Chapter 18
_Enter_ HAMLET _and_ HORATIO (R.H.)
_Ham._ But I am very sorry, good Horatio, That to Laertes I forgot myself; For by the image of my cause,[48] I see The portraiture of his.
_Hor._ Peace! who comes here?
_Enter_ OSRIC (L.H.)
_Osr._ Your lordship is right welcome back to Denmark.
_Ham._ (C.) I humbly thank you, sir.--Dost know this water-fly?[49]
_Hor._ (R.) No, my good lord.
_Ham._ Thy state is the more gracious; for 'tis a vice to know him.
_Osr._ (L.) Sweet lord, if your lordship were at leisure, I should impart a thing to you from his majesty.
_Ham._ I will receive it, sir, with all diligence of spirit.[50] Your bonnet to his right use; 'tis for the head.
_Osr._ I thank your lordship, 'tis very hot.
_Ham._ No, believe me, 'tis very cold; the wind is northerly.
_Osr._ It is indifferent cold, my lord, indeed.
_Ham._ But yet, methinks it is very sultry and hot,[51] for my complexion,--
_Osr._ Exceedingly, my lord; it is very sultry, as 'twere,--I cannot tell how.--But, my lord, his majesty bade me signify to you, that he has laid a great wager on your head: Sir, this is the matter,--
_Ham._ I beseech you, remember----
[HAMLET _moves him to put on his hat._]
_Osr._ Nay, good my lord; for mine ease, in good faith.[52] Sir, here is newly come to court Laertes; believe me, an absolute gentleman, full of most excellent differences, of very soft society and great showing:[53] Indeed, to speak feelingly of him,[54] he is the card or calendar of gentry,[55] for you shall find in him the continent of what part a gentleman would see.[56]
_Ham._ What imports the nomination of this gentleman?[57]
_Osr._ Of Laertes?
_Ham._ Of him, sir.
_Osr._ Sir, you are not ignorant of what excellence Laertes is--
_Ham._ I dare not confess that, lest I should compare with him in excellence; but, to know a man well, were to know himself.[58]
_Osr._ I mean, sir, for his weapon.
_Ham._ What is his weapon?
_Osr._ Rapier and dagger.
_Ham._ That's two of his weapons: but, well.
_Osr._ The king, sir, hath wagered with him six Barbary horses: against the which he has imponed,[59] as I take it, six French rapiers and poignards, with their assigns, as girdle, hangers,[60] or so: Three of the carriages, in faith, are very dear to fancy, very responsive to the hilts, most delicate carriages, and of very liberal conceit.[61]
_Ham._ What call you the carriages?
_Osr._ The carriages, sir, are the hangers.
_Ham._ The phrase would be more german[62] to the matter, if we could carry cannon by our sides.
_Osr._ The king, sir, hath laid, that in a dozen passes between yourself and him, he shall not exceed you three hits; and it would come to immediate trial, if your lordship would vouchsafe the answer.[63]
_Ham._ How if I answer no?[64]
_Osr._ I mean, my lord, the opposition of your person in trial.
_Ham._ Sir, it is the breathing time of day with me; let the foils be brought, the gentleman willing, and the king hold his purpose, I will win for him if I can; if not, I will gain nothing but my shame and the odd hits.
_Osr._ Shall I deliver you so?
_Ham._ To this effect, sir; after what flourish your nature will.
_Osr._ I commend my duty to your lordship. [_Exit_, L.H.]
_Hor._ (R.) You will lose this wager, my lord.
_Ham._ (C.) I do not think so; since he went into France, I have been in continual practice; I shall win at the odds.[65] But thou wouldst not think how ill all's here about my heart: but it is no matter.
_Hor._ Nay, good my lord.
_Ham._ It is but foolery; but it is such a kind of gain-giving,[66] as would, perhaps, trouble a woman.
_Hor._ If your mind dislike any thing, obey it:[67] I will forestall their repair hither, and say, you are not fit.
_Ham._ Not a whit, we defy augury: there is a special providence in the fall of a sparrow.
[_Exeunt_, L.H.]