Chapter 5

FANNY [_laughing—kisses her_]. So I am. It was a brilliant idea. [_By this time she has kissed or shaken hands with the whole dozen_.] I can’t introduce you all singly; it would take too long. [_She makes a wholesale affair of it_.] My aunts, the Misses Wetherell—Dr. Freemantle.

_The Misses Wetherell_, _suggesting two mice being introduced to a party of friendly kittens_, _standing_, _clinging to one another_, _murmur something inaudible_.

DR. FREEMANTLE [_who is with them to comfort them—he has got rid of the time-table_, _discreetly—smiles_]. Delighted.

ENGLAND. Charmed. [_The others join in_, _turning it into a chorus_. _To Fanny_] Glad we didn’t strike one of your busy days. I say, you’re not as dressy as you used to be. ’Ow are they doing you?—all right?

FANNY. Yes. Oh, yes.

CANADA [“_Gerty_,” _a big_, _handsome girl_, _with a loud_, _commanding voice_]. George gave me your message.

FANNY [_puzzled at first_]. My message? [_Remembering—laughs_.] Oh. That I was Lady Bantock of Bantock Hall. Yes. I thought you’d be pleased.

CANADA. Was delighted, dear.

FANNY. So glad.

CANADA. I’d always had the idea that you were going to make a mess of your marriage.

FANNY. What a funny idea! [_But the laugh that accompanies it is not a merry one_.]

CANADA. Wasn’t it? So glad I was wrong.

WALES. We’re all of us looking out for lords in disguise, now. Can’t you give us a tip, dear, how to tell ’em?

SCOTLAND. Sukey has broken it off with her boy. Found he was mixed up in trade.

STRAITS SETTLEMENTS [_as before_, _unseen at back of crowd_]. No. I didn’t. ’Twas his moral character.

_Then enter Honoria with glasses on a tray_; _Ernest with champagne_; _Jane with eatables_; _Bennet with a napkin_. _It is a grim procession_. _The girls are scattered_, _laughing_, _talking_: _Africa to the Misses Wetherell_; _a couple to Dr. Freemantle_. _England_, _Scotland_, _Wales_, _and Canada are with Fanny_. _The hubbub_, _with the advent of the refreshments_, _increases_. _There is a general movement towards the refreshments_.

FANNY. Thanks, Bennet. You can clear away a corner of the desk.

ENGLAND [_aside to her_]. Go easy with it, dear. [_Fanny_, _smiling_, _nods_. _She directs operations in a low tone to the Bennets_, _who take her orders in grim silence and with lips tight shut_.] Don’t forget, girls, that we’ve got to get back to-night. [_Aside to the Doctor_, _who has come forward to help_.] Some of ’em, you know, ain’t used to it.

DR. FREEMANTLE [_nods_]. Glasses not _too_ full. [_He whispers to Fanny_.]

IRELAND [_a decided young woman_]. How much time have we got?

ENGLAND. Don’t ask me. It’s Judy’s show.

WALES [_mimicking Newte_]. The return train, ladies, leaves Oakham station. [_Stops—she is facing the clock_. _She begins to laugh_.]

ENGLAND. What’s the matter?

WALES [_still laughing_]. We’ve got just quarter of an hour to catch it.

_There is a wild rush for the refreshments_. _Jane is swept off her feet_. _Bennet’s tray is upset_.

ENGLAND. Quarter—! Oh, my Gawd! Here, tuck up your skirts, girls. We’ll have to—

DR. FREEMANTLE. It’s all right. You’ve got plenty of time, ladies. There’s a train from Norton on the branch line at 5.33. Gets you into London at a quarter to nine.

ENGLAND. You’re _sure_?

DR. FREEMANTLE [_he has his watch in his hand_]. Quite sure. The station is only half a mile away.

ENGLAND. Don’t let’s miss it. Keep your watch in your ’and, there’s a dear.

FANNY [_her business is—and has been—to move quietly through the throng_, _making the girls welcome_, _talking_, _laughing with them_, _directing the servants—all in a lady’s way_. _On the whole she does it remarkably well_. _She is offering a plate of fruit to Judy_]. You’re a nice acting manager, you are. [_Judy laughs_. _Fanny finds herself in front of Ireland_. _She turns to England_.] Won’t you introduce us?

ENGLAND. I beg your pardon, dear. Of course, you don’t know each other. Miss Tetsworth, our new Ireland, Lady Bantock. It is “Bantock,” isn’t it, dear?

FANNY. Quite right. It’s a good little part, isn’t it?

IRELAND. Well, depends upon what you’ve been used to.

ENGLAND. She’s got talent, as I tell ’er. But she ain’t you, dear. It’s no good saying she is.

FANNY [_hastening to smooth it over_]. People always speak so well of us after we’re gone. [_Laughs_.] You’ll take another glass of champagne.

IRELAND. Thank you—you made a great success, they tell me, in the part.

FANNY. Oh, there’s a deal of fluke about these things. You see, I had the advantage—

DR. FREEMANTLE [_with watch still in his hand_]. I _think_, ladies—

ENGLAND. Come on, girls.

_A general movement_.

FANNY. You must all come again—spend a whole day—some Sunday.

CANADA. Remember me to Vernon.

FANNY. He’ll be so sorry to have—

ENGLAND [_cutting in_]. ’Ope we ’aven’t upset you, dear. [_She is bustling them all up_.]

FANNY. Not at all. [_She is kissing the girls_.] It’s been so good to see you all again.

ENGLAND. ’Urry up, girls, there’s dears. [_To Fanny_] Good-bye, dear. [_Kissing her_.] We _do_ miss yer.

FANNY. I’m glad you do.

ENGLAND. Oh, it ain’t the same show. [_The others are crowding out of the door_. _She and Fanny are quite apart_.] No chance of your coming back to it, I suppose? [_A moment_.] Well, there, you never know, do yer? Good-bye, dear. [_Kisses her again_.]

FANNY. Good-bye! [_She stands watching them out_. _Bennet goes down with them_. _Ernest is busy collecting debris_. _Jane and Honoria stand one each side of the table_, _rigid_, _with set faces_. _After a moment Fanny goes to the open window_. _The voices of the girls below_, _crowding into the van_, _come up into the room_. _She calls down to them_.] Good-bye. You’ve plenty of time. What? Yes, of course. [_Laughs_.] All right. Good-bye. [_She turns_, _comes slowly back_. _She looks at Jane and Honoria_, _where they stand rigid_. _Honoria makes a movement with her shoulders—takes a step towards the door_.] Honoria! [_Honoria stops—slowly turns_.] You can take away these glasses. Jane will help you.

_Bennet has reappeared_.

HONORIA. It’s not my place—

FANNY. Your place is to obey my orders.

BENNET [_his coolness seems to have deserted him_. _His voice is trembling_]. Obey her ladyship’s orders, both of you. Leave the rest to me. [_Honoria and Jane busy themselves_, _with Ernest setting the room to rights_.] May I speak with your ladyship?

FANNY. Certainly.

BENNET. Alone, I mean.

FANNY. I see no need.

BENNET [_her firmness takes him aback_. _He expected to find her defiance disappear with the cause of it_. _But pig-headed_, _as all Bennets_, _her opposition only drives him on_]. Your ladyship is not forgetting the alternative?

_The Misses Wetherell have been watching the argument much as the babes in the wood might have watched the discussion between the two robbers_.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL [_in terror_]. Bennet! you’re not going to give notice!

BENNET. What my duty may be, I shall be able to decide after I have spoken with her ladyship—alone.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. Dear! You will see him?

FANNY. I am sorry. I have not the time.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. No. Of course. [_Appealing to Bennet for mercy_] Her ladyship is tired. To-morrow—

FANNY [_interrupting_]. Neither to-morrow—nor any other day. [_Vernon enters_, _followed by Newte_. _She advances to meet them_.] You’ve just missed some old friends of yours. [_She shakes hands with Newte_.]

VERNON. So it seems. We were hoping to have been in time. [_To Newte_] The mare came along pretty slick, didn’t she?

BENNET [_he has remained with his look fixed all the time on Fanny_]. May I speak with your lordship a moment—in private?

VERNON. Now?

BENNET. It is a matter that needs to be settled now. [_It is the tone of respectful authority he has always used towards the lad_.]

VERNON. Well, if it’s as pressing as all that I suppose you must. [_He makes a movement towards the door_. _To Newte_] Shan’t be long.

FANNY. One moment. [_Vernon stops_.] I may be able to render the interview needless. Who is mistress of this house?

VERNON. Who is mistress?

FANNY. Who is mistress of your house?

VERNON. Why, you are, of course.

FANNY. Thank you. [_She turns to Bennet_] Please tell Mrs. Bennet I want her.

BENNET. I think if your lordship—

FANNY. At once. [_She is looking at him_. _He struggles—looks at Vernon_. _But Vernon is evidently inclined to support Fanny_. _Bennet goes out_. _She crosses and seats herself at the desk_. _She takes from a drawer some neatly folded papers_. _She busies herself with figures_.]

VERNON [_he crosses to his Aunts_]. Whatever’s the matter?

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. She is excited. She has had a very trying time.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. Bennet didn’t like the idea of her receiving them.

NEWTE. It was that minx Judy’s doing. They’ll have the rough side of my tongue when I get back—all of them.

VERNON. What does she want with Mrs. Bennet?

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. I can’t think.

_The atmosphere is somewhat that of a sheepfold before a thunderstorm_. _The Misses Wetherell are still clinging to one another_. _Vernon and Dr. Freemantle are both watching Fanny_. _Jane_, _Honoria_, _and Ernest are still busy about the room_.

_Suddenly_, _to Newte—who is standing apart—the whole thing comes with a rush_. _But it is too late for him to interfere_.

_Mrs. Bennet_, _followed by Bennet_, _are entering the room_. _He shrugs his shoulders and turns away_.

MRS. BENNET. Your ladyship sent for me?

FANNY. Yes. [_She half turns—holds out a paper_.] This wages sheet is quite correct, I take it? It is your own.

MRS. BENNET [_she takes it_]. Quite correct.

FANNY [_she tears out a cheque she has written—hands it to Mrs. Bennet_]. You will find there two months’ wages for the entire family. I have made it out in a lump sum payable to your husband. The other month is in lieu of notice. [_A silence_. _The thing strikes them all dumb_. _She puts the cheque-book back and closes the drawer_. _She rises_.] I’m sorry. There’s been a misunderstanding. It’s time that it ended. It has been my own fault. [_To Vernon_] I deceived you about my family—

NEWTE. If there’s been any deceit—

FANNY. My scene, please, George. [_Newte_, _knowing her_, _returns to silence_.] I have no relations outside this country that I know of. My uncle is Martin Bennet, your butler. Mrs. Bennet is my aunt. I’m not ashamed of them. If they’d had as much respect for me as I have for them, this trouble would not have arisen. We don’t get on together, that’s all. And this seems to me the only way out. As I said before, I’m sorry.

VERNON [_recovering speech_]. But why did you—?

FANNY [_her control gives way_. _She breaks out_]. Oh, because I’ve been a fool. It’s the explanation of most people’s muddles, I expect, if they only knew it. Don’t talk to me, anybody. I’ve got nothing more to say. [_To Bennet_] I’m sorry. You wouldn’t give me a chance. I’d have met you half way. [_To Mrs. Bennet_] I’m sorry. Don’t be too hard on me. It won’t mean much trouble to you. Good servants don’t go begging. You can depend upon me for a character. [_To Jane_] You’ll do much better for yourselves elsewhere. [_To Honoria_] Don’t let that pretty face of yours ever get you into trouble. [_To Ernest_] Good-bye, Ernest. We were always pals, weren’t we? Good-bye. [_She kisses him_. _It has all been the work of a moment_. _She comes down again_.] Don’t think me rude, but I’d like to be alone. We can talk calmly about it all to-morrow morning. [_To the Misses Wetherell_] I’m so awfully sorry. I wish I could have seen any other way out. [_The tears are streaming from her eyes_. _To Vernon_] Take them all away, won’t you, dear? We’ll talk about it all to-morrow. I’ll feel gooder. [_She kisses him_. _To Dr. Freemantle_] Take them all away. Tell him it wasn’t all my fault. [_To Newte_] You’ll have to stop the night. There are no more trains. I’ll see you in the morning. Good night.

_Bennet has collected his troop_. _Leads them away_. _Dr. Freemantle_, _kindly and helpful_, _takes off Vernon and the two ladies_.

NEWTE [_he grips her hand_, _and speaks in his short_, _growling way_]. Good night, old girl. [_He follows the others out_.]

FANNY [_crosses towards the windows_. _Her chief business is dabbing her eyes_. _The door closes with a click_. _She turns_. _She puts her handkerchief away_. _She looks at the portrait of Constance_, _first Lady Bantock_]. I believe it’s what you’ve been telling me to do, all the time.

[CURTAIN]

_ACT IV_

_SCENE_

_The same_. _The blinds are down_. _Ashes fill the grate_.

_Time_.—_Early the next morning_.

_The door opens softly_. _Newte steals in_. _He fumbles his way across to the windows_, _draws the blinds_. _The morning sun streams in_. _He listens—no one seems to be stirring_. _He goes out_, _returns immediately with a butler’s tray_, _containing all things necessary for a breakfast and the lighting of a fire_. _He places the tray on table_, _throws his coat over a chair_, _and is on his knees busy lighting the fire_, _when enter the Misses Wetherell_, _clad in dressing-gowns and caps_: _yet still they continue to look sweet_. _They also creep in_, _hand in hand_. _The crouching Newte is hidden by a hanging fire-screen_. _They creep forward till the coat hanging over the chair catches their eye_. _They are staring at it as Robinson Crusoe might at the footprint_, _when Newte rises suddenly and turns_. _The Misses Wetherell give a suppressed scream_, _and are preparing for flight_.

NEWTE [_he stays them_]. No call to run away, ladies. When a man’s travelled—as I have—across America, in a sleeping-car, with a comic-opera troop, there’s not much left for him to know. You want your breakfast! [_He wheedles them to the table_.] We’ll be able to talk cosily—before anybody else comes.

_They yield themselves_. _He has a way with him_.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. We haven’t slept all night.

_Newte answers with a sympathetic gesture_. _He is busy getting ready the breakfast_.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. There’s something we want to tell dear Vernon—before he says anything to Fanny.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. It’s something very important.

NEWTE. We’ll have a cup of tea first—to steady our nerves.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. It’s so important that we should tell him before he sees Fanny.

NEWTE. We’ll see to it. [_He makes the tea_.] I fancy they’re both asleep at present.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. Poor boy!

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. If she only hadn’t—

_Dr. Freemantle has entered_.

DR. FREEMANTLE. I thought I heard somebody stirring—

NEWTE. Hush! [_He indicates doors_, _the one leading to her ladyship’s apartments_, _the other to his lordship’s_.]

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL [_turning and greeting him_]. It was so kind of you not to leave us last night.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. We were so upset.

_Dr. Freemantle pats their hands_.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. We hope you slept all right.

DR. FREEMANTLE. Excellently. Shall be glad of a shave, that’s all. [_Laughs_. _Both he and Newte suggest the want of one_.]

NEWTE [_who has been officiating_]. Help yourself to milk and sugar.

DR. FREEMANTLE [_who has seated himself_]. Have the Bennets gone?

NEWTE. Well, they had their notice all right.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL [_they have begun to cry_]. It has been so wrong and foolish of us. We have never learnt to do anything for ourselves.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. We don’t even know where our things are.

DR. FREEMANTLE. They can’t all have gone—the whole twenty-three of them, at a couple of hours’ notice. [_To Newte_] Haven’t seen any of them, have you?

NEWTE. No sign of any of them downstairs.

DR. FREEMANTLE. Oh, they must be still here. Not up, I suppose. It isn’t seven o’clock yet.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. But they have all been discharged. We can’t ask them to do anything.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL [_to her sister_]. And the Grimstones are coming to lunch with the new curate. Vernon asked them on Sunday.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. Perhaps there’s something cold.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. Vernon so dislikes a cold lunch.

DR. FREEMANTLE [_to Newte_]. Were you able to get hold of Vernon last night?

NEWTE. Waited up till he came in about two o’clock. Merely answered that he wasn’t in a talkative mood—brushed past me and locked himself in.

DR. FREEMANTLE. He wouldn’t say anything to me either. Rather a bad sign when he won’t talk.

NEWTE. What’s he likely to do?

DR. FREEMANTLE. Don’t know. Of course it will be all over the county.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. And dear Vernon is so sensitive.

DR. FREEMANTLE. It had to come—the misfortune _is_—

NEWTE. The misfortune _is_ that people won’t keep to their own line of business. Why did he want to come fooling around her? She was doing well for herself. She could have married a man who would have thought more of her than all the damn fools in the county put together. Why couldn’t he have left her alone?

DR. FREEMANTLE [_he is sitting at the head of the table_, _between Newte on his right and the Misses Wetherell on his left_. _He lays his hand on Newte’s sleeve—with a smile_]. I’m sure you can forgive a man—with eyes and ears in his head—for having fallen in love with her.

NEWTE. Then why doesn’t he stand by her? What if her uncle is a butler? If he wasn’t a fool, he’d be thanking his stars that ’twas anything half as respectable.

DR. FREEMANTLE. I’m not defending him—we’re not sure yet that he needs any defence. He has married a clever, charming girl of—as you say—a better family than he’d any right to expect. The misfortune is, that—by a curious bit of ill-luck—it happens to be his own butler.

NEWTE. If she takes my advice, she’ll return to the stage. No sense stopping where you’re not wanted.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. But how can she?

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. You see, they’re married!

DR. FREEMANTLE [_to change the subject_]. You’ll take an egg?

_Newte has been boiling some_. _He has just served them_.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL [_rejecting it_]. Thank you.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. We’re not feeling hungry.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. He was so fond of her.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. She was so pretty.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. And so thoughtful.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. One would never have known she was an actress.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. If only she hadn’t—

_Bennet has entered_. _Newte is at fireplace_. _The old ladies have their backs to the door_. _Dr. Freemantle_, _who is pouring out tea_, _is the first to see him_. _He puts down the teapot_, _staring_. _The old ladies look round_. _A silence_. _Newte turns_. _Bennet is again the perfect butler_. _Yesterday would seem to have been wiped out of his memory_.

BENNET. Good morning, Miss Wetherell. Good morning, Miss Edith. [_To the two men_] Good morning. I was not aware that breakfast was required to be any earlier than usual, or I should have had it ready.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. We are sure you would, Bennet. But you see, under the circumstances, we—we hardly liked to trouble you.

BENNET [_he goes about the room_, _putting things to rights_. _He has rung the bell_. _Some dead flowers he packs on to Newte’s tray_, _the water he pours into Newte’s slop-basin_]. My duty, Miss Edith, I have never felt to be a trouble to me.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. We know, Bennet. You have always been so conscientious. But, of course, after what’s happened—[_They are on the verge of tears again_.]

BENNET [_he is piling up the breakfast things_]. Keziah requested me to apologise to you for not having heard your bell this morning. She will be ready to wait upon you in a very few minutes. [_To the Doctor_] You will find shaving materials, doctor, on your dressing-table.

DR. FREEMANTLE. Oh, thank you.

_Ernest has entered_, _with some wood_; _he is going towards the fire_.

BENNET [_to Ernest_]. Leave the fire for the present. Take away this tray. [_Ernest takes up the tray_, _and goes out_. _Bennet speaks over the heads of the Misses Wetherell to Newte_] Breakfast will be ready in the morning-room, in a quarter of an hour.

NEWTE [_at first puzzled_, _then indignant_, _now breaks out_]. What’s the little game on here—eh? Yesterday afternoon you were given the sack—by your mistress, Lady Bantock, with a month’s wages in lieu of notice—not an hour before you deserved it. What do you mean, going on like this, as if nothing had happened? Is Lady Bantock to be ignored in this house as if she didn’t exist—or is she not? [_He brings his fist down on the table_. _He has been shouting rather than speaking_.] I want this thing settled!

BENNET. Your bath, Mr. Newte, is quite ready.

NEWTE [_as soon as he can recover speech_]. Never you mind my bath, I want—

_Vernon has entered_. _He is pale_, _heavy-eyed_, _short in his manner_, _listless_.

VERNON. Good morning—everybody. Can I have some breakfast, Bennet?

BENNET. In about ten minutes; I will bring it up here. [_He collects the kettle from the fire as he passes_, _and goes out_.]

VERNON. Thank you. [_He responds mechanically to the kisses of his two aunts_, _who have risen and come to him_.]

NEWTE. Can I have a word with you?

VERNON. A little later on, if you don’t mind, Mr. Newte. [_He passes him_.]

NEWTE [_he is about to speak_, _changes his mind_]. All right, go your own way. [_Goes out_.]

DR. FREEMANTLE. “Remember”, says Marcus Aurelius—

VERNON. Yes—good old sort, Marcus Aurelius. [_He drops listlessly into a chair_.]

_Dr. Freemantle smiles resignedly_, _looks at the Misses Wetherell_, _shrugs his shoulders_, _and goes out_, _closing the door after him_.

_The Misses Wetherell whisper together—look round cautiously_, _steal up behind him_, _encouraging one another_.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. She’s so young.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. And so adaptable.

VERNON [_he is sitting_, _bowed down_, _with his face in his hands_]. Ah, it was the deception.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL [_she puts her old thin hand on his shoulder_]. What would you have done, dear, if she had told you—at first?

VERNON [_he takes her hand in his—answers a little brokenly_]. I don’t know.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. There’s something we wanted to tell you. [_He looks at her_. _They look across at each other_.] The first Lady Bantock, your great-grandmamma—

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. She danced with George III.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. She was a butcher’s daughter.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. He was quite a little butcher.

THE ELDER MISS WETHERELL. Of course, as a rule, dear, we never mention it.

THE YOUNGER MISS WETHERELL. We felt you ought to know. [_They take each other’s hands_; _on tip-toe they steal out_. _They close the door softly behind them_.]

_Vernon rises_. _He looks at the portrait—draws nearer to it_. _With his hands in his pockets_, _stops dead in front of it_, _and contemplates it in silence_. _The door of the dressing-room opens_. _Fanny enters_. _She is dressed for going out_. _She stands for a moment_, _the door in her hand_. _Vernon turns_. _She closes the door and comes forward_.

VERNON. Good morning.

FANNY. Good morning. George stayed the night, didn’t he?

VERNON. Yes. He’s downstairs now.

FANNY. He won’t be going for a little while?

VERNON. Can’t till the ten o’clock train. Have you had breakfast?

FANNY. I—I’ve had something to eat. I’m sorry for what I did last night—although they did deserve it. [_Laughs_.] I suppose it’s a matter than can easily be put right again.