Chapter 10
but i notise that the ones whitch does the leest has the most to say. if Keene says mutch more about me i wont let her do enny moar of my xamples. so she had better be cairful what she says. i am going to bed erly for they aint enny of the fellers to talk to.
October 8, 186---brite and fair. i went to school today. dident miss in my lessons mutch not enuf to get licked. Beany had sum good luck and sum how he did his xample rite. Pewt missed but xplained the reeson so well that he dident even get shook. Pewt is grate fer that. he can ast questions so as to maik old Francis think he knows sumthing about it when he dont know ennything. i wish i cood do that. if i dont know the xample i cant ack as if i did, i am wateing for Beany to get a good licking to pay him for being meen to me nites and having all the fellers play in his yard. i bet i woodent have did that to him.
this afternoon there wasent enny school and i thougt i wood have sum fun. i went down to Ed Toles but he had went to drive a man to North Kamton. Frank Hanes had went sumwhere when i went up to his house. then i went up to the Chadwicks but they and Parson Otis and Fatty Gilman had went sumwhere but nobody gnew where. then i went home and found that Potter Goram and Chick Chickering had come down with there butterfli nets to get me to go and get sum lait buterflise. i tell you i hipered down to Moultons field and they wasent there and then up to the grove and they wasent there. then i went home feeling prety loansum.
well there wasent ennything to do for fun so i split sum wood and then mother asted me if i wood screw sum things up in the kitchen to hang close on. so i got the screw driver and went to wirk. while i was wirking Pewt came over. i was awful glad to see Pewt but i thougt he had acked kind of meen to me in not coming over to see me befoar and so i thougt i would punish him a litle befoar i maid up. so i said hi Pewt and went on with my wirk. Pewt sed what are you doing Plupy and i sed saying my prairs before going to bed. then Pewt sed huh and kept quiet and i went on wirking and wisling as if i was aloan. bimbye Pewt sed if you take a hammer and drive the screw in a little way it will taik hold and i sed sort of scornful is that so and he sed yes that is so and if you want to get that screw in this weak you had better do as i say. i dident say ennything only grunted and kep wirking until it broak the head of the screw off then Pewt begun to laff and said there what did i tell you. let me show you how to do it Plupy. i sed supose you think you can bild a barn. Pewt sed peraps i can and i sed sumone is getting prety smart round here and Pewt said i know a feller whitch aint very smart and i sed well if you dont like what you see round here you know where you can go and Pewt he sed i bet i know where i can go and i am going there two old Plupe and the next tim i come round here again you will know it and i sed no sirre i shant know it for when you come over here again i shall be sumwhere elce.
then Pewt went off hollering
Plupys mad and i am glad and i know what will pleeze him taik a nail and scrach his tale and hang him up and greece him.
jest as loud as he cood holer and then he hollered you are a old seesand munky and a bristol brick wild man of Bornio, and i hollered silver is better than pewter and who hooked Perry Moultons apples and Pewt hollered back who et them and i shet up becaus i was afrade mother mite hear him.
well after Pewt had went i felt wirse than ever becaus i realy was glad to see him and wanted him to stay and have sum fun but sumhow i coodent help being meen to him. it is funny how a feller will do jest what he dont want to do and the more he dont want to the more he will do it.
well after Pewt went off mad and i took a hammer and done jest what he told me and them screws did jest as he sed they wood and i dident have enny truble. i gues i was a darn fool for sassing Pewt when he was doing me a good tirn but he needent have called me them names at leest he needent have called me them mad. you can call a feller naimes good natured and he jest laffs but if you call a feller the saim naims mad then they is a row and the fellers dont speek enny more.
well tonite Pewt and Beany had all the fellers over to Beanys house having a grate time and mister Watson Beanys father come out and plaid with them jest lika a boy and they had a lot of fun and then mister Watson Beanys father went in and dressed up in an old stovepipe hat and pertended he was a drunk man and he wood stager agenst the fense and they wood plug him with roten tomatose and cucumbers and nock his old stovepipe hat off and squash on his close and he wood chase them and tumble down and you never see sutch fun in your life. i tell you i was jest about crasy to go over there but i coodent becaus me and Beany was mad and Pewt two so i had to stay on my steps and watch them. you never see sutch fun in your life. mister Watson Beanys father is the funniest man i ever see he dont never drink or get drunk but he can ack like a drunk man jest so you wood think he was drunk and maik you kill yourself laffing.
well after it grew dark i went in to study but i felt so loansum that i went up stairs and went to bed. mother came up and asted me if i was sick and i sed no only i dident feal verry well and she wanted to give me sum castor oil but i sed i was all rite. so she went down after she had felt of my head and it was cold so she sed i was all rite only a little tired.
Cele sed she wood do my xamples for me and i cood copy them in the morning. it is awful hard to give up your frends becaus they have a bad effect on you. i bet it is harder than to give up licker after a man has been a drunkerd all his life. it dont seam to be hard for Pewt and Beany to give me up. they seam to have more fun than ever befoar. enny way i have got to get used to it. father says you can get used to enything if you taik time enuf.
October 9, 186---rany today and windy. about a milion leeves blowed down today. tonite we had a fire in the air tite stove and it seamed moar cheerful. Beany and Pewt coodent have the fellers in Beanys yard. i am still wundering how Beany lerned how to do them xamples. it aint like him to know now. i still feal prety blew.
October 10, 186-- brite and fair. there was a frost last nite. I dident miss today. neether Pewt or Beany spoke to me. tonite i done my choars and went and set on the steps and wached the fellers playing in Beanys yard. i felt prety bad. father sed what is the matter with you. i sed nothing and he sed you have been acking like a sick cat for a weak why dont you go over and play with the boys and i sed i dont want to. he sed you havent had a fite with Elbridge, Elbridge is Beany you know, and i sed no. then he asted me if i had a fite with Clarence, Clarence is Pewt you know, and i sed no, i havent had enny fie with Pewt, then he went in and set by the table and red the Exeter Newsletter whitch always comes out on Fridays. i went in and went up stairs because we dont have xamples on Saturday only speeking and geogrify.
after i went up stairs i went into the front room. it was warm and the windows was open. father had went out on the front steps and i was setting in the window lissening to the fellers and wishing i was out there with them. bimeby i heard father say to mother Joey what is the matter with Harry laitly. he has been acking nummer than a deef mewt and mother sed i dont know what it is. he has done his choars better than i ever gnew him to do them xcept jest befoar crismas and 4th of July and he eets well but he dont play enny moar and he dont seam like himself enny moar. then father he sed i dont like it. i hoap he isnt going to be a lollypop or a goody good boy. if there is ennything i hait in this wirld it is a miss Nancy sort of boy.
Aunt Sarah she up and sed i gess you needent wurry about any boy of yours being a miss Nancy, George Shute, and father laffed and sed well it dont seam as if i ever cood have a boy like that but you cant be sure. as far as i know there aint enny ministers in my family sence the pilgrim fathers landed on the wild New Ingland shoar. then Aunt Sarah she sed peraps it would have been better if they had been a few and father he sed that may be so but i dout it. then father he sed it aint natural for a boy to set round like a sick hen. either he is thinking up sum deviltry or he is getting to be a lollipop and of the 2 things i ruther it wood be the ferst.
then mother sed i dont quite agree with you George. i dont like a miss Nancy enny moar than you do but i dont beleeve it is nessary for a boy to be thinking up deviltry to be a real boy. then father he sed i gess you was never a boy Joey or you woodent say that. A boy is going to raise tune or he aint a boy and you mite as well put him into skerts to onct. i never gnew a puppy to grow up into a good dog unless he chewed up slippers and spoilt moar things than he was wirth. then mother sed that depends on what you call a good dog. if you meen a dog whitch is all the time fiting that is one thing but if you meen a real good dog that is another thing. then father he sed i woodent give a cent for a dog that cant fite. a god dog that is groan up dont care to fite but will if he has to. and a good man dont cair to but will if he has to. they is a difference between a good boy and a goody good boy. i wood ruther my boy wood git into scraips than not. if he dont i know sumthing is rong with him.
then mother she sed if you like to have him get into scraips why do you get so mad with him and lick him, only mother she sed punnish him, when he gets into scraips and father sed dont you see i cant aprove of his scraips for if i did he wood be in scraips all the time and he wood be if he gnew what i was saying. then father began to laff and to tell what he and Gim Melcher and Bill Yung and Beanys father and Pewts father done when they was boys and he asted if all of them fellers wasent pretty good men and Aunt Sarah sed none of them is mutch to brag of and father laffed and sed that shows you aint a good judge of caracter.
i tell you when i herd what father sed i maid up my mind that i wood maik up with Beany and Pewt and we wood show father and Pewts father and Beanys father that we was jest as lifely as they was when they was boys. then i tell you i felt beter than i had felt for a long while and i am going to bed. to-morrow i will maik up with Pewt and Beany.
October 11, 186---brite and fair. today i maid up with Pewt and Beany. it wasent near so hard as i thought it wood be. i gess boath of them missed me two but not as mutch as i missed them becaus they had the other fellers. this afternoon we got up a club whitch we call the Terrible 3. i am the president becaus i got it up. Pewt is the secritery becaus he can wright so good and Beany is the tresurer becaus it dont cost ennything to get in and he aint got enny money to taik cair of. the objeck of the club is to do tuf things and not get found out. i aint got time to wright enny moar about it tonite becaus we aint had a reglar meating of the club yet. we are going to have one tomorrow after chirch and wright out a consecration and bi laws. after we have did this things is going to be ifely round here.
October 12, 186---brite and fair. it is jest raning leeves today. i went to chirch and to sunday school. Beany sed he was going to raise time in chirch so as to lose his gob. he sed a feller whitch was going to be tresurer of the Terible 3 hadent augt to have a chirch gob, but me and Pewt told him he must kep his gob becaus if he wasent going to get caugt when we done tuf things we must be respecktable befoar folks. we told Beany that if he rased time two mutch and a feller hapened to get his windows broak he wood say we fellers done it and then peraps we cood lie out of it and peraps we coodent. so Beany he desided to behaive and to keep his gob, and he done well and only let the wind out of the organ 1 time and that was when he was looking at a rooster fite in old man Elliots yard throug the window, and of coarse when there is a rooster fite or a dog fite or enny kind of a fite a feller has jest got to look at it. the only thing that maid it funier than time was becaus they had got a woman from out of town to sing in the quire and she was singing
the voice of one criing in the wilderniss
and jest then the organ went eooowaugh and sounded like when you step on 40 cats tales to onct and stoped and then begun again and we cood hear Beany pumping as fast as he cood and the old bellose maid a noise just like the braiks on a fire ingine, like this, chunka, chunka, chunka, and everybody laffed and the woman set down mad and woodent sing eny moar.
Chipper and old Hen Dow jawed Beany like time after chirch. Beany he told them why he done it but they dident seam to think that was enny xcuse and kep on jawing him. Chipper he sed he has stood moar from Beany than he had from enny feller and that a house of worship wasent a place for munky shines and this was the last chanct Beany shood have. so Beany kep his gob but he has a narow escaip and will have to be moar cairful nex time.
well after sunday school we met in Beanys barn and rote out the consecration and bi laws. it is a old peeler. i had borrowed sum bi laws of a club father usted to be in and i had rote down a lot of things to put in and Pewt coppied them after we had talked them over becaus Pewt can wright so good. This is what he rote.
Consecration and bi laws of the Terrible 3.
we Pewt and Beany and Plupy do hearbi asosiate ourselfs together under the corperat naim of the Terible 3.
artickle 1. the object of this asosiasion is to brake windows, to plug green apples and ripe tomatose and roten cucumbers at peeple we dont like or whitch wares there best close on a weak day, or whitch feels two big for his britches. to get even with fellers and with peeple whitch has done rong to us in the past or in the future. wether we have to do it with slingshots or roten egs.
resolvd that the use of slingshots and roten egs is only to be used when enny unusuel or crool rong has been did us. and when the punishment must be sevear.
artickle 2. the main objeck of the members is not to get cougt and evry feller whitch is a member must agree never to betray enny other feller if he gets cougt himself and is licked to maik him tell. and enny feller whitch does tell on another member will be maid to eet a live toad and 4 angel wirms. it is no xcuse if he does it under terible tortures sutch as shaking hands with a pensil between your fingers or putting musterd on your tung or licking you with a bed slot in whitch tacts has been put.
artickle 3. the offisers of the asosiation shall be a president a secritary and a tresurer. the duty of the president shall be to call the meatings of the asosiation. the duty of the secritary shall be to wright down what is did at the meatings. the duty of the treasurer is to take cair of the money of the association.
artickle 4. it dont cost ennything to get into the asosiation. the Terrible 3 is good frends and will stand by eech other as long as live remanes and no money makes anny diference. nobody elce can get in but the Terible 3 at enny prise what ever.
artickle 5. steeling is absolootly forbiddon. this aplise to money, gewils, hens, roosters and chickings, dogs, horses and cattle and ennything whitch peeple has in there houses and barns, but does not apli to apples, pares straberries and frutes in their seeson befoar they has been pictd and put in the house or barn and nothing in this consecration shall be considered as hendering enny one of the Terible 3 from pluging ennything at cats dogs or other animals.
artickle 6. at the end of the asosiasion whitch will come when enny of the members is ded or in jale the propity of the asosiasion shall be divided equil between sutch of the members as aint ded or in jale and the records of the asosiation if there is enny shall be birnt and distroid.
bi laws
I. evry member shall be reddy to fite for another member at a moments notise.
II. evry member shall be reddy to lie for another member when ever he can help him by liing. if he can help him by teling the trooth he will be xpected to do so if he can.
III. if a feller gets cougt he is xpected to lay it on to sum feller whitch is likely to do them things whitch he is cougt for doing.
IV. the fellers whitch is most likely to do the things whitch a feller is most likely to get cougt for doing is Fatty Gilman, Skinny Bruce, Tady Fenton, Jack Melvin, Whack, Pozzy and Bug Chadwick, Fatty Melcher, Pop Clark, Hiram Mingo, Ben Rundlett, Ed Tole and several others.
V. evry member has go to commit them naims to memory and keep them at his tungs end becaus he mite need them at enny time.
VI. as far as posiable members must keep out of enny trubble with wimmen. the Terible 3 does not wage war against wimmen. of coarse when a woman has got a husband whitch the Terible 3 has ennything agenst she must taik her chanct but she wont be hirt if she keeps her fingers out of the pye. i have never knew a woman to do that in our lifes. it aint our falt that she is his wife. she done it herself.
VII. as far as posiable the Terible 3 will try to keep out of trubble in school. it aint that we are scart of old Francis but it seams sumtimes as if he had got eys in the back of his hed and gnew evrything a feller thinks befoar he thinks it.
then we all sined. we was going to have 3 or 4 more bi laws but we dident know enny moar roman numbers and you have got to have figger numbers for the artickles and roman numbers for the bi laws. after we had sined it i thougt we cood have got them from the clock. we dident think of that.
after we had sined it Pewt gave it to me to keep as i am the president. he sed he had augt to keep them becaus he is secritary but i told him that artickle 3 of the consecration sed the duty of the secretary was to wright what was did at the meatings and dident say he was to keep the paper. so Pewt give in.
Oct. 13, 186---brite and fair. the secritary of the Terible 3 got licked in school today becaus he sed geogrify is the sience of numbers and the art of compewting by them. he told old Francis he wasent thinking and old Francis he give him a licking to maik him think. tonite the Terible 3 comited our ferst crime. this is the way we done it. we agread to be studding our lessons at 8 oh clock. when it struck 8 we wood go out for a drink or sumthing and meat on Elm strete jest behine Pewts and Beanys house. Pewt and Beany had got a pile of ripe tomatose. then we would ding old William Hobbs door bell and when he come to the door we wood paist him. He always drives us out of his yard so we done it. when it struck 8 oh clock i sed i forgot to shet up my hens and a skunk may come round. Keene sed i will help you. i sed no i will do it. what would you do if we met a skunk. so i went down and hipered over to Elm Strete. Pewt and Beany was there with their hands full of tomatose. Pewt tiptode up and rung the bell. in a minit old Hobbs come to the door with a candle shaded with his hand. as soon as he come out we let ding as hard as we cood eech one 3 or 4 tomatose. one nocked the candle out of his hand and put it out. one hit him square in the mouth and squashed. 2 or 3 hit him in other places and the rest squashed on the house. i wish you cood herd him spitt and sware and holler. jest as soon as we pluged him we started running towards front strete and then went behine the Unitarial chirch throug a hole in Fifields fense into Beanys yard. i wasent away from the house more than 3 minits. when i came in mother sed did you shet the door to the hen coop and i sed yes. i did shet it becaus i thought she mite ast me.
in about half an hour old man Hobbs rung our door bell and asted mother where i was. she sed do you want to see him and he sed where has he been tonite and she sed he has been in studdying all the evening ever sence supper and he sed are you sure and she sed why yes i have been here myself. then he sed well sum boys came to my house and rung my door bell and when i come to the door they threw roten vegitables at me and asaulted me and if i can find out ther edentitty i am going to persecute them to the xtent of the law and send them to jale.
mother she sed it is a shaim and i certainly hoap you will find out who they are and i am very glad to say that my son had nothing to do iwth it and i am sure he wood not do ennything of the kind. so old Hobbs he went away and mother came in and told us. she sed he hadent quite got all of the tomatose out of his wiskers but she hoped he wood ketch them. i hoap so two over the left. it may lern old Hobbs a lesson if he isent two old to learn. i am afrade he is.
October 14, 186---i have got 2 horks. Potter Goram give them to me. they is full groan and verry hansum. one is a hen hork and the other a red taled hork. gess what i naimed them. one is Hork and the other Spitt. mother sed those were dredful naims but i think they are prety good ones. i feed them on meat and fishes and rats and mice. if you poak them with a stick they grab it with his claus and hiss like a snaik. there eys is yellow. i dont let folks poak them.
tonite i called a meating of he Terible 3. i had rote the record of what we had did and Pewt had coppied it. i thougt i had better wright it becaus i can spel so mutch beter than Pewt.
well Pewt read the record and Beany reported that there wasent enny money in the tresury. then i asted if ennybody had ennything to say and Beany sed that we had better paist old decon Aspinwall next for he was so meen. i was afrade he wood lay it onto me becaus i had trubble with him 2 times. then Pewt sed we cood nale up a sine in front of his house sassing him, but i had done that onct for a circus. so we desided to lay for him sum time but not yet. ennyway we have got him marked.
so after supper we took a few grean apples and our sticks and went into Pewts back yard behind the trees and plugged sum apples as hard as we cood without ameing. we fired them in the direxion of J. Albert Clarks house becaus he had ordered me and Beany out of his yard one day jest for nothing.
we wood all plug together jest as hard as we cood plug and then lissen hard. we cood tell by the sound when they wood hit on the roofs or not. bimeby we herd the gingle of glass 2 times. then we begun to play coram and kep hollering and laffin. then we herd J. Ward Levitt holler who in hell is firing rocks through my winders. then he hollered to father and sed George look here and see what your dam boy has been up to and we herd father say what is it Ward and Ward sed he has broak 2 winders in my shop and you have got to pay for them. then father sed all rite. if he done it i will pay but if he hasent done it i wont. so ferst father hollered for me and i dident hear him. then they went over to Beanys and i wasent there and Beanys mother sed i hadent been there. then they come through old Mrs. Seeveys yard and then into Pewts and we were playing coram. then J Ward sed here are the devils and father sed dident you hear me holler and i sed did you holler and looked at him sirprized and father sed i hollered louder than a steem wissel and i sed we were playing coram and making so mutch noise that i gess it drownded your holler out. then he sed how long have you been here and i sed ever sence suppr.
then father sed Ward says you broak 2 winders in his shop, and i sed how cood i when i have been here evry minit. and father sed are you sure you havent been out of this yard sence you come here, now dont you lie to me and i sed hoap to die and cross my throte have i Pewt have i Beany and Pewt and Beany both hoaped to die and crossed there throtes.