Part 7

“Kitten,” he require, “how much pounds you lost to-day?”

Peeved silence by her.

“O dearie,” he deplore. “If you continue this bant some longer, home will never seem snug again. Since you started to reduce, you have become fatter and me thinner. In attempting to reduce your waist you merely make your mind narrow. The less you eat the more biting your replies becomes. O fill my home like once you used to do, or I shall blow off and become suddenly zero!”

Thus he say it with voice like a sad actor. But she merely set exercising her elbows cruely like a Svoboda.

Next morning while Hon. Mrs were off making lonesome walk for thinness, I was in kitchen thinking thoughtfully about Fat. Why should ladies abhor this delicious padding? I ask to know. Are not round circles more beautiful than straight strings? Are not pillows more lovely as snakes? Answer is, Yes!!!

Therefore, I must lead this Boss Lady away from her emaciated mania before her husband removed himself from her peeved disposition and happy home was shipwrecked around my kitchen.

So I lit gas stove, took out recipe book, flour, sugar, apples & other nourishments and with immediate quickness I began stewing things what smelled like a banquet.

At noon time Hon. Mrs Madam come to table and set down, as usual, with forceable-feeding expression.

I put Hon. Soup befront of her. She startle.

“What food is this which smell so disobediently fragrant?” she ask out.

“Tometoes soup six inches thick & full of fatty nourishment,” I rake off.

“I refuse to eat such!” she yellup--and before I could took it away she had assimilated it entirely with spoon.

Next dish were turkey hash escorted by fried potatus, cinnamoney rolls, jelly & baked bean.

“I shall scold you!” she commence, but could not do so because she was too busy forking that food with considerable smacks.

And so onward through complete programme of vegetables until she reach apple dumpling & 2 cups chocolate.

She sigh.

Pretty soonly I observe her in parlour-room laying on sofa, eating candy-box and reading Mrs Humpley Ward book for sentimental joys. Sleep arrived nextly, and I felt quite patriotic to think how peaceful she was for 2 complete hours.

At hour of 4:27 p. m. she came to kitchen with new expression of brightly smiling.

“Togo,” she report, “you have saved my life by your disobedience. How dare you?”

“A Samurai ain’t afraid of nothing, not even Fat,” I snuggest.

“You have went strickly against my orders,” she guggle. “It were a delicious meal. Yet I must punish you for your impertinence. How much wages I owe you?”

“$5,” I acknowledge.

“Here are $15,” she explode. “$5 for your disobedience & $10 for your talents. Henceforward you are fired.”

“I was never more affectionately discharged in all my experience,” I absolve while putting on hat & coat. “While I am vacant from this job would you please hire my Cousin Nogi, who is also intelligent?”

“If he are a good cook, send him around,” she greet while I depart feeling like my brain was on backwards.

Hoping you are the same Yours truly _Hashimura Togo_.