Chapter 3

The next thing he exposes, is the project communicated at _Oxford_, by a worthy Gentleman since deceased. But since he avowed himself, that it was but a rough draught, our Author might have paid more respect to his memory, than to endeavour to render it ridiculous. But let us see how he mends the matter in his own which follows.

_If the Duke were only banished, during life, and the Administration put into the hands of Protestants, that would establish an unnatural War of Expediency, against an avowed Right and Title. But on the other hand exclude the Duke, and all other Popish Successors, and put down all those Guards are now so illegally kept up, and banish the Papists, where can be the danger of a War, in a Nation unanimous_?

I will not be unreasonable with him; I will expect English no where from the barrenness of his Country: but if he can make sense of his _Unnatural War of Expediency_, I will forgive him two false Grammars, and three Barbarisms, in every Period of his Pamphlet; and yet leave him enow of each to expose his ignorance, whensoever I design it. But his Expedient it self is very solid, if you mark it. _Exclude the Duke, take away the Guards_, and consequently, all manner of defence from the Kings Person; _Banish every Mothers Son of the Papists, whether guilty or not guilty in particular of the Plot_. And when Papists are to be banished, I warrant you all Protestants in Masquerade must go for company; and when none but a pack of Sectaries and Commonwealths-men are left in _England_, where indeed will be the danger of a War, in a Nation unanimous? After this, why does not some resenting Friend of _Marvel_'s, put up a Petition to the Soveraigns of his party, that his Pension of four hundred pounds _per annum_, may be transferred to some one amongst them, who will not so notoriously betray their cause by dullness and insufficiency? As for the illegal Guards, let the Law help them; or let them be disbanded; for I do not think they have need of any Champion.

The next twenty Lines are only an illustration upon his Expedient: for he is so fond of his darling Notion, that he huggs it to death, as the Ape did her young one. He gives us his Bill of Tautology once more; for he threatens, that they would not rest at the Exclusion; but the Papists must again be banish'd, and the Dukes Creatures put out of Office both Civil and Military. Now the Dukes Creatures, I hope, are Papists, or little better; so that this is all the same: as if he had been conning over this ingenious Epigram;

There was a man who with great labour, and much pain; Did break his neck, and break his neck, and break his neck again.

At the last, to shew his hand is not out in the whole Paragraph, when the Duke is excluded, his Creatures put out of Office, the Papists banished twice over; and the Church of _England_-men delivered to Satan, yet still he says the Duke is the great Minister of State; and the Kings Excellent Qualities give his Brother still opportunities to ruine us and our Religion. Even excluded, and without Friends and Faction he can do all this; and the King is endued with most excellent Qualities to suffer it.

Having found my man, methinks I can scarce afford to be serious with him any longer; but to treat him as he deserves, like an ill Bouffoon.

_He defends the sharpess of the Addresses of which his Majesty complains_: but I suppose it would be better for him, and me, to let our Principals engage, and to stand by ourselves. I confess, I have heard some members of that House, wish, that all Proceedings had been carried with less vehemence. But my Author goes further on the other hand; _He affirms, that many wise and good men thought they had gone too far, in assuring, nay, in mentioning of money before our safety was fully provided for_. So you see he is still for laying his hand upon the penny. In the mean time I have him in a Praemunire for arraigning the House of Commons; for he has tacitely confessed, that the wise and good men were the fewer; because the House carryed it for mentioning money in their Address. But it seems they went too far, in speaking of a Supply, before they had consulted this Gentleman, how far the safety of the Nation would admit it. I find plainly by his temper, that if matters had come to an accommodation, and a bargain had been a bargain, the Knights of the Shire must have been the Protestant Knights no longer.

_As for Arbitrary Power of taking men into custody, for matters that had no relation to Privileges of Parliament, he says they have erred with their Fathers._ If he confess that they have erred, let it be with all their Generation, still they have erred: and an error of the first digestion, is seldom mended in the second. But I find him modest in this point; and knowing too well they are not a Court of Judicature, he does not defend them from Arbitrary Proceedings, but only excuses, and palliates the matter, by saying, that it concern'd the Rights of the People, in suppressing their Petitions to the Fountain of Justice. So, when it makes for him, he can allow the King to be the _Fountain of Justice_, but at other times he is only a _Cistern of the People._ But he knows sufficiently, however he dissembles it, that there were some taken into custody, to whom that crime was not objected. Yet since in a manner he yields up the Cause, I will not press him too far, where he is so manifestly weak. Tho I must tell him by the way, that he is as justly to be proceeded against for calling the Kings Proclamation illegal, which concerned the matter of Petitioning, as some of those, who had pronounced against them by the House of Commons, that terrible sentence, of _Take him,_ Topham.

_The strange illegal Votes declaring several eminent persons to be Enemies to the King and Kingdom, are not so strange, he says, but very justifiable_. I hope he does not mean, that illegal Votes are now not strange in the House of Commons: But observe the reason which he gives: for the House of Commons had before address'd for their removal from about the King. It was his business to have prov'd, that an Address of the House of Commons, without Process, order of Law, hearing any Defence, or offering any proof against them is sufficient ground to remove any person from the King: But instead of this he only proves, that former Addresses have been made, _Which no body can deny_. When he has throughly settled this important point, that Addresses have certainly been made, instead of an Argument to back it, he only thinks, that one may affirm by Law, _That the King ought to have no person about him, who has the misfortune of such a Vote_. But this is too ridiculous to require an Answer. They who will have a thing done, and give no reason for it, assume to themselves a manifest Arbitrary Power. Now this Power cannot be in the Representatives, if it be not in the People: or if it be in them, the People is absolute. But since he wholly thinks it, let him injoy the privilege of every Free Born Subject, to have the Bell clinck to him what he imagines.

Well; all this while he has been in pain about laying his Egg: at the last we shall have him cackle.

_If the House of Commons declare they have just Reasons to fear, that such a person puts the King upon Arbitrary Councils, or betrays His and the Nations Interest, in such a Case, Order and Process of Law is not necessary to remove him; but the Opinion and Advice of the Nation is enough; because bare removing neither fines him, nor deprives him of Life, Liberty, or Offices, wherein State Affairs are not concern'd._

Hitherto, he has only prov'd, according to his usual Logick, that bare removing, is but bare removing, and that to deprive a man of a Publick Office is not so much as it would be to hang him: all that possibly can be infer'd from this Argument, is only that a Vote may do a less wrong, but not a greater. Let us see how be proceeds.

_If he be not remov'd upon such Address, you allow him time to act his Villany; and the Nation runs the hazard_.

I answer, if the House have just Reasons on their side, 'tis but equitable they should declare them; for an Address in this Case is an Appeal to the King against such a man: and no Appeal is supposed to be without the Causes which induc'd it. But when they ask a Removal, and give no reason for it; they make themselves Judges of the Matter, and consequently they appeal not, but command. If they please to give their Reasons, they justifie their Complaint; for then their Address is almost in the nature of an Impeachment; and in that Case they may procure a hearing when they please. But barely to declare, that they suspect any man, without charging him with particular Articles, is almost to confess, they can find none against him. To suppose a man has time to act his Villanies, must suppose him first to be a Villain: and if they suspect him to be such, nothing more easie than to name his Crimes, and to take from him all opportunities of future mischief. But at this rate of bare addressing, any one who has a publick profitable Employment might be remov'd; for upon the private Picque of a Member he may have a party rais'd for an Address against him. And if his Majesty can no sooner reward the Services of any one who is not of their party, but they can vote him out of his Employment; it must at last follow, that none but their own party must be employ'd, and then a Vote of the House of Commons, is in effect the Government. Neither can that be call'd the Advice and Opinion of the whole Nation, by my Author's favour, where the other two Estates, and the Soveraign are not consenting.

_'Tis no matter_, says this Gentleman; _there are some things so reasonable, that they are above any written Law: and will in despite of any Power on Earth have their effect, whereof this is one_.

I love a man who deals plainly; he explicitly owns this is not Law, and yet it is reasonable; and will have its effect as if it were. See then, in the first place the written Law is laid aside: that sence is thrown open to admit reason in a larger denomination. Now that reason which is not Law, must be either Enthusiasm, or the head-strong will of a whole Nation combin'd: because in despite of any Earthly Power it will have its effect; so that, which way soever our Author takes it, he must mean Fanaticism, or Rebellion: Law grounded on reason is resolv'd into the Absolute Power of the People; and this is _Ratio ultima Reipublicae_.

Furthermore; _The King is a publick Person: in his private capacity_, as we are told, _he can only eat and drink; and perform some other acts of nature which shall be nameless. But his actings without himself,_ says my grave Author, _are only as a King. In his politick capacity he ought not to marry, love, hate, make war, or peace, but as a King; and agreeable to the People, and their Interest he governs._

In plain terms then, as he is a man he has nothing left to do: for the Actions which are mention'd, are those only of an Animal, or which are common to Man and Beast. And as he is a King he has as little Business, for there he is at the disposing of the People: and the only use that can be made of such a Monarch, is for an Innkeeper to let upon a Sign-Post to draw custom. But these Letters of Instruction how he should behave himself in his Kingly Office, cannot but call to mind how he was school'd and tutor'd, when the Covenanters made just such another Prince of him in _Scotland_. When the terrible fasting day was come, if he were sick in bed, no remedy, he must up and to Kirk; and that without a mouthful of Bread to stay his Stomach; for he fasted then in his Politick Capacity. When he was seated, no looking aside from Mr. _John_; not a whisper to any man, but was a disrespect to the Divine Ordinance. After the first Thunderer had spent his Lungs, no Retirement, the first is reinforc'd by a second and a third: all chosen Vessels, dieted for Preaching, and the best breath'd of the whole Country. When the Sun went down, then up went the Candles, and the fourth arises to carry on the work of the night, when that of the day was at an end.

'Tis true what he says, that our greatest Princes have often hearkened to the Addresses of their People, and have remov'd some persons from them; but it was when they found those Addresses reasonable themselves. But they who consult the manner of Addresses in former times, will find them to have been manag'd in the House of Commons, with all the calmness and circumspection imaginable. The Crimes were first maturely weigh'd, and the whole matter throughly winnow'd in Debates. After which, if they thought it necessary for the publick wellfare, that such a person should be remov'd, they dutifully acquainted the King with their opinion, which was often favourably heard; and their desires granted. But now the Case is quite otherwise; Either no Debate, or a very slight one precedes Addresses of that nature. But a man is run down with violent Harangues; and 'tis thought sufficient, if any member rises up, and offers that he will make out the Accusation afterwards: when things are carried in this heady manner, I suppose 'tis no sign of a Great Prince, to have any of his Servants forc'd from him. But such Addresses will insensibly grow into Presidents: you see our Author is nibbling at one already. And we know a House of Commons is always forgiving the Crescent in their Arms. If they gain a point, they never recede from it, they make sure work of every concession from the Crown, and immediately put it into the Christmass Box: from whence there is no Redemption.

In justification of the two Votes against lending or advancing Money to the King, he falls to railing, like a Sophister in the Schools, when his Syllogisms are at an end. He arraigns the Kings private manner of living, without considering that his not being supplied has forc'd him to it. I do not take upon me to defend any former ill management of the Treasury; but, if I am not deceiv'd, the great grievance of the other party at present, is, that it is well manag'd. And, that notwithstanding nothing has been given for so many years, yet a competent provision is still made for all expences of the publick, if not so large as might be wish'd, yet at least as much as is necessary. And I can tell my Author for his farther mortification, that at present no money is furnish'd to his Majesties Occasions, at such unconscionable Usury as he mentions. If he would have the Tables set up again, let the King be put into a condition, and then let eating and drinking flourish, according to the hearty, honest and greasie Hospitality of our Ancestors. He would have the King have recourse to Parliaments, as the only proper Supply to a King of _England_, for those things which the Treasury in this low Ebb cannot furnish out: but when he comes to the Conditions, on which this money is to be had, they are such, that perhaps forty in the Hundred to a Jew Banquer were not more unreasonable. In the mean time, if a Parliament will not give, and others must not lend, there is a certain story of the Dog in the Manger, which out of good manners I will not apply.

The Vote for not prosecuting Protestant Dissenters upon the Penal Laws; which at this time is thought to be a Grievance to the Subject, a weakning of the Protestant Religion, and an Incouragement to Popery, is a matter more tenderly to be handled. But if it be true what has been commonly reported since the Plot, that Priests, Jesuits, and Friars, mingle amongst Anabaptists, Quakers, and other Sectaries, and are their Teachers, must not they be prosecuted neither? Some men would think, that before such an uniting of Protestants, a winnowing were not much amiss; for after they were once sent together to the Mill, it would be too late to divide the Grist. His Majesty is well known to be an indulgent Prince, to the Consciences of his dissenting Subjects: But whoever has seen a Paper call'd, I think, _An intended Bill for uniting_, &c. which lay upon the Table of every Coffee-House, and was modelling to pass the House of Commons, may have found things of such dangerous concernment to the Government, as might seem not so much intended to unite Dissenters in a Protestant Church, as to draw together all the Forces of the several Fanatick Parties, against the Church of _England_. And when they were encouraged by such a Vote, which they value as a Law; (for so high that Coin is now inhaunc'd) perhaps it is not unreasonable to hold the Rod over them. But for my own part, I heartily wish, that there may be no occasion for Christians to persecute each other. And since my Author speaks with some moderation, candor, and submission to his Mother Church, I shall only desire him and the dissenting Party, to make the use they ought, of the King Gracious Disposition to them, in not yet proceeding with all the violence which the penal Laws require against them. But this calm of my Author, was too happy to last long. You find him immediately transported into a storm about the business of _Fitz-Harris_, which occasion'd the Dissolution of the Parliament at _Oxford_: and accusing, according to his sawcy Custom, both his Majesty, and the House of Lords, concerning it. As for the House of Lords, they have already vindicated their own right, by throwing out the Impeachment: and sure the People of _England_ ought to own them as the Assertors of the publick Liberty in so doing; for Process being before ordered against him at Common Law, and no particular Crime being laid to his Charge by the House of Commons, if they had admitted his Cause to be tryed before the Lordships, this would have grown a President in time, that they must have been forc'd to judge all those whom the House of Commons would thrust upon them, till at last the number of Impeachments would be so increas'd; that the Peers would have no time for any other business of the Publick: and the Highest Court of Judicature would have been reduc'd to be the Ministers of Revenge to the Commons. What then would become of our ancient Privilege to be tryed _per pares_? Which in process of time would be lost to us and our posterity: except a proviso were made on purpose, that this judgment might not be drawn into farther President; and that is never done, but when there is a manifest necessity of breaking rules, which here there was not. Otherwise the Commons may make Spaniels of the Lords, throw them a man, and bid them go judge, as we command a Dog to fetch and carry. But neither the Lords Reasons, nor the King first having possession of the Prisoner, signifie any thing with our Author. He will tell you the reason of the Impeachment was to bring out the Popish Plot. If _Fitz-Harris_ really know any thing but what relates to his own Treason, he chuses a fine time of day to discover it now, when 'tis manifestly to save his Neck, that he is forc'd to make himself a greater Villain; and to charge himself with new Crimes to avoid the punishment of the old. Had he not the benefit of so many Proclamations, to have come in before, if he then knew any thing worth discovery? And was not his fortune necessitous enough at all times, to catch at an impunity, which was baited with Rewards to bribe him? 'tis not for nothing that Party has been all along so favourable to him: they are conscious to themselves of some other matters than a Popish Plot. Let him first be tryed for what he was first accus'd: if he be acquitted, his Party will be satisfied, and their strength increas'd by the known honesty of another Evidence: but if he be condemn'd, let us see what truth will come out of him, when he has _Tyburn_ and another World before his Eyes. Then, if he confess any thing which makes against the Cause, their Excuse is ready; he died a Papist, and had a dispensation from the Pope to lie. But if they can bring him silent to the Gallows, all their favour will be, to wish him dispatch'd out of his pain, as soon as possibly he may. And in that Case they have already promis'd they will be good to his Wife, and provide for her, which would be a strong encouragement, for many a woman, to perswade her Husband to digest the Halter. This remembers me of a certain Spanish Duke, who commanding a Sea-Port-Town, set an Officer of his, underhand to rob the Merchants. His Grace you may be confident was to have the Booty, and the Fellow was assur'd if he were taken to be protected. It fell out, after some time, that he was apprehended: His Master, according to Articles, brought him off. The Rogue went again to his vocation, was the second time taken, delivered again, and so the third. At last the matter grew so notorious, that the Duke found, it would be both scandalous and difficult to protect him any longer; But the poor Malefactor sending his Wife to tell him that if he did not save him he must be hanged to morrow, and that he must confess who set him on: His Master very civilly sent him this Message; _Prithee suffer thy self to be hanged this once to do me a Courtesie, and it shall be the better for thy Wife and Children._

'But that which makes amends for all, says our Author, is the Kings resolution to have frequent Parliaments. Yet this, it seems, is no amends neither: for he says Parliaments are like Terms, if there be Ten in a Year, and all so short to near no Causes, they do no good.'

I say on the other hand, If the Courts will resolve beforehand to have no Causes brought before them, but one which they know they cannot dispatch; let the Terms be never so long, they make them as insignificant as a Vacation.

_The Kings Prerogative, when and where they should be call'd, and how long they should sit, is but subservient, as our Friend tells us, to the great design of Government; and must be accommodated to it, or we are either denyed or deluded of that Protection and Justice we are born to._

My Author is the happiest in one faculty, I ever knew. He is still advancing some new Position, which without proving, he slurs upon us for an Argument: though he knows, that Doctrines without proofs will edifie but little. That the Kings Prerogative is subservient, or in order to the ends of Government is granted him. But what strange kind of Argument is this, to prove that we are cheated of that Protection to which we are born. Our Kings have always been indued with the power of calling Parliaments, nominating the time, appointing of the Place, and Dissolving them when they thought it for the publick good: And the People have wisely consulted their own welfare in it. Suppose, for example, that there be a Jarring between the three Estates, which renders their sitting at that time Impracticable; since none of them can pretend to Judge the proceedings of the other two, the Judgment of the whole must either reside in a Superiour power, or the discord must terminate in the ruine of them all. For if one of the three incroach too far, there is so much lost in the Balance of the Estates, and so much more Arbitrary power in one; 'Tis as certain in Politiques, as in Nature; That where the Sea prevails the Land loses. If no such discord should arise, my Authors Argument is of no farther use: for where the Soveraign and Parliament agree, there can be no deluding of the People; So, that in short, his quarrel is to the constitution of the Government.