Chapter 3

I takes me pipe out uv me mouth an' stares, An' stammers, "Must 'ave found a piece--somewheres." But, by the way she smiles--so extra sweet-- I know she twigs me game, an' I am beat. "Fancy," she sez. "Yeh're absent-minded, dear. Sure there was nothin' else yeh wanted 'ere?"

"Nothin'," I sez, an' feels a first-prize fool; An' goes outside, an' grabs the nearest tool. It was the crosscut; so I works like mad To keep me self-respeck from goin' bad. "This game," I tells meself, "will do yeh good. You ain't proficient, yet, at sawin' wood."

XII. JIM

Jim

"NOW, be the Hokey Fly!" sez Peter Begg. "Suppose 'e comes 'ome with a wooden leg. Suppose 'e isn't fit to darnce at all, Then, ain't we 'asty fixin' up this ball? A little tournament at Bridge is my Idear," sez Peter. "Be the Hokey Fly!"

Ole Peter Begg is gettin' on in years. 'E owns a reel good farm; an' all 'e fears Is that some girl will land 'im, by are by, An' share it with 'im--be the Hokey Fly. That's 'is pet swear-word, an' I dunno wot 'E's meanin', but 'e uses it a lot.

"Darncin'!" growls Begg. We're fixin' up the 'all With bits uv green stuff for a little ball To welcome Jim, 'oo's comin' 'ome nex' day. We're 'angin' flags around to make things gay, An' shiftin' chairs, an' candle-greasin' floors, 'As is our way when blokes come 'ome from wars.

"A little game uv Bridge," sez Peter Begg, "Would be more decent like, an' p'r'aps a keg Uv somethin' if the 'ero's feelin' dry. But this 'ere darncin'! Be the Hokey Fly, These selfish women never thinks at all About the guest; they only wants the ball.

"Now, cards," sez Begg, "amuses ev'ry one. An' then our soldier guest could 'ave 'is fun If 'e'd lost _both_ 'is legs. It makes me sick 'Ere! Don't yeh spread that candle-grease too thick Yeh're wastin' it; an' us men 'as to buy Enough for nonsense, be the Hokey Fly!"

Begg, 'e ain't never keen on wastin' much. "Peter," I sez, "it's you that needs a crutch. Why don't yeh get a wife, an' settle down?" 'E looks reel fierce, an' answers, with a frown, "Do you think I am goin' to be rooked For 'arf me tucker, jist to get it cooked?"

I lets it go at that, an' does me job; An' when a little later on I lob Along the 'omeward track, down by Flood's gate I meet ole Digger Smith, an' stops to state Me views about the weather an' the war. . . . 'E tells me Jim gets 'ere nex' day, at four.

An' as we talk, I sees along the road A strange bloke 'umpin' some queer sort uv load. I points 'im out to Smith an' sez; "'Oo's that? Looks like a soldier, don't 'e, be 'is 'at?" "Stranger," sez Digger, "be the cut uv 'im." But, trust a mother's eyes. . . . "_It's Jim! My Jim_!

"My Jim!" I 'ears; an', scootin' up the track Come Missus Flood, with Flo close at 'er back. It was a race, for lover an' for son; They finished neck an' neck; but mother won, For it was 'er that got the first good 'ug. (I'm so took back I stands there like a mug.)

_Then_ come Flo's turn; an' Jim an' Digger they Shake 'ands without no fancy, gran'-stand play. Yeh'd think they parted yesterd'y, them two. For all the wild 'eroics that they do. "Yeh done it, lad," sez Jim. "I knoo yeh would." "You bet," sez Smith; "but I'm all to the good."

Then, uv a sudden, all their tongues is loosed. They finds me there an' I am intrajuiced; An' Jim tells 'ow it was 'e come to land So soon, while Mar an' Flo each 'olds a 'and. But, jist as sudden, they all stop an' stare Down to the 'ouse, at Dad Flood standin' there.

'E's got 'is 'and up shadin' off the sun. Then 'e starts up to them; but Dad don't run 'E isn't 'owlin' for 'is lost boy's kiss; 'E's got 'is own sweet way in things like this. 'E wanders up, an' stands an' looks at Jim. An', spare me days, that look was extra grim!

I seen the mother pluckin' at 'er dress; I seen the girl's white face an' 'er distress. An' Digger Smith, 'e looks reel queer to me Grinnin' inside 'imself 'e seemed to be. At last Dad sez--oh, 'e's a tough ole gun! "Well, are yeh sorry now for wot yeh done?"

Jim gives a start; but answers with a grin, "Well, Dad, I 'ave been learnin' discipline. An' tho' I ain't quite sure wot did occur Way back"--'e's grinnin' worse--"I'm sorry, sir." (It beats me, that, about these soldier blokes They're always grinnin', like all things was jokes.)

P'r'aps Dad is gettin' dull in 'is ole age; But 'e don't seem to see Jim's cammyflage. P'r'aps 'e don't want to; for, in 'is ole eye, I seen a twinkle as 'e give reply. "Nex' week," 'e sez, "we will begin to cart The taters. Yeh can make another start."

But then 'e grabs Jim's 'and. I seen the joy In mother's eyes. "Now, welcome 'ome, me boy," Sez Dad; an' then 'e adds, "Yeh've made me proud;" That's all. An' 'e don't add it none too loud. Dad don't express 'is feelin's in a shout; It cost 'im somethin' to git that much out.

. . . . . . . . .

We 'ad the darnce. An', spite uv all Begg's fears, Jim darnced like 'e could keep it up for years; Mostly with Flo. We don't let up till three; An' then ole Peter Begg, Doreen an' me We walk together 'ome, an' on the way, Doreen 'as quite a lot uv things to say.

"Did you see Flo?" sez she. "Don't she look grand? That Jim's the luckiest in all the land-- An' little Smith--that girl uv 'is, I'm sure, She'll bring 'im 'appiness that will endure." She 'ugs my arm, then sez, "'Usband or wife, If it's the right one, is the wealth uv life."

I sneaks a look at Begg, an' answers, "Yes, Yeh're right, ole girl; that's the reel 'appiness. An' if ole, lonely growlers was to know The worth uv 'appy marridge 'ere below, They'd swap their bank-books for a wife," sez I. Sez Peter Begg, "_Well! Be the--Hokey--Fly_!"

XIII. A SQUARE DEAL

A Square Deal

"DREAMIN'?" I sez to Digger Smith. "Buck up, ole sport, an' smile. Ain't there enough uv joy to-day To drive the bogey man away An' make reel things worth while? A bloke would think, to see you stare, There's visions on the 'ill-tops there."

"Dreamin'," sez Digger Smith. "Why not? An' there is visions too. An' when I get 'em sorted out, An' strafe that little bogey, Doubt, I'll start me life all new. Oh, I ain't crook; but packed in 'ere Is thoughts: enough to last a year.

"I'm thinkin' things," sez Digger Smith. "I'm thinkin' big an' fine Uv Life an' Love an' all the rest, An' wot is right an' wot is best, An' 'ow much will be mine. Not that I'm wantin' overmuch Some work, some play, an' food an' such."

"See 'ere," I sez. "You 'ark to me. I've done some thinkin' too. An' this 'ere land, for wot yeh did, Owes some few million solid quid To fightin' blokes like you. So don't be too dam modest or Yeh'll git less than yeh're lookin' for."

"Money?" sez Digger. "Loot?" sez 'e "Aw, give that talk a rest! I'm sick uv it. I didn't say That I was thinkin' all uv pay, But wot was right an' best. An' that ain't in the crazy game Uv grabbin' wealth an' chasin' fame.

"Do you think us blokes Over There, When things was goin' strong, Was keepin' ledgers day be day An' reck'nin' wot the crowd would pay? Pull off! Yeh got it wrong. Do you think all the boys gone West Wants great swank 'ead-stones on their chest?

"You chaps at 'ome 'as small ideer Uv wot we think an' feel. We done our bit an' seen it thro', An' all that we are askin' you Is jist a fair, square deal. We want this land we battled for To settle up--an' somethin' more.

"We want the land we battled for To be a land worth while. We're sick uv greed, an' 'ate, an' strife, An' all the mess that's made uv life." . . . 'E stopped a bit to smile. "I got these thoughts Out There becos We learnt wot mateship reely was."

. . . . . . . .

The hills be'ind the orchard trees Was showin' misty blue. The ev'nin' light was growin' dim; An' down I sat 'longside uv 'im, An' done some dreamin' too. I dreams uv war; an' wot is paid By blokes that went an' blokes that stayed.

I dreams uv honour an' reward, An' 'ow to pay a debt. For partin' cash, an' buyin' farms, An' fittin' chaps with legs an' arms Ain't all--there's somethin' yet. There's still a solid balance due; An' now it's up to me an' you.

There's men I know ain't yet woke up, Or reckernized that debt-- Proud men 'oo wouldn't take yeh down Or owe their grocer 'arf-a-crown-- They ain't considered, yet, There's somethin' owin'--to the dead, An' Diggers live for more than bread.

"_We_ learnt wot mateship was," 'e sez. "Us Diggers found the good That's hid away somewhere in chaps, An' ain't searched for enough, per'aps, Or prized, or understood. But all this game uv grab an' greed An' silly 'ate--Why, where's the need?"

The hills be'ind the orchard trees Jist caught the settin' sun. A bloke might easy think that there, 'Way back be'ind the range somewhere, Where streaks uv sunlight run, There was a land, swep' clear uv doubt, Where men finds wot they dreams about.

. . . . . . . . .

"Beauty," sez Digger, sudden-like, "An' love, an' kindliness; The chance to live a clean, straight life, A dinkum deal for kids an' wife A man needs nothin' less. . . . Maybe they'll get it when I go To push up daisies. I dunno."

"Dreamin'," sez Digger Smith. "Why not? There's visions on the hill.". . . Then I gets up an' steals away, An' leaves 'im with the dyin' day, Dreamin' an' doubtin' still. . . . Cobber, it's up to me an' you To see that 'arf 'is dream comes true.

THE END

GLOSSARY

Alley, to throw in the.--To surrender. Ar.--An exclamation expressing joy, sorrow, surprise, etc., according to the manner of utterance. Aussie.--Australia; an Australian.

Bag of tricks.--All one's belongings. Barrack.--To take sides. Beat the band.--To amaze. Bint.--Girl. Bird, to give the.--To treat with derision. Blighty.--London. Blind.--Deception, "bluff." Bloke.--A male adult of the genus homo. Bluff.--Cunning practice; make-believe; to deceive; to mislead. Bonzer,--The best. Book.--In whist, six tricks. Booked.--Engaged. Buckley's (Chance)--A forlorn hope. Buck up.--Cheer up. Bunk, to do a.--To depart.

Chap.--A "bloke" or "cove." Chuck off--To chaff; to employ sarcasm. Chuck up.--To relinquish. Chump.--A foolish fellow. Cobber--A boon companion. Coot.--A person of no account (used contemptuously). Cove--A "chap" or "bloke." q.v. (Gipsy). Cow.--A thoroughly unworthy, not to say despicable person, place, thing or circumstance. Crack--To smite. Crack hardy.--To suppress emotion; to endure patiently; to keep a secret. Crook.--Unwell; dishonest; spurious; fraudulent. Superlative, dead crook. Crook.--A dishonest or evil person. Crool.--To frustrate; to interfere with.

Dead.--In a superlative degree; very. Deal.--A "hand" at cards. Digger.--An infantryman; a comrade. Dilly.--Foolish; half-witted. Dinkum.--Honest; true. Dipped.--Mentally deficient. Dizzy limit--The utmost; the superlative degree. Dope.--A drug. Dud.--No good; ineffective; used up.

Fag.--A cigarette. Final, to run one's.--To die. Final kick.--Final leave. Fly.--A turn; a try.

Game.--Occupation; scheme; design. Grandstand play.--Playing to the gallery. Groggy.--Unsteady. Grouch.--To mope; to grumble.

Hokey Fly, by the.--A mild expletive, without any particular meaning. Hump, to--To carry, as a swag or other burden.

Job.--Work, occupation. John 'Op (or Jonop)--Policeman. Jolt.--A blow.

Keep one down.--Take a drink. Kick.--Leave. Kick about.--To loaf or hang about. Kid--A child. Kid, to.--To deceive; to persuade with flattery. Lob, to--To arrive. Lurk--A plan of action; a regular occupation. Moniker.--A name; a title; a signature. Mug.--A simpleton.

Nail.--Catch. Nark.--s., a spoil--sport; a churlish fellow. Nark, to.--To annoy; to foil. Neck and neck.--Side by side. Nix.--Nothing. Nod, on the.--Without payment.

Pal.--A friend; a mate (Gipsy). Part.--Give; hand over. Pins.--Legs. Pull, to take a.--To desist; to discontinue. Pull off.--Desist. Pull my (or your) leg.--To deceive or get the best of. Punter.--The natural prey of bookmakers (betting men). Push up daisies, to.--To be interred.

Quid.--A sovereign, or pound sterling.

Rag.--Song in rag time. Rattled--Excited; confused. Recomeniber.--Remember. Renege.--To fail to follow suit (in playing cards); to quit. Rile--To annoy. Riled--Roused to anger. Ringer.--Expert. Rook, to.--To "take down." Rouse (or Roust).--To upbraid with many words. Ructions.--Growling; argument. Run 'is final.--Died.

Sawing wood--"Bluffing;" biding one's time. School.--A club; a clique of gamblers, or others. Scoot.--To hurry; to scuttle. Scrap.--Fight. Shicker--Intoxicating liquor. Skite.--To boast. Slam,--Making all the tricks (in card-playing). Sling.--Discard; throw. Slope, to.--To leave in haste. Smooge.--To flatter or fawn; to bill and coo. Snarky--Angry. Sock it into.--To administer physical punishment. S.O.S--Signal of distress or warning, used in telegraphy. Spare my days.--A pious ejaculation. Spell.--Rest or change. Sprag--To accost truculently; to convince. Spuds.--Potatoes. Square.--Upright; honest. Squeak.--To give away a secret. Stoke.--Eat. Stop one.--To receive a blow. Stoush--To punch with the fist. s., Violence. Strength.--Truth; correct estimate. Strike me!--The innocuous remnant of a hardy curse. 'Struth!--An emaciated oath. Stunt.--A performance; a tale. [At the front: a battle, engagement] Swank.--Affectation; ostentation. Swap.--Exchange. Swiv'ly--Afraid, or unable, to look straight.

Take down.--Deceive; get the best of. Tart.--A young woman (contraction of sweetheart). Tater--Potato. Throw in the alley.--To surrender. Tip.--A warning; a prognostication; a hint. Toff.--An exalted person. Tony.--Stylish. Tossed out on my neck.--Rejected. Track with--To woo; to "go walking with." Treat.--Very much or very good. Tucker.--Food. Twig.--To observe; to espy.

Umptydoo.--Far-fetched; "crook." Up to us.--Our duty.

Wade in--Take your fill. Wise, to put.--To explain; to instruct. Wowser--A narrow-minded, intolerant person.

Yap--To talk volubly.