Chapter 4

The Pinheads

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The following morning, bright and early, Dorothy and her friends started out for the forest where the Cowardly Lion lived. The Lion had stayed there to help all the animals who lived in the forest to fight a fierce monster, and was now King of the Beasts.

"Perhaps we should order a Pinhead river and raft to take us as far as the Dainty China Country," said the Scarecrow.

"But I can't swim," replied the Tin Woodman. "What if I fall overboard?"

"Oh, don't worry about that," said the Scarecrow. "Pinhead rivers are only a couple of feet deep. The worst that can happen to you if you fall in the water is a rusty joint or two."

"Well, I'd better pack my oil-can then," replied the Tin Woodman seriously.

"The Pinheads," explained the Scarecrow, turning to Dorothy, "are almost an extinct breed. You'll find them very interesting. The few that are left live in a small village nearby."

Dorothy looked completely perplexed. "But order a river? You mean you can order a river on demand? Just like that?"

"Just wait and see," replied the Scarecrow, with a knowing grin.

As they approached the Pinheads' village, a few Pinhead children ran out to meet them. Dorothy could see why were called Pinheads. Their heads really were the size of a pin, and when they spoke, their voices were high and squeaky.

"Have you come for R and R?" squeaked one of the Pinhead children.

"R and R?" questioned Dorothy, "You mean rest and recreation?"

With that all the pinhead children burst into a fit of high squeaky laughter.

"That's river and raft," explained the Scarecrow, trying to ease Dorothy's obvious embarrassment. "The Pinheads make their living from supplying rivers and building rafts." Then, turning to the Pinhead child, he asked, "How much will it cost?" Just then some adult Pinheads approached.

"That depends," said a Pinhead male who appeared to be their leader.

"Depends on what?" asked the Scarecrow.

"On whether or not you have a pin cushion," the leader replied. "If you do, the R and R will be free."

"Well, I don't have one," said the Scarecrow.

"And neither do I," said the Tin Woodman.

"I have one!" exclaimed Dorothy, digging into her purse. "But what on earth do you want a pin cushion for?"

"Well, as you can see," replied the Pinhead," our feet are pointed; and since we sleep standing up, pin cushions make wonderful beds. We just hold our feet tightly together and jump onto the pin cushion and sink down to our heads. It is so cozy and warm, you wouldn't believe it."

"I don't understand how that can be," said Dorothy. "I know you are not very big, but this pin cushion seems far too small for you to stand on, let alone sink down to your head."

"Oh, that's not a problem for us," replied the Pinhead. "You see, we have the ability to make little things big. How do you think we could make a big raft for you giants? We just make the raft out of match-sticks and thread, and when it's enlarged it looks like it's made out of big logs and rope."

"But how do you do that?" exclaimed the girl.

"Oh, that's easy," replied the Pinhead. "You see, after the object is made, we look at it under our big magnifying glass. This magnifying glass is no ordinary magnifying glass, but has the ability to magnify things permanently. It was given to our ancestors by a male witch who had no further use for it."

"Why don't you look at each other's heads with it?" asked the Scarecrow seriously. "Then you'd all have bigger heads."

"Oh, it won't work on living things," replied the Pinhead. "Besides, we like the way we look. How would it be if everyone in Oz looked the same? All skinny or all fat, all tall or all short, all white or all yellow, all blue or all green, all --"

"All right, all right! You've made your point," said the Scarecrow. "My brain is fairly new and it's just not used to thinking that much yet."

"I agree with you, Mr. Pinhead," said Dorothy. The world would be a very dull place if everyone looked the same. Imagine what it would be like if everyone looked exactly alike, thought exactly alike, and talked exactly alike! There would be no point to existence."

"My sentiments entirely!" said the Pinhead.

"Getting back to the business at hand," said Dorothy. "I'm still mystified as to how you create a river to order?"

"Well," answered the Pinhead. "It's quite simple, really. We have this huge reservoir that was created by building a dam to capture the tears of a giant that was a bit of a cry-baby, to say the least. The slightest little hurt would set him off on a crying spell. We turned his excessive crying into a cottage industry by utilizing the stored up tears for our new company, /Rivers on Demand, Inc.,/ and since the tears have magical qualities we can direct the river to and fro', uphill or downhill, exactly as we wish to suit the customer's order. The river even knows to avoid dwelling places and other inhabited areas, and to return immediately to the reservoir when its passengers have disembarked."

"Remarkable!" replied Dorothy. "Just remarkable."

With that, they all went down to the newly created river to board the raft that had just been completed for them. After stepping aboard they barely had time to wave goodbye to their new friends as the river quickly whisked them on their way.

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