Chapter 21

TIME: _one month later._ PLACE: _a field near Gotham._

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HODGE. PODGE. NODGE. SCRODGE. KING. SOLDIERS. OLD MEN OF GOTHAM. YOUNG MEN OF GOTHAM. PETER AND OTHER GOTHAM BOYS. POLLIE AND OTHER GOTHAM GIRLS.

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[_The_ OLD MEN, _the_ YOUNG MEN, _and the_ CHILDREN _are in the field._]

AN OLD MAN. Well, the king's men have taken all the trees away.

A YOUNG MAN. A good month's work it made them, too!

ANOTHER OLD MAN. And now the king will come again!

PETER. And we shall lose our noses!

POLLIE. I do not wish to lose my nose!

[_Enter_ SCRODGE, _running._]

SCRODGE. The king is coming!

[_Enter_ HODGE, _running._]

HODGE. The king is coming!

[_Enter_ PODGE _and_ NODGE, _running._]

PODGE _and_ NODGE. The king is coming!

PETER. And we shall lose our noses!

POLLIE. Oh dear! Oh dear! I'll lose my nose!

CHILDREN. Oh dear! We'll lose our noses!

HODGE. Now get you back to Gotham, children! You will not lose your noses.

PODGE. Quick, now--before the king comes!

[_The children go, holding their noses._]

NODGE. Now, Gotham men, do you all know what to do?

OLD MEN. Aye! Aye!

YOUNG MEN. Aye! Aye!

[_All the men begin to work._]

PODGE. I think this will save our noses.

[_Enter the_ KING _and the_ SOLDIERS.]

KING. Is there a tree left on the road?

FIRST SOLDIER. We took them all away, Sire.

KING (to _a soldier._) Then go and get our horses. We will ride into this Gotham town. (_The soldier salutes and goes._)

Where do you roll these stones, old men?

AN OLD MAN. Uphill to help the sun rise.

KING. What! To help the sun rise?

OLD MAN. Yes, your Majesty.

KING. Don't you know that the sun will rise without help?

OLD MAN. Will it? Well, well! Who would have thought of that!

KING. You foolish fellows! Well, go on and roll your stones. Now tell me why you grunt, young men?

A YOUNG MAN. Oh, we do the grunting while our fathers do the work.

KING. Ha, ha! Well, go on and grunt. Now what are you men doing?

HODGE. There is a cuckoo here, your Majesty.

KING. What if there is a cuckoo there?

PODGE. We are building a wall around it, Sire?

KING. Why build a wall around it?

NODGE. To keep it from flying away.

KING. Ha, ha! Don't you know that the bird can fly over the wall?

HODGE. Well, well! Who would have thought of that!

NODGE. How very wise you are, Sire!

KING. You foolish fellows! Well, go on and build your wall.

(_Enter_ SCRODGE, _carrying a door on his back._)

Where are you going with that door?

SCRODGE. I am going on a journey, Sire.

KING. Why do you carry a door?

SCRODGE. I left my money at home, Sire.

KING. Why didn't you leave the door at home?

SCRODGE. I was afraid of thieves.

KING. Afraid of thieves! And you have taken down your door!

SCRODGE. If I have the door with me, they can't break it open to get in.

KING. You foolish fellow! Why didn't you leave your door at home and carry your money?

SCRODGE. Well, well! Who would have thought of that! How very wise you are, Sire!

KING. Ha, ha, ha! Well, go on and carry your door.

(_To Soldiers._)

These Gotham men are foolish. Does it not seem so to you?

SOLDIERS. Aye, Sire!

KING. I'll let them keep their noses. They knew no better than to cut down the trees. Come, we will go away and leave them.

[_King and Soldiers go._]

GOTHAM MEN. Ha, ha, ha!

THE TWO QUESTIONS