Chapter 2

There was an old person of Shoreham, Whose habits were marked by decorum; He bought an Umbrella, and sate in the cellar, Which pleased all the people of Shoreham.

There was an old person of Bar, Who passed all her life in a jar, Which she painted pea-green, to appear more serene, That placid old person of Bar.

There was a young person of Kew, Whose virtues and vices were few; But with blamable haste she devoured some hot paste, Which destroyed that young person of Kew.

There was an old person of Jodd, Whose ways were perplexing and odd; She purchased a whistle, and sate on a thistle, And squeaked to the people of Jodd.

There was an old person of Bude, Whose deportment was vicious and crude; He wore a large ruff of pale straw-colored stuff, Which perplexed all the people of Bude.

There was an old person of Brigg, Who purchased no end of a wig; So that only his nose, and the end of his toes, Could be seen when he walked about Brigg.

There was an old man of Messina, Whose daughter was named Opsibeena; She wore a small wig, and rode out on a pig, To the perfect delight of Messina.

TWENTY-SIX NONSENSE RHYMES AND PICTURES.

The Absolutely Abstemious Ass, who resided in a Barrel, and only lived on Soda Water and Pickled Cucumbers.

The Bountiful Beetle, who always carried a Green Umbrella when it didn't rain, and left it at home when it did.

The Comfortable Confidential Cow, who sate in her Red Morocco Arm Chair and toasted her own Bread at the parlour Fire.

The Dolomphious Duck, who caught Spotted Frogs for her dinner with a Runcible Spoon.

The Enthusiastic Elephant, who ferried himself across the water with the Kitchen Poker and a New pair of Ear-rings.

The Fizzgiggious Fish, who always walked about upon Stilts, because he had no legs.

The Good-natured Grey Gull, who carried the Old Owl, and his Crimson Carpet-bag, across the river, because he could not swim.

The Hasty Higgeldipiggledy Hen, who went to market in a Blue Bonnet and Shawl, and bought a Fish for her Supper.

The Inventive Indian, who caught a Remarkable Rabbit in a Stupendous Silver Spoon.

The Judicious Jubilant Jay, who did up her Back Hair every morning with a Wreath of Roses, Three feathers, and a Gold Pin.

The Kicking Kangaroo, who wore a Pale Pink Muslin dress with Blue spots.

The Lively Learned Lobster, who mended his own Clothes with a Needle and Thread.

The Melodious Meritorious Mouse, who played a merry minuet on the Piano-forte.

The Nutritious Newt, who purchased a Round Plum-pudding for his grand-daughter.

The Obsequious Ornamental Ostrich, who wore Boots to keep his feet quite dry.

The Perpendicular Purple Polly, who read the Newspaper and ate Parsnip Pie with his Spectacles.

The Queer Querulous Quail, who smoked a Pipe of tobacco on the top of a Tin Tea-kettle.

The Rural Runcible Raven, who wore a White Wig and flew away with the Carpet Broom.

The Scroobious Snake, who always wore a Hat on his Head, for fear he should bite anybody.

The Tumultuous Tom-tommy Tortoise, who beat a Drum all day long in the middle of the wilderness.

The Umbrageous Umbrella-maker, whose Face nobody ever saw, because it was always covered by his Umbrella.

The Visibly Vicious Vulture, who wrote some Verses to a Veal-cutlet in a Volume bound in Vellum.

The Worrying Whizzing Wasp, who stood on a Table, and played sweetly on a Flute with a Morning Cap.

The Excellent Double-extra XX imbibing King Xerxes, who lived a long while ago.

The Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo, whose Head was ever so much bigger than his Body, and whose Hat was rather small.

The Zigzag Zealous Zebra, who carried five Monkeys on his back all the way to Jellibolee.