Chapter 13

I write to you just as things come into my head, having taken very few notes, and those, as you must perceive, often without much regard to _unison_ or _time_. It has this minute occurred to me, that I omitted to tell you on my journey onwards, that I visited a little town in _Picardie_, called _Ham_, where there is so strong a castle, that it may be called a _petit Bastile_, and which was then and still is, full of state prisoners and debtors. To this castle there is a monstrous tower, the walls of which are thirty six feet thick, and the height and circumference are proportionable thereto; it was built by the _Conetable de St. Paul_, in order to shut up his master, _Charles_ the VIth, King of France, and contemporary, I think, with our _Henry_ the Vth; but such are the extraordinary turns of all human affairs, that _Mons. le Conetable_ was shut up in it himself many years, and ended his days there.--The fate of this constable brings to my mind a circumstance that happened under my _administration_, at _Land-Guard Fort_, when the King was pleased to trust me with the command of it. I had not been twenty-four hours in possession of what I thought a small sovereignty, before I received a letter in the following terms:

"SIR, Having observed horses grazing on the covered way, that _hath_ done apparent damage, and may do more, I think it my duty to inform you, that his Majesty does not permit horses to feed thereon, &c. &c. (Signed)

"ANTHONY GOODE, Overseer of the Works."

I never was more surprized, than to find my wings were to be thus clipt, by a civil officer of the board of ordnance; however wrong I or my horses had acted, I could not let Mr. GOODE _graze_ so closely upon my authority, without a reprimand; I therefore wrote him an answer in terms as follow: "that having seen a fat impudent-looking strutting fellow about the garrison, it was my order that when his duty led him to communicate any thing to me relative to the works thereof, that he came himself, instead of writing impertinent letters." Mr. _Goode_ sent a copy of his letter and mine to Sir _Charles Frederick_; and the post following, he received from the Office of Ordnance, several printed papers in the King's name, forbidding horses grazing on the WORKS, and _ordering Mr. Goode_ to nail those orders up in different parts of the garrison! but as I had not then learnt that either he, or his _red ribband master_, had any authority to give out, even the King's orders, in a garrison I commanded, but through my hands, I took the liberty, while Mr. _Goode_ and his assistant-son were nailing one up _opposite to my parlour window_, to send for a file of men and put them both into the Black-hold, an apartment Mr. _Goode_ had himself built, being a Master-Mason. By the time he had been ten minutes _grazing_ under this _covered way_, he sent me a message, that he was _asthmatic_, that the place was too close, and that if he died within a _year and a day_, I must be deemed accessary to his death. But as I thought Mr. _Goode_ should have considered, that some of the poor invalids too might now and then be as subject to the asthma as he, it was a proper punishment, and I kept him there till he knew the duty of a soldier, as well as that of a mason; and as I would _his betters_, had they come down and ventured to have given out orders in a garrison under my command; but instead of getting me punished as a _certain gentleman_ aimed at, that able General _Lord Ligonier_ approved my conduct, and removed the man to another garrison, and would have dismissed him the ordnance service, had I not become a petitioner in his favour; for he was too fat and old to work, too proud and arrogant to beg, and he and _his advisers_ too contemptible to be angry with.--But I must return to the castle of _Ham_, to tell you what a dreadful black-hold there is in that tower; it is a trap called by the French _des Obliettes_, of so horrible a contrivance, that when the prisoners are to suffer in it, the mechanical powers are so constructed, as to render it impossible to be again opened, nor would it signify, but to see the body _molue_, i.e. ground to pieces.

There were formerly two or three _Obliettes_ in this castle; one only now remains; but there are still several in the _Bastile_.--When a criminal suffers this frightful death, (for perhaps it is not very painful) he has no previous notice, but being led into the apartment, is overwhelmed in an instant. It is to be presumed, however, that none but criminals guilty of high crimes, suffer in this manner; for the state prisoners in the _Bastile_ are not only well lodged, but liberal tables are kept for them.

An Irish officer was lately enlarged from the _Bastile_, who had been twenty-seven years confined there; and though he found a great sum of money in the place he had concealed it in a little before his confinement, he told Colonel C----, of Fitz-James's regiment, that "having out-lived his acquaintance with the world, as well as with men, he would willingly return there again."

At _Ham_ the prisoners for debt are quite separated from the state prisoners; the latter are in the castle, the former in the tower.

The death of _Lewis_ the XVth gave liberty to an infinite number of unhappy people, and to many who would have been enlarged before, but had been forgotten. When one of these unhappy people (a woman of fashion) was told she might go out; then, (said she) I am sure _Lewis_ the XVth is dead; an event she knew nothing of, tho' it was a full year after the King's death.--Things are otherwise conducted now than in his reign; a wicked vain woman then commanded with unlimited power, both in war and domestic concerns. In this reign, there are able, and I believe virtuous ministers.

I suppose you think as I did, that Madame _Pompadour_ governed by her own powerful charms; but that was not the case; she governed as many other women do, by borrowed charms; she had a correspondence all over the kingdom, and offices of intelligence, where _youth_, _beauty_, and _innocence_, were registered, which were sent to her according to order; upon the arrival of the _goods_, they were dressed, and trained for _use_, under her inspection, till they were fit to be _shewn up_. She had no regard to birth, for a shoe-maker's daughter of great beauty, belonging to one of the Irish brigades, being introduced to the King, he asked her whether she knew him? No: she did not: But did you ever see me before, or any body like me? She had not, but thought him very like the face on the _gros Eccuis_ of France. Madame _Pompadour_ soon found out which of these girls proved most agreeable to the King, and such were retained, the others dismissed.--The expence of this traffick was immense. I am assured where difficulties of birth or fashion fell in the way, ten thousand pounds sterling have been given. Had _Lewis_ the XVth lived a few years longer, he would have ruined his kingdom. _Lewis_ the XVIth bids fair to aggrandize it.