Part 17

_Orl._ Put her out of dores; but that I fear my land May go again to _Montague_, I would kill thee, I am loth, To make a beggar of him that way; or else-- Go now you have the liberty of flesh, And you may put it to a double use, One for your pleasure, th'other to maintain Your wellbeloved, he will want. [_Exit Lady._ In such a charitable exercise The virtue will excuse you for the vice. [_Exit Orleans._

_Enter Amiens drawn, Montague, Veramor meeting._

_Mont._ What means your Lordship?

_Ver._ For the love of [God].

_Am._ Thou hast advantage of me, cast away this buckler.

_Mont._ So he is Sir, for he lives With one that is undone--avoyd us boy.

_Ver._ I'll first avoid my safety, Your Rapier shall be button'd with my head, before it touch my Master.

_Am. Montague?_

_Mont._ Sir.

_Am._ You know my sister?

_Mont._ Yes Sir.

_Am._ For a whore?

_Mont._ You lye, and shall lie lower if you dare abuse her honor.

_Enter Lady._

_La._ I am honest.

_Am._ Honest!

_La._ Upon my faith I am.

_Am._ What did then p[e]rsuade thee to condemn thy self?

_La._ Your safety.

_Am._ I had rather be expos'd To danger, than dishonor; th'ast betray'd The reputation of my familie More basely by the falseness of that word, Than if thou hadst delivered me asleep Into the hands of base enemies. Relief will never make thee sensible Of thy disgraces; let thy wants compell thee to it. [_Exit._

_La._ O I am a miserable woman.

_Mont._ Why Madam? are you utterly without means to relieve you?

_La._ I have nothing Sir, unless by changing of these cloaths for worse, and then at last the worst for nakedness.

_Mont._ Stand off boy, nakedness would be a change To please us Madam, to delight us both.

_La._ What nakedness Sir?

_Mont._ Why the nakedness of body Madam, we were Lovers once.

_La._ Never dishonest Lovers.

_Mont._ Honestie has no allowance now to give our selves.

_La._ Nor you allowance against honestie.

_Mont._ I'll send my Boy hence, opportunitie Shall be our servant, come and meet me first With kisses like a stranger at the door, And then invite me nearer to receive A more familiar inward wellcome; where, Instead of tapers made of Virgins wax Th'increasing flames of our desires shall light Us to a banquet: and before the taste Be dull with satisfaction, I'll prepare A nourishment compos'd of every thing That bears a naturall friendship to the blood, And that shall set another edge upon 't, Or else between the courses of the feast We'll dallie out an exercise of time, That ever as one appetite expires another may succeed it.

_La._ O my Lord, how has your nature lost her worthiness! When our affections had their liberty, Our kisses met as temperatelie as The hands of sisters, or of brothers, that Our bloods were then as moving; then you were So noble, that I durst have trusted your Embraces in an opportunity Silent enough to serve a ravisher, And yet come from you--undishonor'd--how You think me altered, that you promise your Attempt success I know not; but were all The sweet temptations that deceive us set On this side, and [on] that side all the waiters, These neither should p[e]rsuade me, nor these force.

_Mont._ Then misery may waste your body.

_Lady._ Yes, but lust shall never.

_Mont._ I have found you still as uncorupted as I left you first Continue so; and I will serve you with As much devotion as my word, my hand Or purse can show you; and to justifie That promise, here is half the wealth I have, Take it, you owe me nothing, till you fall From virtue, which the better to protect I have bethought me of a present means: Give me the Letter; this commends my Boy Into the service of a Lady, whose Free goodness you have bin acquainted with, _Lamira_.

_Lady._ Sir I know her.

_Mont._ Then believe her entertainment will be noble to you; My boy shall bring you thither: and relate Your manner of misfortune if your own Report needs any witness: so I kiss your hand good Lady.

_Lady._ Sir, I know not how to promise, but I cannot be unthankfull.

_Mont._ All that you can implore in thankfulness Be yours, to make you the more prosperous. Farwell my boy,--I am not yet oppress'd. [_Exit Lady Vere._ Having the power to helpe one that's distress'd. [_Exeunt._

_Actus Secundi. Scæna Prima._

_Enter Longaville and Dubois._

_Long._ What shall we do now: swords are out of use, And words are out of credit.

_Dub._ We must serve.

_L[o]ng._ The means to get a service will first spend Our purses; and except we can allow Our selves an entertainment, service will Neglect us; now 'tis grown into a doubt Whether the Mr. or the servants gives the countenance.

_Dub._ Then fall in with Mistresses.

_Long._ They keep more servants now (indeed) than men, But yet the age is grown so populous Of those attendants, that the women are Grown full too.

_Dub._ What shall we propound our selves?

_Long._ I'll think on't.

_Dub._ Do; Old occupations have too many setters up to prosper, some uncommon trade would thrive now.

_Long._ Wee'll e'en make up some half a dozen proper men. And should not we get more Than all your female sinners?

_Dub._ If the house be seated as it should be privately.

_Long._ I, but that would make a multitude of witches.

_Dub._ Witches? how prethee?

_Long._ Thus the bauds would all turn witches to revenge Themselves upon us, and the women that Come to us, for disguises must wear beards, And that's they say, a token of a witch.

_Dub._ What shall we then do.

_Long._ We must study on't With more consideration; stay _Duboyes_ Are not the Lord of _Orleans_ and the Lord Of _Amiens_ enemies?

_Dub._ Yes, what of that.

_Long._ Methinks the factions of two such great men. Should give a promise of advancement now To us that want it.

_Dub._ Let the plot be thine, and in the enterprize I'll second thee.

_Long._ I have it, we will first set down our selves The Method of a quarrell; and make choyce Of some frequented Tavern; or such a place Of common notice, to perform it in By way of undertaking to maintain The severall honors of those enemies. Thou for the Lord of _Orleans_; I for _Amiens_.

_Dub._ I like the project, and I think 'twill take The better, since their difference first did rise From his occasion whom we followed once.

_Long._ We cannot hope less after the report, Than entertainment or gratuity, Yet those are ends, I do not aim at most; Great spirits that are needy, and will thrive, Must labour whiles such troubles are alive. [_Exeunt._

_Enter Laverdine and La-poope._

_La-p._ Slander is sharper than the sword. I have fed this three dayes upon leaf _Tobacco_, for want of other Victuals.

_Lav._ You have liv'd the honester Captain; but be not so dejected, but hold up thy head, and meat will sooner fall i'thy mouth.

_La-p._ I care not so much for meat, so I had but good liquor, for which my guts croak like so many Frogs for rain.

_Lav._ It seems, you are troubled with the wind-Collick, Captain, swallow a bullet: 'tis present remedy I'll assure you.

_La-p._ A bullet? I'll tell you Sir, my panch is nothing but a pile of bullets; when I was in any service I stood between my Generall and the shot, like a mud-wall; I am all lead, from the crown of the head to the soal of the foot, not a sound bone about me.

_La[v]._ It seems you have bin in terrible hot service Captain.

_La-p._ It has ever bin the fate of the low Country wars to spoil many a man, I ha' not bin the first nor shall not be the last: but I'll tell you Sir, (hunger has brought it in to mind) I served once at the Siege of _Braste_, 'tis memorable to this day, where we were in great distress for victuals, whole troops fainted more for want of food then for blood, and died, yet we were resolved to stand it out; I my self was but then Gentleman of a Company, and had as much need as any man, and indeed I had perished had not a miraculous providence preserved me.

_Lav._ As how good Captain?

_La-p._ Marry Sir, e'en as I was fainting and falling down for want of sustenance, the enemy made a shot at me, and struck me full ith' paunch with a penny loaf.

_Lav._ Instead of a bullet!

_La-p._ In stead of a bullet.

_Lav._ That was miraculous indeed; and that loaf sustained you.

_La-p._ Nourished me or I had famished with the rest.

_Lav._ You have done worthy acts being a soldier, and now you shall give me leave to requite your tale, and to acquaint you with the most notorious deeds that I have done being a Courtier. I protest Captain I will lie no more than you have done.

_La-p._ I can indure no lies.

_Lav._ I know you cannot Captain, therefore I'll only tell you of strange things: I did once a deed of charity for it self; I assisted a poor widow in a sute, and obtained it, yet I protest I took not a penny for my labor.

_La-p._ 'Tis no such strange thing.

_Lav._ By _Mars_ Captain, but it is, and a very strange thing too in a Courtier, it may take the upper hand of your penny loaf for a miracle. I could ha' told you how many Ladyes have languished for my love, and how I was once sollicited by the mother, the daughter, and grand-mother; out of the least of which I might have digg'd my self a fortune; they were all great Ladyes, for two of them were so big I could hardly embrace them: but I was sluggish in my rising courses, and therefore let them pass; what means I had is spent upon such as had the wit to cheat me; That wealth being gone, I have only bought experience with it, with a strong hope to cheat others; but see here comes the much declined _Montague_, who had all the Manor houses, which were the body of his estate, overthrowen by a great wind.

_Enter Montague, Mallicorne._

_La-p._ How by a great wind? was he not overthrown by law?

_Lav._ Yes, marry was he: but there was terrible puffing and blowing before he was overthrown, if you observ'd, and believe it Captain, there's no wind so dangerous to a building as a lawyers breath.

_La-p._ What's he with him?

_Lav._ An eminent Citizen, Mounsier _Mallicorne_, let's stand a side and listen their design.

_Mal._ Sir, profit is the Crown of labor, it is the life, the soul of the industrious Merchant, in it he makes his paradise, and for it neglects Wife, Children, Friends, Parents, nay all the world, and delivers up himself to the violence of storms, and to be tos'd into unknown ayrs; as there is no faculty so perillous, so there's none so worthy profitable.

_Mont._ Sir, I am very well possest of it, and what of my poore fortunes remaines, I would gladly hazard upon the Sea: it cannot deal worse with me than the Land, though it sink or throw it in the hands of Pirats. I have yet five hundred pounds left, and your honest and worthy acquaintance may make me a young Merchant; th'one moity of what I have I would gladly adventure.

_Mal._ How adventure? you shall hazard nothing: you shall only joyn with me in certain commodities that are safe arrived unto the Key; you shall neither be in doubt of danger nor dammage; But so much money disburst, so much receive; Sir, I would have you conceive I pursue it not for any good your money will do me, but meerly out of mine own freeness and courtesie to pleasure you.

_Mont._ I can believe no less, and you express a noble nature, seeking to build up a man so ruin'd as my self.

_Lav._ Captain here is subject for us to work upon if we have wit; you hear that there is money yet left, and it is going to be layd out in Rattels, Bels, Hobby-Horses, brown paper, or some such like sale commodities; now it would do better in our purses, upon our backs in good Gold-lace, and Scarlat, and then we might pursue our projects, and our devices towards my Lady _Annabella_; go to, there's a conceit newly landed, heark I stand in good reputation with him, and therefore may the better cheat him: Captain, take a few instructions from me.

_Mont._ What monies I have is at your disposing, and upon twelve I will meet you at the Pallace with it.

_Mal._ I will there expect you, and so I take my leave. [_Exit._

_Lav._ You apprehend me?

_La-p._ Why do ye think I am a dunce?

_Lav._ Not a dunce Captain, but you might give me leave to misdoubt that pregnancy in a Soldier, which is proper and hereditary to a Courtier; but prosecute it, I will both second, and give credit to it. Good Mounsier _Montague_, I would your whole revenues lay within the circuit of mine armes, that I might as easily bestow, or restore it unto you as my curtesie.

_La-p._ My zealous wishes Sir, do accompany his for your good fortunes.

_Lav._ Believe it Sir, our affection towards you is a strong band of friendship.

_Mont._ To which I shall most willingly seal. But believe me Gentlemen in a broken estate, the bond of friendship oft is forfeited, but that it is your free and ingenuous nature to renew it.

_Lav._ Sir, I will amply extend my self to your use, and am very zealously afflicted as not one of your least friends for your crooked fate; But let it not seise you with any dejection, you have as I hear a sufficient competency left, which well disposed may erect you as high in the worlds account as ever.

_Mont._ I cannot live to hope it, much less injoy it, nor is it any part of my endeavor; my study is to render every man his own, and to contain my self within the limits of a Gentleman.

_Lav._ I have the grant of an Office given me by some noble favorites of mine in Court, there stands but a small matter between me and it, if your ability be such to lay down the present summ, out of the love I bear you, before any other man, it shall be confirmed yours.

_Mont._ I have heard you often speak of such a thing; If it be assur'd to you I will gladly deal in it: that portion I have, I would not hazard upon one course, for I see the most certain is incertain.

_La-p._ Having money Sir, you could not light upon men that could give better direction; there is at this time a friend of mine upon the Seas; to be plain with you, he is a pyrate, that hath wrote to me to work his fredom, and by this Gentlemans means, whose acquaintance is not small at Court; we have the word of a worthy man for it, only there is some money to be suddainly disburst, and if your happiness be such to make it up you shall receive treble gain by it, and good assurance for it.

_Mont._ Gentlemen, out of the weakness of my estate you seem (to have some knowledge of my brest) that wou'd if it were possible advance my declined fortunes, to satisfie all men of whom I have had credit, and I know no way better than these which you propose; I have some money ready under my command, some part of it is already promis'd, but the remainder is yours to such uses as are propounded.

_Lav._ Appoint some certain place of meeting, for these affaires require expedition.

_Mount._ I will make it my present business: at twelve, I am to meet _Mallicorne_, the Marchant at the Pallace, you know him Sir, about some negotiation of the same nature, there I will be ready to tender you that money, upon such conditions as we shall conclude of.

_Lav._ The care of it be yours, so much as the affair concerns you.

_Mont._ Your caution is effectuall, and till then I take my leave.

_Lav._ Good Mr _Montague_. [_Exit._

_W[i]thin a clamor, down with their weapons._

_Enter Longavile, and Dubois, their swords drawn, servants and others between them._

_Ser._ Nay Gentlemen what mean you? pray be quiet, have some respect unto the house.

_Long._ A treacherous slave.

_Du._ Thou dost revile thy self base _Longavile_.

_Long._ I say thou art a villain, and a corrupt one, that hast some seven years fed on thy masters trencher, yet never bredst good blood towards him: for if thou hadst, thou'dst have a sounder heart.

_Du._ So Sir, you can use your tongue something nimbler than your sword.

_Long._ Wou'd you cou'd use your tongue well of your Master, friend you might have better imployment for your sword.

_Du._ I say again, and I will speak it loud and often, that _Orleans_ is a noble Gentleman with whom _Amiens_ is too light to poyse the scale.

_Long._ He is the weaker for taking of a prayse out of thy mouth.

_Du._ This hand shall seal his merit at thy heart.

_Lav._ Part them my masters, part them.

_Ser._ Part them Sir, why do you not part them, you stand by with your sword in your hand, and cry part 'em.

_Lav._ Why you must know my friend my cloaths are better than yours, and in a good suit, I do never use to part any body.

_La-p._ And it is discretion.

_Lav._ I marry is it Captain.

_Long. Dubois_ though this place priviledge thee, know where next we meet, the blood which at thy heart flows drops at thy feet.

_Enter Amience in haste, his sword drawn._

_Du._ I would not spend it better than in this quarrell, and on such a hazard.

_Ami._ What uprore's this, must my name here be question'd in Tavern brawls, and by affected Ruffins?

_Lav._ Not we indeed Sir.

_Du._ Fear cannot make me shrink out of your fury, though you were greater than your name doth make you, I am one, and the opposer; if your swoln rage have ought in malice to inforce express it.

_Ami._ I seek thee not, nor shalt thou ever gain That credit, which a blow from me wou'd give thee, By my ---- I more detest that fellow Which took my part than thee, that he durst offer To take my honor in his feeble armes, And spend it in a drinking room; which way went he?

_Lav._ That way Sir, I wou'd you wou'd after; for I do fear we shall have some more scuffling.

_Ami._ [I]'ll follow him, and if my speed o'er take him, I shall ill thank him, for his forwardness. [_Exit._

_Lav._ I am glad he's gone, for I doe not love to see a sword drawn in the hand of a man that lookes so furious, there's no jesting with edge tooles, how say you Captain?

_Cap._ I say 'tis better jesting than to be in earnest with them.

_Enter Orleance._

_Orl._ How now? what's the difference? they say there have bin swords drawn, and in my quarrell: let me know that man, whose love is so sincere to spend his blood for my sake, I will bounteously requite him.

_Lav._ We were all of your side, but there he stands begun it.

_Orl._ What's thy name?

_Dub. Duboyes._

_Orl._ Give me thy hand, [thou] hast received no hurt?

_Dub._ Not any, nor were this body stuck full of wounds, I should not count them hurts, being taken in so honorable a cause as the defence of my most worthy Lord.

_Orl._ The dedication of thy love to me requires my ample bounty, thou art mine, for I do find thee made unto my purposes: Mounsieur _Laverdine_, pardon my neglect I not observed you, and how runs rumour?

_Lav._ Why, it runs my Lord like a foot-man without a cloak, to show that what's once rumour'd it cannot be hid.

_Or[l]._ And what say the rable, am not I the subject of their talk?

_Lav._ Troth my Lord the common mouth speaks foul words.

_Orl._ Of me, for turning away my wife, do they not?

_Lav._ Faith the men do a little murmure at it and say, 'tis an ill president in so great a man, marry the women they rayl out right.

_Orl._ Out upon them rampallions. I'll keep my self safe enough out of their fingers, but what say my pritty jolly composed gallants that censure every thing more desperate than it is dangerous; what say they?

_Lav._ Marry they are laying wagers, what death you shall die; one offers to lay five hundred pounds; And yet he had but a groat about him, & that was in two twopences too to any man that wou'd make it up a shilling; that you were kil'd with a Pistoll charg'd with white Powder; another offerd to pawn his soul for five shillings, and yet no body wou'd take him, that you were stab'd to death, and shou'd die with more wounds than _Cæsar_.

_Orl._ And who shou'd be the Butchers that shou'd do it? _Montague_ and his associates?

_Lav._ So 'tis conjectured.

_La-p._ And believe it, sweet Prince, it is to be feared, and therefore prevented.

_Orl._ By turning his purpose on himself, were not that the way?

_Lav._ The most direct path for your safety. For where doth danger sit more furious than in a desperate man?

_La-p._ And being you have declined his means, you have increast his malice.

_Lav._ Besides the generall report that steems in every mans breath, and stains you all over with infamy, that Time the devourer of all things cannot eat out.

_La-p._ I, for that former familiarity, which he had with your Lady.

_Lav._ Men speak it as boldly as words of compliment; good morrow, good even, or [God] save you Sir, are not more usuall; if the word cuckold had been written upon your forehead in great Capitall Letters, it could not have been dilated with more confidence.

_Orl._ He shall not sleep another night, I will have his blood, though it be required at my hands again.

_Lav._ Your Lordship may, and without hazarding your own person; here's a Gentleman in whose looks I see a resolution to perform it.

_Dub._ Let his Lordship give me but his honorable word for my life, I'll kill him as he walks.

_Lav._ Or pistoll him as he sits at meat.

_La-p._ Or at game.

_Lav._ Or as he is drinking.

_Dub._ Any way.

_Orl._ Wou't thou? call what is mine thine own, thy reputation shall not be brought in question for it, much less thy life; it shall be nam'd a deed of valour in thee, not murder: Farewell. [_Exit._

_Dub._ I need no more encouragement, it is a work I will persuade my self that I was born to.

_Laver._ And you may persuade your self too that you shall be sav'd by it, being that it is for his honorable Lordship.

_Dub._ But you must yield me means, how, when and where.

_Lav._ That shall be our tasks; Nay more, we will be agents with thee: This hour we are to meet him, on the receipt of certain moneys, Which indeed we purpose honestly to cheat him of, And that's the main cause I wou'd have him slain, Who works with safety makes a double gain. [_Exeunt._

_Enter Longaville, Amiens following him._

_Ami._ Stay Sir, I have took some pains to overtake you.--Your name is _Longaville_.

_Long._ I have the word of many honest men for't, I crave your Lordships pardon, your sudden apprehension on my steps made me to frame an answer unwitting and unworthy your respect.

_Ami._ Doe you know me?

_Long._ Yes, my Lord.

_Ami._ I know not you; nor am I well pleased to make this time, as the affair now stands, the induction of your acquaintance; you are a fighting fellow.

_Long._ How my Lord?

_Ami._ I think I too much grace you; rather you are a fellow dares not fight, but spit and puffe and make a noyse, whilst your trembling hand draws out your Sword, to lay it upon andirons, stools or tables, rather than on a man.

_Long._ Your honor may best speak this; yet ---- with little safety, if I thought it serious.