3

"Do you know, TOBY, what this reminds me of?" said Earl SPENCER, looking down on turbulent scene from Peers' Gallery. "Carries me back to boyhood's days, and what used to happen when, in temporary absence of head-master, French usher took charge of the school."

J. G. LAWSON, on spending time in Library, looking up native name for proposed Legislative Assembly in Dublin. Found what it used to be called when BRIAN was King; written name down, tries to pronounce it. TIM HEALY says, as far as he can make out, LAWSON is speaking Welsh; it is suggested that Chairman shall put Question. MELLOR says he's quite enough to do to put Amendments in English; declines to attempt the Irish. LAWSON withdraws, using awful language, which he insists is Irish. It sounds even worse.

_Business done._--Blusterous.

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_Saturday Morning._--Another afternoon in Committee on Home-Rule Bill. Not so lively as yesterday, but equal amount of business not done, which, after all is the thing. House fairly full; gunpowder lying about in all directions, as shown by occasional flash; and one regular explosion. Went off to Library; sat in quiet corner with PRINCE ARTHUR'S last book in hand. Fancy I must have fallen asleep; found tall figure sitting next to me; drowsily recognised RAIKES. Couldn't be RAIKES, you know; long ago gone to another place. Yet figure unmistakeable, and voice well remembered. Seem to have been asking him question.

"What do I think about new Chairman?" he was saying. "Well, of course, that is a delicate question to put to me; was Chairman myself for many sessions; know every thorn in the cushion of the seat. It is, I should say, the most difficult post in House; far more so than SPEAKER'S. SPEAKER is robed about with authority that does not pertain to Chairman. Observations which, addressed to SPEAKER, would be flat blasphemy, are, when flung at Chairman of Ways and Means, merely choleric words. Apart from that, position is, through long stretches of sitting, more arduous. When full-dress debate going on, SPEAKER of judgment and experience can go easy; may even, upon occasion, strategically doze. One did in times not so long ago, and was caught _flagrante asleepoh_. MACKWORTH PRAED was Member of the House then; made little speech in verse on incident. You remember it?

Sleep, Mr. SPEAKER; it's surely fair, If you don't in your bed, that you should in your Chair; Longer and longer still they grow, Tory and Radical, Aye and No Talking by night, and talking by day. Sleep, Mr. SPEAKER; sleep, sleep, while you may.

"Chairman must be on alert every moment in Committee. Rule under his jurisdiction is conversation as opposed to speech-making when SPEAKER in Chair. Any moment out of depths of dulness may suddenly rise a whirlwind, which he is expected forthwith to ride. Especially in connection with Bill like this now before Committee, Chairman is in state of tension from time he takes Chair till he leaves. Don't forget all this when you criticise MELLOR, still new to place. He's a good fellow, and a shrewd one; but has, among other difficulties, to fight against proneness to good-nature. Good-nature out of place in the Chair. COURTNEY knew that, and successfully overcame his natural tendencies. MELLOR too anxious to oblige. Must get over that. Above all, should never explain. Suddenly called upon for decision on knotty point, must needs make mistake sometimes. If he does, unless it be very serious, _he should stick to it_. For Chairman of Committees, better to be in the wrong and uphold authority of Chair, than to wriggle into the right at its expense. MELLOR should be more monosyllabic in his style, more ruthless in his dealing with disorderly interruption, more wary about putting his foot down, but, being planted, it should be immovable. It would make his fortune if he could only name CHAMBERLAIN. That would be difficult, I know, for JOEY C. is sly, dev'lish sly. He should begin with JEMMY LOWTHER, who gives plenty of chances. Thence he might work upwards. Is that a bell ringing? Yes. Must be off, or I'll get shut out. We've lately adopted the Early Closing Movement."

Certainly bell was ringing; it was for Division on Clause I. Still fact seems to run on all fours with what I remember RAIKES talking of just now. Yet, again, when one comes to think of it, can a bell run on all fours? Everything very strange. Shall go and vote.

_Business done._--Clause I. agreed to.

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TO THE WOOLSACK.

Sincere congratulations for Our conscience-keeping Chancellor. Whom lawyers know as HERSCHELL, C. Is now Lord HERSCHELL, G.C.B.

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AN ADDITION TO THE CALENDAR.--Sir SOMERS VINE, in recognition of his services in connection with the Imperial Institute, has been appointed a Companion of St. Michael and St. George. And why not? He will be found excellent company.

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Transcriber's Note:

Missing and illegible/damaged punctuation has been repaired.

Page 240: 'dulness' is correct--

from Oxford Online Dictionary:

dull ... -- DERIVATIVES dullness (also dulness).