Part 15
Don’t mind what the “other fellow” says, or thinks, in these matters that concern only yourself and those nearest and dearest. Live so as to make the very most and highest of the life God has given you,—and let the tongues wag as they will.
Why bless you, if folks couldn’t talk they would die—some of them. Let them talk and let yourself be free from care concerning what they say,—if you know you are acting from principle. Tastes differ. Yours is as apt to be right as your neighbor’s. Live your own life—only so it be a brave, true, sensible one—and let the other fellow live his.
DO NOT SPEAK EVIL OF ANY ONE
When you speak evil of another you assume the position of his judge and sentence him to punishment without a hearing.
“Judge not lest ye be judged.” That is the inhibition, which is a command inasmuch as it contains a threat of punishment.
When you speak evil of a man, you injure him if what you speak of him is not true and you make yourself a spreader of falsehood.
You also injure his reputation which is not in your keeping but is his property. You steal something from him that is his own and to which he has a right.
You blast a reputation heedlessly and without its being of any value to you. You shut it out for life from all that it holds dear and valuable. For what? Perhaps to gratify your lust for gossip.
You will not get off so easily as you think by ruining or attempting to ruin another’s reputation. You weaken yourself. The man you malign has friends that will stand by him, and they will become your enemies, not only in business but socially, and you will soon find yourself ostracized from respectable people and sent down to associate with other liars like yourself.
Even if what you say should prove to be true, who constituted you the judge? As already said, you must not judge.
One way of hurting a man is to misinterpret his acts. How do you know what a man’s motives are in any case? Every man looks into a mirror and sees himself, whence he interprets according to his own motives under the same circumstances. As it is commonly put: “A man generally judges another from himself.”
It is an unwise habit to fall into, and should be avoided lest others see us as we see others.
DO NOT NEGLECT YOUR PARENTS OR YOUR FAMILY
Every man is judged by his home life.
What kind of a son are you? In answering this question which will be asked to determine your character, the only answer possible to insure favorable consideration is “a good son.”
The home life of the nation and of the race is vital. If you are a home preserver or a home builder, your station in life is assured.
To sum up the requirements you should stand upon the platform open to the eyes of all men as a good son, faithful brother, kind father, helpful friend, and a good citizen. It is not difficult. Such virtues come to be a habit if practiced faithfully.
It is easier to be all these than to be vicious, and wrong with your parents, family, and relatives.
“Honor thy father and thy mother that the days may be long in the land which I will give thee.”
Something of a promise, is it not? It is a promise that has been strictly kept since the world began.
Your mother suffered for you; your father struggled for you, and you can not repay them with ingratitude. You may be higher than they, better educated, more of a social ornament, but you are theirs, and only the vain, foolish and wicked would neglect them.
It does not pay to treat them with contumely and scorn because they do not make the same fine appearance you do. There is no man or woman on this earth of higher social value to you than your parents.
If you are a man of family, remember that you are building up a posterity. You have fulfilled a noble mission, the greatest on earth. They owe you something, but the indebtedness is mutual, you owe them much.
_Do Not Drink Alcohol Or Form Other Bad Habits_
Drink is the curse of the age, and it has been truly said of it “A man is a fool who will put that in his mouth which will steal his brains.”
The habit of drinking intoxicating liquors is not a mere personal vice, it is public and affects every person belonging to or connected with you.
Looked at from a business standpoint, it is a destroyer of opportunity, and undermines the most brilliant prospects in life. It leads to moral and physical death.
If you hope to win you must not drink intoxicating liquors, it matters not whether you can stand them or not. They will get you finally, besides that, nobody wants a man who drinks.
Drink brings on other habits that are destructive of character and opportunity. A man who gambles will drink. Why? Because he knows he is doing something he should not do, and the drink hardens his conscience. The hardening process continues and he forms all sorts of bad habits. The more he forms the more reckless he becomes, then it is a case of “Good night” to everything decent and noble, or worth having.
There are few cures to bad habits. They become diseases in the course of time, and fatal diseases, besides encouraging other diseases by reducing the resisting power of the body.
There is a preventive to all bad habits, however, and only one—never take your first drink of intoxicating liquor; never gamble for a first stake; never taste the first dose of cocaine to know how it will affect you. In other words: never begin a bad habit and it can not become your master and crowd you out of the companionship of men.
_Do Not Be a Spendthrift_
The man who squanders his hard earned money is an enemy to himself.
By squandering money is meant expending it for something you do not need and which is of no value, use, or merit.
“A penny saved is a penny earned” is a well known saying, also “Take care of the pence and the pounds will take care of themselves.”
Don’t imagine it looks big when a young man is with his companions and throws his money right and left. Does he gain their respect? Never. They look upon him as a fool and while they are willing to take advantage of his “liberality,” it will always be noticed that they never reciprocate. They are wiser than he.
It is not necessary to be a miser either, for that is the other extreme and equally as reprehensible.
No man should live on crusts and hoard away his money for some public administrator to find and spend in fees when he is dead.
Neither can a man waste his money and expect to have any left for the rainy day that always comes to every mortal. Such a man says when he is too old to earn money, and is kicked about from pillar to post without friends or companions: “If I had only saved my money when I was young, I might be a rich man now.” That is quite true, but you wasted your money and you have reached the end of your chapter in life.
What do you want money for anyway? You can live on bread and water. There is a great question in this idea. We have needs; we have rights to be observed, to marry, to be decent, to live in healthy places, raise a family and educate them. All these things make a man, an American citizen, and if you throw away the money to make you these things, then you can not become any of them. In that case you are—nothing. Do you aspire to be a nonentity?
DON’T BE A KICKER OR A KNOCKER
If a man keeps on complaining about things in general and particular, he will soon be thrown out of decent society.
Grievances and troubles come to every man in this world, and every man knows it without constantly repeating it. He has his own troubles, and does not care to be saddled with yours.
This is a good old earth if you would take off your blue spectacles and look at it with your own eyes.
Some men are so dissatisfied with things that there is no pleasing them, but if you attempt to take from them the things that do not satisfy or please, they set up a roar.
When there is a wrong to be righted, some right to be protected, it is well enough to complain, but there are numerous persons who go about complaining all the time. When it is not one thing it is another.
These persons are given the name of “kickers,” and when they keep it up they are deemed “chronic kickers.”
It is sometimes impossible to pass these people by, lest a really suffering brother human be denied help. But they become known, and should be avoided for the sake of one’s peace of mind.
The strong man will bear his troubles in silence, but the weak one whines about them and fancies they are the worst.
If you stop to consider how this earth would get along without you, and that it did without you a long time, perhaps you would quit kicking and give others a rest from your complaints.
A little kicking may be useful, but too much of it lands a man outside the reach of opportunity.
A GOOD WOMAN THE GLORY OF MAN
Man’s Best Friend and Counselor
When God created Adam, it was found that he had no helpmeet, so woman was created to be his companion.
St. Paul says: “The woman is the glory of man,” and still farther elaborating the idea of the helpmeet says: “Neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.”
That is as much as saying that the man and the woman must stand side by side in this world as companions and helpmeets toward the glory of the Lord.
The Holy Scripture is full of allusions to good women. Thus: “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband,” 2 Prov. 12, 4. “Her price is above rubies,” Prov. 31, 10. “Dorcas: this woman was full of good works and almsdeeds which she did.”
As the mother of the Christ, woman, in the person of the Virgin Mary, has been put upon a high pedestal for a pattern and a model to all good women.
Her part in the world may be well explained by the words of the orator: “The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.”
The greatest deference and respect is the due of every woman, since she is the mother of the race, and its guardian and protector when in the helpless period of infancy.
The most beautiful and unanswerable tribute to women is paid by King Lemuel in the words of the prophecy that his mother taught him. It is to be found in Proverbs 31, and includes the entire chapter of 31 verses.
EDUCATE YOUR CHILDREN
It can not be doubted that education is the father and mother of opportunity and success in life.
You may know this from your own deficiencies, therefore, give those belonging to you a chance at opportunity and success by educating them.
You bring helpless beings into the world; you see them growing up amid modern surroundings that demand education, and it can not be possible that you will permit them to become weeds in the human garden—useless incumbrances to be thrown out upon the garbage heap.
It is the right of your children to be educated to fit some sphere in life. They are yours, and look to you to aid them. Besides, whatever you do to educate your children must redound to your own advantage.
Some people are jealous because their children know more than their parents. If your mind runs that way you come within the condemnation:
“He that provideth not for those of his own household hath denied the faith; he is the companion of the destroyer.”
Think this over and let it sink into your mind.
Your children want things you did not have when you were a child, and therefore, if the things that were good enough for you are not good enough for your children, they must go without. You reason like a cheese that is full of blind mites.
We are progressing far beyond the dreams of your youth, and your children are tied to the car of progress. You must not only let them go along with it, but you must help them to keep up with the procession. They are confronted by opportunities, and you dare not blind their eyes to them. Education is the only thing that will keep their eyes wide open to the chances of life.
THE GOLDEN RULE, OR THE PRINCIPLE OF LIVE AND LET LIVE
Life is a natural right in all men, and it is inalienable.
“The Lord is not willing that any should perish.”
Under our constitutions and laws, life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness are the inalienable rights of all men.
No man has a right, under any sort of provocation to deprive another of his life, no more has another man any right to deprive us of life.
There is an eternal balance in this right to live, and an eternal duty on our part to let our fellow man live. But there are indirect ways of accomplishing another man’s death, and we are equally as guilty as if we were to deprive him of life directly.
A mark was set upon the murderer Cain lest any one finding him should kill him. The right to live may be extended over all men, the sinner as well as the saint, even the murderer is marked so that his right to live shall not be interfered with.
When a man is in the full tide of vigorous life, his impression is that he has more right to live than the weak, decrepit and useless, but there is no such difference—the right is conferred upon all.
We must look to it lest we so act as to deprive another of this right to live, for though we may not actually kill, we may interfere with his life in many ways. We wrong him in many ways; destroy his character; interfere with his existence in business, by slander, and often “drive another to the wall,” as it is said. But when we do that we are interfering with that man’s right to live, for the right is attached to everything that a man may do. I have a right to work, but you say, “Not unless you do as I say.” This is an invasion of his right to live.
Every man orders his life to suit himself, it is his life and no one may order it for him. The Golden Rule is here exemplified: “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.” It is a good and safe rule to follow always.
DON’T GO INTO PARTNERSHIP WITH “THE DEVIL”
It may be true, as many contend, that every man has a personal devil within him that goads him on to do the wrong things at the right time. Any person who has that sort of a devil can easily get rid of him by the use of a strong will and determination.
But outside of him, this “Devil” is quite an institution whose great aim seems to be to monopolize you and everybody else. The feature he displays is a willingness to go into partnership with you in your undertakings.
He will make suggestions to you that sound plausible and good, and his promises are lurid. But beware of him, he is working for himself and not you. He is extremely selfish and will grab all the profits, leaving you thrown out like an old shoe that is no longer fit to wear.
A suggestion of wrong, of crooked work, of something that will injure your fellow man, that will best him, and cause him to lose money, character, friends, or honesty, comes from this outside Devil who wants you for a partner.
In a partnership the partners are supposed to work together for the common interest, but with the Devil as a partner you do all the work and he takes the pot of gold.
If you are a sterling, upright man, and insist upon being so, you may and probably will be tempted to go into partnership with the Devil, but knowing him, you will flaunt his honied words and stick to your uprightness. By and by he will leave you and you will win your way and enjoy all the profits.
In baptism you renounce the world, the flesh and the Devil. The world ruins you, the flesh overcomes you, and the Devil gets you. This is the usual routine, so stand by your baptismal vows, they are wise.
HONESTY THE BEST POLICY
Honesty is a question of morals. The law demands that all men shall be honest, but the maxim says it is the “best policy” to be honest.
To succeed in business or in any affairs where others are concerned, it behooves a man to be open and above board with every one.
The truth is, that a dishonest man is not wanted in anything where there is responsibility, or where a loss may result through dishonesty.
If a man is honest with himself, it is probable that he will be honest with others. In this respect, honesty is like charity: “It begins at home, but does not end there.”
To be honest does not mean merely that a man is not to steal another man’s money, but does mean that every man should be given his due, whether in financial matters or in duty. The man who half does his work, watches for the clock to hasten toward closing time, or dawdles when haste is required, is not honest, however square he may be in money matters.
The trouble is, we limit all our morality to money, and imagine that if we handle money carefully and without loss to the owner, we are honest.
Even taking that broad view of the virtue, we are robbing a man when we shirk work, do it badly, or pretend we can do a thing we can not do in a proper manner and take his money for the doing of it.
To be honest truly, a man must be fair in everything that pertains to his fellows. A man who will deliberately lie will cheat.
To give every man a square deal is to be honest.
Do As You Would Be Done By
It is not an easy matter to do to others what you would they should do unto you, when they are not following this rule themselves.
When Christ enunciated the Golden Rule in the Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 7, 12, he announced what is the law and the prophets.
“All things whatsoever you would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them.”
It is good morals and also contains a masterful business proposition. The reason is, because it is a moral precept, and men are inextricably mixed with morals in all their transactions.
We can not be guided in our actions by what other men do, except in a general way, but every one must be dependent upon his own energies, and be responsible for his own acts.
If we were to do as other men do to us, sometimes, we should be apt to cause a breach of the peace or commit a murder. That is conceded. But the persistent observation of this rule will bring all men around in your favor.
There is reason and common sense to be observed, however, in the observance of every moral precept. Thus: “Whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.”
This is good advice coming from the Great Master, but it is not interpreted as meaning that your cheeks shall be turned toward the smiter as long as he chooses to strike. There comes a time when the precept has been complied with, and then let the smiter beware, for a defense will be made.
We know what the Savior means in all His sayings. He inculcates peace if we have to fight for it. So it is well to be guarded in our too rigid observance of precepts, lest we fall into the contrary condition which would deprive us of our manhood.
“Be strong and quit yourselves like men.”
Keep in Touch With God
The wisest man that ever lived says: “Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth.”
The basis of a moral life is the remembrance of thy Creator. With this in your memory you will be able to establish a moral character; without it you can not have a moral life.
Below the nature of every man, the foundation of his nature, the everlasting rock upon which it is built, is God. He can not be ignored in any act, in any transaction. You may attempt to blot Him out, or cover Him up out of the sight of your own intelligence, but He is there always. He is your Creator, and the more you are in touch with Him, the more responsive you are to His promptings, the higher your moral character.
The old Pagans had no morality because they hid God from their own hearts and understandings, and substituted gods of wood and stone.
They really worshipped themselves, for when a man casts out God there is nothing but himself to worship.
The fact is, when men desire to lead immoral lives, or commit violations of law of any kind, they begin by closing their eyes to God and forgetting their Creator, and they say: “There is no Hell.”
In these days it is impossible for a man to live without a knowledge of his Creator. His name is everywhere and stamped upon everything. This very knowledge makes it incumbent upon every man to keep in touch with his Creator, for it is the common sentiment of all mankind, and can not be ignored.
The observance of every moral precept is prompted by the Creator, who “wills not that men shall perish, but that they shall live.”
To turn away from Him is to lose moral character, to keep in touch with Him is to preserve it. We keep in touch with God by remembering Him.
Do Not Try to Succeed Without the Help of God
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.” Proverbs, 3, 5.
The Lord is a mighty power of strength to you, as He is to all mankind, and He invites you to make use of that strength. Human life is a poor and small thing without something to make it of great importance. That something is the Lord, and He is part of our lives, of every moment, and we can not drive Him out of it. Why? Because He created us, and will not permit one of His creations to be without help.
“Not a sparrow falleth” that He does not know it, and how much more are you of interest than the sparrow? “Every hair of your head is numbered.”
Some men imagine they can get along without the help of God, but they deceive themselves. When they are prosperous they forget Him, but when adversity comes, they turn to Him for succor. Are they ever refused help? Not if asked in the proper spirit. He helps you if you help yourself, and you can not voluntarily lie in a ditch and ask God to help you out. That would be presumption.
By making God a part of your daily lives, taking counsel from Him and leaning upon Him for good qualities, you will be surprised at your success. You do not have to be a bigot, or a ranter; show by your example what you are and upon whom you lean for support.
Do not be shamed to give the Lord as the cause of your success, the greatest men of the earth have always recognized His hand.
Believe in Him faithfully and fully.
To an Atheist who did not believe in God, Napoleon Bonaparte in the height of his power said: “You do not believe in God? Who made the stars?”
The More a Man Gains Wisdom the Nearer He Gets to God
St. Paul says: “Whether ye eat or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.”
There is a glory of man and a glory of God. The former is transient, but the latter is eternal, and is what all men should aim to see.
“All flesh is grass, and all the glory of man as the flower of grass. The grass withereth, and the flower thereof falleth away.”
It is plain to every right thinking and reasoning man that we should seek that which is the best. We so act in all our business affairs, and why should we not do the same so far as our immortal souls are concerned?
The kingdom of God is His glory, and seeking that first, all other things will come to you.
In striving to attain to a sight of the glory of God, we are moving upward from every point of view. Compared with that glory, the man who seeks only the glory of man, is satisfied with tinsel instead of pure gold.
Do not imagine that because we are far away from the kingdom and glory of God, that it is not worth consideration. His glory is visible everywhere. In the rising sun; the flowers and plants; the winds and the rain; in the smallest animal, and particularly in man.
It can be cultivated, and imitated by using the intellect. The more a man learns the nearer he gets to the glory of God, and the better he will be prepared to finally reach it.
All men are moved and have their being in pursuance to a law of God who created all things for His own glory. You are intended to share in that glory, it is your heritage as a man.
Do Not Violate the Laws of Nature
To violate any law is reprehensible, and in most cases is punishable.
A man steals, and he is put in jail as a punishment for not letting another man’s property alone. It is his and you have no right to it, wherefore you are punished.
But when you violate a law of nature, you are inflicting an injury upon yourself such as no wise man will do.