Chapter 2

INTRODUCTION.

In the first Part of this Work, the young Student has read, and I hope with Pleasure and Improvement, the History of this Lady, while she was known and distinguished by the Name of _Little Two-Shoes_; we are now come to a Period of her Life when that Name was discarded, and a more eminent one bestowed upon her, I mean I mean that of Mrs. _Margery Two-Shoes_: For as she was now President of the A, B, C College, it became necessary to exalt her in Title as well as in Place.

No sooner was she settled in this Office, but she laid every possible Scheme to promote the Welfare and Happiness of all her Neighbours, and especially of the Little Ones, in whom she took great Delight, and all those whose Parents could not afford to pay for their Education, she taught for nothing, but the Pleasure she had in their Company, for you are to observe, that they were very good, or were soon made so by her good Management.

CHAP. I.

_Of her School, her Ushers, or Assistants, and her Manner of Teaching._

We have already informed the Reader, that the School where she taught, was that which was before kept by Mrs. _Williams_, whose Character you may find in my _New Year's Gift_. The Room was large, and as she knew, that Nature intended Children should be always in Action, she placed her different Letters, or Alphabets, all round the School, so that every one was obliged to get up to fetch a Letter, or to spell a Word, when it came to their Turn; which not only kept them in Health, but fixed the Letters and Points firmly in their Minds.

She had the following Assistants or Ushers to help her, and I will tell you how she came by them. Mrs. _Margery_, you must know, was very humane and compassionate; and her Tenderness extended not only to all Mankind, but even to all Animals that were not noxious; as your's ought to do, if you would be happy here, and go to Heaven hereafter. These are GOD Almighty's Creatures as well as we. He made both them and us; and for wise Purposes, best known to himself, placed them in this World to live among us; so that they are our fellow Tenants of the Globe. How then can People dare to torture and wantonly destroy GOD Almighty's Creatures? They as well as you are capable of feeling Pain, and of receiving Pleasure, and how can you, who want to be made happy yourself, delight in making your fellow Creatures miserable? Do you think the poor Birds, whose Nest and young ones that wicked Boy _Dick Wilson_ ran away with Yesterday, do not feel as much Pain, as your Father and Mother would have felt, had any one pulled down their House and ran away with you? To be sure they do. Mrs. _Two-Shoes_ used to speak of those Things, and of naughty Boys throwing at Cocks, torturing Flies, and whipping Horses and Dogs, with Tears in her Eyes, and would never suffer any one to come to her School who did so.

One Day, as she was going through the next Village, she met with some wicked Boys who had got a young Raven, which they were going to throw at, she wanted to get the poor Creature out of their cruel Hands, and therefore gave them a Penny for him, and brought him home. She called his Name _Ralph_, and a fine Bird he is. Do look at him and remember what _Solomon_ says, _The Eye that despiseth his Father, and regardeth not the Distress of his Mother, the Ravens of the Valley shall peck it out, and the young Eagles eat it._ Now this Bird she taught to speak, to spell and to read; and as he was particularly fond of playing with the large Letters, the Children used to call this _Ralph_'a Alphabet.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.

He always sat at her Elbow, as you see in the first Picture, and when any of the Children were wrong, she used to call out, _Put them right Ralph_, and a fine bird he is. Do look at him.

Some Days after she had met with the Raven, as she was walking in the Fields, she saw some naughty Boys, who had taken a Pidgeon, and tied a String to its Leg, in order to let it fly, and draw it back again when they pleased; and by this Means they tortured the poor Animal with the Hopes of Liberty and repeated Disappointment. This Pidgeon she also bought, and taught him how to spell and read, though not to talk, and he performed all those extraordinary Things which are recorded of the famous Bird, that was some Time since advertised in the _Haymarket_, and visited by most of the great People in the Kingdom. This Pidgeon was a very pretty Fellow, and she called him _Tom_. See here he is.

And as the Raven _Ralph_ was fond of the large Letters, _Tom_ the Pidgeon took Care of the small ones, of which he composed this Alphabet.

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z.

The Neighbours knowing that Mrs. _Two Shoes_ was very good, as to be sure nobody was better, made her a Present of a little Sky-lark, and a fine Bird he is.

Now as many People, even at that Time had learned to lie in Bed long in the Morning, she thought the Lark might be of Use to her and her Pupils, and tell them when to get up.

_For he that is fond of his Bed, and lays 'till Noon, lives but half his Days, the rest being lost in Sleep, which is a Kind of Death_.

Some Time after this a poor Lamb had lost its Dam, and the Farmer being about to kill it, she bought it of him, and brought it home with her to play with the Children, and teach them when to go to Bed; for it was a Rule with the wise Men of that Age (and a very good one, let me tell you) to

_Rise with the Lark, and lie down with the Lamb._

This Lamb she called _Will_, and a pretty Fellow he is; do, look at him.

No sooner was _Tippy_ the Lark and _Will_ the Ba-lamb brought into the School, but that sensible Rogue _Ralph_, the Raven, composed the following Verse, which every little good Boy and Girl should get by Heart.

_Early to Bed, and early to rise; Is the Way to be healthy, and wealthy, and wise_.

A sly Rogue; but it is true enough; for those who do not go to Bed early cannot rise early; and those who do not rise early cannot do much Business. Pray, let this be told at the Court, and to People who have Routs and Rackets.

Soon after this, a Present was made to Mrs. _Margery_ of little Dog _Jumper_, and a pretty Dog he is. Pray, look at him.

_Jumper, Jumper, Jumper!_ He is always in a good Humour, and playing and jumping about, and therefore he was called _Jumper_. The Place assigned for _Jumper_ was that of keeping the Door, so that he may be called the Porter of the College, for he would let nobody go out, or any one come in, without the Leave of his Mistress. See how he sits, a saucy Rogue.

_Billy_ the Ba-lamb was a chearful Fellow, and all the Children were fond of him, wherefore Mrs. _Two-Shoes_ made it a Rule, that those who behaved best should have _Will_ home with them at Night to carry their Satchel or Basket at his Back, and bring it in the Morning. See what a fine Fellow he is, and how he trudges along.

CHAP. II.

_A Scene of Distress; in the School_.

It happened one Day, when Mrs. _Two-Shoes_ was diverting the Children after Dinner, as she usually did with some innocent Games, or entertaining and instructive Stories, that a Man arrived with the melancholy News of _Sally Jones's_ Father being thrown from his Horse, and thought past all Recovery; nay, the Messenger said, that he was seemingly dying, when he came away. Poor _Sally_ was greatly distressed, as indeed were all the School, for she dearly loved her Father, and Mrs. _Two-Shoes_, and all the Children dearly loved her. It is generally said, that we never know the real Value of our Parents or Friends till we have lost them; but poor _Sally_ felt this by Affection, and her Mistress knew it by Experience. All the School were in Tears, and the Messenger was obliged to return; but before he went, Mrs. _Two-Shoes_, unknown to the Children, ordered _Tom_ Pidgeon to go home with the Man, and bring a Letter to inform her how Mr. _Jones_ did. They set out together, and the Pidgeon rode on the Man's Head, (as you see here) for the Man was able to carry the Pidgeon, though the Pidgeon was not able to carry the Man, if he had, they would have been there much sooner, for _Tom_ Pidgeon was _very good_, and never staid on an Errand.

Soon after the Man was gone the Pidgeon was lost, and the Concern the Children were under for Mr. _Jones_ and little _Sally_ was in some Measure diverted, and Part of their Attention turned after _Tom_, who was a great Favourite, and consequently much bewailed. Mrs. _Margery_, who knew the great Use and Necessity of teaching Children to submit chearfully to the Will of Providence, bid them wipe away their Tears, and then kissing _Sally_, you must be a good Girl, says she, and depend upon GOD Almighty for his Blessing and Protection; for _he is a Father to the Fatherless, and defendeth all those who put their Trust in him_. She then told them a Story, which I shall relate in as few Words as possible.

_The History of Mr._ Lovewell, _Father to Lady_ Lucy.

Mr. _Lovewell_ was born at _Bath_, and apprenticed to a laborious Trade in _London_, which being too hard for him, he parted with his Master by Consent, and hired himself as a common Servant to a Merchant in the City. Here he spent his leisure Hours not as Servants too frequently do, in Drinking and Schemes of Pleasure, but in improving his Mind; and among other Acquirements, he made himself a complete Master of Accompts. His Sobriety, Honesty, and the Regard he paid to his Master's Interest, greatly recommended him in the whole Family, and he had several Offices of Trust committed to his Charge, in which he acquitted himself so well, that the Merchant removed him from the Stable into the Counting-house.

Here he soon made himself Master of the Business, and became so useful to the Merchant, that in regard to his faithful Services, and the Affection he had for him, he married him to his own Niece, a prudent agreeable young Lady; and gave him a Share in the Business. See what Honesty and Industry will do for us. Half the great Men in _London_, I am told, have made themselves by this Means, and who would but be honest and industrious, when it is so much our Interest and our Duty.

After some Years the Merchant died, and left Mr. _Lovewell_ possessed of many fine Ships at Sea, and much Money, and he was happy in a Wife, who had brought him a Son and two Daughters, all dutiful and obedient. The Treasures and good Things, however, of this Life are so uncertain, that a Man can never be happy, unless he lays the Foundation for it in his own Mind. So true is that Copy in our Writing Books, which tells us, that _a contented Mind is a continual Feast_.

After some Years successful Trade, he thought his Circumstances sufficient to insure his own Ships, or, in other Words, to send his Ships and Goods to Sea without being insured by others, as is customary among Merchants; when, unfortunately for him, four of them richly laden were lost at Sea. This he supported with becoming Resolution; but the next Mail brought him Advice, that nine others were taken by the _French_, with whom we were then at War; and this, together with the Failure of three foreign Merchants whom he had trusted, compleated his Ruin. He was then obliged to call his Creditors together, who took his Effects, and being angry with him for the imprudent Step of not insuring his Ships, left him destitute of all Subsistence. Nor did the Flatterers of his Fortune, those who had lived by his Bounty when in his Prosperity, pay the least Regard either to him or his Family. So true is another Copy, that you will find in your Writing Book, which says, _Misfortune tries our Friends_. All these Slights of his pretended Friends, and the ill Usage of his Creditors, both he and his Family bore with Christian Fortitude; but other Calamities fell upon him, which he felt more sensibly.

In his Distress, one of his Relations, who lived at _Florence_, offered to take his Son; and another, who lived at _Barbadoes_, sent for one of his Daughters. The Ship which his Son sailed in was cast away, and all the Crew supposed to be lost; and the Ship, in which his Daughter went a Passenger, was taken by Pirates, and one Post brought the miserable Father an Account of the Loss of his two Children. This was the severest Stroke of all: It made him compleatly wretched, and he knew it must have a dreadful Effect on his Wife and Daughter; he therefore endeavoured to conceal it from them. But the perpetual Anxiety he was in, together with the Loss of his Appetite and Want of Rest, soon alarmed his Wife. She found something was labouring in his Breast, which was concealed from her; and one Night being disturbed in a Dream, with what was ever in his Thoughts, and calling out upon his dear Children; she awoke him, and insisted upon knowing the Cause of his Inquietude. _Nothing, my Dear, nothing,_ says he, _The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away, blessed be the Name of the Lord._ This was sufficient to alarm the poor Woman; she lay till his Spirits were composed, and as she thought asleep, then stealing out of Bed, got the Keys and opened his Bureau, where she found the fatal Account. In the Height of her Distractions, she flew to her Daughter's Room, and waking her with her Shrieks, put the Letters into her Hands. The young Lady, unable to support this Load of Misery, fell into a Fit, from which it was thought she never could have been recovered. However, at last she revived; but the Shock was so great, that it entirely deprived her of her Speech.

Thus loaded with Misery, and unable to bear the Slights and Disdain of those who had formerly professed themselves Friends, this unhappy Family retired into a Country, where they were unknown, in order to hide themselves from the World; when, to support their Independency, the Father laboured as well as he could at Husbandry, and the Mother and Daughter sometimes got spinning and knitting Work, to help to furnish the Means of Subsistence; which however was so precarious and uncertain, that they often, for many Weeks together, lived on nothing but Cabbage and Bread boiled in Water. But God never forsaketh the Righteous, nor suffereth those to perish who put their Trust in him. At this Time a Lady, who was just come to England, sent to take a pleasant Seat ready furnished in that Neighbourhood, and the Person who was employed for the Purpose, was ordered to deliver a Bank Note of an hundred Pounds to Mr. _Lovewell_, another hundred to his Wife, and fifty to the Daughter, desiring them to take Possession of the House, and get it well aired against she came down, which would be in two or three Days at most. This, to People who were almost starving, was a sweet and seasonable Relief, and they were all sollicitous to know their Benefactress, but of that the Messenger himself was too ignorant to inform them. However, she came down sooner than was expected, and with Tears embraced them again and again: After which she told the Father and Mother she had heard from their Daughter, who was her Acquaintance, and that she was well and on her Return to England. This was the agreeable Subject of their Conversation till after Dinner, when drinking their Healths, she again with Tears saluted them, and falling upon her Knees asked their Blessings.

'Tis impossible to express the mutual Joy which this occasioned. Their Conversation was made up of the most endearing Expressions, intermingled with Tears and Caresses. Their Torrent of Joy, however, was for a Moment interrupted, by a Chariot which stopped at the Gate, and which brought as they thought a very unseasonable Visitor, and therefore she sent to be excused from seeing Company.

But this had no Effect, for a Gentleman richly dressed jumped out of the Chariot, and pursuing the Servant into the Parlour saluted them round, who were all astonished at his Behaviour. But when the Tears trickled from his Cheeks, the Daughter, who had been some Years dumb, immediately cried out, _my Brother! my Brother! my Brother!_ and from that Instant recovered her Speech. The mutual Joy which this occasioned, is better felt than expressed. Those who have proper Sentiments of Humanity, Gratitude, and filial Piety will rejoice at the Event, and those who have a proper Idea of the Goodness of God, and his gracious Providence, will from this, as well as other Instances of his Goodness and Mercy, glorify his holy Name, and magnify his Wisdom and Power, who is a Shield to the Righteous, and defendeth all those who put their Trust in him.

As you, my dear Children, may be sollicitous to know how this happy Event was brought about, I must inform you, that Mr. _Lovewell_'s Son, when the Ship foundered, had with some others got into the long Boat, and was taken up by a Ship at Sea, and carried to the East Indies, where in a little Time he made a large Fortune; and the Pirates who took his Daughter, attempted to rob her of her Chastity; but finding her Inflexible, and determined to die rather than to submit, some of them behaved to her in a very cruel Manner; but others, who had more Honour and Generosity, became her Defenders; upon which a Quarrel arose between them, and the Captain, who was the worst of the Gang, being killed, the rest of the Crew carried the Ship into a Port of the _Manilla_ Islands, belonging to the _Spaniards_; where, when her Story was known, she was treated with great Respect, and courted by a young Gentleman, who was taken ill of a Fever, and died before the Marriage was agreed on, but left her his whole Fortune.

You see, my dear _Sally_, how wonderfully these People were preserved, and made happy after such extreme Distress; we are therefore never to despair, even under the greatest Misfortunes, for GOD Almighty is All-powerful and can deliver us at any Time. Remember _Job_, but I think you have not read so far, take the Bible, _Billy Jones_, and read the History of that good and patient Man. At this Instant something was heard to slap at the Window, _Wow, wow, wow_, says Jumper, and attempted to leap up and open the Door, at which the Children were surprized; but Mrs. _Margery_ knowing what it was, opened the Casement, as _Noah_ did the Window of the Ark, and drew in _Tom_ Pidgeon with a Letter, and see here he is.

As soon as he was placed on the Table, he walked up to little _Sally_, and dropping the Letter, cried, _Co, Co, Coo_, as much as to say, _there read it_. Now this poor Pidgeon had travelled fifty Miles in about an Hour, to bring _Sally_ this Letter, and who would destroy such pretty Creatures.--But let us read the Letter.

_My dear_ Sally,

GOD Almighty has been very merciful, and restored your Pappa to us again, who is now so well as to be able to sit up. I hear you are a good Girl, my Dear, and I hope you will never forget to praise the Lord for this his great Goodness and Mercy to us--What a sad Thing it would have been if your Father had died, and left both you and me, and little _Tommy_ in Distress, and without a Friend: Your Father sends his Blessing with mine--Be good, my dear Child, and God Almighty will also bless you, whose Blessing is above all Things.

_I am, my Dear Sally_,

_Your ever affectionate Mother,_

MARTHA JONES.

CHAP. III.

_Of the amazing Sagacity and Instincts of a little Dog_.

Soon after this, a dreadful Accident happened in the School. It was on a _Thursday_ Morning, I very well remember, when the Children having learned their Lessons soon, she had given them Leave to play, and they were all running about the School, and diverting themselves with the Birds and the Lamb; at this Time the Dog, all of a sudden, laid hold of his Mistress's Apron, and endeavoured to pull her out of the School. She was at first surprized, however, she followed him to see what he intended. No sooner had he led her into the Garden, but he ran back, and pulled out one of the Children in the same manner; upon which she ordered them all to leave the School immediately, and they had not been out five Minutes, before the Top of the House fell in. What a miraculous Deliverance was here! How gracious! How good was God Almighty, to save all these Children from Destruction, and to make Use of such an Instrument, as a little sagacious Animal to accomplish his Divine Will. I should have observed, that as soon as they were all in the Garden, the Dog came leaping round them to express his Joy, and when the House was fallen, laid himself down quietly by his Mistress.

Some of the Neighbours, who saw the School fall, and who were in great Pain for _Margery_ and the little ones, soon spread the News through the Village, and all the Parents, terrified for their Children, came crowding in Abundance; they had, however, the Satisfaction to find them all safe, and upon their Knees, with their Mistress, giving God thanks for their happy Deliverance.

ADVICE _from the_ MAN _in the_ MOON.

_Jumper, Jumper, Jumper_, what a pretty Dog he is, and how sensible? Had Mankind half the Sagacity of _Jumper_, they would guard against Accidents of this Sort, by having a public Survey, occasionally made of all the Houses in every Parish (especially of those, which are old and decayed) and not suffer them to remain in a crazy State, 'till they fall down on the Heads of the poor Inhabitants, and crush them to Death. Why, it was but Yesterday, that a whole House fell down in _Grace-church-street_, and another in _Queen's-street_, and an hundred more are to tumble, before this Time twelve Months; so Friends, take Care of yourselves, and tell the Legislature, they ought to take Care for you. How can you be so careless? Most of your Evils arise from Carelesness and Extravagance, and yet you excuse yourselves, and lay the Fault upon Fortune. Fortune is a Fool, and you are a Blockhead, if you put it in her Power to play Tricks with you.

_Yours_,

_The_ MAN _in the_ MOON.

You are not to wonder, my dear Reader, that this little Dog should have more Sense than you, or your Father, or your Grandfather.

Though God Almighty has made Man the Lord of the Creation, and endowed him with Reason, yet in many Respects, he has been altogether as bountiful to other Creatures of his forming. Some of the Senses of other Animals are more acute than ours, as we find by daily Experience. You know this little Bird, _sweet Jug, Jug, Jug_, 'tis a Nightingale. This little Creature, after she has entertained us with her Songs all the Spring, and bred up her little ones, flies into a foreign Country, and finds her Way over the Great Sea, without any of the Instruments and Helps which Men are obliged to make Use of for that Purpose. Was you as wise as the Nightingale, you might make all the Sailors happy, and have twenty thousand Pounds for teaching them the Longitude.

You would not think _Ralph_ the Raven half so wise and so good as he is, though you see him here reading his book. Yet when the Prophet _Elijah_, was obliged to fly from _Ahab_ King of _Israel_, and hide himself in a Cave, the Ravens, at the Command of God Almighty, fed him every Day, and preserved his Life.

_And the Word of the Lord came unto _Elijah_, saying, Hide thyself by the Brook _Cherith_, that is before _Jordan_, and I have commanded the Ravens to feed thee there. And the Ravens brought him Bread and Flesh in the Morning, and Bread and Flesh in the Evening, and he drank of the Brook,_ Kings, B.I.C. 17.

And the pretty Pidgeon when the World was drowned, and he was confined with _Noah_ in the Ark, was sent forth by him to see whether the Waters were abated, _And he sent forth a Dove from him, to see if the Waters were abated from off the Face of the Ground. And the Dove came in to him in the Evening, and lo, in her Mouth was an Olive Leaf plucked off: So_ Noah _knew that the Waters were abated from off the Earth._ Gen. viii. 8. 11.

As these, and other Animals, are so sensible and kind to us, we ought to be tender and good to them, and not beat them about, and kill them, and take away their young ones, as many wicked Boys do. Does not the Horse and the Ass carry you and your burthens; don't the Ox plough your Ground, the Cow give you Milk, the Sheep cloath your Back, the Dog watch your House, the Goose find you in Quills to write with, the Hen bring Eggs for your Custards and Puddings, and the Cock call you up in the Morning, when you are lazy, and like to hurt yourselves by laying too long in Bed? If so, how can you be so cruel to them, and abuse God Almighty's good Creatures? Go, naughty Boy, go; be sorry for what you have done, and do so no more, that God Almighty may forgive you. _Amen_, say I, again and again. God will bless you, but not unless you are merciful and good.

The downfal of the School, was a great Misfortune to Mrs. _Margery_; for she not only lost all her Books, but was destitute of a Place to teach in; but Sir William _Dove_, being informed of this, ordered the House to be built at his own Expence, and 'till that could be done, Farmer _Grove_ was so kind, as to let her have his large Hall to teach in.

The House built by Sir _William_, had a Statue erected over the Door of a Boy sliding on the Ice, and under it were these Lines, written by Mrs. _Two-Shoes_, and engraved at her Expence.

On SIN. A SIMILE.

As a poor Urchin on the Ice, When he has tumbl'd once or twice, With cautious Step, and trembling goes, The drop-stile Pendant on his Nose, And trudges on to seek the Shore, Resolv'd to trust the Ice no more: But meeting with a daring Mate, Who often us'd to slide and scate, Again is into Danger led, And falls again, and breaks his head. So Youth when first they're drawn to sin, And see the Danger they are in, Would gladly quit the thorney Way, And think it is unsafe to stay; But meeting with their wicked Train, Return with them to sin again: With them the Paths of Vice explore; With them are ruin'd ever more.

CHAP. IV.

_What happened at Farmer Grove's; and how she gratified him for the Use of his Room_.

While at Mr. _Grove's_, which was in the Heart of the Village, she not only taught the Children in the Day Time, but the Farmer's Servants, and all the Neighbours, to read and write in the Evening; and it was a constant Practice before they went away, to make them all go to Prayers, and sing Psalms. By this Means, the People grew extremely regular, his Servants were always at Home, instead of being at the Ale-house, and he had more Work done than ever. This gave not only Mr. _Grove_, but all the Neighbours, an high Opinion of her good Sense and prudent Behaviour: And she was so much esteemed, that most of the Differences in the Parish were left to her Decision; and if a Man and Wife quarrelled (which sometimes happened in that Part of the Kingdom) both Parties certainly came to her for Advice. Every Body knows, that _Martha Wilson_ was a passionate scolding Jade, and that _John_ her husband, was a surly ill-tempered Fellow. These were one Day brought by the Neighbours for _Margery_ to talk to them, when they fairly quarrelled before her, and were going to Blows; but she stepping between them, thus addressed the Husband; _John_, says she, you are a Man, and ought to have more Sense than to fly in a Passion, at every Word that is said amiss by your Wife; and _Martha_, says she, you ought to know your Duty better, than to say any Thing to aggravate your Husband's Resentment. These frequent Quarrels, arise from the Indulgence of your violent Passions; for I know, you both love one another, notwithstanding what has passed between you. Now, pray tell me _John_, and tell me _Martha_, when you have had a Quarrel the other Night, are you not both sorry for it the next Day? They both declared that they were: Why then, says she, I'll tell you how to prevent this for the future, if you will both promise to take my Advice. They both promised her. You know, says she, that a small Spark will set Fire to Tinder, and that Tinder properly placed will fire a House; an angry Word is with you as that Spark, for you are both as touchy as Tinder, and very often make your own House too hot to hold you. To prevent this, therefore, and to live happily for the future, you must solemnly agree, that if one speaks an angry Word, the other will not answer, 'till he or she has distinctly called over all the Letters in the Alphabet, and the other not reply, 'till he has told twenty; by this Means your Passions will be stifled, and Reason will have Time to take the Rule.

This is the best Recipe that was ever given for a married Couple to live in Peace: Though _John_ and his Wife frequently attempted to quarrel afterwards, they never could get their Passions to any considerable Height, for there was something so droll in thus carrying on the Dispute, that before they got to the End of the Argument, they saw the Absurdity of it, laughed, kissed, and were Friends.

Just as Mrs. _Margery_ had settled this Difference between _John_ and his Wife, the Children (who had been sent out to play, while that Business was transacting) returned some in Tears, and others very disconsolate, for the Loss of a little Dormouse they were very fond of, and which was just dead. Mrs. _Margery_, who had the Art of moralizing and drawing Instructions from every Accident, took this Opportunity of reading them a Lecture on the Uncertainty of Life, and the Necessity of being always prepared for Death. You should get up in the Morning, says she, and to conduct yourselves, as if that Day was to be your last, and lie down at Night, as if you never expected to see this World any more. This may be done, says she, without abating of your Chearfulness, for you are not to consider Death as an Evil, but as a Convenience, as an useful Pilot, who is to convey you to a Place of greater Happiness: Therefore, play my dear Children, and be merry; but be innocent and good. The good Man sets Death at Defiance, for his Darts are only dreadful to the Wicked.

After this, she permitted the Children to bury the little Dormouse, and desired one of them to write his Epitaph, and here it is.

_Epitaph on a_ DORMOUSE, _really written by a little_ BOY.

I.

In Paper Case, Hard by this Place, Dead a poor Dormouse lies; And soon or late, Summon'd by Fate, Each Prince, each Monarch dies.

II.

Ye Sons of Verse, While I rehearse, Attend instructive Rhyme; No Sins had _Dor_, To answer for, Repent of yours in Time.

CHAP. V.

_The whole History of the Considering Cap, set forth at large for the Benefit of all whom it may concern_.

The great Reputation Mrs. _Margery_ acquired by composing Differences in Families, and especially, between Man and Wife, induced her to cultivate that Part of her System of Morality and Economy, in order to render it more extensively useful. For this Purpose, she contrived what she called a Charm for the Passions; which was a considering Cap, almost as large as a Grenadier's, but of three equal Sides; on the first of which was written, I MAY BE WRONG; on the second, IT IS FIFTY TO ONE BUT YOU ARE; and on the third, I'LL CONSIDER OF IT. The other Parts on the out-side, were filled with odd Characters, as unintelligible as the Writings of the old _Egyptians_; but within Side there was a Direction for its Use, of the utmost Consequence; for it strictly enjoined the Possessor to put on the Cap, whenever he found his Passions begin to grow turbulent, and not to deliver a Word whilst it was on, but with great Coolness and Moderation. As this Cap was an universal Cure for Wrong-headedness, and prevented numberless Disputes and Quarrels, it greatly hurt the Trade of the poor Lawyers, but was of the utmost Service to the rest of the Community. They were bought by Husbands and Wives, who had themselves frequent Occasion for them, and sometimes lent them to their Children: They were also purchased in large Quantities by Masters and Servants; by young Folks, who were intent on Matrimony, by Judges, Jurymen, and even Physicians and Divines; nay, if we may believe History, the Legislators of the Land did not disdain the Use of them; and we are told, that when any important Debate arose, _Cap, was the Word_, and each House looked like a grand Synod of _Egyptian_ Priests. Nor was this Cap of less Use to Partners in Trade, for with these, as well as with Husband and Wife, if one was out of Humour, the other threw him the Cap, and he was obliged to put it on, and keep it till all was quiet. I myself saw thirteen Caps worn at a Time in one Family, which could not have subsisted an Hour without them; and I was particularly pleased at Sir _Humphry Huffum's_, to hear a little Girl, when her Father was out of Humour, ask her Mamma, _if she should reach down the Cap_? These Caps, indeed, were of such Utility, that People of Sense never went without them; and it was common in the Country, when a Booby made his Appearance, and talked Nonsense, to say, _he had no Cap in his Pocket_.

_Advice from FRIAR BACON._

What was _Fortunatus_'s Wishing Cap, when compared to this? That Cap, is said to have conveyed People instantly from one Place to another; but, as the Change of Place does not change the Temper and Disposition of the Mind, little Benefit can be expected from it; nor indeed is much to be hoped from his famous Purse: That Purse, it is said, was never empty, and such a Purse, may be sometimes convenient; but as Money will not purchase Peace, it is not necessary for a Man to encumber himself with a great deal of it. Peace and Happiness depend so much upon the State of a Man's own Mind, and upon the Use of the considering Cap, that it is generally his own Fault, if he is miserable. One of these Caps will last a Man his whole Life, and is a Discovery of much greater Importance to the Public than the Philosopher's Stone. Remember what was said by my Brazen Head, _Time is, Time was, Time is past_: Now the _Time is_, therefore buy the Cap immediately, and make a proper Use of it, and be happy before the _Time is past_.

_Yours_ ROGER BACON.

CHAP. VI.

_How Mrs._ MARGERY _was taken up for a Witch, and what happened on that Occasion._

And so it is true? And they have taken up Mrs. _Margery_ then, and accused her of being a Witch, only because she was wiser than some of her Neighbours! Mercy upon me! People stuff Children's Heads with Stories of Ghosts, Fairies, Witches, and such Nonsense when they are young, and so they continue Fools all their Days. The whole World ought to be made acquainted with her Case, and here it is at their Service.

_The Case of Mrs._ MARGERY.

Mrs. _Margery_, as we have frequently observed, was always doing Good, and thought she could never sufficiently gratify those who had done any Thing to serve her. These generous Sentiments, naturally led her to consult the Interest of Mr. _Grove_, and the rest of her Neighbours; and as most of their Lands were Meadow, and they depended much on their Hay, which had been for many Years greatly damaged by wet Weather, she contrived an Instrument to direct them when to mow their Grass with Safety, and prevent their Hay being spoiled. They all came to her for Advice, and by that Means got in their Hay without Damage, while most of that in the neighbouring Villages was spoiled.

This made a great Noise in the Country, and so provoked were the People in the other Parishes, that they accused her of being a Witch, and sent Gasser _Goosecap_, a busy Fellow in other People's Concerns, to find out Evidence against her. This Wiseacre happened to come to her School, when she was walking about with the Raven on one Shoulder, the Pidgeon on the other, the Lark on her Hand, and the Lamb and the Dog by her Side; which indeed made a droll Figure, and so surprized the that he cried out, a Witch! a Witch! upon this she laughing, answered, a Conjurer! a Conjurer! and so they parted; but it did not end thus, for a Warrant was issued out against Mrs. _Margery_, and she was carried to a Meeting of the Justices, whither all the Neighbours followed her.

At the Meeting, one of the Justices, who knew little of Life, and less of the Law, behaved very idly; and though no Body was able to prove any Thing against her, asked, who she could bring to her Character? _Who_ can you bring against my Character, Sir, says she, there are People enough who would appear in my Defence, were it necessary; but I never supposed that any one here could be so weak, as to believe there was any such Thing as a Witch. If I am a Witch, this is my Charm, and (laying a Barometer or Weather Glass on the Table) it is with this, says she, that I have taught my Neighbours to know the State of the Weather. All the Company laughed, and Sir _William Dove_, who was on the Bench, asked her Accusers, how they could be such Fools, as to think there was any such Thing as a Witch. It is true, continued he, many innocent and worthy People have been abused and even murdered on this absurd and foolish Supposition; which is a Scandal to our Religion, to our Laws, to our Nation, and to common Sense; but I will tell you a Story.

There was in the West of _England_ a poor industrious Woman, who laboured under the same evil Report, which this good Woman is accused of. Every Hog that died with the Murrain, every Cow that slipt her Calf, she was accountable for: If a Horse had the Staggers, she was supposed to be in his Head; and whenever the Wind blew a little harder than ordinary, _Goody Giles_ was playing her Tricks, and riding upon a Broomstick in the Air. These, and a thousand other Phantasies, too ridiculous to recite, possessed the Pates of the common People: Horse-shoes were nailed with the Heels upwards, and many Tricks made use of, to mortify the poor Creature; and such was their Rage against her, that they petitioned Mr. _Williams_, the Parson of the Parish, not to let her come to Church; and at last, even insisted upon it: But this he over-ruled, and allowed the poor old Woman a Nook in one of the Isles to herself, where she muttered over her Prayers in the best Manner she could. The Parish, thus disconcerted and enraged, withdrew the small Pittance they allowed for her Support, and would have reduced her to the Necessity of starving, had she not been still assisted by the benevolent Mr. _Williams_.

But I hasten to the Sequel of my Story, in which you will find, that the true Source from whence Witchcraft springs is _Poverty_, _Age_, and _Ignorance_; and that it is impossible for a Woman to pass for a Witch, unless she is _very poor_, _very old_, and lives in a Neighbourhood where the People are _void of common Sense_.

Some Time after, a Brother of her's died in _London_, who, though he would not part with a Farthing while he lived, at his Death was obliged to leave her five thousand Pounds, that he could not carry with him.--This altered the Face of _Jane_'s Affairs prodigiously: She was no longer _Jane_, alias _Joan Giles_, the ugly old Witch, but Madam _Giles_; her old ragged Garb was exchanged for one that was new and genteel; her greatest Enemies made their Court to her, even the Justice himself came to wish her Joy; and though several Hogs and Horses died, and the Wind frequently blew afterwards, yet Madam _Giles_ was never supposed to have a Hand in it; and from hence it is plain, as I observed before, that a Woman must be _very poor, very old_, and live in a Neighbourhood, where the People are _very stupid_, before she can possibly pass for a Witch.

'Twas a Saying of Mr. _Williams_, who would sometimes be jocose, and had the Art of making even Satire agreeable; that if ever _Jane_ deserved the Character of a Witch, it was after this Money was left her; for that with her five thousand Pounds, she did more Acts of Charity and friendly Offices, than all the People of Fortune within fifty Miles of the Place.

After this, Sir _William_ inveighed against the absurd and foolish Notions, which the Country People had imbibed concerning Witches, and Witchcraft, and having proved that there was no such Thing, but that all were the Effects of Folly and Ignorance, he gave the Court such an Account of Mrs. _Margery_, and her Virtue, good Sense, and prudent Behaviour, that the Gentlemen present were enamoured with her, and returned her public Thanks for the great Service she had done the Country. One Gentleman in particular, I mean Sir _Charles Jones_, had conceived such an high Opinion of her, that he offered her a considerable Sum to take the Care of his Family, and the Education of his Daughter, which, however, she refused; but this Gentleman, sending for her afterwards when he had a dangerous Fit of Illness, she went, and behaved so prudently in the Family, and so tenderly to him and his Daughter, that he would not permit her to leave his House, but soon after made her Proposals of Marriage. She was truly sensible of the Honour he intended her, but, though poor, she would not consent to be made a Lady, till he had effectually provided for his Daughter; for she told him, that Power was a dangerous Thing to be trusted with, and that a good Man or Woman would never throw themselves into the Road of Temptation.

All Things being settled, and the Day fixed, the Neighbours came in Crouds to see the Wedding; for they were all glad, that one who had been such a good little Girl, and was become such a virtuous and good Woman, was going to be made a Lady; but just as the Clergyman had opened his Book, a Gentleman richly dressed ran into the Church, and cry'd, Stop! stop! This greatly alarmed the Congregation, particularly the intended Bride and Bridegroom, whom he first accosted, and desired to speak with them apart. After they had been talking some little Time, the People were greatly surprized to see Sir _Charles_ stand Motionless, and his Bride cry, and faint away in the Stranger's Arms. This seeming Grief, however, was only a Prelude to a Flood of Joy, which immediately succeeded; for you must know, gentle Reader, that this Gentleman, so richly dressed and bedizened with Lace, was that identical little Boy, whom you before saw in the Sailor's Habit; in short, it was little _Tom Two Shoes_, Mrs. _Margery's_ Brother, who was just come from beyond Sea, where he had made a large Fortune, and hearing, as soon as he landed, of his Sister's intended Wedding, had rode Post, to see that a proper Settlement was made on her; which he thought she was now intitled to, as he himself was both able and willing to give her an ample Fortune. They soon returned to the Communion-Table, and were married in Tears, but they were Tears of Joy.

There is something wonderful in this young Gentleman's Preservation and Success in Life; which we shall acquaint the Reader of, in the History of his Life and Adventures, which will soon be published.

CHAP. VII. and Last.

_The true Use of Riches._

The Harmony and Affection that subsisted between this happy Couple, is inexpressible; but Time, which dissolves the closest Union, after six Years, severed Sir _Charles_ from his Lady; for being seized with a violent Fever he died, and left her full of Grief, tho' possessed of a large Fortune.

We forgot to remark, that after her Marriage, _Lady Jones_ (for so we must now call her) ordered the Chappel to be fitted up, and allowed the Chaplain a considerable Sum out of her own private Purse, to visit the Sick, and say Prayers every Day to all the People that could attend. She also gave Mr. _Johnson_ ten Guineas a Year, to preach a Sermon, annually, on the Necessity and Duties of the marriage State, and on the Decease of Sir _Charles_; she gave him ten more, to preach yearly on the Subject of Death; she had put all the Parish into Mourning for the Loss of her Husband; and to those Men who attended this yearly Service, she gave Harvest Gloves, to their Wives Shoes and Stockings, and to all the Children little Books and Plumb-cakes: We must also observe, that she herself wove a Chaplet of Flowers, and before the Service, placed it on his Grave-stone; and a suitable Psalm was always sung by the Congregation.

About this Time, she heard that Mr. _Smith_ was oppressed by Sir Timothy Gripe_, the Justice, and his Friend _Graspall_, who endeavoured to deprive him of Part of his Tythes; upon which she, in Conjunction with her Brother, defended him, and the Cause was tried in _Westminster-hall_, where Mr. _Smith_ gained a Verdict; and it appearing that Sir _Timothy_ had behaved most scandalously, as a Justice of the Peace, he was struck off the List, and no longer permitted to act in that Capacity. This was a Cut to a Man of his imperious Disposition, and this was followed by one yet more severe; for a Relation of his, who had an undoubted Right to the _Mouldwell_ Estate, finding that it was possible to get the better at Law of a rich Man, laid Claim to it, brought his Action, and recovered the whole Manor of _Mouldwell_, and being afterwards inclined to sell it, he, in Consideration of the Aid Lady _Margery_ had lent him during his Distress, made her the first Offer, and she purchased the Whole, and threw it into different Farms, that the Poor might be no longer under the Dominion of two over-grown Men.

This was a great Mortification to Sir _Timothy_, as well as to his Friend _Graspall_, who from this Time experienced nothing but Misfortunes, and was in a few Years so dispossessed of his Ill-gotten Wealth, that his Family were reduced to seek Subsistance from the Parish, at which those who had felt the Weight of his Iron Hand rejoiced; but Lady _Margery_ desired, that his Children might be treated with Care and Tenderness; _for they_, says she, _are no Ways accountable for the Actions of their Father_.

At her first coming into Power, she took Care to gratify her old Friends, especially Mr. and Mrs. _Smith_, whose Family she made happy.--She paid great Regard to the Poor, made their Interest her own, and to induce them to come regularly to Church, she ordered a Loaf, or the Price of a Loaf, to be given to every one who would accept of it. This brought many of them to Church, who by degrees learned their Duty, and then came on a more noble Principle. She also took Care to encourage Matrimony; and in order to induce her Tenants and Neighbours to enter into that happy State, she always gave the young Couple something towards House-keeping; and stood Godmother to all their Children, whom she had in Parties, every _Sunday_ Evening, to teach them their Catechism, and lecture them in Religion and Morality; after which she treated them with a Supper, gave them such Books as they wanted, and then dispatched them with her Blessing. Nor did she forget them at her Death, but left each a Legacy, as will be seen among other charitable Donations when we publish her Will, which we may do in some future Volume. There is one Request however so singular, that we cannot help taking some Notice of it in this Place; which is, that of her giving so many Acres of Land to be planted yearly with Potatoes, for all the Poor of any Parish who would come and fetch them for the Use of their Families; but if any took them to sell they were deprived of that Privilege ever after. And these Roots were planted and raised from the Rent arising from a Farm which she had assigned over for that purpose. In short, she was a Mother to the Poor, a Physician to the Sick, and a Friend to all who were in Distress. Her Life was the greatest Blessing, and her Death the greatest Calamity that ever was felt in the Neighbourhood. A Monument, but without Inscription, was erected to her Memory in the Church-yard, over which the Poor as they pass weep continually, so that the Stone is ever bathed in Tears.

On this Occasion the following Lines were spoken extempore by a young Gentleman.

_How vain the Tears that fall from you, And here supply the Place of Dew? How vain to weep the happy Dead, Who now to heavenly Realms are fled? Repine no more, your Plaints forbear, And all prepare to meet them there._

The END.

APPENDIX.

_The_ GOLDEN DREAM; _or, the_ INGENUOUS CONFESSION.

To shew the Depravity of human Nature, and how apt the Mind is to be misled by Trinkets and false Appearances, Mrs. _Two-Shoes_ does acknowledge, that after she became rich, she had like to have been too fond of Money; for on seeing her Husband receive a very large Sum, her Heart went pit pat, pit pat, all the Evening, and she began to think that Guineas were pretty Things. To suppress this Turbulence of Mind, which was a Symptom of approaching Avarice, she said her Prayers earlier than usual, and at Night had the following Dream; which I shall relate in her own Words.

"Methought, as I slept, a Genii stept up to me with a _French_ Commode, which having placed on my Head, he said, now go and be happy; for from henceforth every Thing you touch shall turn to Gold. Willing to try the Experiment, I gently touched the Bed-post and Furniture, which immediately became massy Gold burnished, and of surprizing Brightness. I then touched the Walls of the House, which assumed the same Appearance, and looked amazingly magnificent. Elated with this wonderful Gift, I rang hastily for my Maid to carry the joyful News to her Master, who, as I thought, was then walking in the Garden. _Sukey_ came, but in the Extacy I was in, happening to touch her Hand, she became instantly an immovable Statue. Go, said I, and call your Master; but she made no reply, nor could she stir. Upon this I shrieked, and in came my dear Husband, whom I ran to embrace; when no sooner had I touched him, but he became good for nothing; that is, good for nothing but his Weight in Gold; and that you know could be nothing, where Gold was so plenty. At this instant up came another Servant with a Glass of Water, thinking me ill; this I attempted to swallow, but no sooner did it touch my Mouth, than it became a hard solid Body, and unfit for drinking. My Distress now grew insupportable! I had destroyed, as I thought, my dear Husband, and my favourite Servant; and I plainly perceived, that I should die for want in the midst of so much Wealth. Ah, said I, why did I long for Riches! Having enough already, why did I covet more? Thus terrified, I began to rave, and beat my Breast, which awaked Sir _Charles_, who kindly called me from this State of Inquietude, and composed my Mind."

This Scene I have often considered as a Lesson, instructing me, that a Load of Riches bring, instead of Felicity, a Load of Troubles; and that the only Source of Happiness is _Contentment_. Go, therefore, you who have too much, and give it to those who are in want; so shall you be happy yourselves, by making others happy. This is a Precept from the Almighty, a Precept which must be regarded; for _The Lord is about your Paths, and about your Bed, and spieth out all your Ways_.

_An Anecdote, respecting_ TOM TWO-SHOES, _communicated by a Gentleman, who is now writing the History of his Life._

It is generally known, that _Tom Two-Shoes_ went to Sea when he was a very little Boy, and very poor; and that he returned a very great Man, and very rich; but no one knows how he acquired so much Wealth but myself, and a few Friends, who have perused the Papers from which I am compiling the History of his Life.

After _Tom_ had been at Sea some Years, he was unfortunately cast away, on that Part of the Coast of _Africa_ inhabited by the _Hottentots_. Here he met with a strange Book, which the _Hottentots_ did not understand, and which gave him some Account of _Prester John's_ Country; and being a Lad of great Curiosity and Resolution he determined to see it; accordingly he set out on the Pursuit, attended by a young Lion, which he had tamed and made so fond of him, that he followed him like a Dog, and obeyed all his Commands; and indeed it was happy for him that he had such a Companion; for as his Road lay through large Woods and Forests, that were full of wild Beasts and without Inhabitants, he must have been soon starved or torn in Pieces, had he not been both fed and protected by this noble Animal.

_Tom_ had provided himself with two Guns, a Sword, and as much Powder and Ball as he could carry; with these Arms, and such a Companion, it was mighty easy for him to get Food; for the Animals in these wild and extensive Forests, having never seen the Effects of a Gun, readily ran from the Lion, who hunted on one Side, to _Tom_, who hunted on the other, so that they were either caught by the Lion, or shot by his Master; and it was pleasant enough, after a hunting Match, and the Meat was dressed, to see how Cheek by Joul they sat down to Dinner.

When they came info the Land of _Utopia_, he discovered the Statue of a Man created on an open Plain, which had this Inscription on the Pedestal: _On_ May-day _in the Morning, when the Sun rises, I shall have a Head of Gold_. As it was now the latter End of _April_, he stayed to see this wonderful Change; and in the mean time, enquiring of a poor Shepherd what was the Reason of the Statue being erected there, and with that Inscription, he was informed, that it was set up many Years ago by an _Arabian_ Philosopher, who travelled all the World over in Search of a real Friend; that he lived with, and was extremely fond of a great Man who inhabited the next Mountain; but that on some Occasion they quarrelled, and the Philosopher, leaving the Mountain, retired into the Plain, where he erected this Statue with his own Hands, and soon after died. To this he added, that all the People for many Leagues round came there every _May_ Morning, expecting to see the Stone-head turned to Gold.

_Tom_ got up very early on the first of _May_ to behold this amazing Change, and when he came near the Statue he saw a Number of People, who all ran away from him in the utmost Consternation, having never before seen a Lion follow a Man like a Lap-dog. Being thus left alone, he fixed his Eyes on the Sun, then rising with resplendent Majesty, and afterwards turned to the Statue, but could see no Change in the Stone.--Surely, says he to himself, there is some mystical Meaning in this! This Inscription must be an Ænigma, the hidden Meaning of which I will endeavour to find; for a Philosopher would never expect a Stone to be turned to Gold; accordingly he measured the Length of the Shadow, which the Statue gave on the Ground by the Sun shining on it, and marked that particular Part where the Head fell, then getting a _Chopness_ (a Thing like a Spade) and digging, he discovered a Copper-chest, full of Gold, with this Inscription engraved on the Lid of it.

Thy WIT, Oh Man! whoever thou art, Hath disclos'd the Ænigma, And discover'd the GOLDEN HEAD. Take it and use it, But use it with WISDOM; For know, That GOLD, properly employ'd, May dispense Blessings, And promote the Happiness of Morals; But when hoarded up, Or misapply'd, Is but Trash, that makes Mankind miserable. Remember The unprofitable Servant, Who hid his _Talent_ in a Napkin; And The profligate Son, Who squander'd away his Substance and fed with the Swine. As thou hast got the GOLDEN HEAD, Observe the _Golden Mean_, Be _Good_ and be happy.

This Lesson, coming as it were from the Dead, struck him with such Awe, and Reverence for Piety and Virtue, that, before he removed the Treasure, he kneeled down, and earnestly and fervently prayed that he might make a prudent, just and proper Use of it. He then conveyed the Chest away; but how he got it to _England_, the Reader will be informed in the History of his Life. It may not be improper, however, in this Place, to give the Reader some Account of the Philosopher who hid this Treasure, and took so much Pains to find a true and real Friend to enjoy it. As _Tom_ had Reason to venerate his Memory, he was very particular in his Enquiry, and had this Character of him;--that he was a Man well acquainted with Nature and with Trade; that he was pious, friendly, and of a sweet and affable Disposition. That he had acquired a Fortune by Commerce, and having no Relations to leave it to, he travelled through _Arabia, Persia, India, Libia_ and _Utopia_ in search of a real Friend. In this Pursuit he found several with whom he exchanged good Offices, and that were polite and obliging, but they often flew off for Trifles; or as soon as he pretended to be in Distress, and requested their Assistance, left him to struggle with his own Difficulties. So true is that Copy in our Books, which says, _Adversity is the Touchstone of Friendship_. At last, however, he met with the _Utopian_ Philosopher, or the wise Man of the Mountain, as he is called, and thought in him he had found the Friend he wanted; for though he often pretended to be in Distress, and abandoned to the Frowns of Fortune, this Man always relieved him, and with such Chearfulness and Sincerity, that concluding he had found out the only Man to whom he ought to open both his Purse and his Heart, he let him so far into his Secrets, as to desire his Assistance in hiding a large Sum of Money, which he wanted to conceal, lest the Prince of the Country, who was absolute, should, by the Advice of his wicked Minister, put him to Death for his Gold. The two Philosophers met and hid the Money, which the Stranger, after some Days, went to see, but found it gone. How was he struck to the Heart, when he found that his Friend, whom he had often tried, and who had relieved him in his Distress, could not withstand this Temptation, but broke through the sacred Bonds of Friendship, and turned even a Thief for Gold which he did not want, as he was already very rich. Oh! said he, what is the Heart of Man made of? Why am I condemned to live among People who have no Sincerity, and who barter the most sacred Ties of Friendship and Humanity for the Dirt that we tread on? Had I lost my Gold and found a real Friend, I should have been happy with the Exchange, but now I am most miserable. After some Time he wiped off his Tears, and being determined not to be so imposed on, he had Recourse to Cunning and the Arts of Life. He went to his pretended Friend with a chearful Countenance, told him he had more Gold to hide, and desired him to appoint a Time when they might go together, and open the Earth to put it into the same Pot; the other, in Hopes of getting more Wealth, appointed the next Evening. They went together, opened the Ground, and found the Money they had first placed there, for the artful Wretch, he so much confided in, had conveyed it again into the Pot, in order to obtain more. Our Philosopher immediately took the Gold, and putting it into his Pocket, told the other he had now altered his Mind, and should bury it no more, till he found a Man more worthy of his Confidence. See what People lose by being dishonest. This calls to my Mind the Words of the Poet:

_A Wit's a Feather, and a Chief's a Rod, An honest Man's the noblest Work of God._

Remember this Story, and take Care whom you trust; but don't be covetous, sordid and miserable; for the Gold we have is but lent us to do Good with. We received all from the Hand of God, and every Person in Distress hath a just Title to a Portion of it.

_A_ LETTER _from the_ PRINTER, _which he desires may be inserted_.

SIR,

I have done with your Copy, so you may return it to the _Vatican_, if you please; and pray tell Mr. _Angelo_ to brush up the Cuts, that, in the next Edition, they may give us a good Impression.

The Foresight and Sagacity of Mrs. _Margery_'s Dog calls to my Mind a Circumstance, which happened when I was a Boy. Some Gentlemen in the Place where I lived had been hunting, and were got under a great Tree to shelter themselves from a Thunder Storm; when a Dog that always followed one of the Gentlemen leaped up his Horse several Times, and then ran away and barked. At last, the Gentlemen all followed to see what he would be at; and they were no sooner gone from the Tree, but it was shivered in Pieces by Lightning! 'Tis remarkable, that as soon as they came from the Tree the Dog appeared to be very well satisfied, and barked no more. The Gentleman after this always regarded the Dog as his Friend, treated him in his Old Age with great Tenderness, and fed him with Milk as long as he lived.

My old Master _Grierson_ had also a Dog, that ought to be mentioned with Regard; for he used to set him up as a Pattern of Sagacity and Prudence, not only to his Journeymen, but to the whole Neighbours. This Dog had been taught a thousand Tricks, and among other Feats he could dance, tumble, and drink Wine and Punch till he was little better than mad. It happened one Day, when the Men had made him drunk with Liquor, and he was capering about, that he fell into a large Vessel of boiling Water. They soon got him out, and he recovered; but he was very much hurt, and being sensible, that this Accident arose from his losing his Senses by Drinking, he would never taste any strong Liquor afterwards.--My old Master, on relating this Story, and shewing the Dog, used to address us thus, _Ah, my Friends, had you but half the Sense of this poor Dog here, you would never get fuddled, and be Fools._

I am, Sir, Your's, &c. W.B.

The BOOKS usually read by the Scholars of Mrs. TWO-SHOES, are these, and are sold at Mr. NEWBERY'S at the _Bible_ and _Sun_ in St. _Paul's_ Church-yard.

1. The _Christmas-Box_, Price 1d.

2. The History of _Giles Gingerbread_, 1d.

3. The _New-Year's-Gift_, 2d.

4. The _Easter-Gift_, 2d.

5. The _Whitsuntide-Gift_, 2d.

6. The _Twelfth-Day-Gift_, 1s.

7. The _Valentine's-Gift_, 6d.

8. The FAIRING or _Golden Toy_, 6d.

9. The _Royal Battledore_, 2d.

10. The _Royal Primer_, 3d.

11. The _Little Lottery-Book_, 3d.

12. The _Little Pretty Pocket-Book_, 6d.

13. The _Infant Tutor_, _or pretty Little Spelling-Book_, 6d.

14. The _Pretty Book for Children_, 6d.

15. _Tom Trapwit's Art of being Merry and Wife_, 6d.

16. _Tom Trip's History of Birds and Beasts_, Price 6d.

17. _Food for the Mind_, _or a New Riddle Book_, 6d.

18. _Fables in Verse and Prose by Æsop, and your old Friend Woglog_, 6d.

19. The _Holy Bible abridged_, 6d.

20. The _History of the Creation_, 6d.

21. _A new and noble History of England_, 6d.

22. _Philosophy for Children_, 6d.

23. _Philosophy of Tops and Balls_, 1s.

24. _Pretty Poems for Children 3 Foot high_, 6d.

25. _Pretty Poems for Children 6 Foot high_, 1s.

26. _Lilliputian Magazine, or Golden Library_, 1s.

27. _Short Histories for the Improvement of the Mind_, 1s.

28. The _New Testament_, adapted to the Capacities of Children, 1s.

29. The Life of our Blessed SAVIOUR, 1s.

30. The Lives of the Holy _Apostles_ and _Evangelists_, 1s.

31. The Lives of the _Fathers_ of the _Christian_ Church for the first four Centuries, 1s.

32. A Concise _Exposition_ of the Book of _Common Prayer_, with the Lives of its _Compilers_, 1s.

33. The _Museum_ for Youth, 1s.

34. An Easy _Spelling Dictionary_ for those who would write correctly, 1s.

35. A _Pocket Dictionary_ for those who would know the precise Meaning of all the Words in the _English_ Language, 3s.

36. A Compendious History of _England_, 2s.

37. The Present State of _Great Britain_, 2s.

38. A Little Book of Letters and Cards, to teach young Ladies and Gentlemen how to write to their Friends in a polite, easy and elegant Manner, 1s.

39. The Gentleman and Lady's Key to _Polite Literature_; or, A _Compendious Dictionary_ of Fabulous History, 2s.

40. The News-Readers Pocket-Book; or, A _Military Dictionary_, 2s.

41. A Curious Collection of Voyages, selected from the Writers of all Nations, 10 Vol. Pr. bound 1l.

42. A Curious Collection of Travels, selected from the Writers of all Nations, 10 Vol; Pr. bound 1l.

By the KING'S Royal Patent,

Are Sold by J. NEWBERY, at the _Bible_ and _Sun_ in _St. Paul's Church-Yard_.

1. Dr. _James's Powders_ for Fevers, the Small-Pox, Measles, Colds, &c. 2s. 6d.

2. Dr. _Hooper's Female Pills_, 1s.

3. Mr. _Greenough's Tincture_ for Teeth, 1s.

4. _Ditto_ for the Tooth-Ach, 1s.

5. _Stomachic Lozenges_ for the Heart-burn, Cholic, Indigestion, &c. 1s. 6d.

6. The _Balsam of Health_, or, (as it is by some called) the Balsam of Life, 1s. 6d.

7. The _Original Daffy's Elixir_, 1s. 3d.

8. Dr. _Anderson's Scots Pills_, 1s.

9. The _Original British Oil_, 1s.

10. The _Alterative Pills_, which are a safe, and certain Cure for the King's Evil, and all Scrophulous Complaints, 5s. the Box, containing 40 Doses.--_See a Dissertation on these Disorders sold at the Place above-mentioned_, Price 6d.