Part 3

She looked at Lady Grace, who said, “The Queen has always disliked having anything said against the Woodens, and has often told me that if she had not been born Wax she would have liked to be born Wood.”

There were murmurs of approbation at this speech, and Wooden’s mother said, “Wax is as wax does, I always say. If all was as polite as the Queen, there wouldn’t be no trouble at all. But you haven’t told us about the Queen’s health yet, Mrs. Noah.”

“Well,” said Mrs. Noah, “it’s my belief that the Queen is dead.”

“Dear, dear!” said Wooden’s mother. “And such a nice lady as she was, too.”

“What makes you think that, Mrs. Noah?” asked Lady Grace. “Surely I should have heard of it if it had been true.”

“Well, perhaps you would, Lady Grace,” said Mrs. Noah. “Anyhow, she is alarmingly ill, and has appointed King Selim regent, to act in her place until she gets better. And if she dies, King Selim is to reign in her place. You see, the Queen having no children, naturally the only other royal person in Toyland has to reign instead of her.”

“Is that the law in Toyland?” asked Peggy.

Mrs. Noah looked at her affectionately. “Bless your pretty face, what questions you do ask, dear,” she said. “I don’t know nothing about the law, but it’s what King Selim says, and of course he knows, or else he wouldn’t say it.”

“Oh, no,” said Wooden decisively. “Some people don’t like him, but he isn’t as bad as that. Was it him that ordered the royal barge to meet us, Mrs. Noah?”

“Yes, it was,” said Mrs. Noah. “Now I must be getting back to my old man. He says there ain’t no flavour in his pipe unless I fill it for him.”

“I hope the Queen isn’t really dead,” said Wooden, when Mrs. Noah had left them. “That would indeed be a sad pity. Look, dear, you can see Dolltown now. It won’t be long before we are there now.”

The ark had turned a bend in the river, and Peggy could see across the flat plains a large town with an enormous tower standing in the middle of it.

“That is the House of Cards,” said Wooden, in answer to her question. “It stands in the middle of the market-place, and is thirteen stories high.”

“What is it used for?” asked Peggy.

“It is used for going to the top of, dear,” replied Wooden. “You get a magnificent view of the surrounding country, and when you have looked at it you come down again.”

It was not long before they reached the outskirts of Dolltown. On either side of the river were rows of houses in which the poorer dolls, mostly wooden and rag, lived. The weather was warm, and many of the fronts of the houses stood wide open, showing the inside of the four rooms into which each of them was divided. There were generally a kitchen and a dining-room on the ground floor, and a drawing-room and a bedroom above. None of these houses had staircases, and it was puzzling to think how the dolls could get into the upstairs rooms. Wooden explained, when Peggy asked her, that the dolls either climbed in through the windows, or, if the house-front was open, put a kitchen chair on the kitchen table, and scrambled up somehow. Those who were not strong enough to do so had to spend the night sitting on chairs in the kitchen or dining-room.

“Isn’t that rather uncomfortable for them?” asked Peggy.

“Well, dear, perhaps it is rather,” said Wooden. “But, you see, we’re not so particular as you are, so we don’t feel it so much.”

“But didn’t you say there wasn’t any night in Toyland?” asked Peggy.

“Perhaps, I did, dear. I say so many things in the course of time that I can’t possibly remember all of them. But there is one thing I should never do, and that is tell a lie.”

Peggy looked at her quickly, fearing that she might be offended, but her face still wore its amiable sweet-tempered expression, and when Peggy gave her a kiss, just in _case_ she might have said something to hurt her, she kissed her back, and called her a precious lamb.

Some of the dolls’ houses that they were passing were quite well furnished. Others had furniture a good deal too large for the rooms, but the dolls seemed all to be of one size, and Wooden told Peggy that, however large or small a doll might be in the nursery, when it got home to Toyland it became as large as life.

All the inhabitants of these small houses came thronging down to the banks of the river to see the procession of animals, and to cheer the royal ark as it passed along. Peggy noticed that the wooden dolls cheered more heartily than the wax dolls and china dolls and composition dolls. In fact one party of Dutch dolls became so excited as the ark passed that they all fell into the river, and had to be rescued by Mr. Noah’s youngest son, who was attending to the elephants. All were got safely to land, except the father of the Dutch doll family, who swam out and clung to the ark, and was dragged on board by Mr. Noah himself.

Just at the moment when this was happening Wooden’s aunt came out of the saloon, and seemed highly delighted at the scene. She bent down and slapped her knees with both her hands, and then threw her head back and roared with laughter.

“Lawks! I wouldn’t have missed that for anything,” she said, when the Dutch doll had been led below. “Well, I’ve had a nice little nap, girls, and now I’ve come to cheer you all up a bit.”

“Then behave yourself, do, Polly,” said Wooden’s mother severely, “and don’t let’s have any more of your carryings on.”

When the Dutch doll was quite dry he insisted upon being led into the presence of “the company.” Mr. Noah had lent him his second-best yellow robe, in which he looked rather funny, as it was too long for him. He came up the steps from the saloon, and, tripping over the skirt of the robe, fell flat at the feet of Wooden’s aunt, who roared with laughter at him again.

So far from getting up again as quickly as possible, the Dutch doll remained where he was, rubbing his forehead on the deck of the ark.

“Get up, man,” said Wooden’s mother sharply, “and don’t stop lying there like a silly.”

The Dutch doll got up, looking foolish, and bowed low to Wooden’s aunt. “I hope your Majesty is quite well,” he said. “I am very pleased to see your Majesty.”

“Lawks! he calls me ‘your Majesty!’” said Wooden’s aunt. “Well, I never! I shall die of laughing if this goes on.” And indeed it seemed likely that she would.

“The man’s silly,” said Wooden’s mother. “His ducking has turned his head. The Queen isn’t here. We’re only the party that the royal ark has been sent down for.”

But still the Dutch doll kept on bowing to Wooden’s aunt, and calling her your Majesty; and Wooden’s aunt enjoyed it.

Lady Grace intervened in her polite and aristocratic manner. “Don’t you know Queen Rosebud by sight?” she asked. “In calling this lady your Majesty you are coming very near to telling a story.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t do that, my lady,” said the Dutch doll, much shocked. “Queen Rosebud is dead, you know.”

“I feared it,” said Wooden. “It is very sad.”

Lady Grace turned pale. “She was a loving mistress and a great Queen,” she said.

Wooden’s mother said, “Yes, she was. But crying out about it won’t bring her to life again, poor thing!” And Wooden’s aunt had the grace to leave off with her nonsense, and say, “I’m sure I’m sorry to hear the news. Then who is going to be Queen now?”

“You are, your Majesty,” said the Dutch doll, bowing to her again. “King Selim is going to marry you.”

“What, marry me!” exclaimed Wooden’s aunt, forgetting to be vulgar for once, in her surprise. “Well, I never! Why, I hardly know the gentleman.”

“Surely you are making some mistake,” said Lady Grace.

The Dutch doll looked offended. “Do you think I’d tell you a lie?” he asked.

“Oh, no, of course he wouldn’t do that,” said Wooden hastily. “If he says so, of course it is so. But you’re not Queen yet, aunt.”

“No, nor never will be, if you don’t learn to behave proper,” said Wooden’s mother. “If I was you I should keep quiet till the wedding ceremony.”

Wooden’s aunt seemed to think this was good advice, for she gave no more trouble till the ark drew up at the royal quay in the middle of Dolltown.

V

ARRIVAL AT THE ROYAL PALACE OF DOLLTOWN

The Royal Quay was a great open space carpeted with red felt, and decorated with palms and flowers. Wooden soldiers were standing all round the square, and inside it was a royal carriage with six wooden horses, and servants in scarlet liveries. A little troop of lead soldiers on black horses was drawn up by the carriage, and looked very gallant with their scarlet tunics, silver breastplates and helmets and waving plumes. Lady Grace blushed when she saw that the head of the troop was Colonel Jim, and said to Peggy, “The rather nice-looking officer is a friend of mine, dear. I will introduce him to you when I get an opportunity.”

Behind the wooden soldiers was a great crowd of dolls, all cheering themselves hoarse as the royal ark was being tied up by the quay, and the bridge was being run out. Peggy noticed that there were no wax dolls among them, and rather wondered at this, but had not time to ask about it in the excitement of the moment.

Just by the landing stage was a little group of gentlemen dolls. The most important person in it was an old gentleman doll of patriarchal aspect. He had no beard, but his head was completely bald, and he was dressed in a long gown of black velvet. As soon as the bridge between the quay and the ark was put into position, he came forward with his party on to the platform of the ark, and bowed low before Wooden, who happened to be standing a little in front of the rest.

“Welcome, your Majesty,” he said, “to the Capital of your kingdom of Toyland. I will explain why I thus address you later.”

Wooden was quite taken back, and could only stammer out, “But Mr.--Mr.--I don’t know your name, but----”

“My name is Norval,” said the old gentleman doll. “And I am the Lord Chancellor of your Majesty’s kingdom.”

“But why do you call me your Majesty, Mr. Norval?” asked Wooden.

“_Lord_ Norval, at your Majesty’s pleasure,” corrected the Lord Chancellor. “I address you as a Queen because King Selim, successor to our late lamented Queen Rosebud, has intimated his intention of marrying you, and in these matters I feel that one cannot begin too soon. Besides, it is his Majesty’s pleasure that you should be paid every possible honour, as his highly respected bride to be.”

“But Lord Noodle!” stammered Wooden, getting his name a little wrong in her perplexity, “this gentleman said that it was my aunt here that the king wanted to marry.”

She indicated the Dutch doll, and the Lord Chancellor looked at him in anger. “Did you say that?” he asked.

Wooden’s aunt broke in before the Dutch doll could speak. “Yes, he did say it,” she said. “And I ain’t going to give up my Selim for nobody. Him and me has always been friendly like, and I wasn’t a bit surprised to hear he wanted to marry me. Why should he want to marry a young thing like Wooden, I should like to know? Why she’s like a kid beside of him! It’s me that’s going to be Queen, not her.”

“Captain Cook,” said the Lord Chancellor to a lead soldier of his party, “arrest this Dutchman for telling a lie, and arrest this woman for telling another.”

“What, me!” cried Wooden’s aunt. “How dare you accuse me of telling a lie, you old creature with a head like an egg? How dare you? What lie have I told?”

“Arrest her again for insulting the Lord Chancellor,” said Lord Norval. “You said you were going to be Queen, and that’s a lie. King Selim wouldn’t look at you. He has confided to me that he has been in love with--with--I suppose I had better say _Princess_ Wooden, for some time, and has reason to believe that she is not indifferent to him.”

“Well, he has looked at me sometimes,” said Wooden, “but I’m sure I never gave him any encouragement. I don’t like him very much, Lord Noodle. He’s a foreigner, you see, and I don’t like foreigners. Couldn’t it be arranged for him to marry my aunt, as she’s ready for him! I’d rather it was her than me.”

The Lord Chancellor looked muddled. “I couldn’t say anything without consulting his Majesty,” he said. “He _might_ consent; but then again he might not. The best way will be for us all to go up to the Palace, as already ordered, and ask him. I am sorry your aunt will have to appear there under arrest, but as she has committed a crime, or rather two crimes, that can’t be helped.”

The situation was certainly awkward. Nobody quite seemed to know what to do about it. But Peggy, who had been listening with great interest to what had been said, ventured to make a suggestion. “If Wooden’s aunt _does_ marry the King,” she said, “then she wouldn’t have told a story, would she?”

Everybody brightened up, and the Lord Chancellor said, “That is one of the cleverest things I ever heard said. But who is this ingenious and attractive-looking young lady, may I ask?”

Wooden explained to him who Peggy was, and he bowed low to her, and said he was proud to make her acquaintance. “Well, after what you have pointed out,” he said, “I have no difficulty in unarresting this lady for telling a lie. But she has also insulted a high official. She said that my head was like an egg. It may be or it may not be, but nobody could say that it was a polite thing to point out.”

He looked at Peggy as if he expected her to make another suggestion, and would not be sorry if she made it.

Peggy could think of nothing better to say than, “I like eggs myself, especially if they are new-laid.”

The Lord Chancellor caught at this instantly. “Did you have a new-laid egg in your mind when you referred to my head, Madam?” he asked of Wooden’s aunt.

Wooden’s aunt, who was looking much more subdued than usual, standing by the officer who had arrested her, said, “Well, there’s one thing I never would do, and that’s tell a lie. I can’t rightly say that I had a new-laid egg in my mind, because I won’t deceive you, I don’t know where my mind is. I went to sea early, and never had much schooling, and never learnt no physiognomy. There may be a new-laid egg in my mind, or there may not. I wouldn’t like to say.”

“What I would suggest to you, madam,” said the Lord Chancellor, “is that in likening my head to an egg you didn’t mean an old-laid egg, or an addled egg, or a bad egg, or anything of that sort. If it is like an egg at all, it was a fresh egg you meant.”

“Oh, lawks, yes,” said Wooden’s aunt. “I’d never be one for insulting a gentleman. I know what’s due to myself and my family better.”

“Then that is quite enough for me,” said the Lord Chancellor, evidently greatly relieved. “Captain Cook, unarrest this lady completely.”

“And the Dutch doll, too,” said Peggy, pleased at having succeeded so well.

“And the Dutch doll, too, of course, Captain Cook,” said the Lord Chancellor. “And my advice to you, sir, is to make yourself scarce. You have had a narrow escape, and let it be a lesson to you.”

The Dutch doll, whose knees had been knocking together with fright, picked up the skirts of Mr. Noah’s second-best yellow robe, and ran away as fast as he could. He poked in between two of the wooden soldiers guarding the quay, and was lost in the crowd. But he was an honest doll, for the next morning Mr. Noah received back his second-best robe by parcel’s post, with a note of thanks, which he could not read, as it was written in double-Dutch.

The party was now ready to land and get into the royal carriage, but just as they had stepped off on to the red carpet on the quay, the Lord Chancellor’s eyes fell upon Lady Grace, whom he seemed not to have noticed before.

His face darkened, and he said, “Why, what is this? A wax doll at large, after the royal proclamation that all Waxes are to be imprisoned! Captain Cook, do your duty instantly.”

Captain Cook stepped forward to arrest Lady Grace, who shrank away from him, while Wooden and her mother and aunt began to protest volubly against such an outrage, for they were all friendly to Lady Grace, who had always treated them with perfect politeness.

Peggy felt dreadfully frightened at the moment at all the hubbub, and at the idea of poor Lady Grace being taken off to prison; but just as she was trying to think what she could do to stop it there was an unexpected diversion. Colonel Jim, the officer in charge of the Lifeguards standing by the royal carriage, rode forward with a clatter of harness and accoutrements, and said in a loud voice, “Unhand that lady!”

There was a moment’s pause. Then the Lord Chancellor said, “Colonel Jim, you are taking a great deal upon yourself. You know what the royal proclamation was. All Waxes are to be arrested and sent to prison.”

“What for?” asked Colonel Jim, with soldierly brevity.

“The general charge against them,” said the Lord Chancellor, “is giving themselves airs.”

“Has Lady Grace ever given herself airs?” asked Colonel Jim.

“No, that she never has,” said Wooden’s mother indignantly. “I will say this for her, Wax or no Wax, that a nicer-spoken or nicer-behaved lady never stept.”

“And she was a great favourite of Queen Rosebud’s, besides,” said Wooden. “She thought the world of her.”

And even Wooden’s aunt showed up well in the emergency. “If I’m to be Queen,” she said, “I shall have Lady Grace as my own lady-in-waiting. She shall put in my hairpins for me, which I never could do rightly myself. And how’s she to do that if she’s in prison?”

Colonel Jim rode back to his troop without saying another word. But his interference had been successful, for the Lord Chancellor said, “Under the circumstances, I will not have Lady Grace arrested now. She can come with us to the Palace, and we will see what the King has to say about it.”

Then Wooden and her mother and aunt, and Lady Grace and Peggy got into the royal carriage, and the Lord Chancellor and his suite got into two other carriages. Colonel Jim and his Life Guardsmen formed themselves on either side, and with a clash and a glitter, the little procession started. The wooden soldiers all presented arms, and made a way through for them, and they drove off the quay and into the streets of Dolltown.

Peggy had been rather surprised that the dolls had not shown more grief at the sudden death of the Queen, though all of them had certainly spoken very nicely about it when the news had first come to them, and were evidently sorry that she had died. But she now began to understand that dolls do not take things in quite the same way as human beings. For one thing, there were no signs of mourning in the streets, but on the other hand there were flags on some of the houses, and all the people seemed to be out of doors watching for the royal procession, and when it appeared they cheered heartily, and seemed as happy and pleased as possible. This was all the more remarkable because, if what the Lord Chancellor had said was true, which of course it was, as he would never have told a lie, all the wax dolls in the place had already been sent off to prison, and you might have thought that that would have sobered the rest. But even the four dolls in the carriage seemed to have forgotten it, and also the unpleasant episode of Lady Grace nearly being taken off to prison, too. They were all anxious to point out to Peggy the interesting sights to be seen on either side of them, and had nothing to say about anything else, not even about what might happen when they arrived at the royal palace. And as they seemed able to forget everything but the pleasure and interest of the moment, Peggy was able to do so, too.

What she saw of Dolltown enchanted her. It was like all the toys she had ever had, and her friends had had, and she had seen in shop-windows, all become real, and not only that, but of a size to be used. All little girls know what it is to wish that they could sometimes live in their own dolls’ houses, especially in the big ones, where there are staircases that they could go up and down if only they were of the right size, and all sorts of nice furniture, and dinner-sets and tea-sets, and other things which they would like to use themselves and not always be making believe with. Well, in Dolltown, and in fact in the whole of Toyland, there was no making believe. Everything was as real as real, even the smallest things for the smallest dolls. Peggy could have used everything she saw herself, and it was really quite thrilling and delightful to feel that she could pretend to be a doll if she wanted to, and have all the fun for herself that little girls give to their dolls.

Just outside the royal quay was a large station, with platforms and signal boxes and bridges and lines of rails all complete, and a train waiting there with a bright green clockwork engine, ready to go off into the country. One of Peggy’s boy cousins had collected a splendid railway plant--his relations always gave him things for it at Christmas and on his birthdays--and Peggy had often wished she could go for a ride in it all round his playroom floor, and be shunted and go under the little tunnels, and stop at the stations, just as the tin soldiers he put into the carriages did. Well, it would be just as much fun going in this railway system, and she could get into the toy carriages just as easily as her cousin’s tin soldiers.

They crossed over the river on one of those suspension bridges that you see in shop-windows, and then climbed a hill into the town. At the beginning of the hill was a large toy fort, crammed with tin soldiers, who were looking over the parapet and cheering them as they passed.

Then they went through a street of shops, and the joints of meat hanging in the butchers’ shops, and the fish lying on the slabs of the fishmongers’ shops, and the stores in the grocery shops were all real; and specially attractive were the highly-coloured fruits.

As for the shops where they sold the baby-clothes, they were too delightful. But the first one they passed brought a most disturbing thought to Peggy. She turned to Wooden and said, “Oh, Wooden, dear, where are all the long-clothes babies! Surely they haven’t been cruel enough to send them to prison, too!”

“Oh, no, dear,” said Wooden decidedly. “Nobody is cruel in Toyland.”

Peggy did not feel quite so sure of that, considering that Lady Grace had nearly been sent to prison already for being wax; and of course most long-clothes babies are wax, or composition. “Then where are they!” she asked.

“They are all having their morning sleep, dear,” said Wooden’s mother, and Peggy had to be content.

When they reached the more important streets of Dolltown, most of the houses were built of wooden or terra-cotta bricks, and very fine some of them were. But this part of the town _was_ rather silent and deserted, for the owners of most of the fine houses were wax, and they had all been taken off to prison.

At last they reached the royal palace. It was a most gorgeous building, built of ivory, with windows made of enormous diamonds and rubies and emeralds and sapphires, all glittering in the sun.

The carriages drew up underneath an ivory porch. The Lord Chancellor was at the door of the royal one as soon as it was opened. “I will conduct you straight to his Majesty,” he said.

VI

KING SELIM HOLDS AN AUDIENCE

They were led through several magnificent ivory halls, with a great many looking-glasses in them but scarcely any furniture, and into the great Hall of Audience, where there was a lovely ivory throne on a daïs at one end, and on either side of the Hall a row of ivory chairs.

Here Peggy had two great surprises.

The first surprise was the new King, who was sitting on the throne. Directly she saw him, Peggy exclaimed, “Why, he’s a White Chess King!”